First, let me say that I am nearing the age of 65 and I've had several cats in my life. Thus, I've lost several cats (for the time being. I truly believe we'll see each other again.) I would think that with age ("maturity") that it would get "easier". It doesn't; it gets harder - gut-wrenchingly difficult.
About O'Henry....He was a "foster", along with his sister. What a laugh that I would just "foster". His equally beautiful sister was adopted by a close friend of mine. I planned to let rescue volunteer friends of mine take her brother, O'Henry, to an adoption event. The morning of that day, I called them and said, "I've changed my mind. I'm keeping him." So a house of already 5 more senior kitties just became six. He fit in so well with my fur family. It was meant to be.
Over the years the other 5 left us, the last living to be 20 years old. So it was just O'Henry and I for about a year. Then last year I took in 4 kittens from the same litter. O'Henry LOVED them! He ran around this past year like a big kitty, playful, happy, healthy - the Big Daddy.
He has always been the picture of health. Then about 3 weeks ago - 3 weeks and my life changed. O'Henry suddenly just wasn't acting himself. He hid under beds and chairs and didn't have his appetite - vague changes. So I took him to the vet. The vet noticed then that he had somewhat labored breathing and took an xray - fluid around the lungs and a suspicious spot. He wasn't hopeful, I could tell. He did give him Lasix and an antibiotic and said bring him back the next day. Is that what I should have done? But I didn't. Queen of denial that I am ( I went through this with my husband in 2005.), I wanted another opinion - another outcome so I called a couple other vets. I told them about the labored breathing and both referred me to an emergency vet who took more xrays, and ultrasound, put him on oxygen, and removed the fluid from around his lungs. MAYBE it was something else, something treatable. Should I have put him through all of this, I ask myself, but friends tell me that had I not, I would have felt guilty that I hadn't tried. They sent the fluids to pathology......lung cancer.
So I brought him home and tried supplements, continued the Lasix, prayed. Until the past couple of days he tried to eat, drank water, used the litter box. He never threw up the food. There were moments when I thought I might have the miracle I prayed for, but this morning at 9 AM the fight was over for him. The other 4 fur babies and I lost a very, very special friend.
As I said, none of it gets "easier". As I always do, I drive myself crazy with my what ifs, my shouldas, wouldas, and couldas. I don't think I'll ever change. He was only 10. Except for one kitty, Stormy, who passed at 9 years, all my babies have lived to 15, 17,18, 20....Why? Why when he seemed so very healthy? I never thought that O'Henry would have any serious health issues.
Now, even though I have 4 other kids here, I still feel a tremendous void, an emptiness. I know he knows that he was loved - my beautiful boy, O'Henry. We'll miss you.....
About O'Henry....He was a "foster", along with his sister. What a laugh that I would just "foster". His equally beautiful sister was adopted by a close friend of mine. I planned to let rescue volunteer friends of mine take her brother, O'Henry, to an adoption event. The morning of that day, I called them and said, "I've changed my mind. I'm keeping him." So a house of already 5 more senior kitties just became six. He fit in so well with my fur family. It was meant to be.
Over the years the other 5 left us, the last living to be 20 years old. So it was just O'Henry and I for about a year. Then last year I took in 4 kittens from the same litter. O'Henry LOVED them! He ran around this past year like a big kitty, playful, happy, healthy - the Big Daddy.
He has always been the picture of health. Then about 3 weeks ago - 3 weeks and my life changed. O'Henry suddenly just wasn't acting himself. He hid under beds and chairs and didn't have his appetite - vague changes. So I took him to the vet. The vet noticed then that he had somewhat labored breathing and took an xray - fluid around the lungs and a suspicious spot. He wasn't hopeful, I could tell. He did give him Lasix and an antibiotic and said bring him back the next day. Is that what I should have done? But I didn't. Queen of denial that I am ( I went through this with my husband in 2005.), I wanted another opinion - another outcome so I called a couple other vets. I told them about the labored breathing and both referred me to an emergency vet who took more xrays, and ultrasound, put him on oxygen, and removed the fluid from around his lungs. MAYBE it was something else, something treatable. Should I have put him through all of this, I ask myself, but friends tell me that had I not, I would have felt guilty that I hadn't tried. They sent the fluids to pathology......lung cancer.
So I brought him home and tried supplements, continued the Lasix, prayed. Until the past couple of days he tried to eat, drank water, used the litter box. He never threw up the food. There were moments when I thought I might have the miracle I prayed for, but this morning at 9 AM the fight was over for him. The other 4 fur babies and I lost a very, very special friend.
As I said, none of it gets "easier". As I always do, I drive myself crazy with my what ifs, my shouldas, wouldas, and couldas. I don't think I'll ever change. He was only 10. Except for one kitty, Stormy, who passed at 9 years, all my babies have lived to 15, 17,18, 20....Why? Why when he seemed so very healthy? I never thought that O'Henry would have any serious health issues.
Now, even though I have 4 other kids here, I still feel a tremendous void, an emptiness. I know he knows that he was loved - my beautiful boy, O'Henry. We'll miss you.....