Kitten Aggression - 13 Weeks

Hello there! I'm new to the site! I'm Reli! =] I'm a Veterinary Assistant at a large 5 doctor practice in Southern California! And I am a "mom" to a 13 week old grey tabby named Gage! Unfortunately, I have been dealing with some play aggression that I was hoping people could give me some advice on or words of comfort that he is just a naughty boy who will grow out of it! My co-workers and Vet's all are convinced he will, but I'm a worrisome person. 

Here is Gage's story:


(He's the top one!)

When he and is 3 litter mates were 3 weeks old they were found in a bush by a client of my work near his apartment. They were dirty, the 5th litter mate had passed away, and the mama was no where in site. My co-worker took them in, bottle fed them, and socialized them. When they were about 5 weeks old I took a turn babysitting them for a night. My boyfriend and I fell in love with Gage! A few days later we brought him home. He was sweet and cuddly! He ate fantastically and litter box trained immediately!


(5 and 1/2 weeks)

Although he was quite the cuddle-bug to begin with, I could tell from the beginning he was going to be the mischievous type. He would spit at you randomly when he became restless after cuddling and would nip. I started "no bite" training right away: replacing hands with toys, ignoring him or removing him from the room if he got rough while being held, and occasionally gently scruffing with a firm "no". Out of desperation I tried the water bottle - because instead of helping, all of these techniques rolled off of him like water! It wasn't until 8 weeks that the situation escalated. He hardly ever wanted to be cuddled anymore until he was exhausted. He started attacking legs and feet whether they were moving or not. If you tried to gently scruff him 8/10 times he would scream and try to kick you with his back legs - I was not rough at ALL. It was COMPLETELY a temper tantrum!

I bought him tons of toys, a crinkle tunnel, a scratching post. But the only thing that would sort of make him calm down was constant feather-wand play! And even after 40 minutes of non-stop play he would STILL go for feet or nip at you when you would pick him up.

Everything I read at the time said "get another kitten". Sadly, another kitten is not an option. It took 3 years to finally have my boyfriend agree to THIS kitten. And THIS kitten was driving him nuts!


(8 weeks)

Some of his behavior has calmed. When playing with a toy he will no longer be constantly distracted by the hand HOLDING the toy. But if you get your hand anywhere near him when he is in a non-cuddle mood (so 90% of the time) he will nip at you. If you pick him up at ALL when he doesn't want to (90% of the time) he will have his ears back, tail whipping and REALLY bite you. Hissing at him will get him to let go of your leg: but he still clings to moving legs. 

He really can be a sweet boy. When he DOES cuddle he nuzzles your nose, purrs, licks your face and will sometimes nap with you. But it is always short lived and occasionally he will be unpredictable and swipe at your face out of nowhere. 

I will say I DO work a lot. He does have to spend a good chunk of time alone. So I'm sure a part of this could be him acting out. I am hoping my hours are going to be reduced within the next couple weeks.

But, does anyone have an comments or advice? Will he grow out of this?

Did anyone else have hellion kittens that grew up to be nice and well behaved adults? =]


(Gage today at 13 weeks!)

No advice? I'm a sad panda. lol

Hi, and welcome to TCS

Sorry for the delayed response - I think quite a few of us have got caught up in the babble thread (I know I have).

I think he's just very prone to getting over stimulated. Remember he is young, and kittens really are bundles of energy at this age. Play aggression is incredibly common too.

For now, I'd let him initiate all cuddles, and pay close attention to his body language. At the first hint of a tail twitch, stop. As he grows up and settles down he'll become more cuddlesome - though remember that some cats are less cuddly than others. He may never be a cuddlebug.

With play, invest in a toy like Da Bird. It has such a long wand and line that he should stop connecting your body with play. Make sure he's got some really good kicker toys that he can lay into too.

The most effective way to play is to mimic a hunt with the toy, letting it slowly 'die' and eventually be 'killed' by Gage. Follow this with a meaty treat so he gets to eat his 'prey'. This should leave him much more satisfied and ready to groom and sleep.

These articles may help :-

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/playtime-aggression

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/cat-play-the-rules-of-the-game

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/playing-with-your-cat-ten-things-every-cat-owner-needs-to-know

It might also be worth looking into some big toys he can entertain himself with - such as the Catit Design range (though there are tons of others).

Lastly, make sure you have an exchange toy to hand when using Da Bird - some cats don't like to give their prey up, so you have to toss them a substitute to stop them destroying the feather lure.

Happy playing

Columbine said:

Hi, and welcome to TCS

Sorry for the delayed response - I think quite a few of us have got caught up in the babble thread (I know I have).

I think he's just very prone to getting over stimulated. Remember he is young, and kittens really are bundles of energy at this age. Play aggression is incredibly common too.

For now, I'd let him initiate all cuddles, and pay close attention to his body language. At the first hint of a tail twitch, stop. As he grows up and settles down he'll become more cuddlesome - though remember that some cats are less cuddly than others. He may never be a cuddlebug.

With play, invest in a toy like Da Bird. It has such a long wand and line that he should stop connecting your body with play. Make sure he's got some really good kicker toys that he can lay into too.

The most effective way to play is to mimic a hunt with the toy, letting it slowly 'die' and eventually be 'killed' by Gage. Follow this with a meaty treat so he gets to eat his 'prey'. This should leave him much more satisfied and ready to groom and sleep.

These articles may help :-

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/playtime-aggression

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/cat-play-the-rules-of-the-game

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/playing-with-your-cat-ten-things-every-cat-owner-needs-to-know

It might also be worth looking into some big toys he can entertain himself with - such as the Catit Design range (though there are tons of others).

Lastly, make sure you have an exchange toy to hand when using Da Bird - some cats don't like to give their prey up, so you have to toss them a substitute to stop them destroying the feather lure.

Happy playing

Click to expand...

Ahh! Thank you for the response! I'm glad to hear some encouraging words! And thank you for the advice and the links! I shall look into them and try to practice them! The hard part is getting my boyfriend to go along with it. He would never hurt the kitten, but his patience is short and he often just become frustrated and gives up.

It's sadly ironic that in the beginning the kitten liked him the most, and now he is constantly picking on my boyfriend. He doesn't play nearly as rough with me as he does with him.

Early today my boyfriend was nicely playing feather-wand with him. Suddenly he ignored the wand and attacked my bf's arm causing him to bleed. My boyfriend sadly just put down the toy and walked away saying "this cat sucks". =[

Your BF has to learn a little patience - much easier said than done, I know. You might find these articles (as well as the others) help him to have a little more insight into cats in general
http://www.thecatsite.com/a/cat-behavior-for-beginners

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/the-dos-and-donts-of-cat-behavior-modification

I suspect Gage's rougher behaviour with your BF is simply indicative of the kind of energy your BF brings to him. As Gage is better with you, see if you can get your BF to mimic what you do. He might be surprised at the difference it makes.

I think getting a wand and line toy is going to make a huge difference. You need to get your hands much further away from the target to break the association. It can be done. Hang in there

*UPDATE!*

So, this last Friday was the worst it's ever been. COMPLETE acting out. Attacking feet non-stop, destructive (he CHEWED THROUGH MY PHONE CHARGER CABLE), biting, throwing tantrums. I tried playing with him for long periods of time - NOTHING helped, he was unmanageable!  I went to work Saturday in tears. I took him to work with me to remove him from the apartment so my boyfriend could have a day off - and since I work at a Vet clinic Gage does fine there.

I talked with one of the doctors about my frustrations and how I was really starting to worry that I just don't have the lifestyle for this kitten and maybe we should consider re-homing him and trying out an adult cat in the future. I mean, sometimes you just have to admit to yourself when a different situation will be better for the animal.

However, Dr. Nicci (she's awesome!) talked me into giving him more time. Everyone at work had to have me repeat the mantra "He's a kitten. He CAN be trained!" lol

So, we trialed some Feliway spray in his kennel while he was at work with me. Overall he was a lot calmer than usual. He would still nibble when people held him too long, but he wasn't as feisty as usual. I took home some of the Feliway and sprayed it around my boyfriend's desk, around his scratching post and some areas on the couch he likes to climb on. It really seemed to help! I mean, it's not a miracle cure - the cat is still a little bit of a feisty guy, but he CUDDLED with my boyfriend! Got on his chest, nuzzled his chin and face! They sat together for almost an hour! I could here celebration bells! lol

Also I spent a good amount of time playing with him. I would keep tossing around mice and he would have fun batting them around. We used treats as positive reinforcement when he would let us pet him. (He has discovered that treats are AWESOME. lol)

Now, obviously he still has some kinks to work out. Meaning ankle biting and when play gets too aggressive. All other forms of training we used in the past weren't working: putting him in the bathroom, replacing hands with toys, water bottle, etc.

The ONLY thing that he dislikes and understands is being placed in his carrier. So, we use his carrier for time out. 5-10 minutes if he gets too aggressive at all. He meows, he doesn't like it. But I think he is slowly getting the connection that when he is bad he gets to go in his boring carrier. He rubs up against my legs when I let him out! (which in my head I have made up as an apology lol) It has helped his behavior improve tremendously in just the last 2 days!

I know it's still going to take time. But we are working on patience and consistency with the balance of play, treats for good behavior, time out for bad behavior. I've got my boyfriend on the band wagon!

Side note: I bought my boyfriend a laser pointer! Kitty loves it and Zach loves it because there are no hands involved! Yay!

So glad that things are going better. Remember it's a process - just like kids, kittens can get boisterous and rebellious too...but give him time and patience and you'll end up with a well behaved adult with a wonderful bond with you

Well,

2nd update! (If anyone cares, haha)

I'm getting more worried about actual aggression vs play aggression. The last week he has definitely been better OVER ALL. You can actually pet him now and then instead of just him trying to go for your hand every time you reach down. If I'm home all day with him I switch intervals of having him around the whole apartment with me and going in the bedroom for a couple hours for some quiet time with his toys. If I don't do this he never naps and becomes grumpy, lol. 

But, I feel like somehow we have taken 2 steps back.

Although the carrier time-out system was working initially, now it doesn't seem to phase him as much. ESPECIALLY in the evening. After 9pm it's like he turns into a completely different cat.

(I call this "Going Super Saiyan")


It's a Dragon Ball Z reference... if no one gets it. Hahaha.

He becomes aggressively playful and jumps on desks, attacks anything, BITES. It's horrible! And it's both literal, and figuratively, Night & Day. One of my Vets thinks this particular kitten trait he will grow out of. He gets the nocturnal itch or whatever. But, do you have any experience with kittens being this way at night? This feels like a dumb question. I'm such a worrisome mom. Just wait until I have HUMAN babies. lol

Last night he escaped from the bathroom (where he sleeps) when I had to pee. He was completely out of sleep and right back into "Super Saiyan" mode. I went to pick him up and he bit me HARD. It drew blood. I feel bad because I gave him a little slap on the butt (it wasn't hard, but I still didn't want to do it). It was 3am, I was exhausted. Excuses, I know. But it made me well up with tears. Why does he do this? WHY!?

He hasn't attacked legs that much all week and then suddenly yesterday and today -  first thing in the morning and at night he will grab onto your leg and bite your pants REALLY hard. Like thank GOD we are usually wearing jeans! lol

I just want to love him and feed him and take care of him! And he has mood swings like a teenager! lol

Any words of comfort? lol

I'm really sorry to hear your kitty is still giving you a hard time. I really hate to suggest this, especially as he is so young, but have you ever considered anti-anxiety medicine?

I have asked the Veterinarians at my work about anxiety medication or even herbal calming supplements and they basically laughed at me because he is only a kitten. He just turned 14 weeks on Tuesday. 

He responds pretty well to Feliway, but it has been on back order when my work tries to order it and I am only allowed to take so many of the "free sample" wipes that we offer in our office. I DID order a Feliway diffuser off of Amazon yesterday. Luckily my apartment is small so the sq footage it covers should reach everywhere. But, it won't show up for 5 business days. >.<

I don't know if I'm doing something wrong? He is only a kitten, and I know "Rome wasn't built in a day" and the whole training thing takes time - but I feel like it should be sticking a little faster that we FEED and LOVE him and there is no need to attempt to communicate with us via his teeth or act out violently.

I feel like we should have gotten 2 kittens when we got him, but it's just not realistic for the size of our apartment. =[

I once had a similar problem but unfortunately before I could really address it, my kitten was let out by accident and hit by a car.  Anything I know is based on reading the threads here, but based on what I read in the threads here, it sounds like you are doing everything right.  I have seen other calming agents recommended however.  One is Composure which is available in chew form on amazon.    I seem to remember it is also available as drops but did not find this at amazon.

Another is a calming collar - I don't know what kind other people have used but see this one on amazon: 
Good luck with this.  I remember how difficult it was with our kitten Whisper.  I was afraid to see him coming but almost more afraid NOT to see him because he tended to hide and pounce on me!  I hope you find something that works soon!

When are you planning to have him neutered.  I think cats calm down a little afterwards.

I'm sorry you're still having problems with Gage. I think you're dealing with typical kitten hyperactivity! I really don't think calmers are warranted at this stage. I'd suggest that you stop with the time-outs - that kind of discipline  is usually only used in very extreme situations, and I honestly don't think you're there yet. Time-outs in a carrier also put you at an increased risk of injury when getting him in there, not to mention building up negative associations with the carrier....something you may live to regret when trying to catch him for the vet later on.

I still think he's acting out of play rather than malice/negativity. I'm not surprised you've been bitten when you've gone to pick him up when he's highly stimulated/energised. Basically, he's forgetting that you're neither another kitten or a toy! 

Playtime just before bed...and I mean really playing with him - getting him going until he literally drops and is too tired to keep going...is going to be the key to peaceful nights. Its also important to always approach him with confidence. Keep in mind that if you act like prey (i.e. make tentative, jerky movements) you can be expect to be treated like prey.

You could look into using Spirit Essences to help balance him a little. They're totally natural, but can have surprisingly good results. I really wouldn't recommend going for anything stronger for what is still relatively young kitten.

Night time craziness is pretty common. It really isn't anything to worry about. The only way to change the behaviour is to wear him out. There really aren't an shortcuts.
[article="22303"]Cats And Night Crazies  [/article][article="32493"]The Dos And Donts Of Cat Behavior Modification  [/article][article="29678"]Cats And Discipline Dont Mix  [/article]

Hi there, 

We adopted an orange tabby a few weeks ago that has also been a little crazy..right now he's about 13-14 weeks.  We got him after our sweet old-man kitty passed away.  Our old man kitty adopted us after being abandoned and his personality was so chilled-out and loving, I've been a little unprepared for our new baby boy's wild behavior!!!  lol!  He sure has kept me busy...we have been experiencing some of what you are descibing, when we are in bed asleep, he will all of a sudden jump up and start attacking/biting our feet.  He definately has his crazy times, day and night,  and at that point i never try to pick him up or pet him, I just let him be a savage beast for awhile!!

Then he will tire himself out and will act more civilized...haha.  Lately he has been coming up to me and wanting to cuddle (sort of).  But at this point I'm letting him initiate.  We so miss our old man kitty and his loving, comforting nature...I do think this type of behavior is a kitten thing tho...they just have too much energy, and they are still learning about the world and their environment.  

I say give your kitten more time...good luck.

Thanks for the replies and the links everyone!

I decided to test out "Operation Late Night Kitty Boot Camp"..... Yeah, that's kind of a long name. Basically, I am trying to play with him pretty vigorously and then give him some treats and wet food before bed time (as was suggested!).

So far I am exhausted! Haha, we are BOTH getting exercise!

I've been dragging his favorite toy around for about 45 all together. I take 5 minute break in between when he starts to get really tired. After every little session I gave him 1-2 little turkey flavored kitty treats. He lovessss them! He used to try to climb my leg to get to the bag! lol

Anyways, he lays around lazily - but after about 5 to 10 minutes he's already trying to get into mischief. BUT, he will let me pet him after I administer the treats without giving me teeth or sass! Yaaaay! 


Here he is tired! He's being dramatic. He was grooming himself right before I took this picture, lol.

I also introduced him to boxes! Because kitties love boxes! Haha


I just put him in his bathroom for the night. He laid at his food bowl and ate some extra crunchies, purring while I pet him. Hopefully I tuckered him out and gave him enough calories to sleep peacefully tonight and not be so crazy in the morning! During his play session he got at least 6 little treats and 1/6th of a can of turkey and potato kitten food. It should satisfy the beast within! lol

I'll update you guys in a day or so if this trick seems to help over the weekend!

Thank you again for the links and words of encouragement! It was all helpful! <3

Here's a picture of our cuddle session earlier today - just because he looks adorable!

Handsome Kitty said:

 
When are you planning to have him neutered.  I think cats calm down a little afterwards.

Click to expand...

We plan to have him neutered in about a month/month and a half when he is closer to 5 months of age. A couple weeks after his last round of shots! 

The Vets say that he's still so young his behavior is juvenile - not driven by testosterone. But, there is still hope in the direction of him calming down once the deed is done since many kitties slow down a bit, testosterone driven or not, after neutering!

Here's to hoping! <3 Hehe

So great that you're making progress  Sometimes it the little milestones that mean the most. Getting him neutered will make a huge difference to his behaviour...even though the behaviour isn't testosterone driven, neutering does really help chill cats out. Stay positive, and keep going. You'll get there in the end - and it'll be all the sweeter when you do because of all your hard work 

The wind toys on sticks are great but the best toy for my 13 month old kitten is the 'Cat Meow' Daisy plays daily with it and never gets fed up. My kitten wasn't socialized by the breeder so she has had to learn again. I couldn't stroke her till two weeks ago and won't let me pick her up or go on my knee but as l sit at my window sill a lot she sits by me. She tried to nibble twice but l just said no and we have been OK. I have found out not to rush things l just let her came to me and she learns things at her own speed ,this week she let me brush her for the first time.

About the cat meow they do take three batteries but if you get good ones they  last over a month,

Jilly

Well, last night was a success. I wore him out, I pumped him with tasty food and when I put him to bed around 11pm in his bathroom he lazily ate some more crunchies and then went to bed without a peep!

This morning he was still a little hyper, but no where near as much as he normally is when I get ready for work. He only half-heartedly tried to attack my ankles once, but for the most part batted around his toys.

I took him to work with me today, as I usually do every Saturday. He did fine, he napped for the most part. When I went to check on him 3 or 4 times he accepted pets happily and played with me for a bit before returning to naps.

When we get home I usually put him in the bedroom for 30-45min alone to let him unwind from the car ride. 

It's been REALLY hot here today. My work has air conditioning, but my apartment does not. So he slept under the cool bed for most of the afternoon and evening. I napped in the bedroom myself and he cuddled with me for about a half an hour before retreating back under the bed. We both fell asleep until like 8:30pm. Then, he went super saiyan! lol

I was prepared to play with him like last night, but he wasn't as excited tonight. He over heated quickly and I could only play with him for maybe 20 minutes total. He would stop and pant, so I would stop and give him a break. His heart wasn't in it. And I think he became frustrated by this because he WANTED to play, but it's sooo miserably hot.

He jumped on my boyfriend's desk - which we are trying to discourage. He seemed calm enough, after our mini play session and the treats and wet food I gave him. So I tried to pick him to remove him from the desk where my boyfriend and I both tried to give him a little attention. He suddenly flipped out and tried to bite us both at random while in my hands. No tail warning, no ears back, nothing.

I blew a puff of air in his face and told him "no", which made him more mad and he tried to bite me again so I had to gently scruff him and give him a firmer "no", where he started throwing a tantrum and trying to do the ugly cat scream. This is where he also tries to kick at my hand with his back legs and scratch the crap out of me. I held him against my body, trying to tell him no and talk softly, and took him to the bedroom where I wanted us to "hug it out" if you will. I talked soothing to him more, but he wasn't having it. Ears were now back, tail was twitching... he was pissed. So last resort I stuck him in the carrier for 5 minutes where he just chilled. He seemed warm and uncomfortable. 

When I let him out he laid next to me, purring, on the floor by the carrier. But suddenly tried to nip at me and ran away after a couple minutes. My response was a lame "Hey!" at him as he retreated, lol.

You think this particular instance tonight he was just acting out because he was over heated?

It seemed unprovoked and, like I said, we couldn't play for very long at a time to get his energy out.

After his bite and run I got his bathroom set up for the night and then played with him for 5-7 more minutes before giving him a treat and putting him in there for bed time.

Feels like a never ending pattern of 2 steps forward, 1 step back.  >.< Gah.

I suspect he 'flipped out' simply because he got over stimulated - both of you cuddling at once may just have been too much for him.

Apart from that, it all sounds like its going well. I'd advise you against trying to 'hug it out' when he flips/gets hyper. Instead, just walk away and let him decompress. Try hissing at him when he goes for you - that's what another cat would do, and cats automatically understand that a hiss means 'back off'.

Heat could certainly make him feel uncomfortable and act out. These articles have great ways to keep cats cool  [article="0"]Keeping Cats Cool​[/article]  ;  [article="30051"]Summertime Safety For Cat Owners​[/article].