First of all... your weight is NOT his business. If he can't accept you at your current weight, and is going to start using control tactics in order to scare you (would you honestly want to end up with someone like that anyway?), he's not worth another minute of your time.
For many men, weight isn't an issue at all. In fact, some men like curvier women (my last boyfriend thought I was too skinny and I'm a size 10/12) so keep that in mind. You are worth SO much more than that, and only you can decide if and when you're ready to lose weight.
Also, remember that even if you are overweight, it doesn't mean you're unhealthy. Some people are just heavier than others. Personally, I think your ex has been watching too much porn and looking at too many magazine covers to appreciate real women. Let him keep doing it, and he'll regret that ultimatum he gave you.
And DON'T go back. You are worth FAR more than that. I might be up in Midland in the next bit, so if you want to chat over coffee, PM me.
Originally Posted by Sylorna
Thank you all for your kind words. Today has been one of the hardest days I can ever remember....my eyes are raw from crying.
I got a call from his supervisor today looking for him...they're sending him to Sudan on Friday (airforce).
What a strange painful day. I am proud of myself for doing what had to be done, but am so sad that it did. I knew I had to when he told me that he couldn't love me unconditionally. We broke up because he wanted me to become more physically fit (apparently it hurt him to see me overweight and unfit) and told me that he'd leave me if I didn't. he says it's as if I were doing drugs and hurting myself that way...he can't watch it if it continues. I say that I need support and to know i"m loved if I'm going to make a life change, not to know that he's going to leave if I don't succeed.
I can't believe this has happened. I loved him so much.