New to caring for a stray/feral and second-guessing myself and need some encouragement and support

[feralvr]

  But the big news is that he has started grooming himself several feet away and today he began rolling on his back about 6-8 feet away from me. He is DEFINITELY male and DEFINITELY not neutered. I had the full view! (How nice for me! :lol3: ) He is, unfortunately, the type to be very skittish of traps so I'm hoping I can win his trust enough that he will go right into a carrier one of these mornings if I put a little tuna in a bowl in one. I'm concerned about him because he seems to be thinner and he is dining with me twice a day. I've added some wet food every now and then when it is just him and not the neighbor's little beggars. Today, I gave him a few small pieces of cold chicken. 

I am keeping up here with your thread!!! :bigthumb: AND that Orville is grooming near you now too!! This is a HUGE sign of trust. How exciting for you and for him, and I am even quite excited over this news! :high5:

I am certain that you will be able to begin feeding him inside that carrier soon. BUT, please be prepared for that to take a few days and a bit of a setback. Actually, what I would recommend is to begin to bring the carrier out there with you when you feed him. Maybe put the food bowl with the yummy wet food near the carrier. Just get him used to seeing it and over a few days move the bowl closer and closer to the front of the carrier. Keep the carrier door propped open all the time. In fact, if you can leave it out there under your porch all the time that would be great. After he is used to eating from his bowl in front of the carrier, then the next day, put the bowl inside of the carrier. Little by little, he will think nothing of it anymore. Once inside, and all the way back, and with you within an arms reach of that door, I think you will have him trapped!! Make sure you wear a GLOVE, please. When you quickly and swiftly shut that door, he will spin and go nuts and the claws may get you while you are trying to latch the door. Just be prepared with a gloved hand. :nod: He will be very, very, very upset but as you know, this is for his own benefit even though he doesn't know it yet.

Keep up the great, amazing work with him. I am in this with you, as you know. :rub:

p.s. It's not all that uncommon for the Tom cats to appear a bit thin during breeding season. Their hormones are on overdrive and once he is neutered, he will have a whole new viewpoint in life, a much more happy and healthy way for him to live!!

 

[chaucer]

I am keeping up here with your thread!!!

AND

that Orville is grooming near you now too!! This is a HUGE sign of trust. How exciting for you and for him, and I am even quite excited over this news!

I am certain that you will be able to begin feeding him inside that carrier soon. BUT, please be prepared for that to take a few days and a bit of a setback. Actually, what I would recommend is to begin to bring the carrier out there with you when you feed him. Maybe put the food bowl with the yummy wet food near the carrier. Just get him used to seeing it and over a few days move the bowl closer and closer to the front of the carrier. Keep the carrier door propped open all the time. In fact, if you can leave it out there under your porch all the time that would be great. After he is used to eating from his bowl in front of the carrier, then the next day, put the bowl inside of the carrier. Little by little, he will think nothing of it anymore. Once inside, and all the way back, and with you within an arms reach of that door, I think you will have him trapped!! Make sure you wear a GLOVE, please. When you quickly and swiftly shut that door, he will spin and go nuts and the claws may get you while you are trying to latch the door. Just be prepared with a gloved hand.

He will be very, very, very upset but as you know, this is for his own benefit even though he doesn't know it yet.

Keep up the great, amazing work with him. I am in this with you, as you know.

p.s. It's not all that uncommon for the Tom cats to appear a bit thin during breeding season. Their hormones are on overdrive and once he is neutered, he will have a whole new viewpoint in life, a much more happy and healthy way for him to live!!

It's funny, but he doesn't seem to be all that interested in mating and he is with two females who are spayed, so it makes me wonder.  I know he has to be Henryetta's littermate. If she didn't have the Tortie markings, they would look similar - like siblings. Same color tabby and they even have the same stripe markings on their upper legs and the same black mark on the same back lower leg. They both have green eyes - her's are lighter- and they are both talkers, much like the neighbors black/orange tortie. Henryetta is very friendly like she is too. So it's most definitely a family connection.

I'm a little concerned that he is losing weight but that may be because the heat index here is around 104-112 right now due to high humidity.  He not only grooms, he blinks at me a lot when I talk to him and he will lie down and sometimes roll showing his white stomach. He came running from the neighbor's (the one with the two females) yard this morning when I called his name.  Actually, he jumped the fence and strolled, but he came. He's getting less afraid and let me tell you, he blinks at Chaucer too.

I sat with Chaucer on my lap again- yes, I know- and Orville went over a ways and decide to lie down and blink!  Chaucer sat on my lap, purring and squirming. Not even bothering about Orville. He just wanted to sniff around the steps, but I have to keep a grip on him. Perhaps he would like a halter and leash so I could take him out, but not when Orville and other cats are out there.

My carrier is wood and wire. It has a wooden door and moderately high wooden sides with the mesh wire going around the upper sides and tops, so I'd be afraid he might reach through the sides or tops. With Henryetta, who was so easy that she just walked in the first time I put it out there with a little tuna inside, I took a blanket and covered the top and sides, and yes, I wore a jacket and gloves, but for her it wasn't necessary even. She just sat in the carrier and looked at me when I pulled aside the blanket for the car trip to the vet. She also was happy to see me when I picked her up and brought her into the house for the first time. She actually plopped on the laundry room's cool floor. If she could have sighed from happiness, she would. I expect, though, that her very friendly attitude was because she was pregnant.

 

[chaucer]

Sorry to be crass, but I got a better look at Orville's backside. He let me sit on the bottom step a little over a foot away (first time) this morning and when he turned, his you-know-whats are nearly flat. They are bigger than Chaucer's but Chaucer is a longer, leaner cat and was neutered as a very young kitten. I think Orville's been neutered, which would explain some things as to the company he keeps and he doesn't look as if he's been in a fight and let's hope that doesn't happen!  His ear is not clipped as would be the case of TNR, unless it just wasn't clipped by the vet when it was done. Whether he is someone's outdoor cat remains to be seen and it is possible he was an abandoned pet but some time ago.  He looks like he should be related to Henryetta, but she wasn't spayed.

 

[feralvr]

Oh :lol3: no need to worry about being offensive when talking kitties rear ends and their "parts"!!! It is quite an important subject especially in this forum! WOW - that would be really, really great if he were in fact already neutered. It is possible, though, that his little nuggets () are not that big?? If he is neutered, then you are right, he was probably abandoned or he got lost somehow. And then more confusing is that if he is Henryetta's sibling, then doubtful that he was already done. Well - hopefully soon enough you will be able to capture him one way or another and get your answer! He is really making giant progress in the trust department with you AND with Chaucer. Sounds like they could one day be friends. :bigwink:

 

[chaucer]

Maybe I'll get a closer look at his little nuggets another time but they looked flat and they had a big black spot that spread out on both in the middle. The rest of the nuggets being a kind of tan. LOL! He has the same Tabby coloring that Henryetta does - black with an almost tan and four white feet with a white undercarriage and green eyes, plus that black mark on the back of his legs.  He may have been in a situation like Henryetta where someone fed him, took care of him as an outdoor cat and had him neutered and let him live outside but moved away and left him behind. The difference being that I'm not moving away and leaving Henryetta to her own devices. When I was considering moving to another home a while back, I was planning to try and catch Orville and take him with us. I didn't want to leave him behind after feeding him for months.

 

[chaucer]

Taken early this morning: This is the first time Orville has ever climbed up the steps!  (I didn't realize how dirty my screen door was until I saw these pictures! )

Chaucer and Orville.jpg

• chaucer
• Jul 1, 2015

Chaucer and Orville1.jpg

• chaucer
• Jul 1, 2015

 

[chaucer]

A joyous moment!   He is on the rug this morning after eating.  I opened the screen to take this picture. He is still there resting AND Henryetta and Chaucer have been at the door from time-to-time. There is no threatening behavior from any of them.  Orville blinks a lot.  I may eventually be able to get him into a carrier like I did with Henryetta.

Orville 2.jpg

• chaucer
• Jul 3, 2015

 

[feralvr]

A joyous moment!   He is on the rug this morning after eating.  I opened the screen to take this picture. He is still there resting AND Henryetta and Chaucer have been at the door from time-to-time. There is no threatening behavior from any of them.  Orville blinks a lot.  I may eventually be able to get him into a carrier like I did with Henryetta.

Orville 2.jpg

• chaucer
• Jul 3, 2015

I am totally BOWLED over here. LOOK at his calm, sweet, adorable face???!!!! SEE what comes after many, many agonizing days trying to befriend them? It can take what seems like forever, but then one day; there they are right at your front door. A gift of love for all of your love and trust. And, you know what strikes me is that he has no Tom cat jowls. As the Tom's age, their jowls become quite large. So who knows... is he already neutered? He certainly doesn't act like a full blown tom. :dk: What a BEAUTIFUL BOY!!!! This is a great picture of him. I think he has chosen you and your kitty family - no going back now. My heart is telling me he has found his home. :heart3: Either inside or outside.................. no pressure, you know. :lol3: Your doing such a great job with him. This may be dumb to say - but I am very proud of your efforts and have great respect for your big heart and compassion to help these guys.

 

[feralvr]

Chaucer and Orville1.jpg

• chaucer
• Jul 1, 2015

AND THIS ONE .... Oh my goodness. Chaucer is looking down at an ALIEN..... :lol3:

 

[chaucer]

I am totally BOWLED over here.

LOOK at his calm, sweet, adorable face???!!!! SEE what comes after many, many agonizing days trying to befriend them? It can take what seems like forever, but then one day; there they are right at your front door. A gift of love for all of your love and trust. And, you know what strikes me is that he has no Tom cat jowls. As the Tom's age, their jowls become quite large. So who knows... is he already neutered? He certainly doesn't act like a full blown tom.

What a BEAUTIFUL BOY!!!! This is a great picture of him. I think he has chosen you and your kitty family - no going back now.

My heart is telling me he has found his home.

Either inside or outside.................. no pressure, you know.

Your doing such a great job with him. This may be dumb to say - but I am very proud of your efforts and have great respect for your big heart and compassion to help these guys.

Thank you so much for your kind words.  I appreciate them. Most people I know think I'm nuts to feed yet another cat and consider him for a pet and try to discourage me from getting too involved, telling me "You don't need another cat."   I don't think an indoor cat is the answer for me, but I can have an outdoor one who can come in if he needs shelter or live in my storage room once it is cat-proofed again.

The roast chicken is helping him overcome some of his fear, but I still see fear in his eyes if I get too close or make a sudden movement.  He's taking longer than Henryetta but he's been on his own longer. It's been 1.5 years since I started feeding Henryetta after the people across the street left and he isn't pregnant and needing help,  but I can see he has a rather friendly personality if he would just trust me. He likes when I talk to him and answers me. He also knows his name. 

There is another picture of him in this thread that shows a bigger face, but it may be because it was in the winter and he was fluffier. We had a couple of male Siamese when I was a child. They were intact, at least for a few years, and I remember them coming in all beat-up from fights and my mother doctoring their ears, etc. Orville doesn't seem to have scars on his ears from fighting. I can see that when he is about a foot from me, and as I've said before, he hangs around with my neighbor's two spayed females.  I really don't know if he is Henryetta's littermate because he may be younger. He may be one of her kittens that survived a couple of years ago. He doesn't look "old," but neither does she and the vet said she is "early middle-age" - 4 o 5 now.

I don't do a third of what you and others do for ferals and strays.  You guys are great!  I'm still learning and I'm learning from you what I need to do.

 

[chaucer]

He greets me now with meows, as usual, but now his tail is almost up and it is waving. I held out the mug I use to pour out his food and he came up to it and sniffed it. He also ate about 8 inches from me.  I could see in his ears and they are clean and he has no scars on his ears, but he does, however have a bite wound on the side of his neck where cats bite each other during fights. It does not look infected but it concerns me in terms of FIV. 

 

[feralvr]

He greets me now with meows, as usual, but now his tail is almost up and it is waving. I held out the mug I use to pour out his food and he came up to it and sniffed it. He also ate about 8 inches from me.  I could see in his ears and they are clean and he has no scars on his ears, but he does, however have a bite wound on the side of his neck where cats bite each other during fights. It does not look infected but it concerns me in terms of FIV. 

Excellent and HUGE HUGE progress!! I wonder if you could begin feeding him inside of a carrier/small crate? I know we talked about this so forgive me if I am repeating myself. :doh3: Maybe bring it outside to get him used to seeing it. Leave it out there with a bed inside. :dk:

And, yes, a worry about FIV with a bite wound. Although, it has to be very deep and sometimes will abscess. I am thrilled that he came so close that you could inspect him visually this way. Great to hear his ears look so healthy! Even if, let's say, he came down with FIV, it is not a death sentence by any means and can only be transferred by inflicting a very deep bite wound. Anyway - we won't know for sure until the time you are able to eventually capture him and get him to the vet. Hopefully that wound is superficial and will heal quickly. :cross:

 

[chaucer]

Excellent and HUGE HUGE progress!!

I wonder if you could begin feeding him inside of a carrier/small crate? I know we talked about this so forgive me if I am repeating myself.

Maybe bring it outside to get him used to seeing it. Leave it out there with a bed inside.

And, yes, a worry about FIV with a bite wound. Although, it has to be very deep and sometimes will abscess. I am thrilled that he came so close that you could inspect him visually this way. Great to hear his ears look so healthy! Even if, let's say, he came down with FIV, it is not a death sentence by any means and can only be transferred by inflicting a very deep bite wound. Anyway - we won't know for sure until the time you are able to eventually capture him and get him to the vet. Hopefully that wound is superficial and will heal quickly.

Since Orville shows up between 5:30-6:00 each morning and there is a family of raccoons - 7 of them - who come by to eat up the cat food, I can't leave a carrier or trap out over night.  I have had to stop feeding cats at night, thanks to the raccoons. They've gotten wise that I've moved up the food to 4:00 PM or so and will show up shortly after I put it out! Orville no longer gets evening meals from me.

Yesterday, Orville was rolling around on the carport several feet away. He reached out and touched a small rock that had come from the landscaping nearby and started to play with it.  I went in the house, got a mini-mouse toy and put it a little ways from him. He went over to it, sniffed it and started PLAYING with it!  He batted, chased, tossed it in the air and jumped around with it!  All with me sitting on the lower step watching him.

Today, he got within inches of me, almost close enough to sniff my hand.  He also started rolling around about two feet from me. This is how it worked with Henryetta, although much quicker. I am hoping that he will eventually just walk into a carrier if I put some wet food in it like she did.

Thank you again for your encouragement!  Most people think I'm nuts and "don't need another cat!"

 

[franny1949]

Hi - I'm no computer expert, so I hope this message gets added to the thread.

In the hot weather in Philadelphia, for several years now, I've been dealing with ants, flies, slugs and waterbugs around or in the feral cats' food bowls.   I went online and found Carter's Outdoor Pet Feeder.   This unit works pretty well and, including shipping , cost me about $48.00.    Looks like one of those plastic storage totes and has a "lock on" removable lid - it's been designed to include a removable plastic food bowl (an order for one unit includes two food bowls).   It has an opening with a mesh screen over it, and the cats just stick their heads in and eat.   Food stays dry (even torrential rain doesn't get into this feeder); at first, I noticed flies in it - instructions suggest insect repellent spray on bottom and let it dry,   I don't like using harmful chemicals, so I did some research online for natural/organic fly repellents - bingo ! -   I squirt a little Pine Sol on the bottom of the feeder, along with some hydrogen peroxide.   Dilute with approx. 3 cups of water, swish around.     I put 4 1/2 cups of dry food in the dish, and the unit seems to remain almost insect free.    At night, I put out their wet food in regular bowls on the cement  and it's all gone in the mornings (this is cause there are no flies at night).    I put the cat feeder underneath our truck to keep it out of direct sunlight, as the instructions indicate.   Every two to three days,, I bring the entire unit inside and give it a wash off in my kitchen sink with the sprayer, then add new solution in the bottom.   I am so glad I can provide these poor cats with a clean environment in which to eat dry, fresh, insect free food.  

Hope this is helpful !

PS - Three new cats have joined my feral colony.    Two of the striped tabbies are gone now - my neighbor saw one get hit by a car (so sad), and I don't know what became of the other.   The new ones are a very large black tuxedo cat; an all grey Russian Blue, and now,  since a week ago, an orange tabby.   I will call Forgotten Cats to help me trap and neuter the new ones. 

 

[feralvr]

Today, he got within inches of me, almost close enough to sniff my hand.  He also started rolling around about two feet from me. This is how it worked with Henryetta, although much quicker. I am hoping that he will eventually just walk into a carrier if I put some wet food in it like she did.

This is incredible and the excitement is building day by day. Want to address my idea about the crate! I don't mean leaving it out all night long. Just during the day while you are sitting out there to get Orville used to it. If it is not too much trouble or too heavy, bring it out with you each day and set it down and then go back inside for the YUM-YUMS!! Soon Orville will associate the crate with good tasty treats. Start feeding him treats and food near the crate, once he accepts that step easily, then drop some treats inside the crate or place the bowl just inside the crate door. You can even put that little toy mouse just inside the crate door!! Little by little he will become desensitized by it and come to relate the crate with treats and food! I know all about those little hooligan raccoons! They are fearless and very, very pushy.

p.s. That is SOOO cool that he was playing with that toy mouse.

 

[chaucer]

Thank you for the information, franny1949. I appreciate it.

I'll have to try that, Lauren. The raccoons are cute but they are nuisances.

Today, the little blue and white mini-mouse was missing.

 

[chaucer]

Orville trotted up the back steps and looked in (from a slight distance) today while I was out in the yard. Neither Orville, Chaucer nor Henryetta growled or acted threatening toward each other.    He's become territorial with the neighbor's cats now. He wants to run them off or at least just a little ways off. I take it he is claiming his spot now. I wish he wasn't skittish with me. He will run a little ways off if I get too close, which can be less than a foot or 8 ft, depending on his mood.

He does, though, lie down and roll around a few feet from me, grooms himself and blinks a lot when I talk to him, and he will answer me, too, so I take all of this to be a good sign that he likes me and isn't bothered with my two cats.

 

[feralvr]

Orville trotted up the back steps and looked in (from a slight distance) today while I was out in the yard. Neither Orville, Chaucer nor Henryetta growled or acted threatening toward each other.    He's become territorial with the neighbor's cats now. He wants to run them off or at least just a little ways off. I take it he is claiming his spot now. I wish he wasn't skittish with me. He will run a little ways off if I get too close, which can be less than a foot or 8 ft, depending on his mood.

He does, though, lie down and roll around a few feet from me, grooms himself and blinks a lot when I talk to him, and he will answer me, too, so I take all of this to be a good sign that he likes me and isn't bothered with my two cats.

Your post above made my day!! I am so happy to hear that Orville is chasing off the other cats now! He has found his new home/territory and is showing you how much he loves you. :heart3: I have to admit I sighed a little bit when you commented about not wanting him to be so skittish around you because I understand that little bit of frustration too wanting things to progress along to that stage. :lol3: But, LOOK how long it has taken him to finally come around this far. It could potentially take that long and longer for him to even allow you to touch his head or for him to sniff your finger. Keep up with your great patient outlook and things will happen according to Orville's clock, not your clock. With cats, there is no time limit for anything - day or night - it is all the same to them. One thing you could begin to do is heat up some grilled, stinky yummy chicken. Try offering him these pieces from you hand or toss them a foot in front of you and sit there till he comes to take it. His meows to you, his blinks, rolling on the ground and protecting the territory are all HUGE GIANT gestures on his part. I am sure someday you will be writing and jumping for joy that you have touched Orville. :high5: It is bound to happen.......

 

[chaucer]

I touched his nose with the spoon that I'd used to put out  a little wet food (flaked tuna) for him  that my two didn't eat right away. He jumped back when he touched the spoon, but it was only a few inches from my hand. If he is in the immediate area, he will come running if I call his name. If the neighbor's two cats would just stay away in the morning it would help. One, in particular, is affectionate and will follow me around, but she also hisses and growls at my two behind the screen door. She and the other one will hiss at Orville. Sometimes he will run at the neighbor's two and they will run off. I would like for him to show a little affection, but understand that all cats are different and he is not in heat, nor pregnant like Henryetta was. She was very friendly at these stages but the need for help with her kittens may have made her a little more affectionate and willing to get closer to me, particularly when pregnant and the birth was just a month away.

I worry about Orville.  He sometimes has a hurt foot but I think that has to do with jumping fences. These are chain link ones with those little spiky things at the top. He had a scratch on his leg the other day that I think may have come from those and he has had a straight cut on the top of his paw that looks more like he cut it going through glass that something another cat would would do (ditto for the scratch on his leg).

Orville has had some cold roast chicken before that I've put out for him. He didn't seem to mind that it was flavored with a cajun/barbecue mixed sauce I'd made. 

 I tossed some to him, too and he would go to that spot and eat it. I'm doing that with some cat treats now too. I feel he likes me and trusts me to some extent. I just hope that if he ever really does need help that he will come to me like Henryetta did. 

The carrier sat out there one morning for him with some wet beef-food leading to it, and even on a paper towel inside it. He didn't go for the carrier area at all. I eventually had to clean up the mess since he hadn't eaten anything but what was far away from the carrier. 

 

[feralvr]

I touched his nose with the spoon that I'd used to put out  a little wet food (flaked tuna) for him  that my two didn't eat right away. He jumped back when he touched the spoon, but it was only a few inches from my hand.


The carrier sat out there one morning for him with some wet beef-food leading to it, and even on a paper towel inside it. He didn't go for the carrier area at all. I eventually had to clean up the mess since he hadn't eaten anything but what was far away from the carrier. 

:lol3: That spoon is just an extension of your hand! Everyday, little by little, these small BUT MIGHTY steps forward are going to happen. Just keep up with that carrier - everyday. You don't have to make a trail leading to the carrier so more clean-up for you. Just place it out there during the day and move his bowl a little closer each day. If you bring it out everyday when you call him, he will begin to become desensitized by it and not worry and think "WHAT IS THAT!!!" I have used this method for years before I ever even had a Hav-a-hart trap. It does take a bit longer but can be so much less stressful on the stray/feral cat. I always just carried out that crate and the cats got so used to seeing it that it became a part of ME. :lol3:



p.s. I know it is hard (impossible) to worry about them especially when they show up with a new scratch, cut, wound or limping. I find they are really resilient though and bounce back from almost anything. I hope that is foot does not become extremely sore again like last time. :cross: