Resident once lone cat increasingly in funk due to new cat

[chat2008]

This is a new thread on our ongoing saga introducing an energetic 2 y.o. Russian Blue boy to our gentle lower energy 4 y.o. Tabby girl. The details of the see-saw introductions over the past 3+ weeks are on my other threads, so to cut to the chase:

The "funk" is that our resident now (1) refuses to hang out with its things (humans) in the living room anymore when the newbie is out and about- goes off to be alone instead; (2) little to no interest in play, and sleeps more than before; and (3) refuses to eat unless we feed her far way and out sight of newbie.

My questions is, how do we win our resident back, short of refostering the new cat and giving our resident the princess life back? Should we try returning to square one and reconfining the new cat 24/7 to the bedroom?

 

[stephanietx]

Give it time and stop stressing.  Your kitty will pick up on that.  It's only been 3 weeks.  It took my RB kitty 2 YEARS to completely return to her "normal" self when we introduced a second, much-younger kitty several years ago.  First of all, make a safe place for your resident kitty to retreat to when the younger one gets to be too much.  Secondly, always greet your resident kitty first, pet it first, feed it first, and acknowledge it first.  Fawn over your girl.  Seek her out and love on her.  Tell her she's your favorite and spend time playing with her separately.  Give her lots of love and attention.  Don't force her to do anything.  Let her set the pace. 

Additionally, you might want to look into using Feliway plug ins to help her decrease her stress or some calming agents such as Rescue Remedy or Spirit Essences.
 

 

[chat2008]

Stephanietx- you are so spot on... Just how fast things can turn for the better is staggering. After a couple of nasty days, our resident is suddenly 90% more relaxed around the newbie, as if a switch was suddenly flipped. They started the other night to chase in obvious fun, and now suddenly our female resident can eat even with the newbie male in close proximity; her tail no longer does the full "windshield wiper" beat but rather just moves the tip of the tail; she is letting up on territoriality and allowing the newbie to time share her spots without a challenge; and instead of redirected aggression, she now will respond affectionately and purr when stroked even when the newbie is close by.

My jaw is dropping at the change. I think you and others are so right that when we mother hen their every encounter, they sense the tension- that and the fact that one must let them work things out (after one has done the basic introduction protocol). Live and learn... If things regress again, we will stop sweating it and let things evolve now.

 

[stephanietx]

So glad she's doing better!!  Wonderful news!  Each cat is different and some just take longer, even though we wish they would become fast friends overnight.