in my house it's my husband so i was curious how it is for everyone else?
i don't mean small decisions but the important one's, who has the last say?
i don't mean small decisions but the important one's, who has the last say?
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who has the last say?
- Thread starter pandybear
- Start Date
Shy and I usually compromise. If anyone has the last say, though--it's usually me. I have minor control issues
.
Though we're not married yet, we compromise on anything and everything when possible.
As an advocate, a red flag for signs of abuse is when one partner (usually the husband) has absolute and final say over EVERYTHING. Serious control issues (which I know you don't have Kelly
) are a sign that someone could potentially be abusive in some way, shape, or form. The "what I say goes" mentality can be dangerous. That's the way it was for my parents and, after years of emotional/verbal abuse (inflicted by my father, who made all of the final important decisions- no ifs, ands, or buts), they are divorced. 'nuff said.
Healthy relationships are about compromise.
As an advocate, a red flag for signs of abuse is when one partner (usually the husband) has absolute and final say over EVERYTHING. Serious control issues (which I know you don't have Kelly
Healthy relationships are about compromise.
pretty much most big decisions are made by me but most of the decisions are compromises between us.
hummmmmm
when is a serious decision WE analize every point
, in other words we try to "talk" all....
I think depends what is the case, sometimes she took the desicion and sometime I....
I think depends what is the case, sometimes she took the desicion and sometime I....
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #7
i disagree, my husband is loving, kind, generous, romatic, my best friend, everything, i am happy to let him make the desisions, it takes a weight off my chest and i trust him to do the right thing.
if it is something very important to me then yes, of course we will discuss it but generally i am happy to let him decide, it doesn't bother me at all
Totally compromise. There's hardly ever anything that we go in opposite directions about. I never flat out say "no" and he doesn't either. If one or the other doesn't think (whatever) is a good idea, then he/I will attempt to discourage but that's as far as it goes. My thing right now is --- "Now what the devil are you going to do with an old boat that doesn't have a motor in it? We don't really have anyplace to keep it." LOL, he knows this and hasn't been pushing for it but if he really wanted the thing I wouldn't say no.
Voting for my family, I chose, "my husband," but voting for my dad.
I didn't mean that it is the same way in every relationship, just a general red flag in some.Originally Posted by pandybear
i disagree, my husband is loving, kind, generous, romatic, my best friend, everything, i am happy to let him make the desisions, it takes a weight off my chest and i trust him to do the right thing.
if it is something very important to me then yes, of course we will discuss it but generally i am happy to let him decide, it doesn't bother me at all
Sorry, I'm a hard-core feminist and I want my voice heard in a relationship!
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #11
my husband has brought a few things that made me think :censor::censor::censor:?
but if it makes him happy i don't care, he will soon find out it was a mistake then i can say 'told you so!'
most of the time we agree too so there is no reason to have anyone make the final decision but if it is something we just can't agree on then he will decide and i am happy with that, there are no arguments and everything works out great.
we do have a traditional marriage though
he is not some abusive man, he is the most loving man i have ever met, we tell each other everything, he whisks me away on romatic weekends, while on a business trip he payed for six nights in a spa suite so i could be with him and i can tell him anything, we don't have secrets, so having a man who makes final decisions is not always a bad thing.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #12
hey that's okay
everyone is entitled to have their relationship the way they want, i am happy in my relationship but that's only because it's right for me, i don't expect everyone to feel the same way i do
NO! BIG decisions are made between both of us. We try to compromise on other things. And Trav doesn't LIKE making decisions so I make most decisions.
we talk together..and usually have to agree together. but if anyone has the last say..its usually me.
LOL, I love having a couple on here!
We usually agree on everything, that's because we like the same exact things...foods, tv shows, where the money goes, what we do in our spare time...etc. If I don't like something, trust me...he'll know
I voted me but thats only because I am single and my cats cant control the money other wise they run things.
We discuss things, and if we just cannot agree, he has the final say. Since he is not the kind of person to tell me what to do, if he has a strong opinion about something, I can trust that he thinks it is truly the right thing.
Usually, I have the last say so, because my husband doesnt like to make decisions....so I have to do it.
I have to say that marriage is the easy part....living together and doing everything else together is the hard part. Sometimes you just need a good referee.
I have to say that marriage is the easy part....living together and doing everything else together is the hard part. Sometimes you just need a good referee.
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