Tips For Creating A Loving Lap Kitty

[tinkerbeltink]

I have a neutered adult male that is friendly, loving, and enjoys affectionate interaction with me. He's a wonderful pet except that he will sometimes bully the female. That's his only flaw. This slightly younger spayed adult female absolutely hates being picked up or held by humans. In addition, she never attempts to sit in my lap and rarely wants to be petted. She will, periodically, rub against my feet or allow me to pet her while she is in a resting position. She's a beautiful cat, but was a terror as a kitten. She caused damage to carpet and furniture and I, eventually, stopped it with claw caps and two sided tape. She was six weeks old when I found her. She has a sweet nature. She just doesn't enjoy physical contact. I would love to hear of ways in which I might encourage her to be more interactive with me. I have tried fishing pole toys, but I think she just doesn't have any interest in being lovey dovey. Any tips?

 

[abyeb]

Some cats just don't like being cuddled. If it's a personality thing like this, there's not much you can do. You can try gently petting her for a short time, then increasing the petting sessions to see if this makes a difference, but she might just not like it, and that's okay! Some cats just like their space.

As with anything, there are medical issues that you might want to check out, just to be on the safe side. How does she act otherwise? If she hiding excessively or showing fits of aggression? If so, she could have some anxiety, which, if this is the case, your vet can prescribe kitty Prozac. If she bites/mutilates herself, then it's possible that she has feline hyperesthesia, which would certainly make her not like being handled.

 

[tinkerbeltink]

Thanks for the answer. She rarely hides and looks incredibly healthy. In the evenings, she loves to lay on her back and nap, in the family room, with the humans. She seems to like companionship, but just doesn't have a need for physical contact. She has never been aggressive. We recently moved and these preferences of hers about being held are a little stronger than they were, but I am beginning to think it's just who she is. It's hard for me because I am a touchy feely pet owner. However, she is entitled to be her and she can't help it. I guess I will hope for the best and accept her for what she is.

 

[DreamerRose]

Mingo was like that. It took a year, literally, to get him to be more physical. He still doesn't like to sleep in my lap, but he will sleep at my feet or on the back of the lounge chair. He wants to be close. He will also climb up to my shoulder as long as he can see over it and is not face the chair. To get him used to being petted, I scratched him around the neck, ears, and chin as long as he could tolerate it, and now he will come up to me and put his head under my hand when he wants to be petted.

Jealousy also helped. My other cat, Lily, is the lap cat I wanted so badly. Mingo was a little stand-offish until I got Lily, and when he saw her getting so much affection, he had to get his, too. When I sit at the computer, he gingerly steps around the chair until he can climb on my shoulder. Then he puts his head under my chin and purrs contentedly. He will happily sit there in my arms until my arms wear out.

 

[sargon]

when she's eating, you could try petting her lightly. it can help build positive associaions between the food and petting.