What To Do With A Needy Howling Old Cat?!?!

[BusyBeeDD]

I am new to being a cat owner--I just married/moved in with my husband who has a 15 year old cat (Cuddles). From what I understand Cuddles has always been sweet but very needy and vocal. He grew up with my husband's family who gave him attention every time he meowed/howled and let him sleep in their bed

About 8 months ago my husband moved with his two cats and one of them passed away shortly after. Since then the needy behaviors Cuddles already had have been amplified and he "meows/howls" whenever we are home and all night long. He has been taken to two different vets who both gave him a clean bill of health.

We have been trying to reinforce good habits (being quite and not following us) by giving love, play time and treats and ignoring the bad habits (howling, standing underfoot) for the last month or so but have seen no improvement. If anything he has gotten more insistent (howling more frequently, jumping up on the table while we are eating, clawing under the bedroom door).

I understand he went through some traumatic events (moving, death of the other cat)--but that was all 7 months ago. How long can he keep this up, and what can we do to help him to stop? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!!

--he has a heated blanket, cat tree, many toys, and three guinea pig friends he enjoys watching. He currently eats chicken wet food, but we have tried introducing small amounts of other foods to no avail.

 

[susanm9006]

If it were my cat I would compromise recognizing he a senior kitty who lost and lonely without his companion and living through a bunch of other changes in his environment . Any change is hard on cats but especially difficult on an old cat.

I would hold firm on not allowing him on the table while you are eating, but open the bedroom to him. He may not really want to sleep with you, just be able to check to see that his people are there. This might help with the howling or it might not - howling randomly seems to come with a cats senior years and he may be calling to his former companion.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

I'm going to second that. Also, be aware that excessive vocalization in older cats is often a symptom of confusion. They forget we are there, forget just where they are, just as with humans. And, just as with humans, this causes anxiety. Try for patience. You'll need it yourself, one day.

 

[Columbine]

to everything already suggested. Given Cuddles' age, I strongly suspect that the behaviours you describe are symptoms of feline dementia. This isn't something a vet can test for, so its not inconsistent with the clean bill of health the vets gave him. I don't know if there are medications that can help ease the symptoms, but it would definitely be worth at least a phone consult with your preferred vet.

Also, what exactly was tested for when Cuddles was checked out? Hyperthyroidism can cause increased night time vocalizations, so its worth double checking that his thyroid function was tested. Another thing to consider is possible deterioration in sight and hearing - again, very common in aging cats. Cats who are going deaf can become VERY vocal and VERY loud, most likely because they can't hear themselves when meowing at their normal volume. Cats losing their sight can become extra clingy as they're disorintated and less confident in their surroundings, and this will be exacerbated by any major lifestyle changes - exactly the kinds of things Cuddles has been through recently.

I know it's frustrating to be told to go back to your vet, especially when you've seen two already, but if you didn't raise these specific issues there's definitely more to discuss.
Health Concerns In Aging Cats

 

[arouetta]

I understand he went through some traumatic events (moving, death of the other cat)--but that was all 7 months ago.

When you are old and you lose a brother or sister who lived with you, how will you feel when someone says "That was seven months ago, you should be completely over the grief process and be perfectly fine."? My guess is you'd think the person cruel.

And what's wrong with indulging an old cat's need for attention? What's wrong with letting the cat in the bedroom? Have you even considered separation anxiety?

When you married your husband, you married his cat too. And you did so with eyes wide open, unless he hid the cat until you were back from the honeymoon. Be a cat owner, don't be a person who simply tolerates a pet brought into the relationship.

 

[kittens mom]

You love him. That sounds simple but it's not. Be very careful where you tread with a cat that has been a companion for 15 years. You knew and accepted the cats before marriage I take it they weren't hidden in an offsite location ? This is not about your husband choosing you over his cat it's about you accepting the bargain you made when you married him.
A clean bill of health doesn't mean there isn't some feline dementia.
Medicines for Senility in Cats
I have seen it suggested that leaving a light on at night helps cats with some of these issues reorient themselves at night.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

And do bear in mind that most of us have dealt with feline dementia in our aging cats before, so we do understand the frustration, and that it is, in part, brought on by a feeling of helplessness!

 

[kittens mom]

And do bear in mind that most of us have dealt with feline dementia in our aging cats before, so we do understand the frustration, and that it is, in part, brought on by a feeling of helplessness!

Shelters are full of old cats with medical and behavior issues most are euthanized quickly or they become ill from the stress and die or are euthanized. Anyone who can't develop the empathy to care and love for an old pet either yours or through marriage should never have another pet. They all get old. We hope they get old. Very old.

 

[kissthisangel]

Columbine has shared some great advice here, particularly about an older and possibly ailing cat. Even if he's been given a clean bill of health from a vet sometimes blindness / deafness aren't brought up on normal tests. You can try some assessment at home with noisy toys like bells/ treats/ box of kibble in another room or laser pens, always use positive noises, particularly with an anxious older cat. If you find your cat is unresponsive, then another trip to the vet to confirm your suspicions will benefit you as the vet can assess the degree of this and offer advice about managing these conditions.

Maintaining a routine can be helpful, when you are ready to sit down to eat, you can place a meal down for your cat. This should stop him from trying to get up on the table, since he'll be occupied with his own dinner. He's had a lot of changes fairly recently, so try and establish feeding and gentle play routines to help him settle. Giving him lots of space to call his own, like cat trees, posts and beds in each area of the house can help to make him more secure.

I can understand why you, not having had a cat before , may not want the cat in bed with you. Would you be willing to offer the cat a space in the bedroom to be in there with you, but not on the bed? offer a variety of different spaces, a cat tree maybe, floor beds, a blanket on top of a wardrobe. It all depends on what the cat likes. You might even go for covering a warm water bottle in a thick blanket and putting it under a cushion to get him to settle.


I think you kind of have to think of him as an old man, who has had a rough time and can't vocalise what he really wants. If you start giving him these kinds of attention as a standard, you might get him to quiet down a little.

It's never too late to "teach and old dog new tricks" as it were. You can try some quick excercises a couple of times a day, by offering treats to him and praise and attention. hold a small treat above his head move your hand away from you, facing him ( it should be above his neck). He should naturally sit to look at it. Give him the treat, tell him well done / good boy, pet him. Show him you're interested in him. After a few minutes of repeating this you can say "all gone good boy" and walk away. The more you routinely give him attention without him asking the less he is likely to beg for it. You can use this to show him where to be as well, lead him with the treats as well.
For example, say he gets on the table, gently put him back on the floor and place a treat wherever you want him to be and a treat in between. When he goes for the treat, praise him. If he gets back on the table, gently place him down and point him to the treat.

I immediately felt the need to edit this to say: Cats aren't dogs they will not respond to a command without this treat motivation so always use the motivation of food /play. They will however learn actions will reap that particular reward so constancy is key.

 

[Yoshii_Mochii]

I have three cats. And out of the three, there's always one cat that "howls" every month. I don't know what I said I is up with max. He just starts howling. It's annoys everybody. And when I go to see what's wrong, he either stops or just does a soft meow. We have no female cats in our house so maybe he just wants love? He has one eye and that never bothers him. He is the runt of the litter and not at all overweight.