Hey guys, so for almost 1 month now, I adopted 2 baby kittens (that were maybe a bit over a month old, I don't know for sure because I found them in my yeard). They were both scared to death of humans and I had to "trap" them to be able to take care of them. I managed to tame one of them (a white ball of fluff), I held her in my arms for a while, petted her and talked to her until she calmed down. And then I fed fer because she was starving. She still ran off after I let her down but in the next few days she became used to me and stopped running and hiding when she saw me. Her baby sister on the other hand, I had no such luck with her. To this day I am still not able to even touch her because she runs away every time she sees me. I tried to catch her but whenever I lay my hand on her she scratches/bites and hisses at me. I thought that giving her time, being near her, place food in front of her, being friendly with the other cats in front of her would make her more comfortable around me, but that doesn't seem to work. I really don't know what to do anymore. Do you guys have any suggestions?
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Taming A Feral Kitten
- Thread starter Kristynne
- Start Date
That does work. However, you also said this:
Let me imagine this in human terms. Your young, come from a difficult situation and don't really trust anyone. An earnest young man is trying very hard -- bringing you gifts, being patient, giving you time and room. Question: How long is it going to take? Answer: As long as it takes. He gets impatient, chases you around, catches you, holds you close while you squirm and scream. The next day, he acts like nothing happened and brings you a gift. Question: Now how long will it take? Answer: Longer.
I'm not trying to be a jerk or overly cute here, I'm being quite serious. The approach is, in general terms, to let the cat be the boss of the relationship progress. To spend time near quietly. To never ever grab, pick up or forcibly hold before the cat is ready. There are a few refinements...you can toss treats ever closer. You can actually feed 10 feet away one day, 8 the next and 6 the next. You can use a toy like a laser pointer that allows some distance, and bring it closer over a few days. Refinements, but you basically had the heart of it right, except for violating the number one rule -- to let the cat be the boss of the process. So while a month does seem like a long time, its probably not truly a month of doing the right thing. Somewhere in there you took steps backward. Why were things different with the first kitten? Because all kittens are different, even siblings. This is totally normal; some warm fast, some warm slow and require a much more careful approach.
Other issues to discuss:
(1) Vet care: Have these kittens ever had vet care? Unfortunately, you very much do need to catch rescued kittens to take them to the vet -- this should be done right in the beginning, so that it doesn't set back any progress.
(2) Spay/neuter: Assuming they have not had vet care, you don't know the true age. Its quite likely they were a good bit older than you thought. Even if you are familiar with kittens, there is a range of sizes per age, and kittens without a mom are not getting enough to eat. I once rescued what I thought was a 5-6 month old cat -- vet told me she was three years old, but starving on her own. You likely have a few months get them spayed/neutered within the recommended range -- but you might well already be in the recommended range.
(3) Home base/Safe Zone: Where is the kittens home base/safe zone? Meaning where does the kitten retreat too? What does on there? Just for example, I've heard some people start the kitten in their only bathroom. Which is terrible, because the toilet is probably scary as *&^!. A bedroom is most common, with the kitten spending a lot of time hiding under the bed. Is this your scenario?
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I tamed Demi by petting him with a long-handled duster. I also taught him a ton of words. Words seemed to be the key. 
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- #4
Don't get me wrong here, I'm not new to cats, I have 4 other cats of my own, two of which I had to bottle feed and raise them because their mother died when they were almost 3 weeks old. I'm in no way impatient or trying to catch or hold the baby kitten in my arms 24/7. I've only tried that 2 times because I thought that she would ease up a bit if she saw that I had no bad intentions, just like her sister.
I am spending as much time as I can with them and I tried placing food far and near her. I tried playing with her as well, but she won't play with me, she's just standing there, ready to run away. I also tried standing near her without making loud noises or sudden moves, just to let her know that everything is okay, but she's just as scared as the day I found her. That's the main reason I posted here, because nothing seems to work and I couldn't see at least a bit of improvement.
That little one, for whatever reasons, has a different outlook on life than the white one.
A thought - try literally ignoring the fearful one other than feeding and even then, don't look directly at her. Just be yourself and go about your business as usual. You could even sit on the floor somewhere that the fearful one can see you and work on your computer/phone, but again, don't look at the kitten. In other words, being looked at/focused on is frightening to her.
It will take as long as it takes, but I'm reasonably sure that the fearful one will eventually become less so. You have her in your home now, safe and loved. You have all the time in the world for this baby.
You could also try some softly played classical harp music - it is known to help cats relax
A thought - try literally ignoring the fearful one other than feeding and even then, don't look directly at her. Just be yourself and go about your business as usual. You could even sit on the floor somewhere that the fearful one can see you and work on your computer/phone, but again, don't look at the kitten. In other words, being looked at/focused on is frightening to her.
It will take as long as it takes, but I'm reasonably sure that the fearful one will eventually become less so. You have her in your home now, safe and loved. You have all the time in the world for this baby.
You could also try some softly played classical harp music - it is known to help cats relax
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- #6
Aww, that's really sweet. Ond of my cats is good with words as well. Sometimes I would swear that she understands me. She comes when I call her name, she understands when I say no and if I am pointing somewhere she would look and go in that direction. She's so smart! I'm very proud of her! Cats are awesome. But my new baby kitten is scared of everything I'm doing, I can't get to her with my hands or or other objects, because she would just run away.I tamed Demi by petting him with a long-handled duster. I also taught him a ton of words. Words seemed to be the key.
Kristy,
It seems like the vast majority of kittens can become comfortable in less than a week if there are no setbacks. Given that you seem to know what your doing, your right, this kitten is a tough nut to crack. But "catch, hold and show how nice it is" never ever works as far as I know. Maybe my initial post was too tongue in cheek since I was not intending to be critical. It is so incredibly hard to avoid rushing! I couldn't get my wife to avoid rushing and grabbing at our last rescue! But it really does set things back.
You got some maybe new strategies in the posts above, but I think the main ingredient is just relaxing about the time table and being patient. You have a slow to warm kitten. But he will get there!
Have they had a vet checkup? Among other reasons, you want to make sure the kitten doesn't have anything making them uncomfortable which could obviously make things harder.
It seems like the vast majority of kittens can become comfortable in less than a week if there are no setbacks. Given that you seem to know what your doing, your right, this kitten is a tough nut to crack. But "catch, hold and show how nice it is" never ever works as far as I know. Maybe my initial post was too tongue in cheek since I was not intending to be critical. It is so incredibly hard to avoid rushing! I couldn't get my wife to avoid rushing and grabbing at our last rescue! But it really does set things back.
You got some maybe new strategies in the posts above, but I think the main ingredient is just relaxing about the time table and being patient. You have a slow to warm kitten. But he will get there!
Have they had a vet checkup? Among other reasons, you want to make sure the kitten doesn't have anything making them uncomfortable which could obviously make things harder.
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Well the duster I used had a pretty long handle and was soft. I tamed him in 3 days.
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- #9
Thanks for the reply! I guess patience is the key afterall. I am laying down sometimes while playing with my other cats, letting them sit on my lap, petting them and all that. This scared little one will always get near me, smell me and then she runs back. I just wanna let her know that she's safe and has no reason to be scared anymore. I will give her space and let her come to me when she's ready!That little one, for whatever reasons, has a different outlook on life than the white one.
A thought - try literally ignoring the fearful one other than feeding and even then, don't look directly at her. Just be yourself and go about your business as usual. You could even sit on the floor somewhere that the fearful one can see you and work on your computer/phone, but again, don't look at the kitten. In other words, being looked at/focused on is frightening to her.
It will take as long as it takes, but I'm reasonably sure that the fearful one will eventually become less so. You have her in your home now, safe and loved. You have all the time in the world for this baby.
You could also try some softly played classical harp music - it is known to help cats relax
Oh my goodness, this is a HUGE thing for this little one to do - wow!
Yes, hang in there, you're doing a lot better than you think
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- #11
Thank you, I am trying to do my best! All of my cats are rescue cats. I took care of each and every one of them, took them to the vet, spayed them and gave them a safe environment to live a happy life. I love them so much and I've learned a lot about them in these years. And I am still learning, this is the first time I am dealing with a feral kitten and I was feeling a bit lost. Thank you for the support!Oh my goodness, this is a HUGE thing for this little one to do - wow!
Yes, hang in there, you're doing a lot better than you think
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- #13
I agree, trying to catch her may have been a bad idea. I thought that if it worked on her sister, maybe it'll work on on her too. Because her sister was just as scared the first time I saw her. She ran away, she was hissing, clawing and all that. But after holding her in my arms (I only picked her up because it was freezing outside and I had to bring her inside), feeding her, petting her and talking to her in the most nicest and calm way, she really calmed down. She still ran away from me afterwards but after a few days she came to me on her own. She let me pet her and played with me. That's the only reason I tried to do the same with her sister.
Of course I wanna take them to the vet. All of my cats are spayed, vaccinated and whenever I feel like there's something wrong with them, I'll take them to the vet. But I can't get the scared little one in the cage, like I mentioned, I can't get near her. I was hoping to take them both at the same time, that's the reason I've waited. There doesn't seem to be anything wrong with them though. They are both happy, playing with my other cats, they are eating their food and doing their businesses in the litter. And to answer your other questions, I didn't lock them away in a specific room, I decided to let them choose their space/place. The little ones love spending time/sleeping in higher places. They are getting along very well with my other cats so there's no "fighting" for territory or anything.
Anyway, I want to thank all of you for the replies and I'll just patiently wait for the little one to get comfortable with me.
This is wonderful to hear!!
So the little one is actually fully comfortable roaming in the house and interacting with the other cats? Hmm, maybe I can add a couple more little points. First, just be conscious of where the shyer one is, and make an effort not to vacuum, clank the dishes etc if the shy one is nearby. Also, watch how fast your walking if the shy one is around. Second, watch for when the shy one is sleepy in the favorite spot, and try to gentle approach and pet. You probably know this already, but when sleepy is often the easiest time for the first petting interactions.
As far as the vet goes, just leave the carrier open somewhere the kittens go. Throw some treats in there. Within a day or two you'll be able to just close the door when the shy kitten when in voluntarily. Lots of cats hate their carriers and this strategy is needed by many of us.
As far as the vet goes, just leave the carrier open somewhere the kittens go. Throw some treats in there. Within a day or two you'll be able to just close the door when the shy kitten when in voluntarily. Lots of cats hate their carriers and this strategy is needed by many of us.
Hi. My neighbor is dealing with something similar - 2 strays, although we think the young cat might actually be the baby cat's mother. But, we think the baby is nearly feral. Anyway, despite drawing in the young cat who now lets us pick her up, pet her, etc. the baby, up until a week ago, ran anytime it saw my neighbor. This has been going on for about 3 months or so. Now, the baby will watch my neighbor from several feet away but no longer runs away for the most part.
I saw on another post where a member caught a feral, actually got him neutered, and then kept him in her garage. Only just recently, after not being able to get near him, she had him cornered him in his hiding spot and put baby food on her finger and he licked it off. He liked it so much that he came out to eat some more - and, she was able to pet him!
As soon as my neighbor feels like she can do this with the baby, she is going to try it. Just another suggestion, along with all of the wonderful tips you have already received.
I saw on another post where a member caught a feral, actually got him neutered, and then kept him in her garage. Only just recently, after not being able to get near him, she had him cornered him in his hiding spot and put baby food on her finger and he licked it off. He liked it so much that he came out to eat some more - and, she was able to pet him!
As soon as my neighbor feels like she can do this with the baby, she is going to try it. Just another suggestion, along with all of the wonderful tips you have already received.
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The duster I petted Demi with looks something like this:
https://www.walmart.com/ip/Mr-Clean-Electrostatic-Long-Duster/745854632
https://www.walmart.com/ip/Mr-Clean-Electrostatic-Long-Duster/745854632
Hello and welcome to TCS. And thanks for rescuing those 2 little kittens, as well as your other cats.
It probably would have be best to put them in a room of their own, separate from your other cats, until you could get the kittens vet checked, but it's too late for that now. Have you been able to give them meds for fleas / worms? Are they litter box trained?
How old do you think they are? Here's the TCS article How Old Is My Kitten? that may give you an idea of their ages.
Here's a couple other article with tips on ferals:
I Found Abandoned Kittens - What Should I Do?
Handling Feral Cats
It probably would have be best to put them in a room of their own, separate from your other cats, until you could get the kittens vet checked, but it's too late for that now. Have you been able to give them meds for fleas / worms? Are they litter box trained?
How old do you think they are? Here's the TCS article How Old Is My Kitten? that may give you an idea of their ages.
Here's a couple other article with tips on ferals:
I Found Abandoned Kittens - What Should I Do?
Handling Feral Cats
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #19
Yes, she's very comfortable as long as I'm not around. And if I am, she'll keep her distance and watch my every move. Especially when I'm playing or petting my other cats. Sometimes she'll get close, smell me and run away a second later.
I tried placing my hand near her while she was in a sleepy state in her favorite spot. I didn't go too close to scare her, just enough for her to smell me. But she immediately "woke up" and started backing up and show her "scared face". It's this face she makes when she's really scared. Her eyes become really big, her ears lean down/back and she'll adopt the "I'm about to run away" position. Of course I'm trying to make as little noise and sudden moves as possible when I'm around her. If she's in her favorite spot, she doesn't seem as bothered by what I'm doing.
I'll try placing some treats in the carrier to see if I can get her inside, thanks for the tip. I was so focused on not scaring her that I avoided anything that could possibly make her feel unsafe.
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- #20
Thanks, I think I have one of those, I am just a bit afraid to not scare her even more. Because she's scared of the toys too.
