Try not to think too hard on the future as researchers are learning by leaps and bounds about how the brain works and there may be a really good treatment or even a cure right around the corner for Ben. Just take care of him in the here and now.
If Ben needs hospitalization, you know you are doing it for him. It is where he needs to be to be safe.
Never forget how very lucky your little boy is to have you and your husband as parents. Mental illness is something most people want to hide. I don't know why people don't understand it is a disease just like cancer or diabetes. Because of your proactive well informed approach, Ben is going to have the best life he can. If he had to have this disease he sure couldn't have gotten any better parents to help him cope.
My heart is breaking for you and your husband. Parents just want to make sure their children are happy, healthy and know they are loved. To watch your child completely meltdown in such a drastic way is an agony I cannot even begin to imagine.
Know I am keeping your family in my heart