I know this may be a lot to ask, but I'm asking anyway in hopes that a few of you will be able to answer:
I'd like others to tell me about their experiences or point me to threads or blogs of others who've lived through the similar experience of dealing with integrating cats. My nerves are as much on edge as my cat's and it's getting to the point where I don't know if I can handle the stress of integrating an only neutered male cat (for seven years who is also very skittish) and a four year old friendly spayed girl, but very much a hissy territorial cat.
Total disclosure: I'm on anti-anxiety meds but it's still difficult and stressful to the maximum for me to have to be on constant high alert in case of a fight. The house just doesn't have the calm, peaceful atmosphere with them both in the same house. It's not that they've drawn blood, but the ever present feeling that I'm waiting for the bomb to drop. It doesn't help that they've had two minor fights in two days and now my male cat is perpetually under a chair he can defend from. He's usually such a mush ball of love.... but he's so on alert it's awful upsetting for me. I know how he feels having the peace of the house upset.
It feels like I'm living in my Dad's house when I was young. I never knew when my step mom would lose it. The atmosphere is the same here and I just hate it.
I am, however, doing this for him as he's going slightly crazy without a friend to keep him company while I work. He goes into a room and cries loudly when I don't have time to spend with him in the evening and then pees. He's peed on the stove, which now needs to be replace, on the kitchen counters and floors and the entryway closet. He NEEEEEEDS a friend, but I"m not sure he will ever have the constitution to handle living with another cat and being friends. (PS he's not peed anywhere since she's been here keeping him distracted... he's only sprayed a few places which he's never done before.)
Please help. How did you deal with the stress? Are there any good stories or advise online you know about?
Sincerely,
Rose, Stressed to the Max
I'd like others to tell me about their experiences or point me to threads or blogs of others who've lived through the similar experience of dealing with integrating cats. My nerves are as much on edge as my cat's and it's getting to the point where I don't know if I can handle the stress of integrating an only neutered male cat (for seven years who is also very skittish) and a four year old friendly spayed girl, but very much a hissy territorial cat.
Total disclosure: I'm on anti-anxiety meds but it's still difficult and stressful to the maximum for me to have to be on constant high alert in case of a fight. The house just doesn't have the calm, peaceful atmosphere with them both in the same house. It's not that they've drawn blood, but the ever present feeling that I'm waiting for the bomb to drop. It doesn't help that they've had two minor fights in two days and now my male cat is perpetually under a chair he can defend from. He's usually such a mush ball of love.... but he's so on alert it's awful upsetting for me. I know how he feels having the peace of the house upset.
It feels like I'm living in my Dad's house when I was young. I never knew when my step mom would lose it. The atmosphere is the same here and I just hate it.
I am, however, doing this for him as he's going slightly crazy without a friend to keep him company while I work. He goes into a room and cries loudly when I don't have time to spend with him in the evening and then pees. He's peed on the stove, which now needs to be replace, on the kitchen counters and floors and the entryway closet. He NEEEEEEDS a friend, but I"m not sure he will ever have the constitution to handle living with another cat and being friends. (PS he's not peed anywhere since she's been here keeping him distracted... he's only sprayed a few places which he's never done before.)
Please help. How did you deal with the stress? Are there any good stories or advise online you know about?
Sincerely,
Rose, Stressed to the Max