trouble socializing my 9 week feral Kitten

[feralSuki]

Hello everyone!
about a week ago I got a kitten from one of my coworkers, she was born to his "mostly outdoor cat." I didn't have too much information until I actually got her and took her to the vet. Come to find, she'd had basically no socialization until about 8 weeks of age, when I got her. I quickly realized I had no knowledge about feral kittens, but my vet said with lots of attention she will come around but warned me that the next month is crucial to her progress. The first few days were emotionally exhausting, I've always been a dog person, but had a cat growing up. I named my kitten Suki and began my research.

The first few days I let her roam around my room, but blocked off inaccessible hiding spots. She wouldn't eat the first two days but slowly began coming out. She used the litter box immediately. A lot of rescues recommend confining the kitten to a big cage or kennel with their food, water, litter box, and some blankets, so I got her a spacious pin. Upon further digging, I've found mixed reviews on this method. we are now a week in, and Suki will eat out of my hands and allow me to pet her while she eats. I try to pick her up about 4 times a day with a towel, while hand feeding her. She almost always hisses once, but as soon as she's in my arms: she's purring. I do not want to push her, but I do want her to progress. On the 4th, she unzipped her pin (she's proving to be VERY intelligent!) and got out, but I wanted to see what she would do. She explored around my room while I sat in my bed and watched netflix. I pretended she wasn't there, I didn't look at her. She jumped up onto my bed and laid down about a foot away from me. Eventually I put her back in her pin for the night. I spend a lot of time around her pin, laying on the ground next to her pin and talking to her. Some days are better than others. I had guests come see her yesterday, we let her roam around my room and she approached everyone, giving them a sniff, and retreating.

I guess I'm looking for some guidance from anyone who has experience with special kittens like Suki. Any advice? I want the best for her and I've seen her take huge steps in the mere week I've had her. Even though I didn't realize the journey ahead of me when I picked her up, I'm so thankful for her. Even when we have our hard times. I'd love for some feedback, if I'm approaching something wrong, please reach out, I'd love to be pointed in the right direction. I've watched many videos and read a lot of things, but I'd love for some experiences to be shared. I appreciate you for reading all of this, and hope to hear back soon!

 

[fionasmom]

What an adorable little girl! You are making great progress whether or not you know it and are instinctively doing the right thing, such as ignoring her to see what she would do when she got out of her crate.

It sounds as if you did not know much about her mother and the "mostly outdoor cat" could mean a lot of things. To me, it sounds as if she was socialized for the first 8 weeks with her siblings and mom which is a good thing. Rule of thumb is that by 8 weeks there is a good chance to have a feral kitten ( and she may not be entirely feral depending on the relationship your co worker had with the mom) become socialized. The fact that she approached your guests is also very good as that might have been a signal to her to run into hiding and not emerge until they were gone.

Does she have any interactive toys like a cat wand that you can play with? You did not mention that she bites your hand or plays roughly and that is a good sign if she does not as it means that she learned those manners from her siblings and mom.

Going at a slower pace as you describe with sitting next to her and talking is very smart. It sounds like the two of you are definitely on the right path to becoming lifelong buddies. She is eating out of your hand and allowing you to pat her when she eats which shows a lot of trust. Suki is going to continue to become much friendlier as she learns what it is like to live with you and becomes familiar with your home.

I don't have any issue with giving animals a place of their own where they feel safe. Any kitten who has come into my house has had a place of their own, usually a bathroom, for as long as it took to make them feel comfortable. I never give them the run of the house until they are well acclimated and secure. Crates and pens are fine as well and make the world less large and scary for a tiny animal.

Suki is going to be a wonderful companion and is probably very happy to have a place of her own where everything belongs to her.

 

[Babypaws]

Cute little kitty...it doesn’t sound like you need much advice you’re doing pretty good. Great progress in a short time.

 

[feralSuki]

What an adorable little girl! You are making great progress whether or not you know it and are instinctively doing the right thing, such as ignoring her to see what she would do when she got out of her crate.

It sounds as if you did not know much about her mother and the "mostly outdoor cat" could mean a lot of things. To me, it sounds as if she was socialized for the first 8 weeks with her siblings and mom which is a good thing. Rule of thumb is that by 8 weeks there is a good chance to have a feral kitten ( and she may not be entirely feral depending on the relationship your co worker had with the mom) become socialized. The fact that she approached your guests is also very good as that might have been a signal to her to run into hiding and not emerge until they were gone.

Does she have any interactive toys like a cat wand that you can play with? You did not mention that she bites your hand or plays roughly and that is a good sign if she does not as it means that she learned those manners from her siblings and mom.

Going at a slower pace as you describe with sitting next to her and talking is very smart. It sounds like the two of you are definitely on the right path to becoming lifelong buddies. She is eating out of your hand and allowing you to pat her when she eats which shows a lot of trust. Suki is going to continue to become much friendlier as she learns what it is like to live with you and becomes familiar with your home.

I don't have any issue with giving animals a place of their own where they feel safe. Any kitten who has come into my house has had a place of their own, usually a bathroom, for as long as it took to make them feel comfortable. I never give them the run of the house until they are well acclimated and secure. Crates and pens are fine as well and make the world less large and scary for a tiny animal.

Suki is going to be a wonderful companion and is probably very happy to have a place of her own where everything belongs to her.

Thank you so much for posting back! About the playing: Suki will watch me flick around a feather stik toy, but won't engage yet. She watches it very closely, making me think soon she will go for it. Here;s another bump I've hit: she won't eat treats. She'll only eat the wet food I have for her. I've read that baby food is a good idea (simple baby food that doesn't have certain ingredients) So I'm going to the store to get that tomorrow and give it a go.

Suki hasn't tried to bite me at all since the first day when I had to get her in her carrier to get to the vet (she was unsuccessful) but I try my best not to push her. I guess I'm trying to figure out the best schedule and balance of handling her and petting her to help her become more comfortable, because it does seem like shes very interested (like when she escaped her pin). Thank you so much for your feedback, I'm relatively new to the cat world and want to be the best mom I can be for her!

 

[feralSuki]

Cute little kitty...it doesn’t sound like you need much advice you’re doing pretty good. Great progress in a short time.

Thank you, I'm doing my best! The orogress is great, but some days she seems to regress and that is hard for me. But it's selfish for me to think progress is a straight line up, I have to remind myself how scared she must be! Thank you for the encouragement!

 

[dahlia]

You are doing great. I am impressed that the kitten came out with guests there. My former feral is 8 years old now and still won't come out if someone comes to the house.

 

[klunick]

Sounds like the two I got back in May. They had been living in somebody's barn. They would leave food out for Momma and babies to eat but never socialized with them. The day I came to pick two was the same day they had been caught. I didn't know that or I might have waited until they got socialized a little. There were four kitten total. When I got there, they were crammed in a crab pot with some food and water. Two were definitely wild and of course those were the two I intended to get based on the photo the lady sent me. Seeing how "crazy" they were, I ended up getting the other two who seemed more calm. Boone actually was asleep the entire time I was at the house.

We got them into the carrier and they were good on the ride home except one had pooped in the carrier and both had walked around in it. Once home, I got them into a bath tub with a little water and tried to clean them up. Not a good impression of their new mom but it needed to be done. Once cleaned up, I expected them to be somewhat friendly as they were pretty calm before. NOPE!! They immediately ran under my bed and stayed there for several days only coming out when they didn't know I was around. Any time I would poke my head under the bed, Boone would hiss at me and Gracie hid behind her brother. They would run away if I tried to grab them. I felt so defeated and unloved.

I kept trying to interact with them and eventually they accept that I wasn't going to hurt them. They would be out and about when I was around but would still run away if I moved. Then they'd come over and sniff me but run away if I moved. Then they'd crawl on me but run away if I moved. Slowly but surely, they got more and more ok with me and now they love me bestest!! I can't even sit without Gracie coming to sleep in my lap!

Point is, keep trying with them and let them adjust on their own timeline. You may want it faster but that's not how it works. They decide when to love you and eventually (and in pretty short time), they will.

 

[feralSuki]

Sounds like the two I got back in May. They had been living in somebody's barn. They would leave food out for Momma and babies to eat but never socialized with them. The day I came to pick two was the same day they had been caught. I didn't know that or I might have waited until they got socialized a little. There were four kitten total. When I got there, they were crammed in a crab pot with some food and water. Two were definitely wild and of course those were the two I intended to get based on the photo the lady sent me. Seeing how "crazy" they were, I ended up getting the other two who seemed more calm. Boone actually was asleep the entire time I was at the house.

We got them into the carrier and they were good on the ride home except one had pooped in the carrier and both had walked around in it. Once home, I got them into a bath tub with a little water and tried to clean them up. Not a good impression of their new mom but it needed to be done. Once cleaned up, I expected them to be somewhat friendly as they were pretty calm before. NOPE!! They immediately ran under my bed and stayed there for several days only coming out when they didn't know I was around. Any time I would poke my head under the bed, Boone would hiss at me and Gracie hid behind her brother. They would run away if I tried to grab them. I felt so defeated and unloved.

I kept trying to interact with them and eventually they accept that I wasn't going to hurt them. They would be out and about when I was around but would still run away if I moved. Then they'd come over and sniff me but run away if I moved. Then they'd crawl on me but run away if I moved. Slowly but surely, they got more and more ok with me and now they love me bestest!! I can't even sit without Gracie coming to sleep in my lap!

Point is, keep trying with them and let them adjust on their own timeline. You may want it faster but that's not how it works. They decide when to love you and eventually (and in pretty short time), they will.

Thank you for sharing your experience with me, all of the encouragement is helping immensely! What kinds of things did you do to interact with them?

 

[klunick]

Thank you for sharing your experience with me, all of the encouragement is helping immensely! What kinds of things did you do to interact with them?

You mean beside trying to crawl under my bed?? Pretty much the usual. Lots of types of toys. Those fishing pole ones, mice, balls with bells in them. I would lay on the ground near where they were hiding and just talk to them. Just letting them know I wasn't going to hurt them and they were safe. The first night killed me. They cried a lot. I knew they wanted their Momma. The next night, only cried a couple times. It got better and better. Just take your time and let the kitten come to you, even if that means she crawls on you and you remain still. She will learn you are safe.

 

[fionasmom]

klunick story of Boone and Gracie is much more typical of feral rescues, so Suki is really the exception to the normal expectation.

I might be missing something here, but if she is eating wet kitten food, that should be acceptable at this point. Not getting her overly interested in treats is really better as some cats decide that the treat is much better than the regular food and then you have that problem to deal with. As for baby food, it is usually reserved for cats who have a true problem eating, like sick cats. Some cats decide that, like treats, the baby food is much better than cat food and then you have to get them off of it as it does need supplementation if it is used for more than an emergency situation. If you do feed it, make sure it is Gerbers and/or that it does not contain any additives or flavorings.

I feed standard cat food of various brands, but there is a cat food and nutrition forum where you can get a lot of advice about what to feed Suki.

Some ferals do not mind giving up the feral status at all. Suki might be one of those who is quickly realizing that this is better than where she was before and this will make her socialization go very quickly. Almost all of my cats over the years, with the exception of a couple clearly abandoned pets, have been from feral parents or were adult ferals when they started to come around to my house and everyone made the transition to domestic cat.

 

[feralSuki]

klunick story of Boone and Gracie is much more typical of feral rescues, so Suki is really the exception to the normal expectation.

I might be missing something here, but if she is eating wet kitten food, that should be acceptable at this point. Not getting her overly interested in treats is really better as some cats decide that the treat is much better than the regular food and then you have that problem to deal with. As for baby food, it is usually reserved for cats who have a true problem eating, like sick cats. Some cats decide that, like treats, the baby food is much better than cat food and then you have to get them off of it as it does need supplementation if it is used for more than an emergency situation. If you do feed it, make sure it is Gerbers and/or that it does not contain any additives or flavorings.

I feed standard cat food of various brands, but there is a cat food and nutrition forum where you can get a lot of advice about what to feed Suki.

Some ferals do not mind giving up the feral status at all. Suki might be one of those who is quickly realizing that this is better than where she was before and this will make her socialization go very quickly. Almost all of my cats over the years, with the exception of a couple clearly abandoned pets, have been from feral parents or were adult ferals when they started to come around to my house and everyone made the transition to domestic cat.

Well since I've posted originally, Suki has seemed to regress a little bit. Today she swatted at me when I placed her new water back in her pin, but we came out to eat from my hand and accepted pets when she ate from her food bowl. I'm not sure if this behavior is normal, as she was seeming to really progress a couple days ago. As for the baby food, it isn't her diet, just a couple licks as a reward for approaching me, etc. but she is eating wet food! I made sure to get baby food that is safe for her, it is just chicken and water-no additives or other ingredients. I'm wondering if you have any thoughts on handling sessions? I've read that it's good to try and pick her up and swaddle her a couple times a day, but I really don't want to push it. If you have any more pointers on socializing her, I'm all ears. A lot of people are telling me that because of the last two days, it's unlikely she will ever come around. But It's only been one full week and I want to give her a happy life more than anything! Thank you!

 

[feralSuki]

You mean beside trying to crawl under my bed?? Pretty much the usual. Lots of types of toys. Those fishing pole ones, mice, balls with bells in them. I would lay on the ground near where they were hiding and just talk to them. Just letting them know I wasn't going to hurt them and they were safe. The first night killed me. They cried a lot. I knew they wanted their Momma. The next night, only cried a couple times. It got better and better. Just take your time and let the kitten come to you, even if that means she crawls on you and you remain still. She will learn you are safe.

I'm prepared to do it all haha! Suki still cries at night sometimes, is this normal after a week? Sometimes she will calm for a while if I talk to her or meow back (weird, I know, but it works sometimes!). I know sometimes they cry because they need something, but I'm wondering if she's still just lonely

 

[klunick]

I'm prepared to do it all haha! Suki still cries at night sometimes, is this normal after a week? Sometimes she will calm for a while if I talk to her or meow back (weird, I know, but it works sometimes!). I know sometimes they cry because they need something, but I'm wondering if she's still just lonely

I didn't have mine confined like Suki except that they were shut in my bedroom when I wasn't home and at night so it's hard to say if crying after a week is normal. Sounds like she wants out to run around more. Is there any way to keep her confined but give her more space to roam around?

 

[Silver Crazy]

Suki has seemed to regress a little bit.

That is pretty normal so wouldn't worry about it..its like they frighten themselves being so forward and have to think about it for a while.
You are doing well for the time you have had the kitten but would let her decide the pace she wants to get more social.
Let her come to you on her terms and never force anything.
Talk as much as you can to her especially if she starts crying..will learn your voice provides comfort where ever she is, and when passing a gentle touch on her head or tug on the tail just to get her more used to being touched.
Try a shoelace or string to teach how to play...gets a quicker play response with something so simple.
Take it slow and things will be fine.

 

[feralSuki]

I didn't have mine confined like Suki except that they were shut in my bedroom when I wasn't home and at night so it's hard to say if crying after a week is normal. Sounds like she wants out to run around more. Is there any way to keep her confined but give her more space to roam around?

I've had the door to the pin open for the last two days and she still cries last night wasn't terrible though with the crying

 

[feralSuki]

That is pretty normal so wouldn't worry about it..its like they frighten themselves being so forward and have to think about it for a while.
You are doing well for the time you have had the kitten but would let her decide the pace she wants to get more social.
Let her come to you on her terms and never force anything.
Talk as much as you can to her especially if she starts crying..will learn your voice provides comfort where ever she is, and when passing a gentle touch on her head or tug on the tail just to get her more used to being touched.
Try a shoelace or string to teach how to play...gets a quicker play response with something so simple.
Take it slow and things will be fine.

Okay I'll try the shoelace thing today! Thank you so much

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi! You're doing fine, and as mentioned by @silvercrazy ignore everyone who says that just because of a couple scaredy days she'll never come around.

Do you have a ticking clock? Muffle it with a towel and put it near her sleeping area, or try a heartbeat toy or a purr toy. Low volume classical harp music now and then is known to help relax kittens and cats as well .

 

[feralSuki]

A week ago I brought a kitten into my home without knowing she hadn't had contact with any people until the day before I got her (when she was trapped and handed over to me) putting her at 8 weeks old. She was born in my coworkers backyard, the only information I had before bringing her home was that her mom was The first few days, Suki hissed a little bit, but would come out and sniff guests, and was easily eating out of my hand. She would purr when she was being pet or handled. She even escaped her big kennel and began to roam around my room while I was laying in bed. I ignored her to see what she would do, and she ended up jumping up to my bed and coming over to sniff me. In the last two days, Suki has become very defensive, she's swatted at me and even tried to bite me when I was putting her down, or when I walked by to get some shorts from my dresser. It seems we are regressing with her socialization. I've never worked with any ferals before, and I'm not sure if this behavior is normal or if anyone has some helpful advice on how to help her become more trusting?

 

[feralSuki]

Hi! You're doing fine, and as mentioned by @silvercrazy ignore everyone who says that just because of a couple scaredy days she'll never come around.

Do you have a ticking clock? Muffle it with a towel and put it near her sleeping area, or try a heartbeat toy or a purr toy. Low volume classical harp music now and then is known to help relax kittens and cats as well .

I just ordered a heartbeat toy! Thank you!!!

 

[fionasmom]

I completely agree that kittens become bold and then scare themselves back into being less bold. It can also continue in some stages with rehabbed ferals but it does not mean that they are not progressing as pets or that anything is backsliding to where all the progress you made is now gone. Of the two recent ferals we brought in, both have adapted shockingly to being house pets, but still have tiny bits of feral behavior that might never go away. Elise does not want to be approached directly in the face, even for a pat, and will swat but she is more than happy to be picked up and cuddled and brushed.

I would keep up everything that you are doing for her. Cats, in general, can all have little quirks in their personality that stay with them. It sounds like with the door opened that she is happier, hence less crying. She may want more freedom, but you have to be the judge of what works and is safe.