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- Sep 18, 2018
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So Kiki (my now one and only child) has always been the bold one. She also had ALWAYS wanted to be THE ONLY CAT. She is fearless, sometimes aggressive, constantly alert and on-guard, and lover of praise from people (for a moment then she “squaks” at you. If you heard her, you’d know what “squak” means.... LOL.
So——— three months ago my partner and I broke up. It was sudden and final— and Kiki has not seen her since. For the entire year prior, Kiki had been traveling back and forth with me each weekend. So, weekdays at our home, just her and I— and weekends at (the only other human besides me that she really really chose.) Her symptoms started the week following the break-up. I could go through the entire process/story to this date (it has now been 2.5 months of non-stop vet visits (subcutaneous fluids every 3 days, me trying EVERYTHING under the sun to get her to eat—- blood tests, x-rays, ah crap- I’m sorry I’m exhausted and can’t think right now. Point is, I have taken her in time after time again, spent several thousand dollars on all different kinds of tests, and finally they decided a couple weeks ago that she probably has a heart disease… Now where they got that out of all of this, I’m not sure – but at the moment I had maxed every $ out on vets and emergency, and did not have the additional $3000 or any way to get it right then (and of COURSE, no other payment plans ) to do the next test they wanted to do. So I got firm and said, “LOOK! I have spent every single penny I have (and even DON’T have), and NO ONE is listening to me—- there IS something wrong with her!! And then proceeded to continue to list symptoms which I will not take the time to do at this moment, because my point in this whole thread is that I want to ask you – not those of you who have taken in an abused animal, as there is lots of information on what to do in those circumstances. I want to know and hear from those of you who may have had any animal that you love and care for and who lives in your home that you discovered was being sexually (or any other form) abused. I had posted a request privately on my Facebook page to some of my people, but all I really got work and cats and sad tears – I really really need to know what your experience was with the following questions. I’m not asking questions about the backstory I gave you – as all of that is just kind of show you what she has been tested for etc. – at this point it is pretty clear that She has been being abused for the last 2 1/2 months – they kept saying she was stressed from the change in relationship, she is sad, etc. etc. etc.… But here’s the thing, – my baby is not afraid dash of humans, she has been being abused for the last 2 1/2 months – they kept saying she was stressed from the changing relationship, she is sad, etc. etc. etc.… But here’s the thing, – my baby is not afraid dash of humans, of other animals, etc. and, she has never been treated for any illness whatsoever for the last seven years that I have had her – until this 2 1/2 month. When everything changed. My point is, we moved to an unfamiliar environment at that time- our own apt, but within a home that 3 others rent as well. Oh my gosh – I’m getting off the point. I am going to just post what I wrote and if you wouldn’t mind communicating any insights you have to the below questions I had, that would be fantastic. I’m sorry at this point I may have made grammatical errors, but I’m voice texting as I haven’t slept in the last two days well we’re trying to get her OK again. Right now she’s crying when she tries to poop and then she throws everything up immediately that she even has eaten. She sleeps under the cabinets in the bathroom, so I moved my down comforter on to my bathroom floor with my pillow and would sleep with my hand stretched out as close to her as she would allow so that she knew I was here. Now she has moved out onto the down comforter, but she spends most of her day there and if she hears noises runs back under the bathroom counter. This is not my child – she is a freaking bad ass. But this child is scared. OK – that’s all. Questions below. And please forgive me if I made any errors in this post – this is my first time here and I read through the information but probably could have given it more time – I was just desperate to hear something right away. Also, do not worry, I’m not asking for a veterinary advice – we have another vet appointment, the second one this week alone on Thursday for more follow-ups. And, she is going every single place with me that I go until we figure this out – although I started rebuilding my business a year ago, so most the time I can work at home with her so that she doesn’t have to be toted around. Thank you for listening, and your feedback to my initial request below.
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My request: If your cat has been sexually abused by a human WHILE they were yours/and/or STILL yours, I have a couple questions. I need to hear from those who have observed, experienced, cared for, known and loved their kitties while seeing strange behaviors develop, unexplained sicknesses, emotional changes, etc and knowing something was very wrong but hitting blanks at every test until the day you finally suspected and soon thereafter knew.
1) What were some of the “symptoms” that your vet (vets) kept trying to diagnose, and the various “conditions/illnesses” they diagnosed your cat with while the abuse was happening.
2) If you could briefly let me know what types of changes from the list below you observed during the abuse, and/or later recognized as attributed to that once you’d discovered it.
a) Behavioral Changes, Mannerisms, Etc
b) Physical Changes-Weight, Face, Sounds, Breathing, etc.
c) Personality Changes
d) Eating Habit Changes
e) Sleeping Location/Time Changes
f) Frankly, ANYthing that you believe applicable at all!
3) How did your cat act/react towards the perpetrator. If they knew them prior to the abuse starting, what were they like then vs. the time that fit the abuse?
4) What actions did you take to protect your cat thereafter, and to discover again the ways you could provide the safest, calmest, warmest, most loving, self-less, healing home for them - emotionally, mentally, physically.
*** I appreciate any experience you have to share, though I COMPLETELY understand how this may not be something you want to discuss. And to those of you— so so so much LOVE! And of COURSE, inboxing me your experience is awesome— though if you feel so led as to share it with others as well, so we may better identify the signs and take action, go for it! HOWEVER, I spent a great deal of my work day at the vet again, so I am going to disappear while anyone who chooses to share, does.***
Two final thoughts— please forgive the length of this request, though I suppose ya’ll know I’ve never been good at the whole “less is more” thing...
And lastly, please forgive this one, as I know I am asking a lot from you without “reciprocation”— but I do not want to discuss anything about myself and Kiki at the moment. My brain and heart are tired so please don’t take it personally.
Experiences will help, and we are taking one step at a time, though with each one I still hope that we hit a tide that rushes us away from this being part of her story. We will update you as soon as possible, and in the meantime—— BIG 
from The Mama and her Kiiiiiiiii
