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- Apr 7, 2014
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Hi
I am sorry this has been so hard on you and your sweet kitty. It sounds like she sure gave all she had to stay with you here. I am so sorry she has such a bad cancer and that really there isn't any treatment for it. I wish there was. I wish there was something that could be done to extend her life and keep her comfortable.
The decision to euthanize is such a final decision. Once done it is done and can't be undone. I know you know that. I know everyone knows that but sometimes you have to say it. It is so scary and then no matter what you are left with doubt when it is done and you second guess yourself about your choice forever. I know I have.
I have to go back to what the lady who's cat Amanda had cancer said to me "Life just isn't fun for her anymore" and I think that is a good way to look at it. Life should be fun. If not, what is the point. It isn't about them making life fun for us, although they do. It is about them and us making the best decisions we can for them. Sometimes you try heroics and do everything you can to save them. If that doesn't work you have to come to realize that sometimes the best decision to make is to let them leave their bodies with dignity and peace.
I had a cat once that I couldn't save. She was very ill with hepatic lipidosis and pancreatitis. It may have been more than that, I don't know. She was very ill and I was working at a regular vet hospital and didn't know what I do now. I tried all I could. Had a specialist come in and do biopsy and ultrasound etc. Back then that was a huge deal as nobody did that then for animals. I had her at home hooked up to IV fluids and set up in a cage. I did force feeding and really tried. This is before they put feeding tubes into cats. I buried my head into every book and called every contact I had. I sat up night after night. I really truly though that if I really tried I could save her. If I really believed and applied myself I could save her. She could be that one in a million miracle cat that lived and I would have done anything to have her live. After being up for days and nights with her I finally passed out. I awoke to her dead half way across the bedroom floor. I knew she would die. I had disconnected the fluids and left the cage unlatched. I did so in a defeated stupor from exhaustion. I got the biopsy results back the same day. From the time I had first thought something wasn't right and the vet said she was fine but I did bloodwork anyway, till the time she was dead was less than a week. But in that week I made her suffer. She could barely breath towards the end. She had so much fluid built up everywhere. She was so very sick. And I couldn't come to terms with her death because I thought if I really tried hard enough maybe just maybe she would live. She didn't and I should have put her to sleep. She was three years old. Had I put her to sleep I would be saying I should have tried.
Sometimes there isn't anything you can do but let them leave this world peacefully. Rarely do they die quietly at home. I know mine didn't. I know I slept through what must have been awful. I still feel horrible about that and that was so very long ago. I was in my early 20's then and I was so ignorant.
I am so sorry for what you are going through. Remember that you are the only one who really knows your cat and how she is doing. You are the best one to make a decision. Listen to your gut.
I am sorry this has been so hard on you and your sweet kitty. It sounds like she sure gave all she had to stay with you here. I am so sorry she has such a bad cancer and that really there isn't any treatment for it. I wish there was. I wish there was something that could be done to extend her life and keep her comfortable.
The decision to euthanize is such a final decision. Once done it is done and can't be undone. I know you know that. I know everyone knows that but sometimes you have to say it. It is so scary and then no matter what you are left with doubt when it is done and you second guess yourself about your choice forever. I know I have.
I have to go back to what the lady who's cat Amanda had cancer said to me "Life just isn't fun for her anymore" and I think that is a good way to look at it. Life should be fun. If not, what is the point. It isn't about them making life fun for us, although they do. It is about them and us making the best decisions we can for them. Sometimes you try heroics and do everything you can to save them. If that doesn't work you have to come to realize that sometimes the best decision to make is to let them leave their bodies with dignity and peace.
I had a cat once that I couldn't save. She was very ill with hepatic lipidosis and pancreatitis. It may have been more than that, I don't know. She was very ill and I was working at a regular vet hospital and didn't know what I do now. I tried all I could. Had a specialist come in and do biopsy and ultrasound etc. Back then that was a huge deal as nobody did that then for animals. I had her at home hooked up to IV fluids and set up in a cage. I did force feeding and really tried. This is before they put feeding tubes into cats. I buried my head into every book and called every contact I had. I sat up night after night. I really truly though that if I really tried I could save her. If I really believed and applied myself I could save her. She could be that one in a million miracle cat that lived and I would have done anything to have her live. After being up for days and nights with her I finally passed out. I awoke to her dead half way across the bedroom floor. I knew she would die. I had disconnected the fluids and left the cage unlatched. I did so in a defeated stupor from exhaustion. I got the biopsy results back the same day. From the time I had first thought something wasn't right and the vet said she was fine but I did bloodwork anyway, till the time she was dead was less than a week. But in that week I made her suffer. She could barely breath towards the end. She had so much fluid built up everywhere. She was so very sick. And I couldn't come to terms with her death because I thought if I really tried hard enough maybe just maybe she would live. She didn't and I should have put her to sleep. She was three years old. Had I put her to sleep I would be saying I should have tried.
Sometimes there isn't anything you can do but let them leave this world peacefully. Rarely do they die quietly at home. I know mine didn't. I know I slept through what must have been awful. I still feel horrible about that and that was so very long ago. I was in my early 20's then and I was so ignorant.
I am so sorry for what you are going through. Remember that you are the only one who really knows your cat and how she is doing. You are the best one to make a decision. Listen to your gut.