How do you pick a cat?

[Biomehanika]

When adopting a new kitty friend, how do you pick? What qualities do you look for, or what is something a potential adoptee does that makes you go “this is the one”? Is there anything in particular that made you want your current cat?

Are you a “the cat picks you” kind of person, or do you tend to gravitate towards giving the more overlooked kitties who are having a tougher time getting adopted a chance?

For me…
Bentley (RIP) was a mix. I could barely even see the little guy because he was scared and hiding in a box, but when I put my hand in he grabbed it and started purring and licking it immediately, I had to have him! He turned out to be the sweetest boy ever and we spent 13 happy years together before he passed at around 15-16 years old.

Bitsy totally picked me. I went to the adoption centre intending to meet and adopt her brother. He was bouncing off the walls playing and not only totally ignored me but didn’t even seem to acknowledge I existed. While I desperately tried to get his attention, hold him, something, Bitsy kept trying to crawl out to me. I think I put her back in the cage two or three times before she crawled out to me again and I succumbed to her demands of cuddles, and I ended up spending all my time there with her. She was so sweet, I obviously ended up adopting her instead.

Moose I got from a cat lounge in late December. Already having two bonded seniors at home and not wanting to disturb the perfect balance, I wasn’t planning to adopt a cat at the time, I just wanted to hang out with all the kitties! I spent time with a ton of different cats there but Moose stayed away from everyone. He basically just sat at the top of a wall climber they had, observing the action. He was nervous of people and only really there because he loves other cats. I spoke at length with a woman who worked with the rescue that brought in the cats there about my cats, and she said that if I *was* looking to adopt, Moose sounded like he would be a really good fit, and she told me all about him. He was 8 months old and had been there for 5 months! He was constantly overlooked because he was so shy and didn’t approach people for lovings like the other cats there did. I felt so bad for him! I went home and spent the entire night thinking about the little guy, and then returned the next day to put my application for him in. He hid from me the first two days he was here, and then abruptly came out of his shell and became a cuddle machine. He is a very sweet baby now that he trusts me, and I’m so happy I took a chance on him.

 

[Margot Lane]

Oh I think they definitely pick you. You might not even know it but they do.

 

[neely]

I go with my gut so to speak. It's instinct and if the cat comes over to sit in my lap while purring I'm sold. If he or she has a hard luck story, e.g. rough start in life, then I want to give them a forever home. I try to not go to the shelter with my mind set on a specific color, breed or even age. One of the very first cats we adopted was at a shelter in an old Victorian house. He greeted me as soon as I walked in the door and proceeded to follow me from room to room. I told my husband I had to look at all the cats before making up my mind. Can you guess which cat I chose or should I say which cat chose me?

 

[Tik cat's mum]

Patches was chosen when a friend of my sister in law's cat had kittens. I saw a picture and said I'll take that one, was going to bring his litter mate with him but they had decided to keep him. My brigde boy Tik hubby got for me. Then fate played a role in my last two cat's. Bandit was spotted playing outside in a neighbour's yard. My hubby felt sorry for him and asked the neighbour about the kitten he said he was looking for homes for a litter one of his females had had. That day we got a house panther. The most recent kitten Lucky was at my vet's office he'd been taken and surrendered with a broken elbow. Luckily hence the name we had been discussing getting cat number 3, and checking online rescues for a match with the boy's. I had taken the 2 I had for their vaccinations and the vet was telling me about the lovely boy who had been handed to them. The vet took me to see him and told me what care he'd need.I fostered him for a week then he was part of the family.

 

[Alldara]

"My" first cat Beeps was gifted to me. Really my grandmother took care of him though. I was 4. My aunt and uncle found him in the snow up north. He had damage to his vocal cords from the cold. Hence Beeps.

Nobel, I wanted to take a cat to college with me and my mum wouldn't let me take Sweetie with me. (Old cat that decided to get in my mum's car while her boyfriend was in an appointment so we took her home and put found signs and ended up with a cat.) She was quite old and just wanted to sit on your lap. She would stay on the top bunk beds and if you passed her twice without patting her she would cuff you upside the head (no claws).
My cousins had found a cat dumped in the woods. Turns out she was pregnant. My Gramma said I could have a kitten to take with me to college. I asked for a boy as they were less expensive to neuter and I only had a part time job. He was the only boy born and the only shorthaired cat in the litter. Him and 4 orange girls. Be default he was mine!

Once I moved out of my first apartment, Nobel was an only pet. He was lonely. I posted a Kijiji ad looking for a 1 yr old fixed cat. Enter Lily. I never met her before I adopted her.

After Lily passed, we would find Nobel at the door during our daily walk. It was so sad. He would be curled against it and pressed into it. We looked for a young cat who was experienced with seniors. Magnus was in a foster home with an older cat. We never met him before I adopted him. He loved us instantly.

Calcifer we had to look for a unicorn of a cat. One that had been tested for FIV and FeLV. And also one that had lived in a home with an older cat. His foster had a grumpy older resident cat. We talked to her and she decided Calcifer would be the best fit. It's who we asked for and she thinks we were correct from the descriptions posted online. We didn't meet him until his foster dropped him off.

We weren't planning on adopting a third cat again. We went to a pet store we don't normally go to. I like to peek at the cats. It's fun to play with the kittens through the glass. There was an est. 2 yr old cat and he pawed at the glass like he was digging to me. Usually when we asked about a cat, we were told we couldn't meet them until we make an application. That would end the adoption thoughts. This volunteer said, "sure come in." Ghost didn't just win me over, but my wife AND our friend who went from, "You're not getting a third cat." To "If you don't adopt him, I have to and my cat will murder him and me." Then the unicorn moment: he had been FIv and FeLV tested. We usually didn't have a ride either but had gone running errands with a friend with a car; we had a ride home. The stars aligned for Ghost in a way that makes you believe in fate.

 

[VAMama]

The story of how we adopted Cosette...

Ten years ago I found a cat on the side of the road. His owner had dumped him there. Took him to the shelter, did the whole process, adopted him. His long hair caused allergies for some in the family. Also he had many trauma issues from the abandonment. Many problems he never outgrew. His cascading decline took his life at age five. That was 2016.

An expensive and traumatizing experience that hubby didn't want to relive. It took him six years to even consider another pet. Finally in late '22 he agreed on a cat. To eliminate some of our problems with the boy, we had a list of requirements.

1. Short hair, allergy friendly
2. Female (wouldn't develop the specific condition that killed our boy)
3. Petite size so I can handle her myself
4. Quiet and self-sufficient
5. Young enough for many years together
6. Bonus: gray color (I randomly felt like I wanted it)

We got our tax refund around February 1 and agreed to use the cash for adoption/startup. Went to the city shelter that weekend, and there she was. Short hair female, petite, quiet, young, and gray. She was very depressed from being abused in childhood. She showed no playfulness or interest in socializing. After six months in the shelter, she was no closer to adoption, and they were ready to put her down. They offered to give her away for free to anyone who wanted her.

Shelter staff brought me to her. Hiding in a corner under a blanket. I lay down next to her and let her study my face for a while. She sensed I was different from the other customers. She stared at me with curious eyes. I built up to touching her. She let me touch her (a little) with no hissing. Shelter staff was amazed. No customer had gotten that far with her in six months. I swear she understood I was her only chance out of there.

Shelter staff said it was a miracle. If we'd waited one more week she may have died. After six months of failure, she was on the brink of death, and we came waltzing in from nowhere. She is Cosette, our sad little orphan girl, whisked away by a kind stranger.

Cosette quietly abides in a spare bedroom. She requires minimal attention. No allergy flare-up. Everyone loves her.

And that's the story of the wishlist that saved an unwanted cat.

 

[klunick]

We have never actively sought out any of our cats. First one came with the house. She was around when it was being built and once we moved in, she decided she was moving in too. Literally ran into the house when I opened the door to leave. Had to shoo her back outside until I could get her checked out by the vet. Surprisingly, she was fixed and didn't have fleas.

Next two were found in the woods behind a coworker of my husband's house. We took two but she ended up keeping the rest because she couldn't find other homes for them.

Current two were found in a barn by someone's relative who posts on a community forum I belong to. I was posting about the recent death of our cats within months of each other. She pm'd me and said her aunt had a litter of kittens looking for homes. Youngest and I went to look at them and picked two.

 

[Kris107]

When I was younger, I always liked the runts. After that, it sounds terrible, but it has kind of been looks? I wanted a cat with a pink nose. Then ne of my first fosters was a cross eyed seal point that I couldn't let go. Then I definitely wanted another pointed cat so found a flame point. Husband wanted a black cat. I've fostered a lot and always felt like if it was the right cat I wouldn't be able to let him/her go. I do believe that they somehow end up in the right places.

 

[Antonio65]

In my case, the fate always picked them for me.
I always stumbled upon them. I wasn't looking for them, they weren't looking for me. Our paths crossed, the rest is history

 

[neely]

She is Cosette, our sad little orphan girl, whisked away by a kind stranger.

I absolutely love her name, Cosette. It was definitely fate and I have a hunch she will give you many long years of unconditional love.

 

[vansX2]

I did my homework . I looked at breeds that I had interest in. I read up about each breed. Especially their strong and week points health wise. I researched Breeders here in the U.S. I decided that I wanted a kitten from a reputable Breeder whom belonged to ACFA, CFA or TICA. I contacted prospective Breeders asking for information that they didn't have Posted online. I asked about availability , Price, Shots , Veterinarian Checks, Contract and shipping arrangements . In Miles case he was a 10 month old kitten . He was the only one available. I paid 1/2 price for him as he was a older kitten. For Jackpot I sent a deposit of 1/2 his total cost, to have him reserved. As his litter had just been born. Jackpot was 3 months old when I received him. Shipping cost was the same for each kitten.

 

[Caspers Human]

When I was a kid, my father raised hunting dogs. One of the things I learned is that, when you meet a litter of puppies, different ones will approach a new human in different ways. Some of them will be curious and come to greet the new human. Others will be skittish and keep their distance. Most of them will be in the middle and will wait until others greet the human before approaching.

The ones that approach first are more confident and likely to be more dominant when they grow up. The ones that are skittish are the least confident and more likely to be submissive. Again, the ones in the middle of the pack will have more moderate personalities when they mature.

When picking out a puppy from a litter, I was taught to take the second or third one to approach. With hunting dogs, you usually want a confident dog but not one that's too dominant because they can be harder to train. You also don't want the most submissive dog because they won't hunt in the woods with confidence.

In picking out a cat, I would generally follow that advice. Pick the second or third kitten that comes to greet the new human. You want a cat that's not going to be skittish or afraid of people but you also don't want one that's going to be harder to manage when it grows up.

Of course, if you just fall in love with one, that's the kitten or puppy you should take. If the kitten picks you as its new human, it would be a shame to turn it away!

Still, if you want objective advice on picking a new pet, watch how they behave around their litter mates and take the one that shows characteristics that you like. Maybe you'll want a quiet kitty who lays with you on the sofa. Maybe you'll want an active cat that likes to wrestle and play. You can't always tell from how they behave as a kitten but you can, often, get a good idea.

Bottom line: It's good to decide on a new cat by how they interact with their litter mates but, to be honest, there is usually one you fall in love with most.

If you find "The One" that's the kitten you should take home!

 

[Lennybells]

At the time we got our kitten, we weren’t even looking for a cat. We just started talking to my grandma about her cats, and ended up doing research about breeds (we have allergies). The Siberian stood out because of the personality, and we found our eventual cat on Kijiji. This was within like 2 days (a bit rushed, but so worth it). We cuddled with him a bit before officially adopting him, and he was just the sweetest little thing, and he still is.

 

[catloverfromwayback]

Phoebe chose us. I wasn't looking for a kitten, or a grey cat, but she was all over us at the shelter and when Mum went into the enclosure to sit down in a chair in there, Phoebe immediately got onto her lap and started having a bath! I went to look at other cats, didn't see any who really appealed, came back and she was still curled up there. Decision made.

With Daisy, it was a tiny shelter (only one where we lived then) and she was the only cat listed as being suitable to live with other cats. Since I was adopting because Phoebe was lonely for feline company after Maddie died, again, the decision was made for me.

Previous cats have either come to us by being dumped or abandoned (Sheba, Cindy, Abbey, Thomas, Hadji) or I've chosen them for their markings at shelters (Mamie, Magnus, Katie, Freya, Maddie).

 

[Pocket310]

I have literally never owned a cat, I have been researching for years though and have baby-sat, visited friends with cats, been to cat shows and bonded with a cat in the pet-shop but he was adopted 5 days later.

recently I went to a friend who had not gotten her cats neutered and had a lot of kittens in her front yard. They offered that I could take anyone I like. Which I can’t because I am living with my parents and my dad’s allergic.
I had brought some cat food and sat down and fed the cats.
I reached out a lot of times to see if any would accept touch. Very few did, they’d either flinch away or duck away. But there was a little torbie who let me pat her.
I went back the next day and fed the cats, once again the torbie was there and there was a little orange kitten with marbled markings who would duck away from touch.
The next day and the torbie who we had named Pocket was not there but the orange kitten, who we had named Tiger. Was
He ended up coming up to me, as if he remembered. He ate of my finger when the other cats hogged the food away from him and he rubbed against me and purred.

I wasn’t able to go the next day and had gone 2 days without seeing my darling Pocket. I went there just yesterday and saw her again and she followed me around both her and tiger rubbed against me and while I was trying to get a photo she bunted!!
anyway I really wish I could get both her and her brother Tiger.

 

[silent meowlook]

Wait a second, you can pick the cat you get? I had no idea.

 

[azpops]

Oh I think they definitely pick you. You might not even know it but they do.

Agreed 100%! ...

 

[Ella Spell]

This will give me an opportunity to count my cats!


Childhood:
My dad used to build boats and work at a boatyard near the local marina. There must have been a lot of outdoor / feral cats in the area because he found single, stray kittens more than once. Before I was born he took home a ginger whose name, or even existence, my mother can't remember. I've only seen him in pictures when I was a toddler. That one must have died but again my mother can't remember it at all. She says it must have been from the marina though.

Tiger: We got another from the boatyard when I was about four. He got lost when we moved homes, and he did an "incredible journey" by showing up at our new house approx. six months later during the winter, even though he'd never been to the new home and it was quite a long distance. He was emaciated and needed to be put down. It's my earliest memory.

Kitty: We got a little girl tabby from the newspaper classifieds when I was about 8. She didn't live very long.

The Cat: When I was nine my dad brought home yet another from the marina. I remember him putting a big cardboard box on the kitchen floor and telling me to open it. I was thrilled with my little long-haired boy. My family could never decide what to name him. He had nicknames but was mostly called "The Cat". The Cat lived until I was in university.



Adult:

Buster Brown: When I graduated Uni and got married I really wanted a cat but my husband didn't like cats. He kept saying no. Then he would give me Christmas or birthday cards with handmade coupons that said "Redeemable for one kitten!" I'd get all excited but then he'd turn the coupon over, and on the back I'd find small print that he'd written saying stupid things like "Void if the recipient's name is Ella", or "Expired last year". Yup, he was a jerk. My mother got so upset by his stupid antics that one year she just bought me a kitten for Christmas. She got him in a pet shop and being Christmas he was the only one she could find, but he was a gorgeous and very tiny butterscotch-coloured dilute tabby. My husband threw a fit .... but, tough!!! He was mine!!! My husband grew to tolerate Buster but I didn't grow to tolerate my husband, so we got divorced. . My husband was gone by the time Buster turned two, and he lived to be 16.

Leo: When Buster was about five my friend found a red Maine Coon kitten about five months old, in a well. I took the kids and we helped to get him out. He was ours for the next 14 years, overlapping with Buster.

Tuffy: At Christmas 2003 I already had Buster and Leo. My dad had cancer so I decided to get him a kitten to snuggle with. I couldn't find kittens anywhere except for a shoddy low-budget place that sold lots of cats and dogs. I don't think they'd been well cared for. I bought a kitty named Tuffy. I picked him because he was the youngest one there, and most likely to bond with my dad or snuggle in bed. I took him to the vet for his wellness check prior to surprising my dad. The vet said he was very unhealthy and already had a broken tail which had healed. He had several other problems. The vet advised me against keeping him or giving him to my dad because he might die, and it would upset my mother who was also losing my dad. It would be depressing and expensive for my dad. I tried to keep Tuffy with Buster and Leo but they fought. Ultimately the vet said he would keep him and care for him until he found a better home.

Mokes: After the debacle with Tuffy my kids were sad that they didn't get to keep the kitten. My daughter's birthday is just days after Christmas and I already knew it was impossible to find healthy kittens anywhere. I got obsessed with trying to find one and finally walked into a pet shop which said they didn't have any. Then one of the staff advised me there was an extremely young one in the back of the shop. He was too young to be on display for adoption and he wasn't even vaccinated yet. I took him home for my daughter. I still have him. He's 20 years old now. Mokes lived with Buster and Leo for many years.

foot: (littlefoot) - My friend's teenaged son was staying with us in 2009. His girlfriend had found or adopted a female kitten and took it home to her parents, but they wouldn't let her keep her. I already had Buster, Leo, and Mokes (three boys), but foot came to join us. Sadly she only lived less than a year.

Milk: When foot passed we were all very upset and wanted another little girl to fill the void. I found Milk on Kijiji, and chose her because she looked a lot like foot. Milk lived with Buster, Leo, and Mokes but passed in 2018 at age 11 from Diabetes. Then I only had Mokes and my dog. Oh, and a zillion fish.

Then Covid happened.

Ouiji: (My avatar) - I had always wanted a black female cat and I knew I wanted to call her Ouiji (like a Ouija Board). I got bored during Covid lockdowns in 2020, and decided I'd just take a look on Kijiji. (I know, Ouiji from Kijiji ....) There were quite a few little black girls but most of them were too far away or they didn't seem like "the one". Then the heavens parted and I saw my Ouiji girl. I loved her instantly. It was also meant to be because she lived on a street that was very sentimental to my kids. I told myself I was crazy and didn't need another pet. I ended up inquiring about her, but decided to sleep on it. Overnight I resolved NOT to get her, but lo and behold she was in my car by noon the next day. Ouiji had a sister who was black with white paws, and an orange brother. I saw them in the photos on Kijiji but because it was high lockdown time, the owner handed me Ouiji at the door and didn't let me in the house. I never got to see the other ones in person. I kind of kicked myself later because I really should have taken two. Or all three. Hindsight is 20/20. Ouiji and Mokes got along OK but there was a 17 year age gap between them. Ouiji needed a playmate.

Willow: Eleven months after getting Ouiji I found Willow on Kijiji. She's a Tortie and I'd never had one (nor had I heard about Tortitude lol). The people had found her outdoors but couldn't keep her because of allergies. She was really cute and she really needed a home. My daughter said if I didn't go get her, she would. She's officially my daughter's cat but of course she's mine too and I get to pay all the bills. Willow and Ouiji - They get along nicely but never played together very much.

Macbeth: I got the urge for another kitten last June. I had tried for one through the local rescue but the application process was really competitive and I didn't get chosen for the little boy I wanted. I'm on disability so I don't think they like that in terms of income, even though my cats are spoiled rotten and I get vet insurance. I looked on Kijiji and wasn't even sure what I wanted. I decided that a face would call my name when I found the right one. Then I decided I'd like a girl. My boyfriend said he'd get me whichever one I wanted as a birthday gift. When I first saw Macbeth (my orange boy), the ad said he was a girl. I fell in love with (her) big eyes and (her) pictures. The woman fostered cats and was given Macbeth by her daughter's teacher who couldn't keep (her), but the foster person couldn't keep (her) either. We went to get (her) and I fell in love!!

Then, two days later the vet told us she was a boy. Whoops!

Hester: I still wanted a girl, and I remembered that it's better to get two at the same time. I got that wrong by not getting one of Ouiji's siblings. Macbeth didn't have a sibling, so three days after I got him I went back on Kijiji to start my quest for a girl who could be his sister. I'd been in contact with Hester's owner the week before but for some reason she had only advertised the orange boys in her litter and she didn't even mention Hester, her only girl, who was black and witchy looking. I'd turned down her orange boys originally, because I wanted a girl. She happened to text me to double check (yet again) if I wanted an orange boy because some of her adopters had changed their minds and she wanted to go on holiday. I told her I'd gone somewhere else to get an orange girl three days prior, but she turned out to be an orange boy ... so I already had one of those. I said I was open to getting another kitten but I still wanted it to be a girl. She shocked me by saying she had one female which she hadn't advertised (I can't remember why?), and she sent me a picture of Hester. I was in my car within about 20 minutes.

Now I have Macbeth and his three weird sisters (the witches) who are Ouiji, Willow, and Hester. I still have Mokes too, so that makes five. He's 20 years old and I have to convince myself I'm not going to replace him when he crosses the bridge. I think four will be more than enough.

I should mention I did look at a Scottish Fold who was going to be Macduff (Duffy), but my daughter said if I got another cat she'd move out.

Maybe some day?

 

[Biomehanika]

I really wanted a cat but my husband didn't like cats. He kept saying no. Then he would give me Christmas or birthday cards with handmade coupons that said "Redeemable for one kitten!" I'd get all excited but then he'd turn the coupon over, and on the back I'd find small print that he'd written saying stupid things like "Void if the recipient's name is Ella", or "Expired last year". Yup, he was a jerk.

Omg this made me so mad for you, my parents used to pull similar tricks on me at Christmas when I was a kid, I hated it

My husband grew to tolerate Buster but I didn't grow to tolerate my husband, so we got divorced. .

And this made me HAPPY lmao

 

[Ella Spell]

Your parents did?! Oh wow, that's awful. I'm so sorry.