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- Mar 17, 2005
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Oh!! You guys are great! I don't know- I don't feel like I have any choice but to still look for her. Sometimes I wonder now that it's been so long if she jsut got in trouble that night with a wild animal, or if she was sick and I didn't know so she went off to die. They are obviously not good thoughts but I have to entertain the idea since no one seems to *reallly* know that it's my cat and the sightings are all over the place within the same day or two so some of them have to be false.
I had a dream about her last night that I finally found her and was holding her. I would just give anything to see that little face again. It would change everything.
I don't know how anyone goes through this without this message board. It seems like such a private type of pain now as I'm sure others think I'm probably over it by now...but I'm far from it. The longer the time passes, the more I miss her. I haven't been taping as much - it's hard to watch everyday and see nothing.. but I do still tape every couple of days because I can't bear the thought of missing it if she did show up. At what point does one finally accept that their kitty is not coming home.
If something bad did happen to her that first night, all of this work isn't bringing me any closer. At this point, i just want to know if she's alive or not. Sorry to sound so down.. I was very excited with all the success stories after 2, 3, 4 weeks.. I'm going on 5 1/2 weeks now though and there aren't many success stories for a kitty with no tags after that point. I'm trying to stay positive. I jsut keep hoping she'll show up on my poarch. Maybe she got pregnant and had the babies in the woods (God i hope not) and she is caring for them until they are old enough to survive on their own (even the thought of this makes me sooo sad for the hypothetical kittens), and she will be back after that.
Who knows- I'm entertaining any and all ideas at this point just to keep hope.
I was fixing one of the signs that was falling down the other day and a lady was raking and she said "oh did you find your cat!" i said no not yet and she said "i'm so upset because i was positive i had your cat. It had been in my yard and he came right to me so i locked him in the house for you. I was going to call but I wanted to double check the poster first, but this kitty didn't have white paws and yours did". It was heartbreaking. Finally FINALLY someone actually HAS the cat in their house, and it's not her. This woman lives only .25 miles from me, if that so it would have been believable.
sigh. How is everyone else doing here? All i do is talk about myself!! How long has everyone else been missing their kitties? Are you still looking?
I had a dream about her last night that I finally found her and was holding her. I would just give anything to see that little face again. It would change everything.
I don't know how anyone goes through this without this message board. It seems like such a private type of pain now as I'm sure others think I'm probably over it by now...but I'm far from it. The longer the time passes, the more I miss her. I haven't been taping as much - it's hard to watch everyday and see nothing.. but I do still tape every couple of days because I can't bear the thought of missing it if she did show up. At what point does one finally accept that their kitty is not coming home.
If something bad did happen to her that first night, all of this work isn't bringing me any closer. At this point, i just want to know if she's alive or not. Sorry to sound so down.. I was very excited with all the success stories after 2, 3, 4 weeks.. I'm going on 5 1/2 weeks now though and there aren't many success stories for a kitty with no tags after that point. I'm trying to stay positive. I jsut keep hoping she'll show up on my poarch. Maybe she got pregnant and had the babies in the woods (God i hope not) and she is caring for them until they are old enough to survive on their own (even the thought of this makes me sooo sad for the hypothetical kittens), and she will be back after that.
Who knows- I'm entertaining any and all ideas at this point just to keep hope.
I was fixing one of the signs that was falling down the other day and a lady was raking and she said "oh did you find your cat!" i said no not yet and she said "i'm so upset because i was positive i had your cat. It had been in my yard and he came right to me so i locked him in the house for you. I was going to call but I wanted to double check the poster first, but this kitty didn't have white paws and yours did". It was heartbreaking. Finally FINALLY someone actually HAS the cat in their house, and it's not her. This woman lives only .25 miles from me, if that so it would have been believable.
sigh. How is everyone else doing here? All i do is talk about myself!! How long has everyone else been missing their kitties? Are you still looking?