or Connect
TheCatSite.com › Forums › General Forums › The Cat Lounge › We've taken on a new cat - Tigger
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

We've taken on a new cat - Tigger - Page 13  

post #361 of 539
Thread Starter 
I happened to glance into the office/computer room, while exiting the master bedroom when I saw Master Tigger and Master Shadow Ram perched at the observation station. A slow scan from left to right, heads in unison was underway. I see no tail fwapping or hear a natter, so it must be a short enjoy the outside of our domain (it my domain you silly slave master Tigger would utter if he had heard me) scan just because it's pleasant to do right now. (I think it's similar to a coffee break for slaves that my masters do from time to time)

A brisk wind blowing leaves around the yard is occasion to just stop and watch the world go by.

"It's a nice day, eh Shadow?" Tigger murmers...

"It is indeed." he replies

"psssssssst... secondary slave is behind us.......watching" Tigger remarks

"He's not coming over so he's going to leave us alone. Good" Shadows mentions....

I leave them to their break. (such hard workers they are)
post #362 of 539
Thread Starter 
"You're trying to poison me!" master Tigger muttered

This is the normal food you get when you eat master DW said.

"How often do I have to tell you that it's bad food." Tigger exclaimed.

This food is special. The evil vet ...


The doctor has you eat this kind of food to help with your kidney problem.

"What part of "I want good food" don't you understand?"

and he walked away. Disgusted methinks.

a short time later, Master Tigger was trying to decide how he wanted to hold DW hostage. Curled up on her lap or stretched out on her legs.

Having problems master?

"Oh bother. Sit down here."

Yes master. (So I sit down)

"Ah.. this works for me." Tigger sighed....

I had decided to lay down across the work station and master Tigger decided to curl on on my calves. He went to work.

Is that snoring? DW giggled....

--------insert a hour and half--------

DW remarks: He seems to like you more then me today. I must be in the doghouse ....

I reply: Sure seems that way. My legs are getting tired though. I have been reading with master Tigger and he's been hard at work.

"You should have my work ethic." Tigger says loftily.

Not everyone in the world is like you master.

"There are good workers, excellent workers and than master workers." Tigger deigned to say.

Yes master. You've often told me how I am lacking in that respect.

Master Tigger decided to take a break so he got up. Stretched to a length only masters are capable of (3 times their normal length seems to be the right figure) and walked over to the book I was reading.

He stood on the book.

"What'cha reading slave?" he asked.

It's not about masters master.

"It should be."

and he promptly turned around and stuck his tail in my face.

"You can check out the tail mail slave." (he giggled at the pun)

I'm sorry master. I don't read tail male. I'm not trained.

"You should be. All masters check out the mail to smell what's new."

I'm sorry. I don't.

"I think you need some accupuncture for you well being." and he proceeded to apply the ancient art.

oh... oh.... I get your point. Could you please stop?

"If you insist."

and he launched himself off the bed (and left some small punctures as he left)

Thank you, master.

"You're welcome.... as he disappeared down the hall.
post #363 of 539
Thread Starter 
I have been remiss in posting the Chronicles of Tigger as I have been home for the last week. As is my wont, I take time off work just prior to Christmas to prepare and practice choir work. I have been overloaded with data concerning my master, but I shall attempt to describe.

Master Tigger walked out of the watering station, after having had DW turn on the water. She was looking at him and...

DW: I have turned on the water 3 times for you Tigger. You drank only small amounts.

Tigger winked at me (he really did wink at me) and said "I really do not have to tell you why I want something. You're a slave and must follow my bidding."

It must be a test DW muttered.

"No it is not a test. I tasted the water. I didn't like the temperature or the taste so I left."

I think I detected a smirk, but I find it difficult to descern what my master means unless he makes really big face movements (or he's up close and personal) as I tower over him by at least 5 feet.

"I only have 4 feet slave. You're not very observant or you easitly forget simple things. I am not like Charlie"

Uh.. yes master.

A short while later:

I was going out into the garage when master Tigger zoomed past me. He went so fast I didn't see him enter forbidden territory.

"WWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe I get to explore here." he cried out (he ignored the very cold concret floor)

Uh.. master. You know that there are dangerous chemicals and such out here. You don't kow these dangers.

"It matters not to me. I get to explore! ahhh such new and interesting things. So many smells.... (I will ignore the cold for now. It's too much fun right now)

I swooped and scooped my master. Such purring I've not heard in awhile.

"You let me investigate for a time, so I will not get upset at you."

Yes master.

I took him inside and DW remarked.... He looks pleased. Sounds like it also. Cold feet master? she remarked.

"Pet me slave." he purred

Two slaves petting..........

Looking around the kitchen, Master Tigger was in a very good mood. I passed him to his primary slave.

"Thank you slave."

I went to the computer room to check email and such.

You're going to be in a good mood.....

I heard that statement from DW. She was in the spare bedroom, which she uses to store fabric and knitting supplies. (It's another forbidden room for masters)

"Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee So much so many new smells.... You let me in to explore slave."

I could tell he was in a very special place. The garage and the extra bedroom, all in one day.

While reading email, master Charlie tapped me on the shoulder. Yes master?

"Hold still. I'm going to get on your lap." he ordered

and he walked over my shoulder and jumped down to my lap.

"Pet me."

and he started holding me hostage and working at the same time. (masters are skilled in these matters)

Charlie cat stretched (he extended at least 2 times his normal length - a feat I have been unable to ascertain as to how he accomplishes this. I'm a old and stupid slave)
and he flexed his claws.

Master. I am not prepared for accupuncture treatments.

"Your point is?" he asked. "Never mind. You don't have any fine pointed claws."

Good point I said.

and he launched himself to the doorway, leaving me broken and bleeding sitting in a chair beside the masters observation station.

"You lie slave." I heard Charlie exclaim from down the hallway. "I don't smell any blood from here."

You are correct master. I was telling you fans about your jump.

"As well you should."
------------insert time-------------------------
Have you become a dog? (I heard this statement from down the hall

"Why are you so insulting?" he asked

You know that cold white stuff is outside so don't try.

"I'm angry with you." I heard him say.

and he came into the bedroom.

"She's insulting."

and found a throat cough drop I had left on the bed, while I was changing into indoor cold weather pants (known as sweat pants to most folks) that master Tigger found to his liking as he could use me as a work station and keep warmer at the same time.

His kitten came out and started batting it around.

----------insert many kitten antics---------------

Thank you for the good acrobatics you just performed Master Tigger.

"You're welcome"

-------------insert several hours------------------

I was taking a break from working on choir chores by watching some TV. Laying on the bed...

Master Tigger sauntered in and became velco cat once again, as his primary slave was watching with me. He went to her lap, but found that she had a laptop computer there.

"Hey.. move that thing. I want to work on your lap." Tigger ordered

and he tried to push the laptop out of the way.

DW: Please don't do that. If it falls on the floor it will be expensive to repair.

"Move this thing."

DW: I'm starting........

but she was talking to empty air as he came over to me. He circled around on my legs to find the best spot.

DW: Examined and found wanting I see.

but she was talking to a master who had started working.
post #364 of 539
Ah more tales of Tigger!
post #365 of 539
Thread Starter 
"WHAT are you doing there!!!!!!!!" master Tigger exclaimed

(Tigger was talking to Charlie Cat)


"I am getting impatient with your lack of a response, you young whippersnapper!!!"

I could tell he was not happy with Charlie as I could see his fore claws tapping the top of the masters work station, not unlike a impatient slave waiting on another slave or dog (placed in this thread as to placate my master since they ignore these little asides)

tap tap tap tap one claw after the other, in sequence.

"I HAVE HAD ENOUGH.............."

whereupon I picked up my master and started petting him and giving him attention. His primary slave was looking somewhat uncomforable since DW did allow Charlie to stretch full length on her legs so he could work on a warm surface. My masters do this often since the outside temperatures are below zero right now. It is a cold winter.

"Will you put me down please." Tigger almost snarled.

Yes master. You did, however, leave your slave and did not tell anyone that you were coming back. Charlie did look around for you before he started work.

"Without regard to that. I am still the NUMBER ONE MASTER here!"

Yes master. Would you like some food or water? (hoping to get his mind off the offending working master)

"Well.... maybe some food."

of which he only looked at the food.

"Silly slave. I know what you were doing."

Yes master. Water?


uh... was that a yes for water or a yes to answer the question or a yes to placate me (I was not getting angry) or a yes to tell me you heard the question?

and he walked away. Tail high

"He is such a silly slave now and again. I like playing games with him."

and I walked into the bedroom and saw Tigger about to grab Charlie by the neck. Charlie stood up. Stretched to about 3 times his normal length and yawned.

"I am not happy with anyone right now." Tigger snarled

Whereupon DW and I both started petting and paying attention. It took awhile to calm him down.
post #366 of 539
Thread Starter 
"Where have you been?" Master Tigger asked

We went to a wedding master.

"I don't know that I care about what you slaves do, except where I'm left alone for so long. I have not been given proper attention." Tigger announced regally.

Yes master, but the people we were with like cats......

"WHAT! Masters.... silly slave. NOT cats."

So we picked him up and gave him attention.

"Ah... that's better. Oh.. oh... just a little to the left. There...."

DW continued the scritch....

I turned on the TV and master Tigger decided that my legs were warmer than DW and he settled down to work on me.

I heard some very faint snores....
post #367 of 539
Thread Starter 
I awoke with a certain master sitting on my chest. He was looking in my face from close range.

"Hey... you were sleeping. I want to talk." Tigger said.

I have to work tonight. I have the night shift.

"and that affects me how?" he said.

Well... it makes the money that I have to earn so that you have a...

"Domain. You were about to say domain. I am master of all I survey." Tigger said gently.

Yes master. I still have to get plenty of sleep because I can't sleep at work.

"When I go to work it's right here silly slave."

Yes master. I have to go many miles away and work behind the doors of another building. Why did you wake me up?

"I wanted some attention. My primary slave has gone and I want attention."

I looked at the clock and saw I had to get more sleep, but knew I had to give Tigger attention.

"ah...... that's the spot." Tigger purred

I continued to scritch and pet.

"That's enough slave. I must get to work."

so I went to sleep and Tigger went to work. (I wish I had the work ethic he did, but I'm just a secondary slave_
post #368 of 539
Thread Starter 
"Slave!" Tigger remarked

Yes master.

"Where is my primary slave?"

I don't know master. She may be shopping for food, cat litter or any number of things. She could be having some voice lessons also.

"She does sing, but not at as good as a master. I'll grant you that. You, on the other hand just make noise that should be left in behind sound proof doors." (heheh I wonder if I'll get a response from that. He's not bad either, but I'll never tell him)

It's something to do master. I am going to start playing that baritone horn over there in the corner.

"Not while I'm around." he muttered.

He stood up.... (he was like a library lion on the box that was on top of a computer printer that I was given to check out/repair and give to needy people who could not afford such.)

Tigger stretched to 3 times his normal length (how do they do that? I'm mystified by this type act) and sat looking down at me.

"Thank you for putting this box here. It helps me survey my domain AND look out the window for intruder cat."

You're welcome master.

but I was talking to a statue. He had gone into stasis mode. Sitting like the ancient god of Egypt, Bastet
post #369 of 539
Thread Starter 
DW related the following to me when I awoke this afternoon, prior to going to work.

"Slave!" Tigger said

Yes master? DW responded.

"I have need of being entertained. I am also in a helper master mode. This means that I shall help you with what your doing and I get to be ...................."

Tigger left that statement like a dangling participle.

Master Tigger would pounce or push the little pieces of papter that DW left on the fabric cutting table. (DW was sewing and cutting fabric in the outlines of the pattern... a art that I could barely grasp as something related to sewing but incomprehensible to those of use not skilled in the sewing arts. She will wave her magic hands and other sundry items related to the craft and garments appear. I'm baffled)

"Ah... such a nice piece there...." as he smacked it with a paw

DW: Thank you for that assistance.

"Here. Let me get my tail in of the way"

DW: I'm glad you're not a dog and wagging that tail.

"WHAT! Oh... you said you were glad I am NOT a dog."

DW: uh huh Dog are helpful also. Wagging the tail can send items to the next room.

"That's a nice color that should go with that color." as he pushed the fabric to the side of the cutting table.

DW: Thank you master

"Im hungry"

Yes master. (DW gets the food out and places it in front of him.

"That's not what I wanted. I want something else. Never mind."

and he walked away.

---------Repeat any of the above sequences many times.-----------

I awaken, put on my bathrobe and go into the kitchen to make some oatmeal.

"AH... You're taking a break from working I see. You make too much noise when you work. Did you know that?" Tigger said

Yes master. I snore and have a breathing machine and they are both loud.

"Silly slave should work quietly."

Yes master.

I placed the oatmeal on the table and went to get coffee.

"Let me taste this goo." Tigger said

"Ugh... that's hot and it's really goo"

You know you don't like oatmeal.

"That bird does, so I figured I might."

That's Sunshine and I weaned her with oatmeal. She loves the stuff.

"Yeah... she tries to ooze through the cage bars when she can get some."

Do you want me to clean off your foot?

"No. You can't clean me properly. I'll do it."

(I glad he hadn't gone to the kitty box prior to tasting my oatmeal)

I finish breakfast and get dressed.....

and Tigger goes back to help DW.

I return to the sewing table and open a drawer....

P O U N C E........ and a wayward piece of fabric is caught as I open the drawer.

Thank you for catching that fabric. We never would have

I went to the computer room/office to check email.

Tigger sauntered in and got up on the observation station. I didn't know this as I don't very good hearing when masters are in stealth mode.

Reading a email, Tigger decided to stand on the keyboard and ask me a question.

"What'cha doing slave?" front feet on the keyboard, back feet on the desk.

and the screen was filling up with "K, L, R, E and D"

"That's a nice expression on your face, slave." Tigger remarked

Thank you for dong such a fine job of editing this email.

"You're welcome."
post #370 of 539
Thread Starter 
"M E O LLLLL W" Tigger spoke to me as I turned the corner into the hallway. He was standing with his nose in the corner of the door, as if he had been put into TIME OUT for being un masterful.

"MEOW!" he said again.

Yes master?

"What part of MEOW don't you understand?" Tigger stated.

I'm sorry. I am not going to let you into that room unescorted.

"My primary slave lets me in. I like exploring there. So many different smells, toys and such to figure out the use of."

I will not.

"M E W LLLLLLO W" he screamed.

DW called from the kitchen: He wants in the room doesn't he.

Yes... and I'm letting him in.

I picked him up and started petting him. (maybe I'll get his mind off the forbidden room)

and I walked into the kitchen.

"Put me down slave. I'll get primary slave to let me in." he muttered

Yes master.

DW said: I'll let you in later. I have food to prepare.

"FOOD? Did someone say food? Feed me."

Yes master.

"You do ok, now and than silly slave."

Thank you.

"but you didn't do good now. Go away."

Yes master.

---------------insert two trips to evil vet-----------------

First trip was Master Tigger and Charlie. Both masters enjoyed parts of the time at vet. Investigation new smells and slaves who gave them attention. Both Tigger and Charlie gave little trouble.

Second trip was Laptop and Shadow. Holding on with all four sets of claws, Shadow did NOT want to come out, but once out of his travel cage he investigated everything.

More slaves to give attention.

-----------end trip to evil ver--------

Master Tigger hissed at Charlie because he smelled like evil vet. (silly master smelled like evil vet but didn't hiss at himself)
post #371 of 539
Thread Starter 
Fat tail, marmalade fur standing up, fangs being displayed, low growl..........

"I am going to rip out your throat!" Tigger muttered

Charlie laying foot of bed leaning on DW feet just ignored him. (I think he did but he may have been putting up a brave front to egg Tigger on)

DW was telling Tigger to settle down.

so I walked up to the masters work station and picked him up. I started petting and saying soothing things.....

but Tigger wanted nothing to do with it. He was angry and wanted to display his "Leader of the pack" (I hope Tigger doesn't read this or he'll accuse me of calling him a dog) attitude.

He jumped down. I started to pick him up again, but he went through the motions of try ing to bite me. (the last time he bite me I was in the hospital for 4 days with inflamed tissue of the hand..... IV antibiotics and pain killers) I backed off.

A short time later, Tigger had calmed down and didn't need to go to his "Time Out" room.
Charlie was "almost taunting" but decided not to when DW and I spoke to him.

"I didn't mean nothin' " Charlie said.

Uh huh... and that's why Tigger was so angry?

"Was he angry at me? I didn't notice."

So we left him at the end of the bed and went out to the kitchen to distract Tigger.
post #372 of 539
Thread Starter 
Master Tigger was "lounging" in the hall, reading a copy of "Fang Shui" by Catfucius (with help from Michael Domis) Feng Shui for Felines, ISBN 0-88088-775-3 when I walked through the front door.

"Hello slave." he remarked

Greetings oh gracious master

"(Why is he buttering me up?) You may pet .................."


I was still 10 feet away and he smelled them on me. Our next door slave has 2 masters. (Hobbes and Abby)

"You should know by now that I can tell when you've been with other masters."

I didn't hide the fact I was going there, oh gracious master. He is taking a....

"That long toy you got out of the room?" he inquired

Yes master. I thought you gave me permission to take it away.

"I did. You know I donate old used toys to needy masters."

Does it mention something about that in the book? (I was trying to change topics to get out of the doghouse)

"I'm not sure you can comprehend the philosophy of this missive." he said

I'm sure it has pictures than?

"Maybe 5 or so that you could understand." he said regally

I'll lay on the bed and you can hold my legs down right now. (Many of our masters like to hold us down during the cold months. As I am of Yup'ik Eskimo extraction I seem to produce more body heat than primary slave)

"I "may" acquiesce to your suggestion when I'm done comtemplating the whichness of the why" he sighed......

(I know he's tempted by my offer. He just can't appear to be eager to use a suggestion by a slave since he didn't ask first)

It will............

and I saw that master was rolling his eyes into the back of his head.

I was talking to air again because Master Tigger was zoned out.
post #373 of 539
Thread Starter 
"It is my deisre to have some FRESH water."

Yes master, I replied, as I turned on the water.

Master Charlie sauntered in and started looking at the water as it flowed down.

"I am thirsty as well." Charlie said haughily.

"Hey Tigger. Save some for me. I think you're taking too much."

(Master Tigger ignored this statement)

Charlie tapped Tigger ....

"You shall wait till I am done, young pup."

"Did he just call me a dog?" Charlie asked me

All I heard was garbled since he's drinking...

"I think he insulted me."

("I did, but I can get away with it because you're not Alpha, silly newcomer" Tigger thought)

"ah... that was good." Tigger stretched... but still prevented Charlie from drinking

"I'm dying of thirst here Tigger."

"Yes... you may well be but go drink out of the bowl."

Master Tigger allowed just enough room for Charlie to get his nose in, so he started drinking.

"Pushy young tabby you are." he mutterd

"lap lap lap lap lap lap lap lap lap" is all I heard from Charlie.

He's drinking Master Tigger.

"Ya think?" I heard Master Shadow Ram say from the toilet access point.

When I looked back Tigger was gone. (How did he do that? I hate it when they disappear so quickly)

("It's a secret silly slave..... " )Shadow Ram thought

What happened to.......

and I was looking at Shadow Ram drinking. Charlie had disappeared.

"Hey slave. I think I want a drink." Tigger said as he walked into the watering station.

Yes master, but you had a drink just seconds ago.

"That was than. This is now."

Tigger was looking down at Shadow drink.

("pppssssssstttttt we're playing games with this slave.")

Shadow finished drinking, and sat on the edge. Tigger was drinking....

and Charlie looked up at me from the edge of the sink.

("He's confused. This is so much fun and so easy") they all thought

He's done, I heard from the kitchen, DW told me.

Thank you for that, but uh....

Are they playing musical magic cat tricks again? DW had been taken avantage of these tricks as well. She is much faster than I at discovering the games masters play since I'm an old silly slave male. ( I was also ready for bed, since I'm working the night shift, so combine a slow brain, tired body and tired brain and I can be easily duped)

I crawled into bed.......

and Tigger watched me from the edge of the masters work station.

He pounced from 3 feet away. My foot had just been caught.

"Hah.... I have just caught the crawling creature. Shall I kill it and......"

No master. You should not kill it. I need it.

He slapped the creature.

"You live this time!"

and he pounced again. This time my knee was attacked.

Thank you master. Please stop hunting. I have to sleep.

but Master Tigger had assumed his working position. Curled into a tight marmalade ball.

So I went to sleep and Master Tigger went to work.
post #374 of 539
Thread Starter 
the door opened......

and there they go. Shadow Ram is first around the corner, followed by a whisker of Charlie. They're pounding through the kitchen.......

(I heard the door open as DW called out about thirsty masters)

as I stepped out of the computer room/office I see master Tigger sitting in the middle of the hall.

A long stretch has just been terminated (he shrank by at least 4 feet and I'm still baffled how masters can stretch out so much) and Tigger stands up.

"ah... I enjoyed that. (I am now going to play with my subjects)"

Charlie and Shadow are neck and neck as they race around the corner and down the hall.

"DRAT! Tigger's going to.........." they both exclaimed

bi-locate to the sink. (Tigger had just demonstrated the master’s ability to transport him from one point in space/time to another within the blink of an eye)

"I am thirsty slave. Turn on the water!" he ordered

and so I did. I also noticed that Charlie was getting too close to Tigger, while he was drinking, and Shadow waited impatiently on the toilet.

"You're getting too close silly slave lover!" Tigger taunted

"ah... this water tastes better now." he continued to taunt

"I should teach you how to be a better......" Charlie tried to say

"Don't go there! You don't want me angry!" Tigger muttered

"yes.... most excellent alpha leader. I hear and obey."

"Good. Now let me finish quenching my thirst."

and 10 minutes later he did finish.
post #375 of 539
Thread Starter 
It was Cold and blustry - not the type day that myl masters enjoyed, although some writers start their story in this fashion. I'm not of that ilk.

"And what do you call that opening, silly slave?" Tigger muttered.

Ok. How about: "It was a dark and ....."

"Don't go there. I'll be forced to hurt you." Tigger exclaimed

Than how should I present the opening oh literate master? I inquired.

"Starting with an amusing anticdote about meow would be excellent." Tigger purred

Full of glowing and complimentary adjectives as well?

"You're getting close, for a silly slave."

How about the race you and Shadow had a race to the heating vent that's right beside the computer battery backup that's so warm when it's so cold out?

"Did I mention that this should be expounded upon? No. I said nothing of the kind. (nothing that might indicate that any of my minions are better or faster than I) he thought.

How about how you like to lay on my legs to work and keep warm? I asked

"When I try to work, while laying on your legs you keep moving, thus interrupting my space of positive working habits."

You mean slee........

"Don't go there. I will not tolerate a silly slave who thinks all masters are actually sleeping when it happens to be heavy labor we're performing." Tigger said rather forcefully.

How about the time you fell.......

"ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! How many times do I have to tell you that I was demonstrating how agile we masters are by making it appear a master can fall off a workstation and land on his feet."

uh... do you have anything I should use to present your chronicles today?

"I was starting to study that book you have. The Art of War seems a bit long winded." Tigger said. Let me list what should be done.

1. Track your prey, as any normal master can do. Quietly
2. Pounce
3. Catch and do what is needed. (Sometimes that's play with the food, but I'm not going to tell you silly slave)
4. Present to slave to show how skilled we are.

"That's it. We don't into hundreds or thousands of words like that writer did."

(Sūn Zǐ Bīng Fǎ was succinct and to the point but Tigger won't believe that)

Yes master. I underst........

"Don't say you understand, because you don't." Tigger said.

Uh... yes. I agree

and Tigger walked off
post #376 of 539
Thread Starter 
Master Tigger and Charlie Cat were taken to see the evil vet this morning. Inasmuch as I was getting off the night shift, I had to sleep, and missed the excitement.

"I WILL NOT GET IN THAT CAGE! I DON'T LIKE THAT CAGE! I WON'T" Tigger and Charlie screamed.

Charlie had to see the dentest, and Tigger had to be tested for his kidney disease.

DW came home, and I was informed when I awoke, that Tigger had to stay a couple of days. Evil Vet did NOT like the numbers on the test. The IV had been inserted and liquids were being given.

All slaves in the household went to visit this evening.

"I want attention from all you slaves. I want it now! Pet me!" Tigger muttered

so we all took turns and initially we all gave him attention. A purrs could be heard by a vet tech several feet away he wsa so loud.

"Ah.... just what I needed. That -----------> slave has abused me. Making my leg hurt and attaching that long leash thing. I want nothing to do with her."

She brought you different kinds of food, so she can't be bad.

"Well.... maybe she has some goodness in her."

I went to the cage where Charlie was hiding and started to talk to him. A moving lump under the blanket....

and a nose appeared...... than a eye...... a paw....... a leg.... both eyes.....and finally a head. I reached and started petting

.......and Charlie appeared.

"Ah... my slaves. Good slaves. Give me attention. (it was difficult to understand as Charlie had been given drugs)

This is your cat....This is your cat on drugs.............WHEEEEEEEEEEE

Have you been having a bad day Charlie?

"I don't want to talk about it. My mouth and teeth hurt.... I'm glad you're here. Take me home.

Let us give Tigger more attention. (I could hear Tigger hissing at Charlie because Tigger thinks Charlie is a evil cat not of his domain and he smells of evil vet)

"He's been in a bad mood when he can't see me." Charlie told me. "He was also EVIL CAT when they were getting me ready for whatever they did to me. I don't remember much after that needle." Charlie said.


Master Tigger was held by all slaves and he tried to climb on the shoulder of all. We restrained him and kept his IV tube clear. Much attention till it was time to go home.

We put Charlie into his travel cage (that was fun)

"HEY! You're leaving me here to suffer at the hands of these evil people!"

Yes master. It's to help you.

and we left
post #377 of 539
Thread Starter 
We went to see Master Tigger (who was imprisoned at the evil vet because needed close medical attention since his kidney disease was acting up) and we received many complaints.

"I don't like the accommodations here. They don't have running water here for me to drink. (He was getting IV fluids constantly and thus did not require drinking out of a sink)

"I heard that. Don't listen to this silly slave. He lies when it comes to what's good or bad." Tigger said. This place smells. The food is not good. They have the toilet facility RIGHT BESIDE ME. I have this leash that they won't let me chew out (IV line) They shaved both my front legs. Strange people come in, pick me up and jab me with needles. They insist on doing strange things to other masters and (shudder) dogs. I can't walk around and smell everything (like my slaves let me do when I saw them the other day) My slaves don't visit often enough. One of these strange slaves does give me attention now and then. She seems to know a little about the proper feeding and caring for masters. "

Is there anything else that's bad master Tigger? I asked.

"Go away. I will not discuss what happened to me. Jabbed with needles, unspeakable things forced down my throat.... ugh....... I hope it was all a bad dream." he muttered

The vet did good things to Master Tigger. His kidney function seems to have gotten better. (I was sleeping, getting ready for night shifts when he was brought home. I'll get report from DW and pass it on for you folks who read "The Tigger Chronicles") When Tigger got home he came into the bedroom, where I was sleeping, and decided that I was making too much noise.

"Hey slave! You need to work and not make so much noise. I want to work in peace AND QUIET!"

I was groggy... and must have said something he couldn't understand.

"Speak up. Too much racket from that machine. (he's talking about my CPAP machine)

I rolled over and went back to sleep (I only have a very vague memory of what happened.)

Tigger must have gotten disgusted and left.
post #378 of 539
Thread Starter 
DW was somewhat amused when Tigger and Charlie both decided to get into the bathtub.

"Why are you laughing at us silly slave person?" both asked

I was wondering why you wanted to take a bath like your slaves do? DW replied

"Oooooooohhhhhh that's an ugly thought" Tigger said

"We will not stoop to slave standards!" Charlie remarked.


"Don't ask, slave." both said

(We think they both decided to drink from the faucet that was not completly closed and dripped)

["We're going to keep them guessing." both thought to themselves]

and both promptly left.


What was that marmalade blur? Tigger was now running in flaky mode. Run run run run.
STOP. Look around zoom......... he disappeared.

I happened to be turning into the hallway when I espied:

Zoom..... down the hall..... right turn into masters watering station.....

S L I P.... SLIDE..... right rear skid

"Don't remember this slave. I meant to do this little act of athletic prowess." Tigger mutterd

Yes master. I've... what were we talking about?

(I think he forgot that the floor was not carpet, but that's only a guess on my part. I have to think what he tells me.)

"Turn on this water, slave." he commanded

Yes master.

a short while later we captured Tigger, under the guise of giving him attention. We now have to give him fluids via a needle inserted just beneath the skin (Subcutaneous Fluid Therapy is the official term) because his kidney disease has progressed. Three times as week, as well as twice a day drugs squirted into the back of his throat. He looks like Cujo the evil right after this treatment since he foams at the mouth.

"You slave get mean. I think I'll take a break and rest by the heat vent to unwind from this new and evil act you do."

Yes master. We have to give you the drugs....

"Don't talk to me. I'm becoming a Library Lion."

Yes master. (I looked in later and he was in the dark surveying his front yard domain so I left him in quiet)
post #379 of 539
Thread Starter 
“Trials and Tabulations” By Tigger

Many years ago, we masters brought Egypt out of the dark ages and saved them from famine. They than worshiped us as gods. We deserved all that which they gave. (Bast, being the first to acknowledge the accolade was followed quickly by Bastet and they protected other masters and the female slaves). We masters have never forgotten, although slaves seem to need reminding from time to time.

My patience has come close to breaking these last few days. My primary slave and her slave have mistreated me. I shall elucidate:

Hi Tigger. You’re looking pleased with yourself today. (I was in the process of bathing) You also look in good shape. I should point out that your shaved leg bands remind me of….

“Don’t say it! IF you do I’ll hurt you. [I know he’s about to mention that I resemble that other race which slobbers, hangs out their tongues and moves their tails back and forth rapidly and has shaved legs and poufy tails] I’ll demonstrate my sharp claws upon you till you bleed! [shudder…. Dogs]

…..that I need a haircut. [good recovery, slave] I was NOT going to mention that you look like a pood……..

“Don’t say it!” I muttered

Ok. I’ll keep my mouth shut.

“Wise move.”

(Whereupon he picked me up. I thought he was going to give me attention and pet me.)

“Ah… kindness and attention for a change.” I purred

(I didn’t notice he was walking into the observation station room and that he closed the door)

“Hello primary slave.” I said to slave

She was hiding the needle behind her back. She abused my trust and JABBED in the back with that needle.


“Let me out of here! NOW!” I ordered.

Secondary slave stood up with some kind of bag that had a hose that went down to the needle.

“Oh… that hurts. You’re letting water trickle into me. I’m supposed to drink water. NOT WEAR IT! (stupid slave are in a hurt me kind of mood of late) What kind of drugs are you taking? Why have you become so abusive? Why did you take me to that evil person? You must have taken lessons from her because you’re doing the same thing to me that she did! Sticking needles in me. Feeding me bad food. Locking me in a cage. Too many bad things to mention.”

“They even had dogs!

“Have they been beating you on the head? (I know that seems strange, but those [shudder] dog things can be hit on the head and sides and it doesn’t bother them. They even chase after sticks and clubs. (is this all a bad dream?) Why are they treating me so badly?

It’s for you own good master. You need this water and liquid pills we squirt down your throat. It will help you with your kidney disease. [primary slave person said this while petting me. Stupid secondary slave just stood there and kept looking at the bag and hose]

They finally let me go, after removing that needle, so I ran away. I’m not getting close to them for awhile.
post #380 of 539
Aww, Master Tigger - sending you plenty of prayers and vibes, that the medical slaves make you all better
post #381 of 539
Thread Starter 
"Thank you for turning on the water, slave. Now go away."

Yes master. I hear and obey (retreating into the office whre I could observe when he had finished)

While keeping an eye out for master to finish, I heard the door opening. I espied master Fulff (alternate name for Shadow Ram) and Charlie cat RACING .....

Fluff and Charlie rounded the corner into the hall. Shadow Ram ahead by half a head. Charlie running like a marmalade blur.... Shadow a cat whisker behind. They round the corner into the watering station.

BAM.... Shadow has done a bounce turn off the door and LEAPS for the first step up to the station (we slaves would call it a toilet seat) and cuts offs off Charlie.

"AAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH I was winning. You cheated!" Charlie complained.

"No.... You just didn't think of it while running. You youngsters must learn all options available and be able to think while in a speedy situation." Shadow said.

"You two stop complaining. I'm trying to drink [heheheh I'm here drinking first] Tigger complained.

"Why don't you move over and let us drink?" they said

"I'm thirsty. I'm here first, so wait your turn."

"You drink enough for three cats and it takes too long." Shadow said.

"Patience young grasshopper. You must learn patience."

(I chuckled....)

"SLAVE! Why are listening in on private master communications?" Charlie grumbled

"Why are you trying to correct that slave? I'm the leader here and it's my job if more than one of us are present. I can and will allow it but you must ask for MY guidance." mater Tigger scolded Charlie.

"yes sir." Charlie said in a chagrined tone

"[youngsters take time to train]" Tigger thought

Tigger did a LONG stretch (methinks he wanted to rub in the "I'm first" and took his time leaving the watering station.

Shadow butted his head in to drink.

Charlie was almost tap tap tap tapping his claws, as I could tell he really was getting impatient, but he was restraining himself because he was youngest.

In the meantime, Tigger sauntered into the computer room/office. He went to the front observation and glanced outside. His quick survey revealed nothing that captured his interest so he walked around the back of the printer, over to the desk and stepped on the keyboard. (many complaints from the computer could be heard, but he ignored them)

"Whatcha' doing slave?" he inquired

I'm going to check THECATSITE and post some of your life. Many people like to read about you.

"Lemme see.... get out of the way!"

Uh.. it's difficult to get there when you're standing on the keyboard. The computer doesn't like it. (it was in the process of showing many strange boxes and windows. Help screens and the clock had appeared.

"Oh... alreight. I'll move. Study up and let me sit on your arm while I read that" he ordered.

Yes master (while I was closing all the helpful boxes he had opened.

THUMP.... (Fluff had jumped to the floor, as he was done drinking)

DW called out that he was done drinking.

Charlie's drinking now I replied

"Hey... take me to thecatsite"

Yes master. Look master. 17,800 views.

"Kewl... [I wonder how many that is. I know nothing of that slave invention - math] I think more slaves should read about me."

Yes master. I can't order them to read about your life you know.

"You think of a way to make them aware of me or I'll get upset with you and be cranky."
[I don't expect him to, but I have to keep him on claws and pointy sharp things] he said regally

Yes master (sigh)

THUMP.... Charlie had gotten down.

He's done DW called. Turn off the water.

I can't. I'm being held prisoner I replied.

Ok.. I'll turn it off she said.

"Please stop distracting him. I'm getting information." Tigger said

Yes master. I hear and obey. DW replied.

and Tigger leaped to the floor and walked away.

"Tell me about it later, slave." he called over his shoulder.

I was checking to see if I was bleeding deeply from the holes he had left behind when he decided to change his mind and depart.
post #382 of 539
Thread Starter 
(a short note about Tigger)
DW and I are starting to get concerned that master Tigger has stopped eating. It has been about 3 days since he has eaten. He has taken some tuna fish though. I'll keep everyone posted.

post #383 of 539
Oh, no!

for master Tigger.
post #384 of 539
Originally Posted by felton View Post
(a short note about Tigger)
DW and I are starting to get concerned that master Tigger has stopped eating. It has been about 3 days since he has eaten. He has taken some tuna fish though. I'll keep everyone posted.

Gosh I hope its nothing serious. Try offering water that tuna or chicken is boiled in if he's really not eating.

Many prayers and vibes for adorable Tigger, so he may feel well enough to continue with his antics as your master
post #385 of 539
Thread Starter 
Master Tigger looks thinner, but he does eat, after a fashion.

"Slave. HEY SLAVE! That roasted beast (I had grilled so beef that I let overcook just a smidgen) looks and tastes nice. Give me more.... I won't tell you again."

Yes master. We hear and obey

DW cut up and put it in a small baggie just for him.

"Ah... I like this. You've done well silly slaves." he remarked

"HEY!!! I want some too. " all the other masters complained

and thus they stated pestering us.

"Why does he get more than we do? Is it because he's alpha master?" each and all muttered.

He's not eating that much, because he's sick.We want him happy.


I'm sorry master. I was not looking where you darted so quickly. I ask that you give me advance warning when you're going to test my reflexes by running through my legs.

"Yeah yeah yeah. You blame me for your in adequate response time."

More beef?

"That will do."
post #386 of 539
Thread Starter 
"You are trying to poison me. That food is unacceptable. I want that London broil my primary slave was giving me!" Tigger told me

You really do need to eat this food so as to help with your kidney disease.

"I will not eat that ...... that.............. DOG FOOD!"

Yes master. I opened the chill box door and took out some chicken.

"Hmmm chicken is good. How about this:

Finiky feline finally finishes favorite fowl. " Tigger told me a little time later.

I see the allure of alliterative allucution has affected you.

but I was talking to a tail that was turning left to go down the hall. I had been dismissed.

"HEY SLAVE! I'm done eating. I want WATER!" he told me in a firm voice.

I put his bowl on the drain board after I had finished rinsing....

"HEY SLAV>.........." as he stopped abruptly as I was turning into the watering station.

I turned on the water and pet my master whilst he drank.

Charlie Cat came in and asked, while he was waiting:

"Why does he get all that good meat? I love London broil & chicken as well as any other master." he complained

I forgot about the london broil and let it overcook on the grill. Tigger likes it and was not eating his regular food. We had to get him to eat something or he would starve to death. We do NOT wish that to happen. I have some hamburger that I grilled you could eat.

"That will do." he muttered

Charlie followed me into the kitchen, but got distracted by all the white that was now outside (it had snowed heavly during the night.... schools closed, snow days abound etc.)

"Hey I can't see for all that white stuff. I was looking forward to nattering at birds as I did yesterday. It was warm and pleasant." he cried

Welcome to Colorado weather master. Wait 20 minutes and it will change

but he was now paying attention to the hamburger I had in my hand.

Hmmm food wins over flying.......

"Oh shut up and give me that food!" Charlie muttered

"Will you stop whining. I could hear you all the way down the hall and on the workstation." Tigger said

"Oh... are you over being cranky?" Charlie asked (Master Tigger had become Mr. Crankypants awhile earlier - his kidney disease results in horrid episoodes that are similar to awful hangovers to slaves and he gets cranky I had found out from DW who had researched his disease. We had given him IV fluids late last night and the extra fluids had resulted in a placid master)

"I can administer pain if you wish young kitten." Tigger said aloofly

"I bow to your age and wisdom" Charlie said [but I'll become alpha when you can't handle me... Charlie thought]

but Master Tigger was showing his tail...... as he walked away.

We were being ignored.
post #387 of 539
Thread Starter 
"SLAVE!" Tigger almost howled...

Yes master?

"I see that you have NOT updated my chronicles in quite some time. Why is that?" my master asked

I've been workin......

"I have not seen you on the workstation, where I spend a great deal of time. You don't have the work ethic we masters share." he interrupted

working. Yes I know, but do my work in a different place. I can take you there, if you would not object to the car ride.

"I am going to hurt you. You know I don't like that dirty, smelly obnoxious sounding..... thing" he muttered.

I've been at work or singing at choir.....

"Is that what you call that yowling?" he said with a grin (heheheheh)

choir practice. It's Holy week. Primary slave came into the computer roo....

"This is the master’s observation room. I keep telling you that." Tigger said regally.

"We like............ IS THAT ONE OF MY FAVORITE TOYS?!?!?!?!?! “Tigger shouted joyfully

Yes master. We just came back from what you call "Cat Toy Sunday" [we call it Palm Sunday but master Tigger has named it thus and so it shall ever be]

Master Tigger was dancing. Almost jumping several feet into the air to catch the elusive toy. Master Charlie ran into the room and danced almost as well as Tigger (he does really well for being short a hind leg)

JUMP .... swinging paw to catch.... bat at palm....... dance....

"Yawn.... that's boring" Master Shadow said as he sauntered by the door. He was off to work.

"HEY.... LET ME HAVE THAT!!!" both complained

"HA... I caught it. I caught it." Tigger exclaimed

"You cheated. You jumped in front me of and elbowed me out of the way!" Charlie muttered

"You kittens just don't know how it's done. I may... and you notice I said "may" teach you how it's done."

"Yeah yeah yeah.... just like you're going to teach me how to educate a dog. It can't be done." Charlie countered

but Tigger had walked away.

------------- insert about 10 minutes while we changed clothes-----------

"Pick me up slave."

Yes, master..........(Tigger was standing at the end of the bed and ordered me when I walked by)

purr purr purr purr....

"Let me stand on your shoulder, silly slave" [hehehehhe I'm going to get those toys that are on the dresser and silly slave can't figure it out hehehhehe ]

and I stood there.... just out of reach of the top of the dresser.

Master Tigger stood on my shoulder for a very long time.

"I must get those toys.... DRAT... just out of reach.... I can jump there and get those toys.... which way should I go when I have it in my mouth" Tigger thought.........

He was so intent on getting one of his favorite he didn't notice a small, slight movement away from the dresser.

"SLAVE! You're getting further and further away!"

Yes, master. I have to finish changing clothes and that means going over here.

"Sometimes I think you've been trained by primary slave. She doesn't like me clawing, chewing and dragging my toy around my domain."

I do listen to her....

Primary slave was chuckling....

"Oh stop laughing at me."

and Master Tigger jumped down off my shoulder and (almost) stomped away
post #388 of 539
Thread Starter 
"natter.........natter............natter...............natter" Charlie said, eyes getting big.... stooping down into a low crawl ready to pounce upon the bird he was stalking (difficult to do since he was behind glass doors... but he was getting ready)

"You young kittens really should remember you can't get those flying things. The silly slaves just won't let us outsid.......................I N T R U D E R A L E R T!!!!!!!" Tigger almost screamed

Master Tigger has espied a rather nice looking Siamese was was sauntering across the deck.

"STOP HIM [I'll deal with your opinion later slave] LET ME OUT TO SHOW HIM WHO"S BOSS!!!!" Tigger ordered loudly

"heheheheh You alpha cats have to worry territory. I don't have too.... heheheheh" Charlie chortled

I'll deal with you later.........

Zoooooommmmmm and Tigger was running down the hall (we had been in the living room)
I followed and caught the tail end of his tail disappearing into the bedroom. When I got there, he was a lump (behind the curtain) kinda hissing and growling

"I will tear you apart! Get out of my domain! I'll rip out your belly and "Tigger muttered

I opened the curtain and saw:

Nose to nose was Tigger and Intruder Cat.

"I'm out here. You can't do a thing. I can walk around and taunt you. I'm here, your there You can do a thing........ You can't do a thing....... " Intruder cat repeated, knowing he would just send Tigger through the roof.

He succeeded.

Tail fluffed out..... teeth ready to chew and claws flexing..... Tigger was ready for all out war, but I would not open the door.

"SLAVE! I am going to prove to that intruder I am master of this domain. Let me out!" Tigger ordered

No master. I will not.

Intruder cat was doing a long long stretch. Looking around, as if to decide where to mark his territory....

"He's going to mark................" Tigger watched him leave, walking along the top of the deck railing.

"He gone and I couldn't get out to mangle him." Tigger said pointedly

Yes master. He was doing it on purpose. He was trying to get you goat, and he succeeded from I can see.

"Go away!" Tigger settled down to keep watch on his domain.

"hehehehe You let him get away! You let him get away!" Charlie said as he walked in.

Tigger was not in the mood and started to become Mr. Crankypants, but I scooped him up and took him into the office, all the while petting and soothingly speak....

and closed the door. Master Tigger allowed himself about 30 seconds of petting...

"Let me down." he ordered.

and proceeded to explore the room, looking for new and different things to take his mind off intruder cat. (Tigger did not look outside to the front yard)

Charlie was trying to work, when I opened the door and Tigger went off down to the Kitty TV station.
post #389 of 539
Thread Starter 
"Whatcha doin', slave?" Tigger inquired

I'm getting ready for work.

"I've been working here all day, and I saw you working right there. (he pointed to my side of the bed) " Tigger said

"You don't work very well because you flop around, twitch and make loud noises. Has anyone of any intelligence taught you how to work? Oh.. wait. You're a slave and can't be taught because you don't remember." Tigger giggled

Yes, master. I understand, but I sleep there... and work someplace else.

"You try to work."

and I have to finish getting ready and go.

but I was talking to the tip of a tail that disappeared into the hall. I finished getting ready, and went to the kitchen.

"Feed me slave." Tigger ordered

I got a handful of solid food and placed it in his dish (hoping he'd be satisfied with his special kidney diet) and watched my master start eating.

"hmmm good food for a change." Tigger said with a mouth full.... [I'm not going to tell him I've been waiting for fresh food for hours and that I'd eat dog food.....did I just say dog ?? Oh... I must ge famished]

I was glad he decided to eat, since I was getting short on time. I retrieved my lunch and double checked to see if I had everyghing I was supposed to have.

See ya later Tigger. I'm off to work.

"Good. I'm need to get back to work." Tigger said as he trotted down the hall.

and off I went to work.

I went back inside to get my work ID card and keys and found Tigger sitting there.

"ahdheheheheheh ha ha hhehhehehe short trip? I thought you were going to work?" Tigger laughed

Yeah yeah... I forgot some stuff. I got distrated by your ..........

"Don't say it or I'm going to hurt you."

yes master. I hear and obey...... and picked up my keys and ID.

See ya.

"Make wure you bring back some good fish or chicken. I've taken a liking to it of late." Tigger ordered

Yes master. (we had plenty in the chill box, but I didn't mention that) I'll get prime chicken and fish just for you.

and I went to work.
post #390 of 539
Thread Starter 
A master, whose name shall remain unkown, so as to not embarass him (but he did have an affinity to sitting on ones lap and his names starts with lap) was standing outside the watering station he prefers. (we salves call it the master bathroom) DW was inside, but with the door only partially closed, doing something that involved the sliding glass door for the tub/shower. DW noticed one of the masters feet under the door and his attempting to close the door, thereby locking her inside.

We can only guess why our master would wish to lock her inside, because if he were trying to open the door, he would be pushing the door in the wrong direction.

as an aside: Our masters are always smarter than we slaves, because we can be referred to as "dumber than a box of rocks" or "one french fry short of a ......" you get the idea. I would never insult a master by calling him a walking rock or such.

Whose paw is that trying to lock me in? DW inquired

"Drat..... I've been caught. I got distracted by that other slave. My joke has been discovered." my master said

Whereupon my master jumped up on the workstation and came over to me. He covered up by asking to be fed.

"I'm dying of hunger here. You must feed me!" he ordered

You were given some food not less than 3 hours ago. You can't be starving.

"Will you listen to me or not? When I tell you I'm dying of hunger, I'm HUNGRY!"

Yes master. I heard that you're full and taht we should feed you in 5 hours. We hear and obey.

"WHAT! I said no such thing. I'm hungry. I want food!" he almost shouted

Yes master. No food.

and he left in disgust.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: The Cat Lounge
This thread is locked  
TheCatSite.com › Forums › General Forums › The Cat Lounge › We've taken on a new cat - Tigger