14 month old cat still hiding from me and can't touch her after 7 weeks. :(

[artyjill]

.

She doesn't jump on my bed, she hides and sleeps in the corner were l have a painting studio. The only person what has seen her is my grand daughter. I don't go looking for her as she will just dash out and l want her to feel calm in her little space. She talks to me at night and sometimes wakes me up with her chat. lts the only place she can hide as the bathroom is a wet room and is used a lot.

Would love her to come to me but hoping that will come.

Today l haven't seen her but by all the cat fur that was on her favourite things to play with is my two rugs in the hall and the room,l let her play with them as its nice to see her rolling  over and the hall one is a shaggy one so she is just putting her stamp on it,

  Jillx

 

[jan berry]

You should close off rooms she hides in and closets as well as things she can hide under to encourage her to be in contact with you and only use the room you call her room. This will bring her out of hiding more quickly. Since she is talking to you, these things to encourage contact are important, you may want to consider closing her room when you feel the time is right as she will still have your bed to hide under as a personal refuge.

 

[artyjill]

I am so excited, last night l watching tv and Daisy was late coming to the door way of the bedroom, you get to know her routine. I looked away from the tv and saw Daisy sniffing my legs, she has never been more than about ten foot away from me for 8 weeks tomorrow. She then whent to the hall and l kept very still and she came again to my legs, it was as though she knew my legs are useless Those two things made the sun come out for me. Then this morning she went behind the blind on the window l but didn't go away from me but sat looking out the window along side of me. My blinds were open so she knew were l was

Her tail isn't straight up yet but l can't hope for miracles but these things that have happened show me that baby steps do work.

     Jill xxxx

 

[artyjill]

Hi,

She can't get under my bed as its a electric  one that you can get to slope you back or lift your feet up so the bed goes to the floor but next to it is bathroom and that's closed but then the living room and kitchen are open plan but l was thinking in a  while l would get her to come out our room  for a little while and after a few days she would get longer.

 The bedroom is were she talks a lot to  me. I am loving this and if she stops l would miss it, even when she wakes me up early.

This time last week l was living up and was thinking she would never come out of it. It just shows you how it changes.

 

[jan berry]

Sounds like your making great progress.  If she likes your window, it would be good to put a shelf or small table at the window sill level and raise the blinds about 6 inches.  This is called a 'catification' or making the room cat friendly.  I also call it cat television.  She is enjoying looking out the window.  This will give her a place to lounge in your room and enjoy the view with you.  If she likes cat treats or you give her dry food, try walking very slowly and placing some dry food in front of her while she is sitting there.  It will tell her that this is a 'good' behavior and encourage her to come back.  There are special shelves made for windows that you can purchase on-line, check out amazon.com.  I have my night stand in front of my window, really anything that is large enough for her to lay on that puts her in front of the window.  

If you don't raise the blinds, she will begin to try to pull them apart.  As far as privacy goes, raising them 5 or 6 inches is not that big of a deal and she will get used to you giving her a time table if you close them at certain times of the day.

 

[artyjill]

Have had the blinds raised about 9ins for a long time as they used to drop into the radiator. My window sill is quite wide and she does lay down. My Persian cat used to sleep on the window sill. I have a lovely picture of her  laying next to a budda on there,. Will see if l can upload it.She was 12 when it was took I just remembered last night that she was nervous because the lady l got her from, her grandson was cruel to her, used to kick her and pick her up and throw her. When l went to her l was going to buy a 10 week kitten,  Abbie was 6 months old and was trying to play with them and was getting pushed out so asked the lady if for sale and she was. I was really pleased as she had to watch the grandson all the time as he and his mum lived there. Had forgotten that, she never liked men other than my husband and my son.

Daisy has never liked treats have tried lots of different ones but have canon dried food she has down with her jelly food so will try some of that. I will have a look at the shelf's, have never heard of them before. To go to the window sill she goes along the back of  the sofa across the cabinet the tv is on, it was covered in fur this morning so she had been looking in the night.

Just found a odd metal earing  like gold discs going down so have just put it on a long piece of strong  thread  l had tried feathers but when you threw it  didn't go far. But with this heavier it went a long way and i can  pull it slowly towards me. Will test it out when she wakes up.

  Jill

Abbie new 003.jpg

• artyjill
• Mar 23, 2015

 

[jan berry]

She's beautiful.  From looking at the picture, you don't need to worry about a shelf.  Your window sill is a great width.  The dry food should work just fine.  When I run out of treats on occasion, I put dry food in a treat bag and fools them til I can get to the store for a day but not longer.  The only thing the shelf would do is allow her to sit facing the window, your choice.   If the sofa is there, I'd say she's covered.  You're other baby is gorgeous!

 

[artyjill]

l went and spoit it last night. I had attached strong thread onto an odd earing and was trailing it on the floor and she was looking intently at it when l ran out of space so what did l  threw the cord over her to give me some more room to trail it, well she just ran into bedroom when l threw it and l could have kicked myself. She didn't come out to play anymore but she did come and lay down next to me later on.

Just longing for when she will let me stroke her,

    Jill

 

[jennyr]

l went and spoit it last night. I had attached strong thread onto an odd earing and was trailing it on the floor and she was looking intently at it when l ran out of space so what did l  threw the cord over her to give me some more room to trail it, well she just ran into bedroom when l threw it and l could have kicked myself. She didn't come out to play anymore but she did come and lay down next to me later on.
Just longing for when she will let me stroke her,

    Jill

Don't beat yourself up! There are bound to be ups and downs, and she has already forgiven you. It is impossible to be super careful all the time. I think you are making good progress overall.

 

[Columbine]

Mistakes happen. Don't stress about it. She'll come around again. You're doing so well with her. Trust that it will all work out. It's just a little setbacks.

 

[jan berry]

It obviously wasn't too big of a deal to her since she came back to lay down by you.  It was just a bit of a shock to her.  We all have those.  Remember when you start to scratch her cheeks or rub her ears.  Those are cat comfort zones/pleasure zones and also put her scent on you.  Bring your hand up from underneath or behind and not in front of her face.   If she's laying down beside you, that's when I would gently scratch her outside cheek and see how that goes.  Save the petting for after the cheeks get comfy.

Sounds like you're making good progress.

 

[artyjill]

Suddenly Maisie is going to the window sill  but she has started to look at me before she goes into the window and if l turn to look at her she turns and runs as fast as can into her room. Last night she did it 8 times and l didn,t look at her every time, l said once in a soft voice its ok then l pretended to read, shut my eyes lots of things. She finally made the last step and went in. She has just started doing this for the last three nights. When she is on the sill and l peep trough the blind and she looks at me with no problem.

Also she has stopped playing with her fishing rods. Have got two big games but never bothers and she liked  laser toy at fist but takes no notice now.. Only thing l can think  is she isn't ready to any closer to me.

But the look before she goes onto the window sill is l real frightened look as though she is to scared to go onto the sill.

     Jill

 

[cajuncaper]

Jill, Jan Berry here.  I was having issues so you'll see me as CajunCaper or Jan Berry.  It sounds like things are progressing well even though its frustrating.  

When you look at her, be sure to blink your eyes slowly so that she can see them.   This says I'm a friend in cat-speak, staring  or not blinking says I want to fight.  If she blinks back at you, then she's saying she understands and you are doing really well but still make SLOW, SMALL movements toward her.

It sounds like she is very happy with the window sill and is ok with being with you and the window.  Do you have some treats that she likes?  If not some dry food?  Next time she gets in the window sill by you wait until she is settled, then slowly lay some treats 5 or 6 inches from her so that she can reach them but is not frightened by your movement.  This will tell her that being in the window and by you is very good.  If you will reach your hand up from below the level of the window sill and gently lay them on it you should have better luck at not upsetting her and frightening her away.  If she accepts the treat and eats it that's great.  

If it frightens her away, don't be too upset.  Leave the treats there for when she comes back.  Let her know that the window sill, beside you is a place for treats as well as a place she likes.  Give it a day or 2 of her finding them there and then try laying them beside her again.  It may take a couple of days, but I bet it won't be long before she accepts you giving her the treat and then returns your blink.

It sounds like the window is a making a great place for the 2 of you to spend time getting comfortable with each other.

Jan

 

[artyjill]

I am blinking but l think i will have to take my glasses of as there big and bright red and l don't think she see's my eyes.

I have been slowley giving her treats but she runs away as soon as see's my hands holding them but tonight she was other side of my desk so started talking to her and have got the new whiskas long sticks, of them to see if l could hold them and she could bite bits of them  but it was to much so l carried on talking as l broke them up then passed them half way to her on the floor and she ate them all up and had seen me pass them to her..

I hate this look she gives me and it makes me feel that she thinks l am going to do something awful to her.

Jill

 

[jan berry]

Of my new fur baby family of 3 only 1 will eat treats from my hand and he was raised from a newborn kitty in my vet clinic and has so much socializing and was hand bottle fed. My son's siamese never would eat from anyone's hand but would eat treats sitting at the tips of your fingers.

I guess the moral to that story is to give her time on the treats from your hand, it sounds great that she's taking them so close to you so quickly. As to glasses, i too had to take mine off the 1st couple of times making contact with my reluctant ones but it works pretty quickly.

I don't know if you know the language of how cats talk with their tail. I've been a cat guardian for many years but have been enlightened on some new things in the last couple of years that have been a big help with the new additions. Tail talk goes like this:

Tail straight up. - confident and happy
Tail tucked under - nervous, afraid, confused
Tail flicking side to side (the faster the flick/swish the more emotionally charged)
- agitated, angry, aggressive, looking to fight

Have a good week, it sounds like you're on the right track.

Jan

 

[irinasak]

I have just come across your thread. Socializing and bonding to a cat sometimes takes time, so please try to see things from her perspective - big new house, new human, she doesn't know how safe it is, and this is something she must learn on her own. It is advisable so establish a routine - feeding time, playing time, sleeping time, and keep the routine, so she can have a pattern to learn.

One of my cats was almost 4 months old when I adopted her and for the first three months together she hissed at me every single time she saw me. No chance in touching her or handling her. The first time I petted her and she purred was after I lost all hope we could ever bond. I know how frustrating it is but usually TIME is all it takes. After months of thinking it was a mistake to adopt Amelie, she is now the most attention demanding cat in the house. She meows really loud for pets, she likes being groomed, and she allows us to trim her nails and to wipe her eyes. We have her for almost two years and she still has her moments of running and going into hiding. She will never be an outgoing, assertive cat, but I respect that.

 

[artyjill]

Well l have two things for this dull wet Easter Saturday, first is for UK members, if your cat eats felix there selling it  at Pet Shop Bowl  for a box of 42 its £.11.24 l got box of 88 you would think l had a few cats but l cannot go past a bargain. You would not think there would be be so much difference on prices on the pet websites. I wanted a metal bowl with a  rubber rim to stop it tipping up and they were from £1.30 to £3.70 and it would be worse if you had a small order and had to pay P/P

I know now that l am moving on with my scared kitten. The only thing she has done often in the last eight weeks is sit on the window  sill so l put my blinds up a little to help her get on them..But never thought she would want to sit on the bedroom window sill but when l went to bed l found out that when l thought she wasn't doing to well as she only came to  living room once. But looked at the window and saw my spaggetie blinds lot of strips hanging down and two of the things on the end of the cords you pull down missing. I knew if l said angthing l would not have seen her for a month but in a way l was pleased  as its the only kitten thing she has done in the last 8 weeks   Jill

 

[artyjill]

Jan

Daisy  tail is tucked under so still confused.

I am also confused as all of the toys l have bought her in the last few weeks, not playing with any of them but is playing with a little stone that came in on someones shoe lol

 Jill

 

[jan berry]

She sounds like the 2 of you are doing some perfectly normal things.  

My crew will play with a new toy for a day like it's amazing then not touch it.  The exception seems to be little balls about 2 inches or catnip mice about the same size.   I tend to find them all over the place as the mice are all my Sasha liked so she would get a  new one every couple of months, she liked to hide them.  The new cats are now finding the hiden mice from the last 7 years.

Your mangled blind is why mine are raised about 8 inches in all the windows.  Sounds like she'll be spending time with you in more rooms now that you know she likes sitting in the windows.   It's going to give you so much time closer together and before you know it she'll be sitting beside you.

It is so frustrating, the lack of cat toys on the market.   If you have any thread spools that are empty or nearly they are fun toys to play with on the floor or put on a string.  Also, most of the cat toys are on elastic, so if you were to put it on elastic about 36 inches and put it on a ruler/rod type handle.  You can sit/stand and interact well with her.

My Darci has been most interested lately in the frogs that she has caught out in the back yard and brought in.  She carried them by the back of the neck like a kitten.  She's gotten better about bringing in live frogs instead of dead ones.  Geeze!  

I'll be glad to send you a couple for playmates for Daisy.  They fit in the palm of your hand.  

I hope you have many years of purrs and petting ahead of you!!

Jan

 

[artyjill]

Your cats sound lovely l feel like l know them. Last night in my flat it was the Derby horse race as Daisy was running from the bedroom through to were i was in the living room, she was going at sch a speed you could see her back was in big arcs as she bounced also then another time she surprised me and shot out at the back of my chair and l hadn't known she was there.

Do you use the spell checker on here, l am such a bad speller l useit a lot but its goneand the one it hasis block of words but nothing like l need and when l right click a word l get. the word paste .. The spell checker l have on most websites including this one when l joined  just seemed to know what word and spelling l needed.

I got the cats meow toy today but bet she will not use it.

Tried a few times to take a photo of Daisy but she is to fast, l think she thinks something will shoot out.

Talk to you later.

                        Jill