oh my gosh I'm so nervous.......

[jugen]

in about two weeks and three days I will be getting married as all of you know, well today I get an email from someone I haven't seen in years telling me they will be at our wedding and are looking forward to meeting Brad....

Now just so you all know, this isn't going to be a traditional wedding, it's going to be the Justice of the peace in the backyard of a friends house, no music nothing like that. just basically "do you?" and "do you?" there you're married and this is done, a 20 minute ceremony and that's all. Now I feel like I should at least have the here comes the bride music stuff and things of that sort if they are going to fly all the way from the East coast for this...It's my uncle that I haven't seen since I was about I'd say 5 or 6 and his wife who I've never met but seems like a great person. I'm so horribly nervous and now an stressing over if everything is going to go right. All of my coworkers told me that they were going to TP my house which Brad will freak if they do and I already told them not to but they aren't listening, they said they they will either do my car or Brads, or the house, and they are threatening to break in and sabotage the bed for us, which isn't a big deal if I know they are going to do it, then I can lock the cats in another room, but they won't tell me if they are going to do ti and that has me terrified that the cats are going to get outside and when I get home, my cats will be gone.mind you these people aren't very smart and will do this even though I tell them not to. I don't want either car decorated and I told them that also, but they wont' listen. God, I am so nervous! what can I do, I want this wedding to be memorable but I dont' want a big fight or any hurt feelings during my reception and I don't want to constantly have to look outside and be checking on my car. I think that sucks. and I amd worried about what the east coast relation will think of my non traditional wedding...
I am so nervous, someone give me some ideas on how to stop the stupid country hicks from making my wedding suck??? and how to make the east coast relations(new York) have a good time in a small town?

 

[ricalynn]

Barb,
REmember what we told you about the rings? DEEP BREATH!!!!! I got winded just reading your post! You must be hyperventilating already.

DO NOT WORRY about what your "fancy" east-coast relations think about the setting of the wedding. This day is about YOU and BRAD, not about showing everyone up. They obviously want to spend this special day with YOU and get to know the new member of the family. Whether it's in a cathedral or a backyard is irrelevant. If they don't like it and are crass enough to say so, I say it's no loss if you don't see them for another twenty years!!

And your co-workers are just trying to get you riled up, which it seems they've succeeded in doing! Ignore them, make sure the kitties are secured, since there will be lots of new folks around, and ENJOY your wedding day and your new husband. It's a wonderful day, but its' still only 24 hours.

Remember, DEEP BREATHS!!!!!!!!!!

 

[KittenKrazy]

I second the "deep breath" part, now, go pet a kitty, it will help too. Can you take your kitties somewhere else where you know that they are safe? Or just go ahead and lock them up where you will have some peace of mind. As for the cars, can you lock them in a garage somewhere? Good luck, and if it does happen, just take pics, you'll laugh about it one day, trust me on this one!

 

[jugen]

I know, but you have to understand, Brad HATES my coworkers, and if anything is out of place then he's going to freak, the most I'm worried about is the cats, if they get into the house and the cats get loose, I'm going to freak! I'd lock them up in the computer room with a note on the door but the hicks would stupidly open the door just TO be stupid. I realy don't want to spend my whole entire night worrying about my cats either ya know? I can't take them with me since Isis and Luna would be stressed beyond years, and I can't leave them at my future MIL's house for the same reason, although it'd make me feel better knowing that they were safe for the night, that's not fair to them.
As far as my east coast relations, I just want them to have a good time, not think they wasted their money to come, ya know? I guess I'm worried because I haven't seen them in so long and I want everything to be what they expect...
I know, I know Breathe...............I'm trying, it's just with everything new that pops up I freak a little more, did all you married people, after awhile(before the wedding), just wish it was over and done???

 

[KittenKrazy]

Hmmm, the day before our wedding, my FIL came down with a BAD stomach bug, didn't know if he was going to be able to make it to the wedding or not......day of the wedding, the majority of my singers were 30 minutes late getting here, then after we got started, on the song just before the wedding march, the singer turned on his tape, it played the introduction to the song and promptly ate his tape......we survived!

 

[jugen]

Originally Posted by KittenKrazy

Hmmm, the day before our wedding, my FIL came down with a BAD stomach bug, didn't know if he was going to be able to make it to the wedding or not......day of the wedding, the majority of my singers were 30 minutes late getting here, then after we got started, on the song just before the wedding march, the singer turned on his tape, it played the introduction to the song and promptly ate his tape......we survived!

Thanks I needed that.......I guess I do know I'll survive, it's just that I'm very nervous and very worried about my cats, the cars and house being sabotaged I can live with but dont mess with the cats, ya know? that is keeping me up at night.....and now the added relations from NY coming, I just want this day to be great......... (Rocket is here headbutting me for pettings, he knows somethings wrong with mom..)

 

[valanhb]

Barb, at the end of the day you and Brad will be married and that's all that really matters. Keep reminding yourself of that!

With the cars....take them to someone else's house (friend, family, parking garage....) so the idiots can't find them. (I've known quite a few people who have done that!) For the co-workers breaking into your house, tell them straight out that if they do Brad will call the cops and they will be charged with breaking and entering and vandalism. (Ask him first if he minds being made out to be the bad guy on that one...) I would still lock the kitties in a room somewhere where you don't think people would look, just in case these people really are idiots. But the threat of jail time would probably deter them from getting into the house anyway. You're still open to being TPed, but of the choices that's not too bad.

Agreed, BREATHE! You'll be fine, you'll get married, and that's what matters. One of the nicest and most fun weddings I've been to was a back yard JOP wedding. It was beautiful and we all had a blast...well, until the bride's father had a minor heart attack during the reception (he recovered, so it didn't totally ruin the day forever).

Your uncle and aunt are coming to see YOU and BRAD, not a big fancy wedding. The wedding is just the reason for them to come, but they could see any ol' wedding on TV if that's what they wanted. It's you that makes the visit important.

 

[pamela]

GOSH!!! that must be very stressful for u!! Hang in there!!

One suggestion.. I don't know if u'd like but I'm suggesting anyway.. Ask police to patrol ur area more often in the last 1-2 days before the wedding so that way ur co workers can't break into ur home? Then u can warn ur co workers and hopefully they will be smart enuff to know not to mess with cops??

I know the feeling about co workers- my co workers have told me a zillion times what they'd do if I EVER hook a guy and get married.. They've threatened to rent a hotel room next to my hotel room, break into my hotel room and decorate it with condoms, etc, buy some UNUSUAL sex toys for my bridal/wedding gifts(which would embarrass me big time in front of my family cuz they're very conservative -just like me!), etc, etc.

I finally told them that if I ever got serious and decided to get married that I wouldn't tell them UNTIL AFTER I got married!!

 

[pamela]

Heidi! We must've posted at the same time AND be sending each other brain waves!

I like Heidi's idea about taking cars to a friend's place, etc..

I would DEFINITELY put the cats in a place SAFE where your idiotic co workers can't get to. Is there a room that's lockable in ur house?

 

[jcat]

Originally Posted by jugen

I know, I know Breathe...............I'm trying, it's just with everything new that pops up I freak a little more, did all you married people, after awhile(before the wedding), just wish it was over and done???

Yes, we kept wondering if we should just elope! Here's a "perfect wedding":

We had a civil ceremony (required here) in the morning, and a church ceremony (insisted on by the in-laws) the same afternoon. The best man, maid of honor and photographer all got stuck in the same traffic jam on the autobahn and arrived over an hour late. That was okay, because the "registrar" had gotten my name wrong (I wanted to keep my maiden name as a middle name, and he gave me a double, i.e., hyphenated, name), and I insisted that the documents be drawn up again. The best man forgot to bring his ID, and somebody else had to take his place.

The church ceremony went well until the priest said, "Do you, Klaus, take this woman......." Gasps all around. My husband's name is Robert; Klaus is my brother-in-law. He was living in the U.S. at the time, and I'd never even met him. The dear Father was a little confused, and after some discussion started over again. After the ceremony, when it came time for the maid of honor and best man to sign as witnesses, the priest had a fit because Lila had never been baptized in any church (I didn't think he'd ask).

The party went on a bit too long, and almost all the guests ended up spending the night, so the only place Robert and I could find to sleep on our wedding night was a "pantry", i.e., storage room, on chaise lounges. Oh, yes, and it rained.

On the bright side, we'll be celebrating our 24th anniversary next month, and nobody involved has forgotten our wedding.

Take several deep breaths, figure that something will go wrong (my sister and brother-in-law had a "perfect wedding", but my b-in-law somehow lost his shoes at the reception- they never turned up), and try to enjoy yourself. You'll get through the day!

 

[pamela]

jcat,

I JUST LAUGHED

reading your story!! Sounds like your wedding day was quite an adventure for u and quite unforgettable!!

 

[jcat]

Originally Posted by Pamela

jcat,

I JUST LAUGHED

reading your story!! Sounds like your wedding day was quite an adventure for u and quite unforgettable!!

Oh, it was. My family thought it was hysterical, especially because I'd always said I didn't want a "wedding", but it took my in-laws a few years to recover from the fiasco.

 

[pamela]

Originally Posted by jcat

Oh, it was. My family thought it was hysterical, especially because I'd always said I didn't want a "wedding", but it took my in-laws a few years to recover from the fiasco.

OHHHHHHHHH!! NEVER say that you don't want something or it WILL happen!!

I have learned that the hard way myself. I said I didn't want to do/have that or this and ended up having to...

 

[weatherlight]

Getting married wasn't a big deal for me. My friend said "I do" and I said "I'll try" (I'm an honest person, ya know?), the judge signed a piece of paper and gave it to us, and then we went home. It cost us $30 total, including the license. Ahh...the memories...

Do call the cops if your coworkers are trespassing, damaging property, etc. You're not defenseless here--the law is on your side.

 

[shell]

Everyone has given you some great advice, but I have one small suggestion. Is there any way you could have a VERY reliable & trustworthy friend who may not mind housesitting your house until you are able to come back? I've had several friends in the past or even trust worthy friends of friends who have done that before. At least if you have someone there, it's less likely they'll break in & try something stupid.

Good luck to you & Brad! Congrats too!

 

[wellingtoncats]

Oh Barb! Big hugs honey! Not long to go now.. I'm so excited for you!

It will be the perfect day of course cos you're with Brad.

Hope the idiots don't try anything though!

 

[cilla]

Barb, as you say the cats are your biggest worry, and I would make sure they are somewhere safe. Get somewhere they can stay for a day or two. Regards everything else the worry of it happening is much more painful than it actually happening. Stop worrying about what others are coming to see. They are coming to see two happy people commit themselves to each other. It will be such a happy time for you. Now that you have gone through all the worse scenarios concentrate on the wonderful things the day will bring for you. So excited for you. Enjoy it.

 

[mom of franz]

Originally Posted by jugen

in about two weeks and three days I will be getting married as all of you know, well today I get an email from someone I haven't seen in years telling me they will be at our wedding and are looking forward to meeting Brad....

Now just so you all know, this isn't going to be a traditional wedding, it's going to be the Justice of the peace in the backyard of a friends house, no music nothing like that. just basically "do you?" and "do you?" there you're married and this is done, a 20 minute ceremony and that's all. Now I feel like I should at least have the here comes the bride music stuff and things of that sort if they are going to fly all the way from the East coast for this...It's my uncle that I haven't seen since I was about I'd say 5 or 6 and his wife who I've never met but seems like a great person. I'm so horribly nervous and now an stressing over if everything is going to go right. All of my coworkers told me that they were going to TP my house which Brad will freak if they do and I already told them not to but they aren't listening, they said they they will either do my car or Brads, or the house, and they are threatening to break in and sabotage the bed for us, which isn't a big deal if I know they are going to do it, then I can lock the cats in another room, but they won't tell me if they are going to do ti and that has me terrified that the cats are going to get outside and when I get home, my cats will be gone.mind you these people aren't very smart and will do this even though I tell them not to. I don't want either car decorated and I told them that also, but they wont' listen. God, I am so nervous! what can I do, I want this wedding to be memorable but I dont' want a big fight or any hurt feelings during my reception and I don't want to constantly have to look outside and be checking on my car. I think that sucks. and I amd worried about what the east coast relation will think of my non traditional wedding...
I am so nervous, someone give me some ideas on how to stop the stupid country hicks from making my wedding suck??? and how to make the east coast relations(new York) have a good time in a small town?

Barb, I'm a New Yorker, and I'm sure your New York relatives are not expecting Tavern on the Green or The Plaza Hotel..remember, these folks more than likely ride the subway. However to make yourself feel better, I would email them and tell them that just like any bride to be, you are nervous as a cat and wanted to warn them that this was a plain Jane affair. I'm sure that they will write back that they are not going for the ribbons and bows, but want to come for YOU! As far as your co-workers..maybe you should get on the phone and CRY your heart out, so they will see how serious you are. I think they are pulling your leg...but you don't needs jokes right now. Good luck!

 

[cla517]

everyone has given very good advice. I promise, you willl survive your wedding day and laugh about it later.

Here's my horror story. I got married about a year ago and during the reception some drunk, crazy woman who was staying in the hotel came into my reception, grabbed the microphone from the DJ and started railing about how her and her family of 6 could not sleep because of all the noise we were making. Well, the wedding coordinators from the hotel and a few of the guests (including my brother) rushed her out of there. She punched one of the wedding coordinators and ended up getting arrested and thrown out of the hotel. (She was staying there alone, the family of 6 thing was a lie. We found out later that the room was totally soundproofed so we were not disturbing anyone)

Anyway, people are still talking about it! Everyone went back to having a really good time and I am certain my wedding was memorable!!!

Hang in there! I had my big melt down the Wednesday before the wedding. It all got to be too much for me and I just started sobbing like a baby in the car with my soon to be husband. At least I felt better afterwards. Is there anyone at work that you could confide in to see if they really plan to do that stuff?

 

[katl8e]

The night before Numbnuts and I got married, the minister had a heart attack. There I was, at 9:30 Saturday night, trying to find an officiant, for 1:30 Sunday afternoon. Meanwhile, Chip (the minister) was trying to check himself out of the hospital, so that he could do the job. Fortunately, Chip had a friend, who was willing to pinch-hit and we pulled it off.

As for decorating your house - shucks! What's a wedding night, without cowbells tied to the bedsprings?