Rescue Kitten Died Yesterday...

Maine1985

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The title says it all. My wife and I are absolutely devastated...

Last week, while out with a volunteer organization, I rescued a beautiful little kitten from behind a convenience store. I was told from a trustworthy authority that the mother had not been seen for a few days and that if someone didn't intervene, the little guy would surely pass. To make a long story short, he quickly became a part of our family.

The next day, we immediately took him to the vet. He was in 'good health', according to our vet. Over the following six days, he failed to develop a 'healthy' appetite. We essentially had to squeeze the bottle into his mouth for him to start feeding. Moreover, he refused to drink water...so the only water he consumed was what was in his formula. We followed the vet's directions and just kept on being persistent with feeding him. We held him constantly, kept him warm, and just loved him as much as we could. My wife and I both gleamed with joy when he slept an entire night uninterrupted and when he used his little litter box (one of the cutest things I have ever seen). However, he had consistent diarrhea and vomited twice over the same 6 day span.

Yesterday morning, we woke up and our little guy simply refused to eat. We had to run an errand so we put him in his box, covered him up, and returned just 90 minutes later to find him lethargic and unable to support himself. We took him to the vet and she immediately warmed him up and started giving him glucose. He improved, according to the Dr. We were ecstatic. Then, on the way to pick him up, we get a call saying that he was once again declining. The doc gave him a bolus and said that if the bolus didn't work, something 'else' may be going on...well, the bolus didn't work. We arrived at the vet to find our little guy motionless, breathing, with his eyes rolled in the back of his head. Lastly, the vet said that a few minutes prior, our little guy had bloody diarrhea...

We asked the vet how this could have happened. She mentioned head trauma. Impossible, as he was kept in a large box, free from all dangers, while we were not present. When we were present, he was always in our arms. We treated him like a fragile piece of glass. I couldn't help but be upset. My wife and I are both professionals with a long history of being outstanding pet owners...that comment, on top of the false hope of having our little guy back in our lives just tore me apart.

Not really sure I expect by typing this. I'm currently at work and had a miserable day. I apologize for any grammatical errors, as I wanted to type this quickly to avoid crying. Thanks for all questions/comments.
 

CatCrazy777

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I think you and you're wife both did a wonderful and precious thing by caring for this kitten. I feel as if for the short time he was with you both he was happy and felt loved. I can't imagine how you're feeling, but I wish you all the best and send my condolences.
 

tinydestroyer

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I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your wife are special people, because you gave this little kitten unconditional love for his short life. He surely would have died sooner without your intervention, and though it was devastating when he left, he left having known warmth, and love, and happiness.
I don't know if this helps, but I doubt you or your wife did anything to traumatize this little baby. If anything, he might have suffered an injury before he came to you, and only showed symptoms later as he grew more. However, it is not uncommon for kittens to fade fast when they're very small, even under the best circumstances. You did an amazing job caring for him, and should feel no guilt. Please feel free to come to us if you need to vent.
 

1 bruce 1

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Hi!
I think/assume the vet meant head trauma before you found him.
Thank you for giving your all and everything to this baby, that meant he had warmth, comfort and love.
RIP darling sweetheart, you didn't have time but you gave joy.
Yep on the head trauma comment from the vet.
It sounds like he never was really thriving like a normal kitten when you got him, and the failure to develop a healthy appetite is suspect IMO that something happened before you even knew he existed. =(
It's absolute BS to our emotions when we take on something like this only to have them pass from something that's unavoidable and impossible to fix despite all our efforts and vetting immediately.
I know it's one of the hardest things we deal with. I doubt this helps, but maybe in a few weeks time it will...
had you not taken him in, had you not tried what you tried, had he not been vetted he would have probably died lonely and scared under a smelly, damp dumpster vs. being taken care of by you and loved with all the love you could give.
Something wasn't right with this poor little guy IMO way before you found him. If Mama cat left him alone, or moved the litter and left him behind, it's Nature's (rather nasty) way of saying "something isn't right with this one". A kitten should be eating you out of house and home, and latching onto your pant leg, and being robust, crazy and funny and full of energy and it doesn't sound like he was. You took him in, fed him what he would eat, vetted him a lot over a few short days and gave him all the love you could possibly give.
This wasn't your fault. It wasn't anyone's fault but I know you hurt. Been there.
Grieve but don't beat yourself up. You did nothing wrong and everything right IMO.
 

Margret

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M Maine1985 , I'm so, so sorry to read your post. I'm also sorry that it took a tragedy to bring you the The Cat Site, but welcome anyway; you clearly belong here.

Everyone else is correct when they tell you that this kitten was clearly in very bad shape when you got him. As for the vet's comment about a head trauma, I'm sure she must have meant before you got him; it's a pity she didn't make that plain to you. Also, I rather wonder why she said he was healthy, when it's clear that he wasn't.

You did absolutely everything you could for this little mite, much more than most people would, and even though you couldn't save his life what you did manage to do was beyond price - he did not die alone and unloved, and he knew that. This is so, so important.

Please remember that The Cat Site is a community, to which you now belong. You can come here any time you need a shoulder to cry on. Also, be aware that this is a community that knows that there's no such thing as "just" a cat. This kitten was a member of your family, and everyone here understands the grief of losing the smallest members of our families.

Please see this thread: Grieving. You may find it helpful.

Margret
 

1 bruce 1

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M Maine1985 , I'm so, so sorry to read your post. I'm also sorry that it took a tragedy to bring you the The Cat Site, but welcome anyway; you clearly belong here.

Everyone else is correct when they tell you that this kitten was clearly in very bad shape when you got him. As for the vet's comment about a head trauma, I'm sure she must have meant before you got him; it's a pity she didn't make that plain to you. Also, I rather wonder why she said he was healthy, when it's clear that he wasn't.

You did absolutely everything you could for this little mite, much more than most people would, and even though you couldn't save his life what you did manage to do was beyond price - he did not die alone and unloved, and he knew that. This is so, so important.

Please remember that The Cat Site is a community, to which you now belong. You can come here any time you need a shoulder to cry on. Also, be aware that this is a community that knows that there's no such thing as "just" a cat. This kitten was a member of your family, and everyone here understands the grief of losing the smallest members of our families.

Please see this thread: Grieving. You may find it helpful.

Margret
:grouphug:
Even though I'm not the thread starter, your uplifting messages always make me feel happy, Margret Margret .
 

catsknowme

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:alright: Condolences on your tragic loss of your sweet kitten. It was not supposed to end this way and not so soon. Kittens are so tiny, so fragile, so vulnerable, especially born feral. I wish that you could have been given a more definitive answer as to what was wrong. Please know that your little one knew love, comfort and joy before he left this realm. He has returned to the ancestors and those yet to be born. May your wife and you receive many blessings for rescuing him; one of the most gut-wrenching facts for me is that you were offering him such a very special future. :bawling:
 

di and bob

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I am so very sorry for your loss. If there was trauma, I'm sure it happened before you brought him home. The symptoms sound like distemper too, were blood tests performed? It also could have been a kitten that was a victim of 'failure to thrive' or 'fading kitten' syndrome. and had been abandoned by the mother because she sensed this. No what why the cause of death it happened and now you are left here with a broken heart.
I pray you can take comfort in knowing the kitten was helped so much with your care and loving concern. To die alone with no one to mourn you or to send you off with love in your heart and soul is a tragedy beyond compare. You gave him so much more than he can ever repay, more than you will ever know. There will always be a tie to his tiny soul, he will be forever held secure in loving hearts.
I know this hurts, it hurts so much now and will hurt for a long time. Because you have a loving heart and a loss like this is confusing and too sudden to take in and understand. He is at peace now. for him the pain is gone. We here at this site understand your pain, and although we cannot take it away, we can share your grief and take on some of the pain as our own.
Do not let this stop you from opening your heart again to another little soul in need. There are so many out there, and too few people like you who care enough to take on the care and responsibility of a tiny kitten who is in need. My heart goes out to you, I'll keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. Take care and thank you for letting us no of this sweet little boy, he deserves to be mourned by many. RIP precious angel. You will be forever missed, you will be securely held in loving hearts. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!
 

les26

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I am so sorry this happened to you and can't add any more than what has already been said, but the love and compassion that you showed this little one makes God and St. Francis and St. Gertrude smile, to see you reach out like that, but he was destined to go to Heaven early for some reason that we'll never know, but he knew love in that short time he was with you and has taken that with him to the next life.

I know it is always so so hard to try everything in our power only to still see them pass, but that tells me that it was time for him to go. Maybe he would have lived but have had many health issues, so maybe even though you don't think so the best option for him was to go to the next life where he is fine now, just fine, and you will meet again one day and he will say "thank you" for helping me many years ago.

"Their last breath on Earth is their first breath in Heaven" :rbheart:

I am so sorry for this loss, I hope that your hearts heal a bit more each day, he is fine now, God Bless.....:alright: :grouphug: :rbheart:
 
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Maine1985

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First, I would like to thank each and every one of you for taking the time to comment. The kindness and thoughtfulness behind each and every post makes me proud to be a new member of this amazing community. My wife and I took the time to read through each comment, and we truly cannot thank you enough for your time and sincerity.

Our boy was estimated to be around 3 weeks of age at the first vet visit. The vet only held him and showed us how to stimulate him to go to the bathroom. He was not thoroughly examined, as we were told that he was too young to do anything 'substantial'. We were told that our only job was to feed him and keep him safe. We have always had dogs (my wife was raised with both, however, she never had a kitten), so we were unsure as to whether or not this was routine given the young age of our little guy...(note, the vet at the first vet visit was not the vet we had at last vet visit).

Regarding the time surrounding his decline, everything just seemed surreal and rushed. We were never sat down, nor did the vet fully explain everything that was going on. Everything was done standing, walking, or over the phone (we were told to leave and come back a few hours later). I understand that these situations can be difficult for both the parents and the vet, but my wife and I both seem to be in agreement that things were not handled well and that perhaps we need to look for a new vet in the future...

As for the 'head trauma' comment. I originally took it as a comment regarding something that may have happened before we even knew our little guy existed. But our vet went on to say that it would have been more immediate (i.e. the past 24 hours), like falling off of a piece of furniture the night previous, for example After explaining how that diagnosis was impossible, she then went on to mention a virus that may have caused it, but that she wasn't going to run any blood tests. Then, she mentioned that it may have been something congenital. Between the various differential diagnoses and the moment of hope she gave us earlier that day, our heads were spinning in all different directions.

Last night, I didn't know why I needed to write. I simply knew that I just had to 'let it out'. Well, I surely made the right decision. Again, your responses have brought much-needed clarity, hope, and insight. This has deeply affected us. Looking back, it is amazing how an animal can just look into your eyes and immediately become a part of your family. It is a phenomenon that I have been fascinated by since I was a young kid. When the time is right, we will try this again. Having always had dogs, this was the first time I truly experienced a loving relationship with a cat, and it is an experience that I hope to have again in the future. Thank you all.
 

Furballsmom

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I remember thinking as I watched the posts keep coming, that the outpouring from members was amazing to witness. Something about your and his story really touched people here!

I'm beyond thrilled that this didn't cause you to turn away from possible future interactions with the amazing species that is feline :petcat: . (--and a different vet sounds like a very good idea too, by the way.)

Bless your hearts, both of you, you're amazing people and I am so glad you found this site.
:purr:
 

Mamanyt1953

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Rest you gentle, Sweet Baby, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever, your tiny life had meaning, and you are mouned by more people than ever you knew existed.

I am so very, very sorry that your kitten failed to thrive, but, OH GOD I am so filled with joy that he knew love and comfort during his short life. He DID NOT die alone, hungry and frightened, but slipped away in the arms of love. Well done, my New Friend. To you and your wife, well done. Yes, you certainly belong here among those who know, who understand.
 

1 bruce 1

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:alright: Condolences on your tragic loss of your sweet kitten. It was not supposed to end this way and not so soon. Kittens are so tiny, so fragile, so vulnerable, especially born feral. I wish that you could have been given a more definitive answer as to what was wrong. Please know that your little one knew love, comfort and joy before he left this realm. He has returned to the ancestors and those yet to be born. May your wife and you receive many blessings for rescuing him; one of the most gut-wrenching facts for me is that you were offering him such a very special future. :bawling:
What stinks so bad is veterinary medicine has grown leaps and bounds for years...but sometimes the diagnosis is a mystery. Even the best vets on the planet can diagnose a lot of stuff...but some things can't be diagnosed (fading kitten, etc.)
Had that happen to a dog with very vague symptoms that could have pointed to almost anything...but blood work was excellent, x-rays clear, urinalysis good, etc....absolutely nothing else wrong with him.
When we know what the problem is and we can't treat it, it's extremely difficult but when no one knows what's wrong, it's a hair-pulling fest. We saw another vet (I liked the vet that treated him but didn't love them) and the other vet found nothing definite, but was able to help us keep him happy until he died a few months later...still no diagnosis. Drives us nuts and is haunting.
Nothing is worse than that constant, nagging feeling deep in the pit of your gut that something is going on and why the hell can't anyone figure out what is wrong so it can be helped? It's like you're in a constant state of minor anxiety and you aren't sleeping right and aren't eating right and the majority of your life is spent behind Google because you think you might find SOME article or site out there that will give you a lead...and it doesn't. And you feel really, really defeated.
For the poster that began this thread, it's too soon now, but in 6 months to a years time or so you'll look back on all you did. The pain will have dulled enough for you to look at the situation objectively and you'll see all you did and will feel good about that part. You'll still miss him, but as I tell others here...give yourself some credit for what you did.
Hang in there, man. We're here for you.
 
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