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I totally agree with what you said above! In answer to your last question, he does offer support to some of the others, but honestly his support is downright depressing. His posts reek of despair. The bottom line is, how can anyone help someone who wants to stay stuck? The answer is you can't. Better for us to spend our time helping those who want help. I'm not sure he is cannibalizing others' grief, but you may be right about that.
We had a rather blunt conversation with my SILs husband via phone one day about the issues with their two dogs. He told us he didn't know what to do with them. There are lots of people who don't want or shouldn't have any animal in their care. As much as we want to see every cat have a home talking someone into getting one when they truly are not interested can lead to abuse and neglect for the animal. If I knew the rescue they got them from I would give it a call. I'm pretty sure the objective is a good home. Not one running up and down roads in traffic. Being left out all night to howl and bark and certainly not having a neighbor get so fed up with the aggression they pepper spray them.
In the world of horses I have seen things I cannot unsee. Death is by far not the worst thing that can happen to an animal. I mourn the loss of my Nikkihorse over a decade later. I'm sure I will mourn my Kitten as long and forever. Life even grinds to a halt in the beginning. All of our human emotions can live side by side. One of the hardest things to deal with is that while we are paralyzed with grief the rest of the world keeps living. The hardest thing to do when you are paralyzed with grief is understand you will go on living.
He is stuck. And from your description would stay there new pet or not.
Look how many people on the crossing over thread come here for the first time. The need to seek comfort and the most understanding comfort is from those that have known this sadness. This is mutual support. I don't want to sound cruel. But is he offering support or cannibalizing on everyone else's grief.
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