Trying to guess how a shelter kitten is/will be with other cats

[spiderplant]

So we visited a kitten in a shelter about 2 weeks ago when she was an estimated 3 months old.  Her brother has been adopted since and is doing great in his home; he looks like a completely new kitten.  She is still available.  We were weary of adopting her because, when asked how she did with other kittens/cats, the shelter staff said she "mostly keeps to herself."  When we met her she was a tiny, skinny little girl who didn't seem quite interested in us/the other kittens.  When we held her she would crawl up onto our shoulders(very cute) but was otherwise not very affectionate.  Another kitten there behaved much more like what we're looking for: she ran up to the other kittens excitedly, seemed to want to be around them, rubbed all over us, and made eye contact.  Unfortunately, she was on hold for someone else and was adopted while we were there.  The kitten who is still available is said to be "very quiet" as well.  I've done foster care/volunteer work/feral work and I just can't remember a kitten who behaved exactly like her.  The closest would be a sickly runt kitten whom I took in as a stray and ended up adopting.  She was nasty to other cats for much of her life but eventually bonded to her big brothers(whom I still have).  My biggest concern is getting this kitten here and, after the "isolation period," having her be terrified of my five adult males or simply not want to play/cuddle with them.  We're thinking about giving her a try, though.  I just really don't want to have to return a kitten to the shelter if she doesn't work out.  Our main reason for wanting a kitten is one of our cats who absolutely loves other cats and acts like a kitten himself.  Of course, I love the way this kitten looks(selfish reason, yes and I feel bad that she's still in the shelter.

Soo.. my question: has anyone had a standoffish(she doesn't seem shy, I do great with shy cats kitten bloom into a cat-loving kitten/cat once they were adopted and out of the shelter?

 

[peachesxo]

Well, if she is skinny and uninterested and not too affectionate it is possible that that's not her actual personality because she is either a) not enjoying shelter life or b) sick. It is hard to determine a cats actual personality in the shelter because so many of them act different there than they would in a home because they are scared or overwhelmed or whatnot.

My kitten who I got just over a month ago was also very skinny/sickly looking, and though she would sit in my lap at the shelter she wasn't playful or affectionate, the shelter people said she didn't like other cats but I was positive they were confusing her with her brother who had been adopted (I had seen them both previously and he was the only one who hissed at others, not her)  - so I got her. She was EXTREMELY affectionate when I got her home (and still is). She was also very sick though, so after getting her treated for everything she blossomed into her real, playful, sweet self. She also loves my male cat and they play constantly though I haven't seen too much cuddling yet, but they are getting there. (Keep in mind they have not been together long as I had to keep her in isolation up until about a week ago, but the long wait till introduction definitely helped a lot in why they are getting along so well)

As for my male cat that I adopted as an adult in summer 2011... I wasn't even able to see all of him in the shelter because he was so afraid there. He was hiding in a box the entire time, and all I could really see was his face and front paws. He refused to come out. What made me adopt him was how much he purred and cuddled my arm when I stuck it into the box he was hiding in... he was literally clinging to me and I just couldn't leave him there, so I got him without knowing much about him at all, or even seeing his whole body lol. By the time I got him home he was a totally different cat. He adjusted right away, never hid, and turned into a super-affectionate cuddle-machine right off the bat.
 

 

[Ms. Freya]

Unfortunately it's hard to tell if she hasn't had much of a chance to be outside of the cage, especially since some cats have a completely different personality outside of the cage. Does the shelter have a kitten room where she can interact with other cats? Watching her in that kind of environment might give you some clues. If something about her is tugging at your heartstrings, though, I would lean towards giving her a shot - just be ready for a potentially long adjustment period.

For what it's worth, my Freya has issues with other cats - she has since we got her at approx 6-7 months (she finds certain cats intimidating). She loved our Cotton

, gets along well with Sybil, and has hit or miss days with Wendel. That being said, she take a long time to warm up to other cats and has never been cuddly with the others although she loves people. She'll accept cats and might even play with them, but won't sleep with them or groom them or anything.

Lots of our other members have multiple cats and I'm sure some will be along soon with more advice or experiences.