Cali Doesn't Want To Adjust

[CharlieandBuster]

So, at my work, there is a colony of feral cats. 2 of them used to stay in the bushes at my building. Buster, the black cat, was very sociable and great at begging for food. Cali, was a shy one that liked to stay hidden. Buster would beg for food and take it to Cali to share and, sometimes, she would call Cali out to eat with her if it felt safe.

Nonetheless, I adopted Buster (the black cat) on Jan 30 and she adjust remarkably well . . . all too well it seems. She absolutely comfortable around me, loves to eat, loves being pet, loves to eat, loves jumping my lap to cuddle, loves to eat, loves to spoon with me when I sleep, loves to eat, loves to groom me, and loves to eat. I think the biggest tell that she is no longer feral is when she decided that it's cool for me to rub her tummy without trying to kick my hand away.

A couple days after I picked up Buster, a lady picked up Cali and took her in. Cali is a cuddly one but a scaredy cat. As I understand, she would hiss and fend off the lady's 2 other cats to the point that they ran away. Because of how clingy Buster is (don't get me wrong, I love the attention and love), I figured that taking Cali in would be good for Buster to have another friend to occupy her time. With a little bit of convincing, I managed to get Cali about 3 weeks ago.

At first, Buster was hostile and would hiss at Cali, who wanted to explore, through doors. However, after 3 days things changed. Buster stopped caring that Cali was around even realized that I was pulling out 2 bowls of food during mealtimes. Cali, on the other hand, has decided that she wants nothing to do with Buster. I did scent swapping the first week, and site swapping (back and forth) during the 2nd week and they were even eating peacefully within 4 feet of each other. This last week, I have been letting them roam freely for the most part. Cali hisses at Buster when they are near each other, even when she walks by Buster trying to get to me, and Buster wants to play with her old friend. In fact, Buster has tried to play with her (sharing her favorite mouse) already but Cali just lashed out at her when she got close. This episode led to Buster dropping the hammer on Cali before I could get out of bed and into the room where Buster chased Cali. These last days, Buster keeps wanting to play hang out with Cali, but is met with hisses and running away. I think the running away is making it worse since Buster seems to take it as a sign that games are on and gives chase.

I split them up frequently now, comforting Cali when she starts to growl but giving her a dash of water when she tries to lash out. They are both pretty much interchangeable in the apartment, adopting each other's spaces and even sharing the 2 litter boxes freely (covering up when they finish . . . I am monitoring this intently). The only issue is that Cali starts to growl when Buster is near her for whatever reason (usually when they both want to climb on top of me to pry their food bowls out of my hands) and Buster just wants to spread the love. Just now, I had Cali in my lap and was petting her. She was calm until Buster came up and tried to cuddle and lick her; then all hell broke lose on my leg . . . Cali got another whooping while I was still recoiling from the pain of her rear claws (both have front trimmed).

Am I doing this wrong? Should I back things up between them or just let them adjust to each freely in my presence at this point? As I see it, everything would be ideal if Cali would just settle down and accept that Buster means no harm. Hell, Buster isn't even being savage when she does drop the iron paw on Cali, she seems to just be making a point that she is not into having paws thrown at her face in hostility.

 

[CharlieandBuster]

Hmmmm, it's been almost 4 weeks already now. It seems like 3 but time is flying.

 

[di and bob]

All is normal. They were separated for a while so introductions have to start all over. 4 weeks is not long at all in a cats world, it will take months before they develop a bond. Hissing and slapping are all normal behavior for most female cats. don't punish Cali for instinctive, normal behavior. She has had two huge changes in her life in the last 4 weeks, and is extremely stressed. Don't let Buster bully her, play with her separately and give Cali a place high up that she can feel safe in and defend from unwanted attention by Buster. She will calm down in time. She looks calm on the outside but is scared to death on the inside. You can't change her personality. You can say NO loudly and remove her from the room to show your disapproval, but physical punishment does not motivate cats to change like it does dogs. It just makes them timid and scared, and wanting to hide. spraying with water is actually increasing her fear and stress about Buster, it is reinforcing taht when Buster is near, bad things happen. She needs to get good feelings, feed them close together and give treats together. time is what you need, it WILL happen, all the luck and keep us posted!

 

[duckpond]

I agree with di and bob. Lots of changes over the last month or so for both of them. I am very glad you have them both, and i think with some time, and patience you will be as well.

Try to keep them both calm, plenty of food bowls, litter boxes, beds, that kind of thing so they don't feel like they need to compete for resources.

As long as there is no fur or blood flying, no one is hiding all the time, not eating or using the litter box then it is normally better to let them work it out them self. Little Cali is scared, and it will just take time for her to believe that she has a home, and love, that she is safe.

Keep us updated!

 

[ArtNJ]

Cats sometimes forget their buddies after one goes to the vet for an overnight, so a couple of months is like a lifetime. So you were trying to be sweet and reunite special BFFs, but it just doesn't work that way in cat land.

I'd redo the introduction even more slowly. Apart from that, you got good advice above.

 

[CharlieandBuster]

I don't get it lol. Cali avoids Buster like the plague, I go to the kitchen and Cali is happy to crawl over her to be at the front of the line, she suddenly lashes at Buster for being too close even though she moved in. I put down food with bowls touching and she's fine to eat and walk away.

5 minutes later, she's growling as Buster moves around the room and is back to avoiding. All fine with me, Buster is leaving her alone and they are nested on opposite ends of the living room; so I start watching a documentary. I turn back and see Cali has climbed into Buster's bedding spot and they are just lying there on top of each other looking at me. I am sitting here now, knowing that as soon as I get up and Buster moves, she's going to snap.

 

[CharlieandBuster]

Yep. Buster blinked and Cali decided that she needed to fight for her life. Well, it was a nice moment while it lasted.

 

[duckpond]

It sounds like they are making some progress, and there there is a good possibility that they will work it out, eventually. It can take a long time with cats. My 3 were grown when i brought my last one home, he was grown too. It took several months before the two girls kind of accepted him enough that i would call them tentative friends. My other boy was a fan from the get go. It has taken about a year before the girls now will play with him, cuddle up and nap with him, and groom him. Good Luck with them. And enjoy the good, hopefully the rest will fall in line soon!