training a cat to not sleep on ur neck

[pmantis]

we have a new kitten, 10 weeks old, and he already tends to sleep on my neck, sometimes i don't mind this, but when i really need some sleep so i can function at work, id like him to sleep else wear, like, next to me, or basically anywhere but my face region.

as far as i know the only way to train him is to keep moving him when he keeps coming back to my face.

anyone got any tips?

 

[hissy]

Put him into his own little room with a radio playing on low, a nice warm place to sleep, toys and litter pan, food and water. Play with him for about 20 minutes before tucking him in with an interactive toy like Da Bird (supervised toy only) then give him a meaty treat and put him to bed.

If you absolutely want him on the same bed with you- add some lemon oil to your hand cream and put it on thick on your neck and face- the citrus smell will repel him.

 

[strange_wings]

I've always just kept tucking kittens beside me if they must be close. One (yes, the same one that cried till he was 8 months old!

) still likes to sleep tucked beside me with his head on my left shoulder and his left paw stretched up and resting below my neck. He's down this since he was 10 weeks old.

I have another one, currently, who's close to 9 months old and will try to get really close to the point that he's trying to lay on my face. Shifting him to the side a couple of times usually works.

 

[c1atsite]

After the mention of lemon, I now wonder if bergamot would work

When Daisy was a few weeks old, I felt I had little choice but to give her the "Panic Mouse" (toy)(image click here) in order to make her tired.

I was working at Morgan Stanley back then and the boss wasn't the best boss in the world and I needed to be there by 8:00 AM. Panic Mouse is an unsupervised toy (it's automatic).

I hope I don't get into trouble for saying that.

Daisy is now 5 years old and a happy kitty

 

[otto]

Originally Posted by hissy

Put him into his own little room with a radio playing on low, a nice warm place to sleep, toys and litter pan, food and water. Play with him for about 20 minutes before tucking him in with an interactive toy like Da Bird (supervised toy only) then give him a meaty treat and put him to bed.

If you absolutely want him on the same bed with you- add some lemon oil to your hand cream and put it on thick on your neck and face- the citrus smell will repel him.

I don't think shutting a ten week old kitten away all alone all night is a good idea. A kitten that already is so bonded that he wants to sleep on his mama's neck, in my opinion would not do well at all with this kind of isolation, in fact I think it would be cruel to shut him away.

to OP: Just keep taking taking him off your neck and curling your arms around him. However most cats have very specific sleep with their human habits, they want to sleep on you where they want to sleep on you, period.

You'll get used to it!

 

[addiebee]

Sigh.... he wants that CLOSENESS(comfort)!!! I also don't think shutting him away is good, tho' Hissy is really an expert on cats. I couldn't do it. I have an adult cat - Ghost - who LOVES being up around my face and neck. That's how he likes to be cuddled and no amount of moving changes it. However, with sleep, he just likes to have physical contact and will sleep alongside my leg. Maybe keep putting the kitten someplace a little better, stroke him... and yes, make sure baby is tuckered out first. Easier to retrain 'em young.

I have SEVEN cats in my house - Casper gets his own room at night since he's afraid of the others. But often - even if I just take a nap - I wake up with four or five kitties pressed up against me or ON me. They literally PIN me under the covers!! If I am on my stomach... at least two will be in the V of my legs!

 

[otto]

Lots of play time and burning off of energy is important of course, but I don't think it's going to have any effect on where the kitten wants to sleep. A baby wants to be close to her mother, it's a natural thing.

Baby (rb 1/98) slept on my head from the first day he came home with me as a wee bit of red fur and continued to do so even as a 14 pound cat

. Ootay (rb 5/09) always slept in my arms, and when Tolly came, he also, has had to be curled within my arms since he first came as a tiny red kitten, Ootay simply curled herself around him, within my arms. Mazy and Jennie were both already adults when they came to me and it took time for them to want to sleep with me, but now Mazy sleeps next to my pillow and always has a part of her touching my neck, tail or paw or back. Jennie is still experimenting with where she likes best to sleep on the bed, trying the foot of the bed, on my hip, on my legs.....she's even tried taking Tolly's spot (didn't work) and Mazy's spot (hasn't worked).

Bibbs (rb3/05) and Sissy (rb 12/97) were my burrowers and slept under the covers in the crook of my legs.

Even my girlhood cat, Muffin, always slept on top of me.

 

[bunnelina]

You've had this kitten for what, three days? And already you've written in that you have "problems" with his crying and his need for closeness.

I was worried this was going to happen when you wrote in earlier asking for advice on how to pick a kitten that wasn't going to be too "lazy" or too "crazy."

I strongly recommended that you reconsider getting a kitten because I didn't think you were ready to raise one. A kitten requires a lot of love, patience, and attention. Let him sleep with you if he wants to. Go sleepless for a few weeks; it's what we all expect with a kitten, and it's what we all do, in the interests of having a happier, healthier kitten. If you try to "train" a kitten this young it will develop behavior problems and I can tell you'll have no patience with those if you are already unhappy with perfectly normal kitten behavior.

And, please, let him cry if he wants to talk to you. I know you've complained already about that, too. It's what kittens do.

And, again, if you are really committed to this kitten and not planning to return him, consider getting a SECOND kitten. At least they'll be able to take care of each other, play, cuddle, etc. when you're too busy. It's not that much more work for you and it will give your kitten a companion for life. If you go out to work every day or are out of the house for hours, and if you expect to get 8 hours of sleep a night, it's the kindest, most humane thing to do. This kitten clearly hates to be alone.

And finally, keep in mind that he is going to grow up to be a CAT. I suspect you got a kitten because you think cats are boring. Now you're seeing what a responsibility kittens really are. They are cute but they are babies, and you need to give them everything they need, on their terms, not yours.

I don't meant to discourage you from writing in here with issues, but I honestly can't help putting the kitten's needs ahead of yours. None of us can. You have to tolerate this kitten's kitten behavior. Most of us love listening to them talk and wanting to cuddle with us all night long.

 

[otto]

Originally Posted by Bunnelina

You've had this kitten for what, three days? And already you've written in that you have "problems" with his crying and his need for closeness.

I was worried this was going to happen when you wrote in earlier asking for advice on how to pick a kitten that wasn't going to be too "lazy" or too "crazy."

I strongly recommended that you reconsider getting a kitten because I didn't think you were ready to raise one. A kitten requires a lot of love, patience, and attention. Let him sleep with you if he wants to. Go sleepless for a few weeks; it's what we all expect with a kitten, and it's what we all do, in the interests of having a happier, healthier kitten. If you try to "train" a kitten this young it will develop behavior problems and I can tell you'll have no patience with those if you are already unhappy with perfectly normal kitten behavior.

And, please, let him cry if he wants to talk to you. I know you've complained already about that, too. It's what kittens do.

And, again, if you are really committed to this kitten and not planning to return him, consider getting a SECOND kitten. At least they'll be able to take care of each other, play, cuddle, etc. when you're too busy. It's not that much more work for you and it will give your kitten a companion for life. If you go out to work every day or are out of the house for hours, and if you expect to get 8 hours of sleep a night, it's the kindest, most humane thing to do. This kitten clearly hates to be alone.

And finally, keep in mind that he is going to grow up to be a CAT. I suspect you got a kitten because you think cats are boring. Now you're seeing what a responsibility kittens really are. They are cute but they are babies, and you need to give them everything they need, on their terms, not yours.

I don't meant to discourage you from writing in here with issues, but I honestly can't help putting the kitten's needs ahead of yours. None of us can. You have to tolerate this kitten's kitten behavior. Most of us love listening to them talk and wanting to cuddle with us all night long.

Well said. Kittens are babies who need a lot of care and patience and understanding, and they grow up to be cats, who need the same.

 

[pmantis]

"let him cry"

apart from having no choice, i dont have an issue with it anyway, i was merely asking for recommendations not "complaining" about quieting him down to atleast a normal meow instead of a scream.

"go sleepless for weeks"

easier said than done, im not a female, im a male, and i work 40 hours a week, id like some sleep, weather you see this as complaining or asking for advice for the above, is not my problem.

"let him cry if he wants to talk to you"

he isnt talking to me, he is running mad up and down the house SCREAMING, i can only wish for him to simply "talk to me" so i can speak back.

"I suspect you got a kitten because you think cats are boring"

this isnt a question, and i dont have an answer, its just plain insulting. thankyou

"Most of us love listening to them talk and wanting to cuddle with us all night long."

you clearly dont understand, id love to chat to my cat, have him meow back when i talk etc, he constantly meows, and when i mean constantly I MEAN CONSTANTLY, screaming loud! im not sure if its from this post that you read it, or another, but you obviously didnt read it correctly. i love to cuddle my cat, and heres where the "re reading my post" comes in, he sleeps on my neck and wants to walk on my face while im trying to sleep, and remember when i said, he meows loud to? well he does that in my ear, im not sure if you require sleep the next day to work or not but i do, and thats why, i was asking for ADVICE, not your insulting post telling me how wrong i am and how everything i doing is wrong and that i dont care for kittens, and that i just get them for entertainment.

You havnt helped me, so please dont bother trying anymore.

Regards.

 

[-_aj_-]

If you dont want your kitten do that then dont have him sleep in the same room as you it really is that simple both of my cats from 6 weeks old have not slept in the same room as me or my partner....its done them no harm, as Hissy says tire the kitty out before its bed time...both of my cats adore me even though they do not sleep in my bed with me. Both me and my partner are bad sleepers so having 2 hyper kittens running round on us just wasnt an option on a night time

Im sorry i cant help more and i hope you dont find my post to aggresive it isnt intended that way

 

[otto]

Originally Posted by -_aj_-

If you dont want your kitten do that then dont have him sleep in the same room as you it really is that simple both of my cats from 6 weeks old have not slept in the same room as me or my partner....its done them no harm, as Hissy says tire the kitty out before its bed time...both of my cats adore me even though they do not sleep in my bed with me. Both me and my partner are bad sleepers so having 2 hyper kittens running round on us just wasnt an option on a night time

Im sorry i cant help more and i hope you dont find my post to aggresive it isnt intended that way

but this is a ten week old baby, that is left alone 8 or more hours a day. Of course he is crying. Now he's going to be shut up alone for 8 hours a night too? This kitten will get no socialization at all.

Your kittens had each other, so were not alone.

Cats need to be around their people. It is not true that cats are solitary creatures.

pmantis: Please try to be more accepting here. We care about this little baby that you have taken responsibility for. Sometimes our concern can make us a little sharp.

You don't seem to understand that this kitten is a baby. Babies cry. Especially babies left alone for so much time.

If you are gone 8 or 9 hours a day, please hire a pet sitter, someone to look in on him for an hour or so a couple of times a day. Babies need constant attention, and care. The baby year doesn't last forever, but yes when you adopt a baby, you need to be prepared to go without sleep.

And there is more to come:

When this kitten gets to be about two or three months old he is going to start becoming very lively. He will knock down anything not secured, and shred toilet paper and climb curtains and blinds. He will go and go and go. You will, again, be losing sleep.

It's really too bad you didn't take the advice you got originally here, to take your time, research breeds, and consider adopting an adult cat whose personality was already developed.

You have adopted a kitten with the blood from a talkative energetic breed. You have taken on a responsibility, and this means taking care of the baby properly, and this means losing sleep. There is no other way around it, if you want to raise a kitten to become a secure, well socialized happy cat.

Leaving him alone all day, and shutting him away at night will not allow your kitten to develop and socialize properly.

He cries because he's LONELY.

 

[-_aj_-]

Originally Posted by otto

but this is a ten week old baby, that is left alone 8 or more hours a day. Of course he is crying. Now he's going to be shut up alone for 8 hours a night too? This kitten will get no socialization at all.

Cats need to be around their people. It is not true that cats are solitary creatures.

pmantis: You don't seem to understand that this kitten is a baby. Babies cry. Especially babies left alone for so much time.

If you are gone 8 or 9 hours a day, please hire a pet sitter, someone to look in on him for an hour or so a couple of times a day. Babies need constant attention, and care. The baby year doesn't last forever, but yes when you adopt a baby, you need to be prepared to go without sleep.

And there is more to come:

When this kitten gets to be about two or three months old he is going to start becoming very lively. He will knock down anything not secured, and shred toilet paper and climb curtains and blinds. He will go and go and go. You will, again, be losing sleep.

It's really too bad you didn't take the advice you got originally here, to take your time, research breeds, and consider adopting an adult cat whose personality was already developed.

You have adopted a kitten with the blood from a talkative energetic breed. You have taken on a responsibility, and this means taking care of the baby properly, and this means losing sleep. There is no other way around it, if you want to raise a kitten to become a secure, well socialized happy cat.

Leaving him alone all day, and shutting him away at night will not allow your kitten to develop and socialize properly.

He cries because he's LONELY.

I do not agree with you! I have two very social cats they were left from 7am till the earliest 6pm granted they had each other to play with each day and on a night when they wernt in the same bedroom as us you have to remember each kitten/cat is different, handles different situations differently to another cat what is good for one may not be good for another

shoot me down but i whole heartedly agree with Hissy on this, a tired cat owner is no ood to an energetic kitten which the kitten will get even more restless if owner is to tired to play and show attention

 

[otto]

I edited my post to point out that your kittens had each other.

This ten week old kitten is already alone 8-9 hours a day.

And he has only been away from his mama and litter mates what, three days? Four? That is not enough time to adjust to his new circumstances.

And now he will be alone 8 hours a night too. That gives only 8 hours a day with any human (or any other) contact.

That is just wrong and borders on neglect in my opinion. Poor little baby.

 

[-_aj_-]

Originally Posted by otto

I edited my post to point out that your kittens had each other.

This ten week old kitten is already alone 8-9 hours a day.

And he has only been away from his mama and litter mates what, three days? Four? That is not enough time to adjust to his new circumstances.

And now he will be alone 8 hours a night too. That gives only 8 hours a day with any human (or any other) contact.

That is just wrong and borders on neglect in my opinion. Poor little baby.

so how long should the OP be spending with the kitten? and imo saying words like neglect is wrong and will only push the OP away from this site and that is as a site we do not want....Flash didnt orginally have Sooty therefore your calling me neglectful and propbably more people on this site, I hated the fact i had to work so many hours and be away from either one of them but these things do happen
Otto I do agree though that after 4 days isnt that long that a cat would settle straight into a rountine of someone who works that many hours

To the OP is there any chance of you getting a second cat to help guide your new kitten

 

[otto]

I apologize to anyone who finds my post offensive.

However I believe when you adopt an animal you take responsibility for the animal and if that means losing sleep to give him the proper attention as he adjusts, well then that's just the way things go. The kitten can't speak up for himself. The kitten should come first.

There may be many other times in a pet's life when she/he will need special care, and the human will lose sleep (or go broke

). Raising the baby could be viewed as a little bit of practice for those other times.

This all should be taken into consideration before adopting a pet.

Okay, so it's too late now, he has adopted the kitten.

So now, what I am saying is, this is the way it is when you have a pet: You are this kittens ONLY world. This baby relies on your for everything, and always will. Get in the habit now, of putting this kitten's needs first in your life. Leaving a kitten to fend for himself for 16 + hours a day/night is just wrong.

Why even have him in the first place?

 

[addiebee]

Sigh - this is why I don't have kittens - only adults. And one of them is whiny enough as it is.

pmantis - I would suggest a playmate for him as others have done, if you can afford it. And get that snugglekitty with the heartbeat... put your smell on it - sounds silly but rub it on you or rub a stinky shirt all over it. He is a demanding, high energy mix of breeds and obviously needs the companionship. And he is a baby. Maybe you could crate him in your bedroom with that snugglekitty, smelly shirt, live companion so you are nearby but he's not sleeping on your face. Cats are also active at night.

If he has someone to play with, cuddle with and your house is kitten-proof or you have a kitten-safe room then I would put him out of the BR.

I have a 14 lb cat who sometimes steps all over my head at night and mrrrroooowwwws??? at me. Mom? Are you awake? uhhhh... I am NOW!

 

[bunnelina]

Originally Posted by otto

I apologize to anyone who finds my post offensive.

However I believe when you adopt an animal you take responsibility for the animal and if that means losing sleep to give him the proper attention as he adjusts, well then that's just the way things go. The kitten can't speak up for himself. The kitten should come first.

There may be many other times in a pet's life when she/he will need special care, and the human will lose sleep (or go broke

). Raising the baby could be viewed as a little bit of practice for those other times.

This all should be taken into consideration before adopting a pet.

Okay, so it's too late now, he has adopted the kitten.

So now, what I am saying is, this is the way it is when you have a pet: You are this kittens ONLY world. This baby relies on your for everything, and always will. Get in the habit now, of putting this kitten's needs first in your life. Leaving a kitten to fend for himself for 16 + hours a day/night is just wrong.

Why even have him in the first place?

I totally agree with you, Otto, and you have NEVER been offensive. I tried my best to talk him out of this kitten before he got it — a few of us tried to guide him to an adult or a quiet breed — because I KNEW he'd complain about normal kitten behavior and try to "train" it.

I feel so sorry for this kitten. I can't begin to tell you. You said it perfectly. The only hope is that he gets a second one, so at least it has a playmate when it's alone all day and closed up all night.

I am a bit miffed by the fact that the OP thinks that, because I'm female, it's okay for ME to go without sleep, but HE needs his because HE works 40 hours. For the record, yes, I'm female, and I'm working at least 60 to 70 hours a week. I am in the middle of raising TWO kittens who are big now but still act like babies at 10 months. And I have never shut my four cats out of the bedroom in case they want to be with us at night.

Believe me, I know about sleep deprivation, but I love my cats and they are more important. I generally have a 12-pound "kitten" walking all over me, sticking his nose up mine, and begging to be petted, several times between 3 and 6 in the morning. And I am SO grateful to have him do that!!!!

 

[otto]

Originally Posted by Bunnelina

Believe me, I know about sleep deprivation, but I love my cats and they are more important. I generally have a 12-pound "kitten" walking all over me, sticking his nose up mine, and begging to be petted, several times between 3 and 6 in the morning. And I am SO grateful to have him do that!!!!

Thank you for your support. Yes, when my Bibbs

had her sinus cancer I was up round the clock, every hour, steaming her in the bathroom so she could breathe.

For the last two years of Ootay's

life, she could not go more than three hours without food. I got up every night at 12 m, 3 a.m. and 6 a.m. to give her something to eat.

It's just all part of being a pet owner. I too work about 60 hours a week. Did I get tired? you bet I did. But my cats give me unconditional love and never ending joy.

They deserve any and everything I can do for them.

 

[otto]

I posted this in your other thread, but meant to put it here where it is more relevant.

Hi it's me again

pmantis: In your very first post you say:

Quote:
i dont want a super hypo cat, i want one that likes to play, and dosent lounge around all day being lazy, and that likes petting, as ive known cats that dont like to be pat...

Now, I am not trying to pick on you. I care about your kitten. The thing is, to raise a kitten into a well balanced cat with the above character traits requires time, dedication, effort, and limitless patience.

Keeping your kitten isolated from you at night, after he is alone all day for 8 or 9 hours, he is not going to grow up to be a happy, friendly , sociable, playful cat.

Nor will he be bonded to you.

He will grow up fearful of people (since he never sees any) and most likely unsociable (since he is alone all the time) he may not like being touched (since he doesn't get enough of it in babyhood) He will not know how to play (again, since he is spending so much time in solitary)

Cats make wonderful loving devoted companions. But they don't just automatically become that way. Yes, their nature, what they are born with genetically, is of course important. From the way your kitten clambers on you at night, he is already showing a loving nature. But you have to nurture that loving nature, not shut it down by shutting him out.

Proper upbringing goes a long way toward having a loving feline companion who will curl up on your lap on cold nights, and engage in fun Games with you to make you laugh, for many many years.