Question of the Day, Sunday 24 November, 2019

[Mia6]

HELLO AND HAPPY SUNDAY!!!

Have you ever had anyone, friends or relatives, show up at your house, unannounced, no phone call, nothing, with suitcases, expecting to spend the weekend? Or just show up without calling. not to spend the night, just to visit? Do you like drop-ins?

My in-laws had family from Toronto, they had immigrated from Italy in the 60s, show up with the suitcase scenario that I described above. It was natural for them. Sometimes they would come down to shop and go back the same day but it was always a drop-in. My ex would throw a fit but my f.i.l thought nothing of it.

What do you hink of drop-ins? I don't like them at all. A lot of times the doorbell will ring and it's someone selling something, etc. Time for another sign on the door.

 

[NY cat man]

The only times we have had unannounced drop-ins were for family emergencies, like the time we had a severe ice storm and Michele's sister and her family stayed with us until their power was restored, or during the Blizzard of '77, when her father and 2 brothers were stranded near us and stayed until the roads were opened, or for medical emergencies. Other than that, everyone calls ahead, except for sales people, and we ignore them.

 

[Mia6]

during the Blizzard of '77, when her father and 2 brothers were stranded near us and stayed until the roads were opened, or for medical emergencies

I remember that one, nasty Beast!

 

[verna davies]

Only happened to me once. I had been in a relationship for about 10 months. One afternoon there was a knock on the door and there he was complete with suitcase and a big grin on his face. He didnt get past the front door, his grin disappeared and so did he.
I dont like casual callers, I never just turn up, always phone first to see if it is convenient and like others to phone me first.

 

[Mia6]

his grin disappeared and so did he.

ha!!!!! What if I showed up, Mush?

 

[verna davies]

I wont tell you where I live

 

[Mia6]

I wont tell you where I live

Hee, hee, I know where you live! Get the bacon rolls and brown sauce ready and a big Christmas cake!!

 

[denice]

I grew up on a farm in a very rural area in Kansas. I was also born in 1956 so it was a different time. Just dropping in occasionally was something that was just done. Women would occasionally do it in the afternoon to visit and gossip. Couples would do it for an evening of playing cards. One of the couples who occasionally did it had a couple of dairy cows for their own families dairy needs and they would often bring a freezer of ice cream. No showing up with a suitcase to stay awhile though.

I haven't lived in an area where that is done for many years. It isn't something that people do to me and I don't do it to others.

 

[Mia6]

One of the couples who occasionally did it had a couple of dairy cows for their own families dairy needs and they would often bring a freezer of ice cream

Cards and a freezer of ice cream, I bet that was fun.
Yes it was a different time.

 

[Tik cat's mum]

All my family live close by and we do drop in without calling first for a brew and catch up. But if we already have something planned or to do we just tell each other got to go now nobody gets offended and all is good. Thing is I would not do that with my friends we always call first. I have also had family turn up with cases when they split from partners I wasn't impressed but did let them stay for a while.

 

[di and bob]

I am too OCD for people to just drop in. It seems they NEVER do when I have just cleaned the house, just when it is at it's worst. And what do they expect for food, clean bedding etc.? I think that is the height of rudness. We always call first, especially to determine if they already have plans, etc. or are even out of town. Since we are remodeling another house to move into right now, we are spending 8 hours at least a day over there, my time for house cleaning and entertainging guests is severly limited right now. Plus our hours are strange to most people, get up very early and go to bed early too. In this day and age of cell phones, it's just common sense to call ahead.

 

[Winchester]

We've never had that happen. Depending on who it might be, the door is open. But I can think of a few people (nobody here) to whom I would like nothing more than to slam the door in their faces. (It is what it is)

 

[maggiedemi]

Have you ever had anyone, friends or relatives, show up at your house, unannounced, no phone call, nothing, with suitcases, expecting to spend the weekend? Or just show up without calling. not to spend the night, just to visit? Do you like drop-ins?

I hate it because my cats are still feral-ish and terrified of strangers. It's just too hard to keep them back from the door and prevent them from escaping. Plus it's not fair to them to keep them locked in a room. In this day and age there is no excuse for not emailing or calling first, everybody has cell phones and computers. I would rather meet people for lunch or dinner at a restaurant.

 

[posiepurrs]

I sort of had that happen. When I was working my brother in law called my husband the night before Thanksgiving day and told him that he, his wife and their daughter would be here for Thanksgiving and for a few days after! I was very tired from work because I was a florist so it was a busy time for me. I tend to be OCD about cleaning before we have visitors. Visitors who do not call or are not invited are not welcome. That may be rude, but I was always taught that it was not polite to invite yourself. I did make them feel welcome but I resented the entire time. Now days I am a little more out spoken. My husbands sister told me she wanted to come for a visit and stay with us since he is sick. I have no problem with her coming north to see him, but I don't have a place for her to sleep so she would have to stay in a motel. When the kids left home, I turned their bedrooms to other uses and got rid of the bedroom furniture (mainly to avoid problems like this!). Just call me a crabby old hermit!!

 

[LTS3]

I have cousins who drop by my parents house whenever they feel like it. It's one of my mom's sisters plus her adult daughters and usually at least one or two of the adult daughters' children. Sometimes the adult daughters bring their friends and the children of those friends along, none of whom my mom knows.They always say "they're in the area and decided to stop by" but they live on the other side of the state, about 3 hours away One time they did this on a weekday afternoon. Both parents were working, my siblings and I were at our own jobs. The cousins called my mom up at work literally an hour before they arrived and said they "were in the area and were going to stop by". Mom can't say no to anyone so she left work early to get home before the cousins arrived and had to bail on helping me bake cookies for a work event. We all ended up going out to a fancy-ish dinner that lasted well past 8pm. I ended up buying cookies to take to take to the work event which didn't go over too well because people were expecting home baked cookies.

I cannot stand people who just drop in unannounced

 

[neely]

Drop-ins yes, multiple times but suitcases, no. If someone wants to drop in they better bring a tasty treat with them. We would get more people dropping by unexpectedly when our kids were younger but nowadays we get very few unexpected visitors. There are some friends who I would open the door up to with welcome arms and others who I would bolt the locks.

 

[MoonstoneWolf]

We used to and it really annoyed me. Not so much that I didn't want to see them but they would expect me to just call in work at the last minute and demand 1 or 2 weeks off starting then. And if we couldn't take the time off they'd get upset. They did that to me and my parents. Doesn't really bother us now that I'm retired but then most of them are deceased. And you don't just "drop in" when you travel 600 miles to get somewhere.

Born in 1955 and up til I was a teenager family lived like blocks away from each other (at least in my family). The dropping in unannounced didn't start until I was in the work field myself sometime in the 70s.

 

[sweet jane flash]

Oh my it is true times have changed. Back in the 70's it was common and acceptable to drop in even in the middle of the night. I never had anyone do it with suitcases though. One time my fiance and I dropped in at Jerry Garcia's house about 2am and he got up and started playing the guitar and serenading us. This was before he got famous. These days, unless it's family I won't even answer the door, I despise the drop in--I'd much rather have the available time to have a good visit. Also it is nice to have specialty food and beverage ready for the visit. I agree, these days there just really is no reason why visitors can't call ahead of time.

 

[Sidewinder]

Times have changed and attitudes are different... when I lived in Coronado, my home was always open to friends, they'd enter via the back gate and show up unannounced at my sliding glass patio door. No problem... this behavior was acceptable back in the day when I had huge wooden skateboard ramps in my yard, and those same friends would usually bring party materials with them so it was no big deal. If one or two of them needed a place to crash for whatever reason, we always had plenty of room... worst-case scenario, I'd break out the field gear (sleeping bags & pads) and let my guest(s) crash on the floor. One time, I let a former professional surfer crash at my house for a week or so, he was going through a hard time so it was only right to allow this. Later, I gave him a lift in the big truck to a relative's home in Colorado.

Of course, this sort of old school hospitality had its occasional downside... for instance, my good friend Geno went roaring off to Tijuana one night with another hand while the rest of us stayed at my house and partied. Geno was completely hammered from tequila shots when he returned, so I let him crash on the bed while I slept on the floor, right? Well, I woke in the middle of the night, moonlight streaming through the patio window and door, and I saw that my friend had departed... he only lived a few blocks away, so no worries, I figured he made it home on his bicycle. Intent upon swapping my floor position for the nice comfy mattress, I rose and literally dove onto the bed... and landed in a huge puddle of puke the consistency of oatmeal. Took me at least 20 minutes to strip the bedding and clean the mattress, then I had to lie back down on the floor and go to sleep. Geno showed up later that morning with a big grin on his face, and we shared a laugh over the incident.

Meh, my friends & I were that close back in the old days... I can still remember Geno catching major air while riding a tricked-out cruiser at a local skatepark which had recently shut down. I was following right behind him at the time, gracefully carving at high speed on my own tricked-out cruiser, and he launched off a projecting point to sail from the snake run into the deep bowl... he must have been 6 or 8 feet off the surface of the concrete bowl, and my subsequent launch was nearly as high, but we landed on the downslope so it wasn't too hard on the bikes at the end of our run. In those days, painfully severe injuries were common... I recall seeing one rider land in another bowl with his handlebars still turned, and one bar end (with grip) jabbed him in the stomach, poor dude was lying there at the bottom of the bowl in a fetal ball, groaning with pain from the sudden injury. Ah, yes, those were the days... and of course, safety gear was uncool at the time, true riders depended upon skill to avoid paying the piper by slamming the concrete, LOL.

TIMES HAVE CHANGED, FOLKS ARE LESS HOSPITABLE NOWADAYS, BUT IF A FRIEND SHOWED AT MY DOOR AND NEEDED A PLACE TO CRASH FOR A DAY OR TWO, I'D STILL LET HIM FOR OLD TIMES' SAKE.

 

[cheeser]

When I was growing up, it was fairly common for people to just show up with their suitcases and "stay a spell." But back in those days, they were good house guests, and pitched in with the chores, didn't expect to be waited on hand and foot, didn't want you to to go any extra trouble on their account, brought a couple of buckets of chicken or offered to take you out to dinner, etc.

Nowadays, friends and relatives aren't always as considerate. They seem to think we're running a B&B, where their every wish is our command, or something like that. Then they pretty much spend the whole time on their iPhones -- texting, watching videos, checking their Facebook page, and that sort of thing. So I'm not sure what the point of the visit was. *scratches head*

Suffice it to say, I don't enjoy people just dropping by on a whim like I used to.