Almost three years ago, one of the other volunteers at my shelter finally managed to trap a very skinny, feral Holstein cat she'd been feeding for a couple of weeks. She took the cat to the shelter and put her in a cage in the observation room. The next morning, the staff found her nursing five perfectly beautiful boy kittens! One of them is now my darlin' Clyde, the furry little light of my life. :-)
All Clyde's brothers found good homes, too... but their mother, Abby, was not so lucky. Abby was utterly terrified of everybody and everything. If you opened her cage, she growled; if you reached in, she hissed and slashed viciously at your hands. The staff tried leaving her cage open so she could come out and socialize with the other cats, but she would only cower behind her litterbox and lash out with her claws. She left her mark on a lot of us -- both cats and people!
My mother and I visited her regularly, but made no headway. At this rate, Abby was never going to become adoptable, so I decided to take action. One day, I managed to reach in and get my arms around her with only minor injuries to my face. I brought her out of the cage, and to my amazement, she suddenly went completely submissive! She curled herself tightly into my shoulder and buried her face against my neck.
So I held her that way for awhile, rocking gently and murmurring to her, trying to let her know there was nothing to be afraid of. Eventually, she made a tentative little move to indicate that she wanted down, so I lowered her to the floor. A couple of the other cats immediately came over to say hello to her, and suddenly she was hissing and lashing out again. I picked her up and tried to calm her, but she would have none of it, so I returned her to her cage.
Similar visits occurred regularly for the next six months. Abby never got truly comfortable with me (or anyone else), never accepted the other cats, never showed any sign of improvement. But then, miraculously, someone adopted her! I was thrilled... but it turned out to be a disaster. Abby hid under a bed for nine days, coming out only when the woman SHOVED her out with a vacuum-cleaner attachment! I asked the woman to let the shelter have her back, and my wonderful mom decided to adopt her. We just couldn't bear to see her go back into a cage.
My mom worked so hard at winning Abby's trust. When Abby hid under a bed at my folks' house, my 78-year-old mom crawled right under there with her to deliver warm milk-substitute and have a quiet chat. When it became clear that Abby was not able to accept the other two cats in the house, my mother set her up in a room all her own. Over the past couple of years, my mother's efforts have brought Abby a long, long way.
But she still spends most of her time hiding in inaccessible places, and often hides even from my mom. She's terrified of leaving her room. Yet she also watches the other cats through a French door and imitates their behavior... bats eagerly at a certain toy my mom dangles for her... it's so clear that Abby longs for play and companionship. If only we could ease her fear, I know she WANTS to be a normal kitty!
And on top of all that, poor Abby has developed a blockage that causes the tears from her left eye to spill out onto her cheek, rather than draining down into her nose as they should. The constant moisture has caused a raw patch on her face that crusts over and has to be cleaned as often as Mom can get her to allow it. It must hurt terribly, and I feel the pain is probably contributing to her anxiety.
So here are my questions:
1. Early on, we tried spray Feliway, but it didn't seem to help. Should we try a Feliway Plug-in? Are they significantly more effective?
2. We also tried Rescue Remedy, to no avail. Are there other herbal concoctions we should try? Are they really, truly safe?
3. We have NOT tried drugs, but we are willing to if we can be certain they are safe and cannot do her lasting harm. Does anyone have experience with anti-anxiety medications for cats? Any recommendations?
4. For two years, we have gentled Abby along, hoping she would gradually relax, but progress seems to have ceased. We wonder if we should take a different approach, perhaps bringing Abby together with Dylan and Sassy and both my parents in a small room with no hiding places, and just sitting together for a few hours. Our idea is that such an "encounter group" (or perhaps a series of them) might force everybody to get past the novelty of togetherness and finally calm down! Are we completely crazy to even think of this?
5. We are saving up to let Abby have surgery that may or may not succeed in unblocking the passage into her nose and allowing her tears to drain correctly. Does anyone have experience with this kind of surgery? We'd love to have input.
If you've stuck with me through this long tale, thank you so much. My family and I will be deeply grateful for any recommendations you can give us. We love Abby so dearly, and we want so very much to see her relaxed and happy!
All Clyde's brothers found good homes, too... but their mother, Abby, was not so lucky. Abby was utterly terrified of everybody and everything. If you opened her cage, she growled; if you reached in, she hissed and slashed viciously at your hands. The staff tried leaving her cage open so she could come out and socialize with the other cats, but she would only cower behind her litterbox and lash out with her claws. She left her mark on a lot of us -- both cats and people!
My mother and I visited her regularly, but made no headway. At this rate, Abby was never going to become adoptable, so I decided to take action. One day, I managed to reach in and get my arms around her with only minor injuries to my face. I brought her out of the cage, and to my amazement, she suddenly went completely submissive! She curled herself tightly into my shoulder and buried her face against my neck.
So I held her that way for awhile, rocking gently and murmurring to her, trying to let her know there was nothing to be afraid of. Eventually, she made a tentative little move to indicate that she wanted down, so I lowered her to the floor. A couple of the other cats immediately came over to say hello to her, and suddenly she was hissing and lashing out again. I picked her up and tried to calm her, but she would have none of it, so I returned her to her cage.
Similar visits occurred regularly for the next six months. Abby never got truly comfortable with me (or anyone else), never accepted the other cats, never showed any sign of improvement. But then, miraculously, someone adopted her! I was thrilled... but it turned out to be a disaster. Abby hid under a bed for nine days, coming out only when the woman SHOVED her out with a vacuum-cleaner attachment! I asked the woman to let the shelter have her back, and my wonderful mom decided to adopt her. We just couldn't bear to see her go back into a cage.
My mom worked so hard at winning Abby's trust. When Abby hid under a bed at my folks' house, my 78-year-old mom crawled right under there with her to deliver warm milk-substitute and have a quiet chat. When it became clear that Abby was not able to accept the other two cats in the house, my mother set her up in a room all her own. Over the past couple of years, my mother's efforts have brought Abby a long, long way.
But she still spends most of her time hiding in inaccessible places, and often hides even from my mom. She's terrified of leaving her room. Yet she also watches the other cats through a French door and imitates their behavior... bats eagerly at a certain toy my mom dangles for her... it's so clear that Abby longs for play and companionship. If only we could ease her fear, I know she WANTS to be a normal kitty!
And on top of all that, poor Abby has developed a blockage that causes the tears from her left eye to spill out onto her cheek, rather than draining down into her nose as they should. The constant moisture has caused a raw patch on her face that crusts over and has to be cleaned as often as Mom can get her to allow it. It must hurt terribly, and I feel the pain is probably contributing to her anxiety.
So here are my questions:
1. Early on, we tried spray Feliway, but it didn't seem to help. Should we try a Feliway Plug-in? Are they significantly more effective?
2. We also tried Rescue Remedy, to no avail. Are there other herbal concoctions we should try? Are they really, truly safe?
3. We have NOT tried drugs, but we are willing to if we can be certain they are safe and cannot do her lasting harm. Does anyone have experience with anti-anxiety medications for cats? Any recommendations?
4. For two years, we have gentled Abby along, hoping she would gradually relax, but progress seems to have ceased. We wonder if we should take a different approach, perhaps bringing Abby together with Dylan and Sassy and both my parents in a small room with no hiding places, and just sitting together for a few hours. Our idea is that such an "encounter group" (or perhaps a series of them) might force everybody to get past the novelty of togetherness and finally calm down! Are we completely crazy to even think of this?
5. We are saving up to let Abby have surgery that may or may not succeed in unblocking the passage into her nose and allowing her tears to drain correctly. Does anyone have experience with this kind of surgery? We'd love to have input.
If you've stuck with me through this long tale, thank you so much. My family and I will be deeply grateful for any recommendations you can give us. We love Abby so dearly, and we want so very much to see her relaxed and happy!