Oh Fran
I'm getting in on this so late in the game, there is little I can say that hasn't already been said. Definitely check out the information that Susan (catsknowme) provided on NPD; that was my first thought as well as I read your original post.
Though he never abused you physically, he absolutely abused you emotionally: he told you what to wear (or not wear), cheated on you, played you like a yoyo.....in all honesty, it is a good thing that it is ending now because this has all the makings of something that could become physical one day down the line.
Emotional abuse, though it leaves no physical marks, leaves bruises on the heart that are just as bad as those left by physical abuse. It will take time, but you will get past this, I promise (coming from someone else who was engaged to an emotionally abusive man).
Why did you go through these past two years? No one really knows for sure. But I ABSOLUTELY believe that it will make you wiser and stronger in the end. Maybe you can use this experience to help other women who are going through similar things.
It's already been said, but staying friends with Ben will not help you in any way and, honestly, right now your life should be 110% about YOU. Do what makes YOU happy. Wear lipstick and eyeliner and all the clothes that Bed didn't "approve of" (
). Eat lots of ice cream. Dote on Teufel. Take long baths. Cry buckets. In time, it will all be so much better. I personally guarantee it.
Honey, please pm me if you ever want to talk. No one should ever have to go through this but it especially breaks my heart when that person is you.
I'm getting in on this so late in the game, there is little I can say that hasn't already been said. Definitely check out the information that Susan (catsknowme) provided on NPD; that was my first thought as well as I read your original post.
Though he never abused you physically, he absolutely abused you emotionally: he told you what to wear (or not wear), cheated on you, played you like a yoyo.....in all honesty, it is a good thing that it is ending now because this has all the makings of something that could become physical one day down the line.
Emotional abuse, though it leaves no physical marks, leaves bruises on the heart that are just as bad as those left by physical abuse. It will take time, but you will get past this, I promise (coming from someone else who was engaged to an emotionally abusive man).
Why did you go through these past two years? No one really knows for sure. But I ABSOLUTELY believe that it will make you wiser and stronger in the end. Maybe you can use this experience to help other women who are going through similar things.
It's already been said, but staying friends with Ben will not help you in any way and, honestly, right now your life should be 110% about YOU. Do what makes YOU happy. Wear lipstick and eyeliner and all the clothes that Bed didn't "approve of" (
Honey, please pm me if you ever want to talk. No one should ever have to go through this but it especially breaks my heart when that person is you.