Separation anxiety? Or just anxiety from being new?

[hollie ordway]

Hello everyone! Welcome to my first post ever on TCS! I have a few questions about the little bugger of a cat I got a week ago from the humane society, named Adonis (because he's a real lady killer). I am not at all new to owning cats, HOWEVER, I AM new to owning cats by myself, on my own, as my own responsibility. See I grew up with cats in my family, but there were always other people around when I was away at work or school or what have you that could look after kitty so we would never be lonely. Fast forward a bit, and here I am in my own apartment, living on my own. However, I suffer from extreme anxiety and it was becoming harder and harder not having a little creature around to help me keep myself distracted and to a routine so I wouldn't ball up and succumb to my anxiety (have had anxiety and depression all my life, and only when I had pets did I feel better. Best therapy, I swear). So in comes Adonis, this beautiful cat who just stole my heart when I saw him in the "get acquainted room." He was instantaneously sweet, and his cat surrender questionnaire listed him as friendly towards family, but mostly solitary and quiet, and he was given up because a family member was moving in who was allergic. The humane society also attested that he was affectionate but oftentimes by himself and would come up to you when he wanted affection. I thought great, he would be a good cat to have seeing as he's a bit older (around three years) and I work. Including commute time, I am gone around 11 hours of the day. I know that seems long, but I figured due to his affectionate, but seemingly solitary nature, he would do fine by himself while I was at home. So I picked him up and whisked him away to my place.

He was, to be expected, a bit skittish. As stated, I live in an apartment, so he was a growler at the noises of the other people around him, but he has seemed to relax with that now. He is very affectionate and walked around like he owned the place on the second or third day. The week I have had him, when I was at work and then returned, he didn't seem to be in distress - he was not urinating or defecating anywhere but his litterbox, and it looked like he was eating all his food, which I would put down just before I left for work. When I came home, he would obviously want a lot of attention, and would run to me with tail held high and lots of headbutts. He gets playtime just before work and just before bed, and affection anytime he wants it.

However, I think I've got it in my head that I might be doing him a disservice leaving him alone so much for two reasons... One is his breed. While he was simply listed as a domestic longhair, I am around 70% certain he is a Ragdoll cat, or some mix of. He looks almost like a spitting image of many seal point ragdolls I have seen, and has the coat and has a tendency to go limp in my arms. (Ragdoll owners, please deny or confirm this - picture will be listed below!) I hear they are the greatest cats in every way, but are known to be needy of their people's attention and get depressed if they go too long without it. Second, I notice he has a habit of overgrooming or occasionally ripping his fur out. He has minor mats in his fur which he has had since I got him, and I have been doing my best to work them out of his fur with grooming. When he rips his fur out, it seems he is mostly focusing on the mats. Also, when we are playing, sometimes he'll be all into it just to suddenly stop and turn and begin vigorously grooming himself... Only to resume play again.

I guess what I am wanting to know is... With what I said, could his excessive grooming and hair pulling be results of separation anxiety? Boredom? Or do you think it's just because he's new to the apartment and hasn't totally familiarized himself with the place and my routines yet? I am trying my hardest to compensate for my time away with lots of play and attention, but I sometimes wonder if that might not be overstimulating him. Any thoughts, even if they are a bit outside of the box, are welcome. He really is such a sweet cat, and I only want what's best for him.

By the way, here's my baby!

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• hollie ordway
• Jul 13, 2014

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• hollie ordway
• Jul 13, 2014

 

[musicalcats]

He's just gorgeous! I think your ideas are spot-on. He
is certainly still adjusting and probably a little bored during the day when you're gone. My suggestions are pretty simple: enrich his environment with lots of toys he can enjoy by himself and possibly think about getting a second cat. Toys I'm thinking of: the circular hollow tube with ball inside to bat around, electronic chasing mice, electronic mice that make noise when kitty touches them, climbing shelves, cat trees, tunnels and tents, boxes, scratching posts and perches, and so on! A companion for him (and another for you!) is another option for keeping him entertained. Finally, talk to your vet about the fur chewing, it's possible that he has something medical
going on and be diligent about brushing him. Good luck and enjoy your sweet boy!

 

[hollie ordway]

Well the good news is his fur yanking has gone down over the last few days - he still does it to a small extent though, but oddly enough, it seems to be brought out by playing with things like wand toys, especially ones that make noise. I don't know if noisey wand toys are agitating him or what, but often times when I'm playing "chase the chirpy mouse" on the end of a stick, he'll be all into it and chasing it around only to stop and start cleaning/fur pulling in a very agitated manner... And then he'll go right after it again. 

 Almost like he's overstimulated or something. When I "downgrade" his playing to simply tossing something like a hair tie or furry mouse for him to run after, he seems less agitated and less likely to stop mid play and start grooming and fur pulling. He's a strange cat though, he doesn't often initiate play himself, but he'll happily participate if I try and get him to do so. Maybe he's just one of those weird cats who just don't enjoy wand toys?

I should be getting his cat tree tomorrow though, so hopefully he'll like that. I also ordered a Comfort Zone diffuser, just to see if it'll help him relax into his home a bit.

 

[musicalcats]

Progress is good news! Every kitty is different so yeah maybe he just gets over-stimulated with the wands. The Comfort Zone diffuser is a great idea: I have never used them personally but tons of people on here just rave about them. It's always great to hear of young cat parents like yourself taking such a passionate interest in enriching their cats' lives and being willing to work with their unique behavioral needs! Thanks for the update and keep doing the great job you're doing!!

 

[mythkeeper]

Hi!  Adonis is a beauty.  I just wanted to say that I just adopted a young female, approximately 3 years old, domestic short hair kitty.  She was overgrooming like crazy when I first got her and scratching too.  The vet thought perhaps she has allergies and so we went with a round of prednisone but it has been about 10 days since she has been off of it.  Also, we started her on a hypoallergenic diet.  However, I notice that with each passing day this excessive grooming has become less and less.  The vet also thought that this whole thing could be a nervous issue and as time goes on I think it absolutely is.

Anyway, Mattie, my girl, does the same thing as you describe.  Sometimes she will be playing and then wham, groom, lick, lick, scratch - then back to playing.  It is weird but I think they just get over stimulated.  I've been giving Mattie Rescue Remedy for the past four days and I think that has helped as well. 

It may be a good idea to have Adonis checked by a vet, but I do think there is a nervous thing going on.  It has to be difficult for these shelter cats to suddenly find themselves in a shelter, then in a new home - very disorienting and disconcerting.  So, it is no surprise to me that some of these kitties wind up with nervous habits for awhile.  Think of how we humans will bite our nails when we are nervous.

And, getting another cat would be great I think.   I wish I could get another one - I probably would if I thought that it was a wise idea but I'm near retirement age and may at some point have to move into a smaller place.

It sounds like you guys are so great for one another and it will be more rewarding with each passing day.

 

[hollie ordway]

I actually thought it might be an allergy of some sort, so I actually slowly switched him over to a diet much like yours that is hypoallergenic in nature - it was a slow transition from when I got him, an he's taken well to it, and hasn't developed anything like diarrhea, so I am happy with that. His overgrooming IS going down! I was mostly concerned about the yanking of the fur and how he was pulling clumps out, but that seems to have gone down as well. I have been giving him a lot of space and have really only been giving him a lot of petting when he asks for it (and he's very vocal about when he wants to be pet, but he definitely doesn't overstay his welcome.) He seems to be more favorable of a chin scritch than a full of body pet, so when I do want to pet him, I usually go for that, as it is a lot less likely to get him irritable. I have never heard of Rescue Remedy - I will need to look into it. I have actually just purchased a Comfort Zone diffuser and should get it in a couple of days - I am hoping that will help ease him into the house! Poor baby was in the humane society for only about a week before I got him, so it was essentially in from his old place into a new place without much transition. His old house had kids and dogs that stressed him out too, so admittedly I wonder if another cat is smart, since he expressed stress at dogs and kids. (Although they're much louder, I digress.) He also used to go out at night, so I am fearful the transition into an indoor cat into a (more than likely) smaller apartment is also stressing him out.

 

[hollie ordway]

Progress is good news! Every kitty is different so yeah maybe he just gets over-stimulated with the wands. The Comfort Zone diffuser is a great idea: I have never used them personally but tons of people on here just rave about them. It's always great to hear of young cat parents like yourself taking such a passionate interest in enriching their cats' lives and being willing to work with their unique behavioral needs! Thanks for the update and keep doing the great job you're doing!!

Thanks Musical - it's... Very different, to say the least. It was all by coincidence, but each of my old cats were very similar in personality: very laid back, cuddle bugs, who could have anything done to them and loved their people. It's a bit of a learning experience to have a cat with a personality like this, but I'll learn to adapt.

 

[mythkeeper]

Its good that you started on the Hypoallergenic diet so that even if the over grooming isn't due to allergy, at least you can rule that out.  I know what you mean about always having cats before that were snuggly - all of my previous cats were that way too.  IT IS different to have a cat that is nervous and standoffish somewhat and I too am learning many new things now that I have this shelter girl that is a very different sort of kitty.  I think it is great that Adonis will allow a chin scratch - he will probably warm up as time goes on.

I take two steps forward and one back with my Mattie.  Sometimes she is amenable to some petting, sometimes not AND she always wants to groom like crazy whenever I've been petting her.  She definitely doesn't stand still very long.  Patience is hard but so necessary with these rescue cats. 

Great that you started a Comfort Zone diffuser - I may try that as well.

 

[mycatworld]

Hmm, good question.You should make sure that she/he has many things and if you go out to long adopt a companion cat.