We've taken on a new cat - Tigger

The wake up call I received today was somewhat unusal. Tigger, Shadow Ram and Charlie must have been playing follow the leader because each one of them decided to jump up onto the bed and wake me up. In quick succession they landed on the bed and used me as a launch pad to jump to the other side of the bed. They promptly went to work and they ignored me one and all.

"Why are you looking at me that way slave?"
"Go away and leave us"

so I got up and got ready for work, albeit a bit early.

I was standing at the intersection of the hall/kitchen/front door/short hall to living room having a conversation with my master Tigger:

"Pick me up and pet me slave. I want attention"

Tigger was not in sight of the slaves/masters who are in the kitchen. DW had gone downstairs and let my masters Shadow Ram & Charlie up. As is his wont, Shadow Ram raced to the guest bathroom for a drink of water. Charlie was not that far behind.

And their off. Shadow Ram has the lead making the turn into the kitchen followed closely by Charlie.

Shadow Ram is ahead by a length passing the stove. Charlie is making up ground.

Shadow Ram is ahead by half a length as they pass the refrigerator. Setting up for the turn into the hall.

Shadow Ram makes the turn. Charlie is taking the turn wide so he misses his slave Felton.

Shadow Ram has a glancing collision with Tigger. Charlie makes his turn.

Tigger raises his paw to slap Shadow Ram but Shadow Ram evades and is going too fast.

They are neck and neck passing the hall closet.

Charlie makes the turn into the guest bathroom first but forgets about the slick floor. Charlie slides into the door and has stopped.

Shadow Ram makes the turn and makes it to the sink first.

I abandon Tigger to see what's going on in the bathroom, but I notice Tigger is following at a much slower pace.

I make the turn into the bathroom and see Shadow Ram is first in the waterline. Charlie is sitting on the toilet.

I turn on the water and taking advantage of the fact that my arm is between the water flow and Shadown Ram, Tigger jumps up to go to the head of the line.

Tigger waits for the water to get cold (I think that's what he did)

Shadow Ram is right at the edge of the sink. Waiting..............

Charlie jumps up to the sink and puts his front half into the sink so he can drink water from the puddle of water (he doesn't like to drink directly from the flow of water, but doesn't mind if it's not cold water. Warm water will do)

Tigger is somewhat offended by the youngster jumping ahead of him but takes it gracefully.

Tigger turns around and tells me:

"Pet me. I want attention because this young person took advantage of me. I'm a little put out so pet me."

I pet Tigger for the entire time that Charlie drinks. Shadow Ram is older than Charlie so he waits patiently.

Charlie leaves and Tigger starts drinking.

I leave because I know that Tigger will take quite a bit of time drinking because of his kidney disease.

[flashback to yesterday]

The primary slave of Tigger has gone to visit her sister for the weekend. Once a year this occurs because DW can show off her new yarn (or at least a large portion of her stash) and leave whatever yarn my SIL has fondled and likes. SIL is living on a fixed income as her DH has retired and we try to help in the little things. Yarn / quilting materiel / computer support (I fix computers) and different sorts of the ilk are freely given. Niece person is getting married this August so sewing / knitting of objects are in progress for the wedding.

The great straw hunter has been out and about. Tigger LOVES to play with a straw now and again. His entire demeanor will change with LOUD meoows of a particular volume / timbre heard throughout the house. Occasionally he will strut through the house and display his catch. He will sometimes deposit the straw at the feet of a slave or put it on a particular slaves pillow. I was the last recipient. There are times when the straw is, how shall I say this, is rather gooey. Moist from mastication is an apt description. All of his slaves will react as if it is a great gift and praise Tigger if we happen to be there when he deposits his kill. We thank Tigger for his magnanimous nature since we rarely get gifts from our masters. [other than the occasional hairball, which doesn't count as a gift I suppose]

I was sitting at the computer when Tigger came in and jumped up upon my lap. He immediately went into baby burp position (I'm sure that anyone who has held a baby and burpped a baby will remember the position) and told me to pet him.

"Pet me slave. I'm emotionally needy right now. My slave is NOT HERE!"

I proceed to pet Tigger and he bonks my cheek. (Tigger has just finished eating and he has kibble breath.

"This is a treat for me Tigger. Thank you for deciding I really need to have a face full of cat hair and to know that you have kibble breath. Thank you"

"You need a reminder now and again slave that I am a rather special master to you."

"Thank you again Tigger. I appreciate your thoughtfullness"

and eyes glaze over. Purring

purring

(I think it's turned to snoring, but it's difficult to determine this as Tigger is so close to my head. I'm leaned back in this chair and while I am petting Tigger with my left hand, I'm slowly typing this chronicle for those of you who decide to read this. Right handed typing / leaned back in chair / petting my master Tigger all at the same time while being graced with kibble breath. I recommend this to one and all. )

[insert the following classical music while I pet Tigger during his working. I can listen to KVOD classical radio online]

9:22 am \tFelix Mendelssohn: Piano Concerto #2 in d Op 40
\t\tGewandhausorchester / Kurt Masur
\t\tCyprien Katsaris, piano
\t\tWarner Classics 62769

\t
9:44 am \tLeo Delibes: Coppelia: Suite
\t\tPhiladelphia Orchestra / Eugene Ormandy
\t\tSony 46550

The phone rings..........

This startles Tigger and he awakens. I can barely reach my cellphone and I answer (using the speaker phone mode). Tigger looks at me with some askance as he has been disturbed from his work. It is the primary slave of Tigger and his ears perk up.

"PRIMARY SLAVE! WHERE are you? I require your presence here and I want you here NOW!"

"I'm sorry Tigger. I'll be home Sunday evening"

Tigger seems a little put out by this statement and he decides that he must punish me by applying little needle claws for a short (thankfully) while. He than gets down and stretches.

Tigger walks away.

I am describing these actions to DW / primary slave as they occur and she apologizes to Tigger.

Tigger will have nothing to do with this.

We, DW and I, are ignored and put in our place for offending Tigger.

our life with Tigger continues on.

I was going down the hall, about to depart for work when I noticed Tigger at the guest sink. He had been drinking and was now full. He turned around and jumped down to the floor.

[occurring at the same time]

Charlie was winning the race to the guest bathroom (between Charlie and Shadow Ram) and he makes the turn into the bathroom.

The instant Charlie made the turn into the bathroom Tigger started his drop to the floor.

Charlie and Tigger attempted to occupy the same place at the same time.

"HEY get out of the way I'm going to land on your back"

"Why didn't you yell out that you were jumping here?"

It's a good thing that Charlie is the middle linebacker of our masters because receiving a flying tackle would have really hurt Tigger if he had been on the receivning end of the jump.

Charlie did a stop, drop and roll and recovered nicely. He than jumped to the sink.

Tigger stopped and started bathing himself. (DW and I are of the opinion that our masters will stop and bath themselves if they don't know what to say or what to do)

and I went to work.

Tigger is somewhat beside himself right now. We have a Beautiful day. Partly cloudy. 72 degrees (about as I'm guessing right now) Gentle breeze. Doors and windows open.

and intruder cat has been spotted.

So Tigger is running from window to window to door to back door to Kitty TV. He will spend some time looking for intruder cat and move on to the next vantage point where he thinks intruder cat will be.

That and Tigger wants to go outdoors (with or without a leash) to have a meeting or to go exploring.

"MEOOWWW! I want to go outside slave!"

"Let me out"

"Why don't you let me out?"

Tigger decided that since we were not letting him go outside he would punish us by demanding different food in his bowl. Since we have to stand guard while he eats he's been eating just a few kibbles and leaving. He will return in about 30 seconds (after we've put his food bowl away so the other masters will not eat his food) to demand food. He will than not eat until we have replaced the food with new food or the other special kidney diet food. One looks like little pellets and the other type looks like a childs jacks (as in bouncing ball and jacks) so we call the food "balls or jacks depending on the shape)

Tigger will than run to the sink for water. A waterline develops and none of our masters will tell they're done drinking so we have to keep checking.

Slave torture at its finest.

ah... life with our masters continues......

A master (whose name I suspect will rhyme with Digger) left 4 claw sheaths and a whisker on my office room chair. Rather untidy of him and I said so.

"What is your problem slave? I recall that was one of the tasks I assigned to you when I came to this household, so stop your whining."

and he proceded to start to run down the hall.

and he turned back after 3 feet. He decided to get water instead.

and he turned back to the kitchen after 3 feet because he must have decided to eat first.

and he turned back to get water.

(since I was following I suspect he was playing games with me because I complained about an untidy master)

On the fourth time, Tigger finally decided to eat.

"HEY SLAVE! Feed me"

I put down his food bowl and it has the spike food. (We have a choice of giving him two types of kidney diet food. He will, upon occasion, turn up his nose at one and demand the other.)

"HEY SLAVE! I want the other food"

Ok.. I change out his food.

and Tigger decides he doesn't want that either so he shakes his paw at the food and he wanders off, leaving me behind.

I've displeased a master again. sigh....

I was getting ready for bed, which involves a procedure that most folks do not have to do; i.e. bringing in Tigger food, water bowl, litter box, setting up a BiPap machine (I stop breathing for long periods when sleeping so medical science dictates that I have air forced into my lungs when sleeping. I thinks it's to muffle my snoring but DW or my Dr. don't belive that. I've noticed that many of my theories are discounted. hmmm) (back to the primary issues of this sentence) and putting chapstick on my lips. It's the last thing I do prior closing the mask and turning off the light because I put on my mask while laying down or I'd get tangled up in hoses and that's awkard. (I live in a semi arrid climate and my lips chap. I also seem to drool so combine that with the semi arrid climate and my lips are toast. Therefore I put a thick layer of chapstick on and my lips get refreshed overnight. The BiPap mask prevents my rubbing off of the chapstick, which is a good thing. I used M&M chocolate flavored (yummy smell and people can smell it across a room) that DW got. She can no longer eat chocolate because it causes a migrane. Bummer for her but she can use the chocolate chapstick.

Having just applied a thick layer of chapstick, Tigger decides to climb up onto the bed and he decides that he want to bonk against me. Ahhhhh he loves me. bonk bonk his head against me.

I suppose you have guessed what happened. One thick layer of chapstick and one Tigger who seems to be able to leave at least 7 thousand cat hairs wherever he wishes and it appears that he does NOT lose the hair from one spot thereby he does not have a bald spot. I was not quick enough putting on the mask. Tigger timed the entire operation perfectly.

"Ahh.... I'm going to bonk your head / lips to show that I love you"

"What's your problem slave? Don't like my attentions?"

"Ok. I'll go bother my primary slave"

and he leaves me to my task of removing a layer of cat hair that is now covering my lips. (I think he did it on purpose, but I'll not give him the satisfaction of his knowing that. I'll let him think he got away with a little bit of slave abuse)

DW is laughing at me as I apply another layer of chapstick. Tigger has settled down for the night.

"Turn off that light slave."

Yes master.......

Tigger and I did the hallway dance this morning prior to my going to work. The difference was that he blocked my passage down the hall by the guest bathr.... err... the master drinking station (I think I should start calling it that since the only people who use it are my masters)

I went left, Tigger went right. Tigger blocked my passage.

I went right, Tigger went left.

I started to step over but Tigger objected vocally.

"Go into the drinking station slave. I'm thirsty."

uh... are you thirsty Tigger?

Looking at me as if I'm blind or just plain stupid, Tigger again voices his desire.

"I'm thirsty"

Oh.... and I start into the drinking station. Tigger follows and proceeds to start drinking. He must have been really thirsty since he didn't wait for the water to get cold.

"You may go slave. I'm going to be drinking for awhile."

So I head down the hall and tell DW that master Tigger is drinking.

Time to go to work....

Tigger has been in a strange kind of mood today. Flaky this morning and

"I need attention slave"

"I'm thirsty slave. Give me water."

"I'm hungry"

for the last half hour. Primary Tigger slave (DW is out shopping) is not at home.

I'm standing in the kitchen when I hear the garage door open. Ah.. DW has returned.

I'm in the process of putting down a fresh bowl of food (dots this time since Tigger did not want the spike food and he wanted the dot food to be FRESH which means I have to pour the old food into the jar and grab a handful of new food)

and Tigger is hungry. He's about to eat.

DW is coming through the door.

Looking left to the food.

Looking over where DW can be heard.

"Oh Oh Oh Oh... I want both RIGHT NOW"

indecision

"What should I do?"

Thankfully DW comes over and picks Tigger up and gives him attention. I'm standing there with his food.

and I place the food on the floor and Tigger is put on the floor by the food.

"Ah.... food and my slave here. Doesn't get much better"

and I get ignored.

[inset interlude about my other masters]

Shadow Ram lost the race and thus wound up as second in the water line behind my master Tigger. He decided to turn around, while standing very close to the edge of the sink, and while doing so thought that demonstrating the law of gravity to all would be an excellent lesson. He landed on all fours.

Charlie and Tigger were rather amused and kept from laughing aloud. DW commented that it was nice that he had decided to show his agility (she related the situation to me) to everyone present.

A short time later, we were watching TV, with our masters Shadow Ram, Charlie and Laptop. DW was sitting with her legs outstretched, with no shoes or sock on. Our master Shadow Ram has a habit, which is different than most. He will bath any of the slaves who have recently, or are in the process of giving him attention. His tongue will get somewhat tiresome if he decides that he wants to clean that patch of skin all the way to the bone.
He will hold my hand down with his paw so I can not withdraw out of range. He had been cleaning DW (her toes) when I started giving a scritch. He placed his hand holder on me, and started the rasp. DW remarked that he could not control his licker.

I groaned.

and Shadow Ram just kept going.

Oh well. Life continues with our masters

Tigger was complaining that he was dying of starvation and I fed him dots. (we call his special kidney food dots or spikes because of the shape) Tigger has only wanted dots of late and he will turn up his nose (he shook his paw at the spikes one time a short time ago) at the spikes. We have to stand guard over the food so that we can pick up the dish and put it away as all the other masters will eat his food. I just now noticed (and we've had Tigger 4 years? - shows you how observant I am) that Tigger will eat his food and leave hemispheres of food in the bowl. Imagine a sphere and think of Tigger a giant who eats the sphere. Tigger will only eat one hemisphere at a time. The equator is almost a perfect line. One side empty and the other has food.

"You just now noticed that slave?"
"I've been eating that way my entire life."
"Why did I ever select you as a slave? I must have been feeling nice so that I could help you, the handicapped slave that you are."
"My other two slaves noticed this long ago."
"Will I have to send you back to school?"

"Oh go away slave. I'm much too tired as I've been working all day"

and I slink away somewhat embarrased.......

I had been downtown at the Cherry Blossom Festival (where I washed dishes for five hours since we volunteered because our son gets martial arts training there) when Tiggers wants attention. He jumps up on my lap as I'm in the process of taking off shoes.

pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;

[insert 10 minutes]

pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me;pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; pet me; Ok..... that's enough.

"FEED ME!"

"I changed my mind. I want to drink first."

"Now you can feed me"

"What are you looking at slave? You've never seen anyone eat before?"

Tigger than saunters off to go to work on the couch.

and I'm ignored.

I was sleeping today (I have the night shift tonight) when Tigger comes into the room, jumps up on the bed (so far I have not detected this as I'm a quasi heavy sleeper) than decides that I would make a warm pillow. Tigger circles around my midsection, circles around my midsection, circles around my midsection and finally decides he has found the perfect spot. (I'm barely awake and recognize that Tigger has settled down to do some work - I go back to sleep) Tigger continues to work.

[insert an unknown number of hours]

Tigger decides to get up and have a break since he has been working oh so hard.

S T R E T C H.....and little needles come out to stretch his toes

I feel the little needles and awaken. Nancy is watching BTW (she is folding cloths) .... I open one eye and look at Tigger.

"You have never seen me get up and stretch slave?"

Tigger shakes his head in disgust, and starts stretching in the other direction
and he finally moves.

I go back to sleep.

Tigger goes to do a Tigger something and leaves me alone (I think he may returned to work, but he didn't wake me up and I think that's nice of him.

zzzzzzzzzz

I have been talking with my mother in law about the Tigger Chronicles and I'm supposed to pass on some information. Oliver (he has crossed the Rainbow Bridge) was the sidekick of Tigger and he had crossed the Rainbow Bridge a short time prior to Tigger having been diagnosed with kidney disease. Tiggers health had started to go down hill (MIL/FIL are on a fixed income) and they could not afford to care for Tigger the way my DW and I are capable of. They did not want Tigger to suffer (if he was end stage) as they dot not want ANY pet to suffer. So the combination of 4 other cats (who could be a companion to Tigger) potential of a costly kidney disease, limited income it was decided that Tigger would be happier here. Tiggger still likes MIL/FIL because he abuses them when they come over.

MIL has asked me when I'm going to publish the Tigger Chronicles and that she also wants a "baby burp" picture since Tigger never did that with them.


Gryn

I just got home when I was informed:

"I'm thirsty slave. Follow me to the master watering station"

I follow

I turn the corner into the watering station when I spy Charlie is relaxing in the sink.

Tigger is GLARING at Charlie and tells him to move.

Charlie ignores him.

Tigger once again tells Charle he should move out of the sink.

Charlie looks at me:

"What does this little cat want of me? I'm resting and staying cool."

I tell Charlie that I'll take Tigger to the secondary watering station.

I pick Tigger up and take him into what is normally the master bath.

"Why am I supposed to drink here? I don't like this water!"

Tigger refuses to drink here.

So I take Tigger in and put him on the edge of the sink. I pick up Charlie and turn on the water.

Tigger starts to drink.

Charlie tells me:

"Why didn't you say you were going to turn on the water. I'm thirsty too."

Charlie starts to push Tigger out of the way, but decides to wait when he gets glared at again.

When Tigger gets done, Charlie starts drinking.

"Go away slave. I wish to drink in solitude."

so I go away.

Tigger was in "Lets test our masters" mode today.

"Feed me slave"

and he chose not to eat.

"I'm not hungry now slave"

"Give me attention"

"Go away. I don't want to be handled"

"I'm hungry. Primary slave... feed me!"

and he finally eats.

"I'm thirsty now. Follw me to the masters watering station."

and he goes back to the kitchen.

"I'm thirsty now. Turn on the water."

The forth time is when he finally decides to drink.

DW and I are laughing and asking Tigger why he's in such a mood.

Tigger decides that he has to go to work ont he bed.

I had to go back to bed since I have the night shift and Tigger decides that I have a master walk up and down my back. Thank you Tigger.

My master Tigger was having a "I can't decide moment" today when we got home. We had been to sons Naginata class (a Japanese martial art), some shoping and a Dr. appointment which meant we were out 10 hours. DW had gone downstairs to feed the horde while I was upstairs with Tigger. We left sufficient food and water for Tigger since Tigger will only eat enough to be full and leave the rest. The horde will eat all that's put down so we feed them 3 times a day. Almost enough water to flood a small house is left out for them (uh... maybe I exaggerate the amount but we leave enough for all) I could almost hear the screams that they were starving as DW went downstairs. Tigger was at the intersection of the kitchen and hall down toward the master watering station. Poor Tigger could not make up his mind what he wanted more. Fresh food or water.

"Decisions decisions why do these slaves do this to me!"

"I want fresh food"

"Oh I've changed my mind. I want water."

Back and forth... two steps one way and four steps back

change mind... four steps back two forward....

I see that Tigger had plenty of food so I pick him up and take him to the masters watering station.

I turn on the water and wait for Tigger to drink. He waits for the water to get cold and I give him lots of attention.

DW has finished feeding the horde and I hear the race for the water. Charlie rounds the corner first and makes a slide turn and jump to the first rung of the water line ladder (we slaves call it a toilet) and another jump the second rung (top of toilet) and he stops. He realizes that Tigger has been obscured by me and that Tigger is drinking. Knowing well that Tigger "may" take a very long time to get full Charlie drops into "inscrutable observation mode" (that's almost like "Library Lion" mode but is different that the eyes don't roll up under the eye lids) Eyes are intent upon the water waiting to pounce as Charlie must be dying of thirst. He hasn't told me but I think I can recognize the behavior.

Shadow Ram is waiting on the first rung.

Shadow Ram YAWNS so I tell Tigger that he may want to finish up.

Tigger looks at me and than at Charlie.

"These underlings waiting for water affect me how?"

"I'll finish when I'm done and not until."

Yes master. I hear and obey.

Tigger backs out the head in the sink position and looks at me. I take this as a order to pick him up and do so. Charlie fills the empty space in a flash.

"I'm not done drinking slave. Why did you pick me up?"

Oh... I'm sorry Tigger. I thought you were done.

"WhydoIpupupwiththesestupidslaves? sigh..... "

I'll give you some attention.

"Oh.. oh oh oh... that's the spot. Keep it up.... yes...."

"Ok put me down."

I do and Tigger saunters off to complain to DW that I've been a stupid slave.

and I have to give attention to the other masters at the watering station

"HEY Slave! I'm thirsty"

(Shadow Ram was yelling from the master watering station)

Yes master. I will come and turn on the water for you - and go through the ritual of "pet me pet me pet me till the water gets cold"

Finally Shadow Ram starts to drink. The waterline forms (Tigger and than Charlie)

I go back into the bedroom and lay down at the end of the bed and watch a DVD that we got through Netflix (Nova - Monster of the Milky Way) [DW, son and I like science minded shows and learning shows; Science channel - along with some SG-1, CSI and a couple other shows "Good Eats" etc] DW is sitting on the bed with her laptop (mine is a company laptop)

In any case, we're giving rapt attention to the TV when Master Tigger comes in. Ah.. Hi Tigger.

I'm laying across the end of the bed. DW is sitting so imagine a right triangle with the hypotenuse missing. Master Tigger walks over to the intersect and shakes his head.

DW and I get a shower.

Oh thank you master. We needed a shower. How did you ever know?

"That's why I'm a master and you're a slave silly human."
and Tigger starts bathing.

Shadow calls to the watering station. (just as I'm settled in mind you)
I go in and proceed to give him attention. Tigger comes running in and cuts the line to drink (it's nice to be boss eh Tigger?) Tigger drinks and backs out to leave.

(in a whisper so that the other masters will not hear .... you meant to do that Tigger?) Tigger had backed out and both back legs slipped off the edge of the sink.

"I meant to do that slave. I did it to see how quickly you would respond and how you would catch me. You were [almost] adequate. Pay more attention when I'm drinking and not to that other wanna be alpha. Shadow and Charlie looked away from the scene as to not to let Tigger know they had observed the gaffe. Looking at the ceiling or floor by the tub.

"Hey Charlie. Look at that upper corner. See far away it is?"

That's polite of them.

When everyone is done drinking I go back to watching TV. Tigger comes in and settles down on my legs. He prefers a warm layupon so as not to get cold. Therefore I am now being held prisoner. DW tells me that eyes have rolled back into his head. A short time later we hear snoring so Tigger has gone to work and left us without adult supervision. The occasional twitch and little needle claws to get my attention occur.

I wish I had the work ethic that our masters have.

When DW and I started getting ready for bed, we brought our masters food/water bowl (it seems strange that Tigger will deign to drink out of a bowl but he doesn't always wake us - I guess he's being nice to us) and potty box. Tigger got down from his "seat thief" position and ate a few kibbles. DW turned down her side of the bed, when Tigger jumped up and DOVE under the sheets. Tigger decided to go splunking instead of ostrich mode.

"Ah.. this is such great fun searching for prey. Thank you slaves."

We could not help ourselves.... Tigger made us do it - we played tag. Tigger would pounce on the movement. We would make movements in a different place..... POUNCE.

Tigger had great fun. When he was done he stuck his head out....

S T R E T C H E D

and fell over. Tigger was overtired.

We had to gently lift up this limp noodle of a marmalade cat and put him on Annie (giant plush stuffed ladybug) that was at the end of the bed. Tigger chose to go to work and we went to bed.

We were settled in and Tigger decided he should go for a walk on the bed. Around the bed, over recumbent slaves, back and forth at least 5 times.

He finally settled down to work.

and we went to sleep.

"WHERE were you! You've been gone HOURS!"

"AND YOU SMELL OF OTHER CATS!"

and the marmalade monster was out. Cranky cat did NOT like us being gone for so long or we smelled of other cats. The horde just told us they were hungry and let it go at that. DW went to feed them while talked with Tigger.
It took a little bit of explaining but he finally understood. I had to tell him that we located the original evil vet report that estimated him to be 12 weeks old when DW was selected as a slave. Full medical history taken, ear mites treated, along with conjuctivitis (if I remember correctly) so we have all the records. That means Tigger is older than we thought (15 years old) and evil vet will be pleased to know we have all the history that slaves should provide.

It took some long and mild explainations to tell him we had visited friends (source where we were selected as slaves by Shadow Ram, Laptop and Sterling) as well as a visit to father/mother in law where he had lived so long.

When he settled down I put more food down when he asked.

Have you ever gotten a blank look from a master that sez

"Why do I have this person as a slave? I ask for food and he doesn't get me fresh food."

(I had gone through the process of opening the food jar, pouring the old food in and getting new food. I showed him every step of the process but my efforts were apparently not good enough [maybe because I'm not primary slave] to please him. I go through the process again.)

"I'll sniff this batch to see if it's good. The last batch was no good."

sniff sniff sniff

"I'm only eating this because I want to make you feel that you're trying. [very trying at times slave] You really should be re-trained if you want to serve me."

Yes master. I hear and obey....

DW is laughing at this exchange. (He abused me last time she sez)

5 kibbles are eaten and he goes to the master watering station and makes me give lots of attention while the water gets cold.

"Go away slave. I'm drinking. I may or may not tell you I'm done so you can turn off the water so check back often."

"sigh.... I told you to go away. Have you been lobotomized? Were you dropped on your head or a combination of both? Go away."

Yes master. I hear and obey.

"HEY SLAVE! I'm thirsty."

I hear this in the kitchen so I go down the hall to the master watering station. Tigger is standing on the floor looking up at me.

Yes Tigger?

"Pick me up and turn on the water."

Do you really expect me to pick you up? You don't have a broken leg.

"I said to pick me up!"

Ok. I pick him up and turn on the water.

"Pet me pet me pet me"

I expected this so I pet him till the water is cold. Tigger gets his head wet again and tastes the water.

Tigger looks at me with some askance and tells me the water is not cold.

I'm sorry Mr. Quiver Tail (a nickname because he will stand and quiver his tail rather quickly) that the water is not cold.

Whereupon Tigger fawaps his tail once and he stalks off. I'm guessing he was testing again since his head had not dried from his previous drink that he forced DW to give him. I just happened to be the slave selected/responded to his call.

I'm an easy target I guess.