This really hard...anyone have any advice?

[diane8704]

Originally Posted by KuramaTheKitty

So your NOT gonna have a baby?

Awwww, oh well. There's still hope right? Like that one person said, doctors can be wrong! I mean, when I was little, the doctor said I would never walk, but I can walk just like any other person now so, there's hope.

No, I am not going to have a baby. I am glad that you were able to walk, and you are right, there is always hope. I am 22. I have time. So, theres definitely hope for me.

 

[pat]

Originally Posted by diane8704

Thank you so much for your advice. It really does make sense. The biggest issue isnt necessarily the getting pregnant as much as it is being able to deliver a child. I know that my doctor told me right after the last few fracture x-rays that I would most definitely probably have to have a c-section. But I do have concerns, so I am going to make a "preconception" appointment and get all of my questions answered. I am also having to take a supplemental vitamin for iron because my iron is low, so I need to get that taken care of, but I had just gotten over a really bad upper respiratory infection, so my iron could have been messed up because of that.
Thank you for you advice, I printed out your post to look for the book. Were you able to get pregnant?

Hi Diane,
No I was not..in essence, I was too old (and this is NOT a comment saying do not try if you are 40 or over, but in my case, I think my progesterone levels started changing in my late 30's, and I didn't start trying to conceive until I was 39 (yes, I began trying during my engagement). We also ran out of money - another painful aspect of infertility. If we had not, there were other options we had not yet pursued. My "mistake" - I tried for that first year of marriage without getting a full workup..once I did, uterine polyps were found (which would prevent implantation as I recall) and then removed...how much better it would have been if I'd had that workup done immediately. I didn't find Toni's book until after that first year. We tried until I was 42+ and then the emotional toll was all I could take and the money we'd borrowed was gone.

So I do have a personal reason for urging you to get a workup now - it will give you all your options

 

[adriane]

Hi there!

I just saw this thread. Im truely sorry about all that happened. Its such a downer to think you are, and then you arent. You're not sure just how to feel. I hope this doesnt sound terrible or anything, but if you Did happen to miscarry right at conception, really .. as horrible as it sounds .. sometimes is a good thing. It means that something in the whole amazing grand process of making a human didnt fit just right.

I only say this because a year ago Sept 11th we lost a little boy. I was 20 weeks when we found out he had a genetic disorder - they said most of the time, the body knows and .. well .. miscarries. It was trisomy 18 (extra chromosone 18) and it was a mess. Heart defects, kidney probs, brain cysts, it was so hard. I carried him to full term and he passed away just 2 weeks before his due date. We never saw him alive (other than ultrasounds). We are fine now and dont wish things had been different. He really caused us to grow in SO many diffreent ways.

I really truely hope the best for you. I know its so hard to want something So bad and not get it. I just hope that its nothing serious.
I hope no one was offened by that, most of all you. Sometimes, I dont think that everyone knows about one of the many many reasons lil rose buds dont bloom fully.

 

[diane8704]

Pat and Alex: I am so sorry that you never got the chance to have a child. I truly am. And I appreciate the fact that you took the time to tell me everything I should before this goes any further. That means so much to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Adriane: You are right, and nothing you said offended me. And I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Thats terrible, to carry a child, and feel them move and then they never even get to take their first breath is heartwrenching. And I realize that the body aborts what isnt healthy. And I know that...besides this was sort of an accident anyways, but it prepared me in so many ways to realize what I wanted, and what sacrifices I would have to make to have a child, and raise them the best I can. Jeremy was disappointed. But as I said in earlier posts, I am only 22, I still have time, and it'll happen when its meant to happen, I truly believe that.

Thank you for your support, I appreciate it sooooo much.

 

[katachtig]

but it prepared me in so many ways to realize what I wanted, and what sacrifices I would have to make to have a child, and raise them the best I can. Jeremy was disappointed. But as I said in earlier posts, I am only 22, I still have time, and it'll happen when its meant to happen, I truly believe that.

It sounds that it is helping you focus on action plans and better understanding yourself. This is an opportunity to learn what you can expect and also you can learn about what you need to do to make yourself as healthy as possible. Nutrition is as important before you get pregnant as during.

Best of luck.

 

[lionessrampant]

You're only 22?? Hey, there's tons of time! One of my biggest mentors kept having to put off having kids for various reasons when she was in her 20's and finally had her first (who is one of my best friends in the world) at 32 and she's actually happy that his birth ended up being delayed.

As for weird periods, man, I hear ya. I'm not trying to get pregnant, I'm actually trying the opposite, and weird periods are the story of my life.

I'm so sorry that you had to go through all that you did. I understand how painful and stressful a situation like that must be. Here are some BIG HUGS from me, Leo and Lola.

I sincerely wish you the best of luck in conceiving your baby. I hope that the next time you try, your situation turns out happily. Also, best of luck with your delivery when you DO get pregnant (because I'm so sure that you will)!!! We women are extraordinarily strong creatures and capable of huge feats, including childbirth...in fact, exactly 20 years ago today my mother finished 26 hours of labor delivering me! And she had elevated estrogen levels and wasn't even supposed to be able to get pregnant, but now, she has me and my brother and sister

 

[wellingtoncats]

Aw I'm thinking of you!

 

[pat]

Originally Posted by diane8704

Pat and Alex: I am so sorry that you never got the chance to have a child. I truly am. And I appreciate the fact that you took the time to tell me everything I should before this goes any further. That means so much to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

You are welcome, if it has helped you in some way, I am very happy!

 

[evnshawn]

Originally Posted by Pat & Alix

There are also excellent forums and books out there on trying to conceive. One book that was excellent when I was trying (but a bit graphic) was by Toni W. called "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" - she now has a website and I think forums and ?? not sure..but here is her website

I wish you all the best - go get those fears put aside.

I just wanted to say that that book is AWESOME. Every woman, trying to get pregnant or not, should read it. (We haven't started trying yet, but we will soon, and I feel much more confident of our success, having read that book.)

Also:

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