Overwhelmed with New Cat

[AyaB]

Hi everyone. I'm new to this site, so apologies if I posted this in the wrong section. I'm really in need of some advice. A couple of months ago I adopted a cat from a shelter. I struggle with anxiety and am living by myself, so I thought it would be a good idea to get a cat. I grew up with cats and always enjoyed their company and was familiar with what their basic needs required. So I really didn't think it to be a problem.

The day after I brought my cat home, I noticed he had an ear infection. So since then, I've been taking him to the vet every other week, cleaning his ears and the apartment everyday while working full-time and taking online classes while trying to maintain self care as well.

My cat is a Ragdoll. He's a sweetheart, but I never anticipated how much time he would demand from me. Along with his ear treatments, he wants to be in my lap all the time, which simply can't happen since I'm busy all day working. I've allowed him to sit on the desk while I work, but one day he accidentally knocked something off, so he shys from doing that now. Everyday he begs for attention and while I'm working or taking a test online, it is very distracting and makes me take more time to complete what I'm doing. He has a cat tree, which he doesn't use much, he has toys and treats. I take breaks to stretch or to play with him. I also try to reserve time before bed to give him some quality time, but it doesn't seem enough for him. And because of his ear infection I don't allow him to sleep with me.

So, I've been debating if this was a good idea. Maybe I'm not the best caregiver for him. I love Pyo, but my stress has gone up immensely since I've adopted him. I know he's bored but it's just me and him. And I'm not allowed to have more than one cat in my apartment. So now I feel very torn between keeping him and finding a new home for him which has another cat and more people, and may be more suitable for him. But I also feel so bad for it. At this point I feel so very tired with everything.

 

[VoidIndigo]

I want to follow this, because I'm very much in the same situation. I feel for you, you're not alone!

I live alone too, and I have my own anxiety issues. I adopted Milo because I too had had cats my whole life growing up and longed for a companion. I didn't realize when I brought him him he would have UTI issues, and the first couple months were wonderful. But the last two weeks have literally been hell. Back and forth to the vet / ER, 1000's of $$$ in treatments, constant watching and vet calls, meds every 6 - 12 hours, and constant worry. Fortunately I work from home, otherwise I have no idea how this could be done.

I too am struggling with the thought that I might not be the right person for my little one. I love him, believe me, and it's tearing me up. But this is "not what I signed up for" as they say... it's a stress level I could not have imagined.

So, I wish I had something to offer you besides camaraderie, but I CAN say that you're not alone in your struggle. And that may not seem like much... but in a way, I'm relieved to know that I'm not alone in mine. So I hope that helps you a little <3

 

[AyaB]

I want to follow this, because I'm very much in the same situation. I feel for you, you're not alone!

I live alone too, and I have my own anxiety issues. I adopted Milo because I too had had cats my whole life growing up and longed for a companion. I didn't realize when I brought him him he would have UTI issues, and the first couple months were wonderful. But the last two weeks have literally been hell. Back and forth to the vet / ER, 1000's of $$$ in treatments, constant watching and vet calls, meds every 6 - 12 hours, and constant worry. Fortunately I work from home, otherwise I have no idea how this could be done.

I too am struggling with the thought that I might not be the right person for my little one. I love him, believe me, and it's tearing me up. But this is "not what I signed up for" as they say... it's a stress level I could not have imagined.

So, I wish I had something to offer you besides camaraderie, but I CAN say that you're not alone in your struggle. And that may not seem like much... but in a way, I'm relieved to know that I'm not alone in mine. So I hope that helps you a little <3

Thanks so much for you comment. Knowing that I'm not the only one feeling this way helps so much! Right who would have guessed that from the get-go you'd be paying so much (aside from the usual necessities).

I feel so guilty since he's a sweet cat and I don't like seeing him in pain. I keep thinking to wait it out and see how I feel after everything, but as time goes on, he seems even more bored, then I become even more stressed because I want him to be happy and to enjoy his new home and I'm STILL doing these ear treatments which we BOTH are totally over.

Is that Milo in your profile picture? He's so cute! His white patch looks like a heart!

 

[VoidIndigo]

Thanks so much for you comment. Knowing that I'm not the only one feeling this way helps so much! Right who would have guessed that from the get-go you'd be paying so much (aside from the usual necessities).

I feel so guilty since he's a sweet cat and I don't like seeing him in pain. I keep thinking to wait it out and see how I feel after everything, but as time goes on, he seems even more bored, then I become even more stressed because I want him to be happy and to enjoy his new home and I'm STILL doing these ear treatments which we BOTH are totally over.

Is that Milo in your profile picture? He's so cute! His white patch looks like a heart!

Yup that's him He's so amazingly patient, in spite of the meds and the poking and prodding, he's still the most wonderful little thing. He's about 2 and a half... I can't imagine going through what he's going through, without really understanding it...

Oh, he's like your cat: constantly bored. I've tried toys and climbing structures and such... no interest. And with the meds he's on now, and the poking and prodding... he's not interested in anything. That's really hard too, because I want him to be happy and fulfilled, but you can't force someone to be happy

I did get the vet to order me compounded meds, so they're in liquid form and I don't have to force pills down his throat... I couldn't imagine doing that for years on end (although I know people that have). That was enough stress for both of us. Part of this problem is, stress makes it worse...

Anyway, I'm hoping we can reach some kind of balance soon and things will settle out. Hopefully they will for you too. I know can't live with the stress of constant vigilance forever... and if my company recalls us back to the office after the lockdown finally relaxes, I don't know how I will deal with this.

You should post up a picture in the picture area, BTW

 

[AyaB]

Thanks. Same all around.
I posted a picture of my big boy, Pyo!

 

[nomeowing]

I'm really sorry for what you are going through. I certainly struggle with my own lifelong issues from childhood abuse, so I get it. Does the vet think the ear infection will clear up soon? It sounds like treatment is taking some time. Do you have another room you could close him in if you need to concentrate on something online. Sometimes things take time. Change is very hard for me as well as others.

 

[AyaB]

I'm really sorry for what you are going through. I certainly struggle with my own lifelong issues from childhood abuse, so I get it. Does the vet think the ear infection will clear up soon? It sounds like treatment is taking some time. Do you have another room you could close him in if you need to concentrate on something online. Sometimes things take time. Change is very hard for me as well as others.

Thank you. Yes it's taking a lot more than expected. I'm hoping soon. The vet was hesitant to say exactly since the previous treatment didn't work. For a while I tried doing my class work in my bedroom. It gave me some quiet time, but I really need a second screen for my day job and much of my course work, so I have to work in the living space where Pyo and my desk are.