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I'm really in need of some good ears. - Page 2

post #31 of 48
Wow Cindy you've got things moving. Good on you. Glad you are feeling a lot better today.
post #32 of 48
Your heading in the right direction chick!!

But don't expect overnight miracles!. It's been over a year now since Richie and i split, and i'll be honest there are days when he comes into my head very easily because after living with someone for nearly 5 years you can't erase them from your mind all together.

When we first started seeing each other, "Simply Red" was OUR music, and what was playing on the radio at work this morning? Star by Simply Red.

As long as you make sure that you never lose your friends you will never be alone

And be strong like you are at not ringing him, it's his loss at the end of the day because your worth more than that.

And Sandys right it is mental abuse!, Richie would "try" and play mind games with me until i started calling his bluff!!.
post #33 of 48
Hi Cindy,
You rock. You've got stuff goin' ON and that's the best. I would definitely heed rosiemac's words above in that it takes a long time, sometimes longer than expected because we want the pain to go away FAST, and it can linger. Every relationship beats to its own drum, but some bang in our heads louder and longer. Two Excedrin, bubble bath with upbeat music and kitties and friends. That's what it's all about. Even though I am so far beyond where I was then, with Mr. Dysfunctional-Passive-Aggressive-Money Moocher, I still have visions of him finding me and trying to wreck everything I've rebuilt. But ya know what? Just like the President, I have created my "inner circle" - that fortress took the past 4 years to build and it is a network of friends, family, and resources around the sprawling metropolis of Maple Valley ( ) that will fly in formation if I raise the flag when trouble comes. Building my "inner circle" was the best thing I've ever done in my life and although I should've done it at 25, it's in place now.
post #34 of 48
I know what you are going through. I felt like such a failure when I divorced my husband. Now, I wouldn't go back to him.
post #35 of 48
I'm glad things are starting to look better, but like they said it will still linger around you.. but that's not a bad thing.. a year from now you can go.. "I remember him and he was a *beep* and I hope that if I'm ever in a situation like that again I won't sit there and let it get the better of me. Because I learned from that whole crappy experience.
I've found that generally the electric company is willing to switch who the bill belongs to as long as there is proof of residence to that apartment. they don't give two poos who pays as long as they get money.
I hope things stay positive with you.. don't be afraid to call out to us if you have any needs.

post #36 of 48
I am glad to hear things are going better for you.
post #37 of 48
Cindy....I just read this! My heart is with you....please know we all care about you alot and I will be thinking of you and praying for you. You did the right thing....any man who is making drug deals is one to get rid deserve better! I am glad to hear you are thinking of your education....are you thinking of going back to school? I did, and it was/is the best decision I ever made! And when you mentioned that you had lost friends because of your relationship with me....any friends you lost because of this were not real friends to begin with...I learned the hard way...a friend is one who sticks with you through thick and thin...does not desert you in a time of need. The others were not really friends so don't even think twice about them...other than pray for them, but they are the ones who have to answer to God for how they treated you. And you asked how someone could love someone so much and yet hate them....I have felt like that before with my husband. But only when I am just fed up with it...mostly I love him. You did do the right thing by kicking this man out....he has cheated on you and does deserve WAY are a beautiful person inside and out and don't you ever forget it! *hugs* We are here for you, hun!
post #38 of 48
Debby, I have to disagree on what you said about friends....sometimes friends can't just sit idly by and watch someone they care about make mistake after mistake after mistake in their eyes. Or they may tell the person they care about straight up what a mistake they are making and in doing so "destroy" the friendship because the person in the relationship can't see, or won't see the situation they are in. People on the outside of the situation can see it, but as they say, Love Is Blind. When they finally see the truth, they may realize what good friends they had to begin with...

Spoken from personal experience...
post #39 of 48
Thread Starter 
Well as for my friends...........They got tired of me calling them and crying to them about what an *** he was, They just stopped returning my calls. I am slowly getting them to call me. And slowly getting them to talk to me. It turns out that my Ex is going to be going to jail in 2 weeks since he can't get the money to pay for a ticket he got. The funniest thing about it is that around the time he's sitting in jail, There will be a warrent out for him because of his past due Child Support. So Instead of getting only a week's worth of time he's going to end up sitting in there for 6 months or so. He called me yesterday to ask to get his mail. Then proceeded to tell that in 2 weeks he will be droping off "a package" of stuff that he has of mine that he doesn't need.....Such as his Cell phone. which was a birthday present from me. I just hope that in this "package" is my computer LOL Haven't been feeling to bad actually spent the whole weekend at home feeling pretty good!!! Just a little stressed over some money matters. But those will clear up hopfully by the middle of July. But doing really great!!!!

I even got transfered to a hospital that I have wanted to work at for awhile now it's only a temp position but still totally new surroundings and actually in a hospital instead of this wearhouse I'm at(in case you guys are wondering why I am in a wearhouse moving to a Hospital....I'm a medical Records File clerk. I send the records from this wearhouse to the hospital. But the place I am giong to now keeps all their records at the hospital. So no more Wearhouse!!!!!) I start that tuesday nite! I don't know if they have access to the internet so it may be awhile before I can get back on. I don't know for sure. But I will be sure to let everyone know.

P.S. thank you everyone! You have all said things that has kept me strong in keeping him out of my life. I am very thankful that I foudn this site almost a year ago. You all are wonderful!
post #40 of 48
Cindy, Congrats on getting the transfer! Continue to keep your chin up and you'll be just fine!

post #41 of 48
Cindy your doing great girl

Let him go to jail, he put himself there, but remember this!. When he finally gets out, be prepared for him ringing you up and telling you that after being holed up in prison he's a changed man?!.
post #42 of 48
Glad things are finally looking up, Cindy! Congratulations on the new job! Please let us know how you like it!
post #43 of 48
Thread Starter 
oh I know just what to expect from him. and yup he will be calling me when he gets out. it's his nature. let him call let him sob I'm done with it all.

As for the job so far so good. I do have internet access so I should be able to continue posting on here like I was before. I'm so excited! I'm actually working in a hospital!!!!!!!!!!!!! But only until Aug then back to a wearhouse. But I know that once I got this taste of it in a hospital I am sure going to work my butt off to get back into it LOL it's just so AWESOME!!! it's kind of a dream come true! I can't wait until I get started in school and finally reach my dream of being a Nurse Soon......REAAAALLLLLYYYYYY soon Anyway things are going great. I actually have a date on my next day off.....Don't know when that is but it's already been planned that we are gonna go out. Just friends for now not ready to go any further just yet. But it will be nice to go out and actually not have to pay for it LOL. Anyway time to go back to work I will for sure keep you all updated
post #44 of 48
Cindy it just gets better!.

I'm so happy your a lot stronger, and even more happy that you love the job.

I'm pleased your taking it easy by not jumping into a relationship, and like me your not putting every man in the same bracket as your ex, because a lot of women who have been hurt think all men are like there ex partners but their not.

Keep it up girl!
post #45 of 48
You seem to have travelled a long way in a short time Cindy. Good for you.
post #46 of 48
Read all the posts -wow lots of stuff going on but hopefully the worst is over. Just an FYI call the bank/finance co that you financed your truck and explain to them your situation-they maybe able to assist you. Good luck with the new job.
post #47 of 48
Congratulations on your new job, and, if you want to become a nurse, go for it! I can think of few professions that are as rewarding. I absolutely agree with what Heidi said about true friends, and think that you can, and should, re-establish those friendships now that this deadbeat is out of your life. Please keep him out of it, Cindy, for your own sake.
post #48 of 48
Cindy, girl I'm SO proud of you! CONGRATS!!! on getting the transfer and for starting "fresh". Lots of hugs to you!
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