You can tell a lot about a person by their....

[satai]

Originally Posted by theimp98

lol really folks, you cant really judge anyone by there looks.
the outside is just that. It does not really tell you what is really in there.

lol Even my wife said that if had not gotten to know me on the internet first,
she would never have talked to me, AS that i did not look like her type.
as she said, i look scary.

I think I know what you mean. Depending on the day you meet me, and the mood I'm in, and how comfortable I'm in my skin, you can get a very different impression of me.

For example, I swear, an awful, awful lot, but most people don't notice, because I don't "look" like the kind of person who does, even I do it quite often in front of them. I've also had people tell me that I shouldn't care so much much about being a girly-girl because I'm not, and that's okay. Of course it's okay! I can wear purple satin and know how to sharpen a knife - it's not a zero sum game! I'm a genius, so people get confused when they realise that I can't always tell the letter 'f' from the letter 'v' - it's obvious that I'm smart, but it's not obvious that I'm dyslexic.

I had an Italian (as in, from Italy) lecturer in my sophmore year in college. My classmates complained constantly about not being able to understand her. I have a fraction of normal hearing, and I had no problem understanding her. On the other hand, political economy is made of boring. Which do you think was the real problem?

 

[zissou'smom]

A whole lot of you would judge me based on what I look like... my clothes are always wrinkled, I don't even own an iron. I wear men's undershirts (the pocket kind-- but at least they are the colored kind, not white) to work. I wash my hair maybe one or two times a week because it is very dry. I get called a 'dirty hippy' on a regular basis. My nails are clean but a strange mishmash of lengths. PS, no I don't smell, I shower daily if not more and wear deodorant and I shave the appropriate areas...

But to let you all know, I care about everything in my life. I just don't have time or money to care about crap that doesn't matter. Then again, I'm not trying to enter into the professional office world either-- it's not for me, I'm not for it.

I am a snap-decision judgement maker. I can't describe what I base that judgement on though... it's usually right, but I never can describe what it is.

 

[satai]

Originally Posted by Zissou'sMom

I am a snap-decision judgement maker. I can't describe what I base that judgement on though... it's usually right, but I never can describe what it is.

Humans are pattern matches. Most animals are.

Clearly, your brain is good at it

For your purposes, at least, and that's really all any of us can hope for.

 

[lemur 6]

Originally Posted by menasmom

I think you can tell alot about a person by the car they drive.
I drive a Ford Focus Hatchback, and to me it says I'm practical, no frills, and don't give a sh*t what people think. (And I don't spend as much on gas as those who drive the environmentally UNfriendly SUVs).

Mmm... while I do somewhat agree, I think the way people drive shows more about them than what type of car they drive. Plus if you're like me, outwardly it'll appear that I drive an old clunker car, but if you take a peek under the hood you'll see something that shouldn't even be possible

and SUV's?! SUV's are so out of style, CUV's are the hot thing now.

 

[mooficat]

Originally Posted by Bonnie1965

I've learned that when I make snap judgements about people, it really says more about me than it does about them

that is so true, what do the shrink people call it.....transferrance or something

well lets see

tattoos..........nah ! cos I've got one and loads of people are very surprised and usually say they didnt think I was the sort of person to have one

how much flesh someone shows

no comment

the books they read, awh well the list goes on and on !!

 

[gingersmom]

Originally Posted by mooficat

that is so true, what do the shrink people call it.....transferrance or something

It's called Projection: the things people can't stand the most about other people are generally the qualities or characteristics they they themselves possess but are in denial about.

I learned that in Psych 101.

 

[lunasmom]

Originally Posted by Satai

Humans are pattern matches. Most animals are.

Clearly, your brain is good at it

For your purposes, at least, and that's really all any of us can hope for.

Wouldn't it also be considered stereotyping? Actually perhaps pattern matching is a better term. I.e. if I had a friend that dressed bohemian and was a vegatarian, who only showered once a week, etc I would immediately associate anyone else dress bohemian based on what I know.

 

[abigail]

you can tell alot about a person by how they treat people who don't have influence over them.

some people are rude to waitstaff, doormen, cab drivers, orderlies, receptionist , bus drivers etc and I think if they cant be polite or civil to strangers they, in the long run, wont remain civil to those they are close to. JMO

 

[bonnie1965]

Originally Posted by Abigail

you can tell alot about a person by how they treat people who don't have influence over them.

some people are rude to waitstaff, doormen, cab drivers, orderlies, receptionist , bus drivers etc and I think if they cant be polite or civil to strangers they, in the long run, wont remain civil to those they are close to. JMO

Dave Barry quote:
"A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person."

 

[menasmom]

Originally Posted by Lemur 6

Mmm... while I do somewhat agree, I think the way people drive shows more about them than what type of car they drive. Plus if you're like me, outwardly it'll appear that I drive an old clunker car, but if you take a peek under the hood you'll see something that shouldn't even be possible

and SUV's?! SUV's are so out of style, CUV's are the hot thing now.

Okay, color me stupid. What in God's name is a CUV??? I can't even think of what the "C" might stand for.... HELP!!!

 

[lemur 6]

Originally Posted by menasmom

Okay, color me stupid. What in God's name is a CUV??? I can't even think of what the "C" might stand for.... HELP!!!

C is for Crossover. CUV = Crossover Utility Vehicle. They're the answer to gas hungry SUV's. They tend to be slightly smaller than SUV's, but have the gas mileage and handling characteristics of small cars and sedans with the space and people carrying capacity of a SUV.

Honda's new CR-V is a good example. So is the Acura MDX. Not too familiar with other companies, but I'm sure you can easily name a dozen examples.

 

[satai]

Originally Posted by lunasmom

Wouldn't it also be considered stereotyping? Actually perhaps pattern matching is a better term. I.e. if I had a friend that dressed bohemian and was a vegatarian, who only showered once a week, etc I would immediately associate anyone else dress bohemian based on what I know.

I probably shouldn't even be trying to do this; I'm working on my BD thesis, so I'm completely "why is the rum always gone?" drunk.

Stereotyping is part of the pattern matching phenomena, and is superstition - both are faults of the process, as I understand it. The correct explaination is almost certainly more nuanced, but the basics of the situation are this (apparently):

1. An animal eats a red berry
2. It makes them sick
3. They do not risk eating red berries in future.
4. They survive and pass this behaviour on to their young
5. Their young do not eat red berries either.

The downsides - and upsides - of this process are probably obvious, so I won't bore anyone with their details.