Something is wrong with me

[winwin]

Thank all of you so much for the very kind words, far more than I deserve, and please forgive me for the times I have appeared insensitive to your posts or said things contrary to what I should have, perhaps.

It was very hard facing my friends, seeing their son there in the casket, mourning the loss of what could have been equally with the loss of what was, OMG such a tragedy, such a waste of a beautiful promise, the world is a little emptier . . . .

We all should give thought to how our lives can turn on the circumstance of a half-second.

Thank you again, my friends.

Leonard

 

[laceydf]

Leonard, I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's son. 20 years old,

, such a tragedy...

There is nothing wrong with the way you reacted...in fact, I've done the same thing before. It's really hard to predict how you will react to something like that and you did just fine. If your friends know you at all, they know that you meant well and that you are a wonderful friend for being there for them in their time of need.

 

[rosiemac]

Leonard just be there for your friend just like you have been, because when i lost my dad a neighbour who had locked herself out of her house and was waiting for her husband to come home, saw my husband and myself come back home for a few things.

She told me this weeks later because she said she hid around the back of her house because she didn't know what to say to me?!.

You've no idea how much that hurt, so i always make a point of being there for someone in situations like that, even if they just want to ramble on.

 

[vespacat]

Like most suicide survivors, I felt an enormormous amount of shame and guilt about what I could have do to save my dad. I imagine your friends are feeling something similar. And I'm sure they're feeling the stigma of having a family member suicide as well.

When I lost my dad, my "friends" dropped off the face of the planet, and people often don't know what to say or feel uncomfortable with their own feelings about suicide that prevents them from reaching out to the survivors. I was left to battle these feelings alone, and it would have helped if someone had cared enough not to give up, and having a support network makes it so much easier to deal with the loss.

I would advise you NOT to keep silent. Be there for your friend and extend invitations to him for company, outings, etc. He may not be interested in talking much at first, so be gentle but persistent, and respect his space at the same time. He needs to grieve, but also needs to keep living a somewhat normal life or there's a good chance he may sink into a very deep depression.

 

[ugaimes]

I'm so sorry for your friend's loss

I am sure he understands how you feel- the fact that you went to the funeral told him that much. I hope the family is able to find some comfort through their grief

 

[ckblv]

I am sure they understand. That is such a terrible thing to happen. That poor family.

 

[mom of franz]

Leonard as a nurse who has had to deal scores of family and friends after someone has died, I learned one thing. There are no words, to make things better. The only thing the bereaved need, is a shoulder and a good hug...that says everything.

Suicide, no matter what the age is especially hard, but being young it just tears at your gut. I had a friend who killed herself at sixteen, we were friends since toddlerhood. The pain eventually changes but it never goes away. Just stay the good friend you are, that's the best thing you can do.