Jan. 22--answer Your Cat's Questions Day

[betsygee]

Today is Answer Your Cat's Questions Day. If your cat could ask you a question, what would it be? Mine would ask "Why isn't my food bowl full 24/7?"

 

[nansiludie]

Mine would be, where do you keep the catnip?

Its kept in a jar which is kept in a closed, latched drawer.

 

[rubysmama]

Ruby's would be "Why do you freak out when I decide to sharpen my claws on the sofa?"

 

[Merlin77]

My cats would ask:

"How come we aren't allowed to climb on the counters and go on top of the fridge? What about knocking over the microwave and ripping up the couch? Why can't we have food all the time? Why can't we go in the sink? Please can we go in the fridge? What about the dishwasher? We love touching all the clean plates! How come you don't like it when we put our butts in your faces?"

My answers:

1. You guys cannot put your dirty little paws on the kitchen counters. End of story
2. We don't want you on top of the fridge because that is were we keep the paper towels. You will rip up the paper towels if left unattended.
3. You cannot knock over the microwave because it is expensive.
4. We like our couch, because it is new. You have an entire forest of trees outside to scratch.
5. If you don't like the fact you don't get food all the time, go and hunt mice.
6. You can't go in the sink because you will lick the dirty knives and cut your tongues.
7. We keep our food in the fridge--keep your dirty paws out of there!
8. We eat off of the plates in that dishwasher. So please don't go in.
9. We do not appreciate have tiny little butts waving around right in front of our eyes and noses. Personal space please!!

Conclusion: If you feel the urge to scratch, bite, hunt, play tag, climb or practice ninja skills, go outside in the forest. And keep your butts to yourself.

Of course these are natural cat things, but they have an entire week to do all of it outside before we come over to visit for the weekend. Inside manners, any-cat?

This is an awesome idea, by the way.

 

[betsygee]

"Inside manners" I don't think any cat knows what that means.

 

[abyeb]

Charlie: What’s that thing with the fluffy tail that hangs out in the backyard eating nuts?
Me: You mean a squirrel?
Charlie: Yeah! A squirrel! Can you invite him inside?

Charlie watching something intently...

It’s a squirrel!

 

[1CatOverTheLine]

.
Bob: "Why bowls are so tiny?"

 

[neely]

There's no doubt in my mind what question Carleton would ask, "why do you have to leave the house, can't you stay home with me all day?"

 

[Kreatorcat]

Jack would ask "Did you bring shrimp? You better have brought shrimp!"

But in reality,he consistently asks "Are you coming to bed? Please come to bed. I wanna lay down,but want you to come lay down first so I can lay down with you." Kim says it's the sweetest thing ever when Jack starts meowing for a bedmate.

 

[Mother Dragon]

Chocolate would ask two questions. "Why is Darwin allowed in this house?" and "Why don't you put out all the bags of treats at once and let me pick through them at my leisure?"

Darwin would want to know why we won't let him have Chocolate as his chase and chew toy.

Velcro would whine for opposable thumbs so he wouldn't have to ask us to open the window and let him slaughter the squirrels/birds/imaginary creatures outside.

I would ask, "Why me?"

 

[betsygee]

Well at least there's no existential angst in these cats of ours, their life questions are pretty practical so far.

 

[Lari]

I'm not sure of all she would ask, but I'm pretty sure "why do you groom yourself with water instead of your tongue like a civilized creature?" would probably be in there.

 

[raysmyheart]

Chocolate would ask two questions. "Why is Darwin allowed in this house?" and "Why don't you put out all the bags of treats at once and let me pick through them at my leisure?"

Darwin would want to know why we won't let him have Chocolate as his chase and chew toy.

Velcro would whine for opposable thumbs so he wouldn't have to ask us to open the window and let him slaughter the squirrels/birds/imaginary creatures outside.

I would ask, "Why me?"

 

[raysmyheart]

Speedy would ask, "Will we always stay together"?

 

[jcat]

Food-obsessed Mowgli would ask, "Why do you make me starve all the time?"

 

[blueyedgirl5946]

Food-obsessed Mowgli would ask, "Why do you make me starve all the time?"

Snoop would be standing there with Mowgli asking the same question. Then he would want to know why his bed is not in the house.

 

[Brian007]

Dudley would ask, "why do you insist on giving me soft cushions to sit on, where are all the lumpy, hard bricks?"


And Parker, "why do you lock the door when you have a candle lit bath, you're gone for AGES, and I want to dance precariously on the edge whilst dangling my tail over an unguarded flame?"

 

[cassiopea]

"What's the funny dot on your mystery square that you sit in front of? It is so fun to chase!"

"What's up with you doing your business in that white bowl thing in the tiny room?"


And of course, prior to the ladies getting spayed



"Where on earth is my LOOOOOVEEEEEERR? I require a passionate rendezvous in my boudoir!"



1) It is an electronic connection that let's me click on things on a device called a computer. It is a very different type of mouse.

2) It is the human equivalent of a litter box. And can I please get some privacy during...?

3) No boys! Do you want to end up on Maury Povich and demand kitten support?

 

[Winchester]

Ms. Pepe: Why in the name of all that's holy do you let that blasted dog sleep on my couch? Why? Why? Why?

Mollipop: Seriously? What were you thinking when you brought that blond bimbo (Muffin) into my house?

Muffin: Will you please keep the mackerel witch (Mollipop) out of my face?

Tabby: Whaddya mean, we're out of Frosted Mini Wheats??

Amber Louise: Is it time for breakfast yet? Lunch? When's supper? How about a snack?

Answers:

Because when we're at work, the Beast pretty much sleeps where she wants.

It's been six years since she came into the house. Deal with it.

It's been six years since you came into the house. Deal with it.

Oh, stop. It's not the end of the world. We're going to the grocery store and I'll buy you a box of Frosted Mini Wheats. Chill. (And yes, Tabby really does get her own box of Frosted Mini Wheats.)

You just ate two minutes ago.

And finally, the Beast, who screams bloody murder: There are Way, WAy, WAY too many cats in this house!

 

[Kreatorcat]

Today Pepe and Jack are asking kitty-mama "When did these new toy mice show up? They chirp and make me wanna play!!!". (I love Amazon prime!)