I can't believe it has been so long since I've last posted. In fact, when I went to sign up for Secret Santa, I realized that I couldn't due to the fact that I had posted so little this year. Suffice it to say I was disappointed. But, it was just the push I needed in order to log in and post an update on where I have been, how I am, and what my furry little family has been up to.
As for me, this year has been nothing short of difficult. I have been struggling with an eating disorder since I was 8 years old. And, over time, it has waxed and waned in severity. But, with the diagnosis of diabetes last year and some major health issues both before and after, the damage I was doing to my body was definitely going to take its toll on me. I entered a partial hospitalization program in April for my eating disorder and was in that program until they stepped me down in June. Once I moved on to the less intense program, I relapsed. In July, I was given the ultimatum that either I go to residential/inpatient treatment or lose my treatment team. I did choose to go to treatment and spent the majority of my summer in Arizona at a residential facility specializing in the treatment of anorexia and bulimia. Once home, I returned to the partial hospitalization program, but in a more intense track. I've been there since and made a 6 month commitment upon entering the program which means I am just one month in. I will eventually step down, but not as of yet. I'm likely looking at another month of the day treatment program and then I will go down to a less intense schedule. During all of this time (well, since I left for residential), I have been out of work on FMLA. My time on leave ends next week and I've started the process of returning to work. However, since I will still need scheduling accommodations, I may only be able to return part-time. And, that is troublesome as I will need to continue my insurance with Cobra until I am reinstated full-time.
While I was in treatment in Arizona, I developed acute urinary retention. I was sent to the hospital and was given a foley catheter. I thought it would be temporary, but, as it turns out, I have not been able to urinate on my own since the beginning of July. I did see a urologist in Arizona who did some testing, but it wasn't until I returned to Cleveland that the real information came in. My urologist here at the Cleveland Clinic removed my catheter and taught me self-catheterization. It is not comfortable and inhibits my life greatly, but the foley catheter was worse -- often causing serious kidney and bladder infections that left me debilitated. I had a cystoscopy and urodynamics test this past week and we confirmed that my bladder is normal, with no obstructions. However, I was still unable to void and my doctor informed me that I had a few options as far as continued to treatment: continued self-catheterization, a trial with a supra-pubic catheter, or surgery to implant a "bladder pacemaker." I am opting for the latter option and am now just waiting on certification from my insurance company. I hope it comes sooner rather than later, but it feels good to know that there is hope for a more normalized life for the future.
My roommate took care of the cats (and my dogs and other pets) while I was away and they're all doing well. Prior to my leaving, my Cassidy became very ill. Hers is a long story, but the short of it is that she had been vomiting for some time before the diagnosis of an abdominal (intestinal) mass was made. I was bracing myself for the cancer diagnosis, but, following surgery, it was determined that the mass was benign. She has made a complete recovery since then and is in better health than ever. And, I am so grateful that my ginger girl is doing well and will be with me for the long haul. The other kitties are happy and healthy also. Finny still struggles with asthma, but his medications appear to be keeping more serious issues at bay. Delaney has been a bit skittish since I returned, but we are working on that relationship and she seems more trusting with each passing day. Emory is, well, Emory. She's a bit more ornery than I remember, but she is still my sweet torti girl. And, Guinness is forever a goof. I think he'll always be a perpetual kitten. The dogs are also doing well. Madeline had a run in with a pitbull in June and required surgery for her injuries. But, she's doing fabulously and the only reminder of that fateful event is a small scar on her left flank. Mackenzie had a rough summer where skin issues are concerned, but, she too, is doing better every day. Everyone else is still hanging in and I am so thankful to be home with my loved ones. It's amazing how much I missed them, but even more awe-inspiring how thoughts of them kept me pushing through. I'm so very lucky to have them in my life. For, without them, I don't know if I'd be here to type this post right now.
So, that is the abridged version of why I have been MIA for so long. Please know, though, that I have thought of you all often. And, I am excited to be back. I just need to keep myself from isolating and make it a point to visit the site, read your posts, and share. It was far too long before posts this last time. And, I am not going to let that happen again!
As for me, this year has been nothing short of difficult. I have been struggling with an eating disorder since I was 8 years old. And, over time, it has waxed and waned in severity. But, with the diagnosis of diabetes last year and some major health issues both before and after, the damage I was doing to my body was definitely going to take its toll on me. I entered a partial hospitalization program in April for my eating disorder and was in that program until they stepped me down in June. Once I moved on to the less intense program, I relapsed. In July, I was given the ultimatum that either I go to residential/inpatient treatment or lose my treatment team. I did choose to go to treatment and spent the majority of my summer in Arizona at a residential facility specializing in the treatment of anorexia and bulimia. Once home, I returned to the partial hospitalization program, but in a more intense track. I've been there since and made a 6 month commitment upon entering the program which means I am just one month in. I will eventually step down, but not as of yet. I'm likely looking at another month of the day treatment program and then I will go down to a less intense schedule. During all of this time (well, since I left for residential), I have been out of work on FMLA. My time on leave ends next week and I've started the process of returning to work. However, since I will still need scheduling accommodations, I may only be able to return part-time. And, that is troublesome as I will need to continue my insurance with Cobra until I am reinstated full-time.
While I was in treatment in Arizona, I developed acute urinary retention. I was sent to the hospital and was given a foley catheter. I thought it would be temporary, but, as it turns out, I have not been able to urinate on my own since the beginning of July. I did see a urologist in Arizona who did some testing, but it wasn't until I returned to Cleveland that the real information came in. My urologist here at the Cleveland Clinic removed my catheter and taught me self-catheterization. It is not comfortable and inhibits my life greatly, but the foley catheter was worse -- often causing serious kidney and bladder infections that left me debilitated. I had a cystoscopy and urodynamics test this past week and we confirmed that my bladder is normal, with no obstructions. However, I was still unable to void and my doctor informed me that I had a few options as far as continued to treatment: continued self-catheterization, a trial with a supra-pubic catheter, or surgery to implant a "bladder pacemaker." I am opting for the latter option and am now just waiting on certification from my insurance company. I hope it comes sooner rather than later, but it feels good to know that there is hope for a more normalized life for the future.
My roommate took care of the cats (and my dogs and other pets) while I was away and they're all doing well. Prior to my leaving, my Cassidy became very ill. Hers is a long story, but the short of it is that she had been vomiting for some time before the diagnosis of an abdominal (intestinal) mass was made. I was bracing myself for the cancer diagnosis, but, following surgery, it was determined that the mass was benign. She has made a complete recovery since then and is in better health than ever. And, I am so grateful that my ginger girl is doing well and will be with me for the long haul. The other kitties are happy and healthy also. Finny still struggles with asthma, but his medications appear to be keeping more serious issues at bay. Delaney has been a bit skittish since I returned, but we are working on that relationship and she seems more trusting with each passing day. Emory is, well, Emory. She's a bit more ornery than I remember, but she is still my sweet torti girl. And, Guinness is forever a goof. I think he'll always be a perpetual kitten. The dogs are also doing well. Madeline had a run in with a pitbull in June and required surgery for her injuries. But, she's doing fabulously and the only reminder of that fateful event is a small scar on her left flank. Mackenzie had a rough summer where skin issues are concerned, but, she too, is doing better every day. Everyone else is still hanging in and I am so thankful to be home with my loved ones. It's amazing how much I missed them, but even more awe-inspiring how thoughts of them kept me pushing through. I'm so very lucky to have them in my life. For, without them, I don't know if I'd be here to type this post right now.
So, that is the abridged version of why I have been MIA for so long. Please know, though, that I have thought of you all often. And, I am excited to be back. I just need to keep myself from isolating and make it a point to visit the site, read your posts, and share. It was far too long before posts this last time. And, I am not going to let that happen again!
