My cat was diagnosed with lymphoma in September and it has really hit me hard. I am depressed and easily upset and angry these days. I am pretty much the caregiver for her. My husband holds her so I can give her pills and gives her love but he is not really involved with her care. He isn’t making calls to the vet almost weekly to ask questions, going to appointments or researching medications etc. I think he knows what medicine she is on but would be totally clueless if he had to give it to her.
Having said all that, the other night we were talking about things and he told me that I am concentrating on the loss that hasn’t even happened yet. I should just enjoy the time I have with her. I am enjoying my time with her but it is hard to not be sad, possibly starting the grieving process because I am in the middle of everything and he isn’t. I have to monitor input/output, address issues, think of how far we will go to keep her going and keep up with her medications. In between all of that I am working a full time job, a part time second job I do at home and trying to keep my own sanity.
I have taken a ton of pictures of her, play with her, give her all the love she wants and she never gets into trouble when she knocks things off tables or gets into cabinets anymore. I have even let her go outside and walk around in the backyard a little (she is/was 100% indoor cat). I am trying to make happy, loving memories with her and not just put my head in the sand like everything is normal.
I started therapy a few months ago and started anti-depressants as well because I am still dealing with the loss of my father, who died of Leukemia 2 years ago (I was his only caregiver throughout his illness too and he passed away in my home). I think this makes it extra hard for me. My husband is what I call a “typical guy” and just wants things fixed. I know he is just as sad as me but he doesn’t show it the same way. He does everything I tell him to do but I have to tell him and that can be frustrating. I think my feelings are normal and valid and he thinks I am being negative all the time.
The lack of support from my family and friends isn’t helping things so I thought I would reach out to see if anyone else has had the same struggles, advice or would love to give me a shoulder to cry on. I find this site a godsend for information and advice and it has helped me so much in taking care of her but emotionally it's been a real struggle.
Having said all that, the other night we were talking about things and he told me that I am concentrating on the loss that hasn’t even happened yet. I should just enjoy the time I have with her. I am enjoying my time with her but it is hard to not be sad, possibly starting the grieving process because I am in the middle of everything and he isn’t. I have to monitor input/output, address issues, think of how far we will go to keep her going and keep up with her medications. In between all of that I am working a full time job, a part time second job I do at home and trying to keep my own sanity.
I have taken a ton of pictures of her, play with her, give her all the love she wants and she never gets into trouble when she knocks things off tables or gets into cabinets anymore. I have even let her go outside and walk around in the backyard a little (she is/was 100% indoor cat). I am trying to make happy, loving memories with her and not just put my head in the sand like everything is normal.
I started therapy a few months ago and started anti-depressants as well because I am still dealing with the loss of my father, who died of Leukemia 2 years ago (I was his only caregiver throughout his illness too and he passed away in my home). I think this makes it extra hard for me. My husband is what I call a “typical guy” and just wants things fixed. I know he is just as sad as me but he doesn’t show it the same way. He does everything I tell him to do but I have to tell him and that can be frustrating. I think my feelings are normal and valid and he thinks I am being negative all the time.
The lack of support from my family and friends isn’t helping things so I thought I would reach out to see if anyone else has had the same struggles, advice or would love to give me a shoulder to cry on. I find this site a godsend for information and advice and it has helped me so much in taking care of her but emotionally it's been a real struggle.
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