It's been a few days now and I can type or speak a few lines about this without crying now.
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who posted. I only found this site last week while I was trying to research how to help my Fluff. I was surprised and warmed by the number of thoughtful, helpful and supportive responses I got. Although in the end things didn't work out, it warmed my heart to think of all the caring notes of condolences I received. They were also a big help in my guilt that I made the right choice at the right time. I've never had to make a choice like that, and I think without such support I would continued second guessing myself for some time.
I will try to visit the boards as often as I can and try to be of help to others as you all were to me. It did make me cry several times to read such involved and caring responses from people I've never met. That kind of humanity always brings a happy cry to my eyes. When my husband and I lost a family member on 9/11, we went to PA with the rest of the families to attend a memorial and see the crash site. I was able to keep my cool through most of the event, but as the buses were leaving the hotel's parking lot a security guard was standing at the back of the lot and saluted each of the 5 buses as they went past. That is when I lost control. I am always so touched by the kindness and concern of strangers and those of you who posted for me showed me the same kindness and for that I will always be thankful.
I do have one last favor to ask your advice. While initial grief made me say I would not get another cat, I'm beginning to feel differently. I am also beginning to see our Tabby (6 years-old) looking concerned. He still eats and gets around fine, but Fluff had been his companion from the beginning of his life. I also find it difficult to sleep at night without the sound of purring and the feel of fluff on my head. (It's strange the things you get used to) I've lost my napping partner and feline conversationalist. We could have long conversations of her meowing and my meowing back. While our tabby (Devo) is a nice cat, he is of the aloof variety. Not that this is a problem, he is more my husband's cat and it works well for them. I was considering adopting an adult cat for 2 reasons. 1. So many adult cats need homes 2. I believe an adult catâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s personality is mostly formed. If he/she likes being held as an adult, unless something traumatic happens, that behavior is not likely to change, etc. I know I can never replace my Fluff, but I think I can honor her by saving another cat and caring for it the way I did for her. I found her in a dumpster.
So, Long story short, too late...My questions are how long should someone wait to get a new cat, or should I just jump right in and start the search? Also, what is thought about getting an adult cat instead of a kitten? Lastly, (I promise) my husband and I are going to Australia for most of January. We had planed that my brother would watch the dog and my mother the (at the time this was discussed) cats. I hesitate to get a cat before we go away, but I worry that after losing his mother/sister, Devo will not react well to being separated from his brother/playmate the dog. Part of me thinks if we got a cat soon, Devon would do better when we go away.
Please let me know what you think and thanks again for everything, it is still hard but it gets a little easier every day.
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who posted. I only found this site last week while I was trying to research how to help my Fluff. I was surprised and warmed by the number of thoughtful, helpful and supportive responses I got. Although in the end things didn't work out, it warmed my heart to think of all the caring notes of condolences I received. They were also a big help in my guilt that I made the right choice at the right time. I've never had to make a choice like that, and I think without such support I would continued second guessing myself for some time.
I will try to visit the boards as often as I can and try to be of help to others as you all were to me. It did make me cry several times to read such involved and caring responses from people I've never met. That kind of humanity always brings a happy cry to my eyes. When my husband and I lost a family member on 9/11, we went to PA with the rest of the families to attend a memorial and see the crash site. I was able to keep my cool through most of the event, but as the buses were leaving the hotel's parking lot a security guard was standing at the back of the lot and saluted each of the 5 buses as they went past. That is when I lost control. I am always so touched by the kindness and concern of strangers and those of you who posted for me showed me the same kindness and for that I will always be thankful.
I do have one last favor to ask your advice. While initial grief made me say I would not get another cat, I'm beginning to feel differently. I am also beginning to see our Tabby (6 years-old) looking concerned. He still eats and gets around fine, but Fluff had been his companion from the beginning of his life. I also find it difficult to sleep at night without the sound of purring and the feel of fluff on my head. (It's strange the things you get used to) I've lost my napping partner and feline conversationalist. We could have long conversations of her meowing and my meowing back. While our tabby (Devo) is a nice cat, he is of the aloof variety. Not that this is a problem, he is more my husband's cat and it works well for them. I was considering adopting an adult cat for 2 reasons. 1. So many adult cats need homes 2. I believe an adult catâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s personality is mostly formed. If he/she likes being held as an adult, unless something traumatic happens, that behavior is not likely to change, etc. I know I can never replace my Fluff, but I think I can honor her by saving another cat and caring for it the way I did for her. I found her in a dumpster.
So, Long story short, too late...My questions are how long should someone wait to get a new cat, or should I just jump right in and start the search? Also, what is thought about getting an adult cat instead of a kitten? Lastly, (I promise) my husband and I are going to Australia for most of January. We had planed that my brother would watch the dog and my mother the (at the time this was discussed) cats. I hesitate to get a cat before we go away, but I worry that after losing his mother/sister, Devo will not react well to being separated from his brother/playmate the dog. Part of me thinks if we got a cat soon, Devon would do better when we go away.
Please let me know what you think and thanks again for everything, it is still hard but it gets a little easier every day.