I just cannot cope with this pain, i cant stop thinking what i did wrong?? i ran to doctors, i still dont know what was the fatal thing, could have been aids, leucemia or kidney failure, it does not matter anymore, it all started as a bad bad nightmare on christmas eve, when we fixed a urinary blockage. now that he is not here with me, maybe it was my fault by doing something wrong or maybe the rural vet administrating wrong medicine. he suffered because i did not wanted to let him go, i rushed him to the hospital and we gave him oxygen and the vets there tried to bring him back but they could not. we burried him yesterday and is just too hard. I try to sleep and the time that i lie there i just think of who to blame i see his pictures and just want to hit myself for not being able to save him.
Is he mad at me? did i make him suffer a lot just to avoid me being in the pain of loosing him? I cant stop thinking about him. he was ok and then everything went wrong in every possible way.
What do you do when you pain so much? how do you take off your mind all the bad thoughts and how can i stop blaming myself.
Please please give me a word of advice.
Is he mad at me? did i make him suffer a lot just to avoid me being in the pain of loosing him? I cant stop thinking about him. he was ok and then everything went wrong in every possible way.
What do you do when you pain so much? how do you take off your mind all the bad thoughts and how can i stop blaming myself.
Please please give me a word of advice.