Today makes one month since you crossed the Rainbow Bridge, and I still cry when I think about the sudden decision I made at the vet office, when they told me you had something incurable, that treatment might or not work... and although you still looked OK, I decided to let you go... I will always wonder if it was the right one or not.
Sadie Blue, a shy orange tabby came to me when she was 5 yrs old. I remember the day I went to the shelter to get another kitty to keep Kia company, and saw all these people looking at the cute kittens, then I noticed this scared small pretty one, hiding in the further corner of her cage, I read the card and I realized she was "an old cat", I moved away to look at one kitten that had caught my attention, but I turned my head and saw Sadie so sad and scared, I decided to take her instead.
I asked a bit about her history and I was told, she had been there a long time (I can not imagine being in that small "cell" so long), that she was brought there because her poop stunk too much, (their words...), she was afraid, shy, didn't want to be held or petted... but had the softest fur I have ever touched, almost like silk.
After a couple days at home, I took her to the vet for a check up, concerned because she was vomiting a lot, almost after every meal. The vet told me nothing was wrong with her, that she was one of these cats that eat too fast and the food comes right back up, gave me a couple ideas of how to try to minimize it.
I will make the next 10 yrs a short summary, countless messes, a husband ready to "kill her" (his words), because the carpets have been all ruined, even with me cleaning immediately, etc.. dealing with a respiratory infection for a whole month that nothing seemed to cure, and the vet and me almost giving up, with a cat that went from 12 to 4 pounds and I thought she would be gone, but she fought and I didn't give up either and she got over. Another year and some digestive problems, trying different foods that at one point caused diarrhea on both cats, for several days... Oh the joy! Now my husband that doesn't like pets, wanted both cats out, more fights.... but all passed and for the last year Sadie was healthy (I thought), gaining weight, playful, loving, fighting with Kia for a spot on my lap, giving me kisses, laying belly up for a rub...
Then all of the sudden I saw her behavior changing, I called the vet the next day and I was told to bring some urine for a test, it came back as an UTI, no big deal just some medicine and she will be fine (I though), but first they wanted to make sure it was nothing more serious, so I took her in for more tests and it was bad news... she had renal failure.
They told me about all the possible help I could give her to go on, but there was not cure.
Unfortunately I knew about all that, as I lost another kitty Abba when she was 8, to the same illness, with her I did everything, the fluids, meds, trips to the vet... and what I accomplished was to make her miserable, just to live 3 more months, hiding from me, not letting me touch her, because she knew what was coming, to force her to take meds, to eat... I said never again, I would not torture other cat to make them live a few more months in fear...
So I said to the vet, I was going to let her go in peace, no waiting to see her suffering, and the vet told me surprisingly that it was a good decision, may be to make me feel better I don't know.
I said goodbye to her, when she looked as usual, that's why it was so hard, I want to convince myself I did the right thing "for her", but I will never be sure.
It took years but Sadie Blue was happy and loved at the end of her days, no matter the messes, the fights with my husband and the money spent. I hope she knew that I never regretted to get the "old cat".
I will miss you my shy little girl.
Sadie Blue, a shy orange tabby came to me when she was 5 yrs old. I remember the day I went to the shelter to get another kitty to keep Kia company, and saw all these people looking at the cute kittens, then I noticed this scared small pretty one, hiding in the further corner of her cage, I read the card and I realized she was "an old cat", I moved away to look at one kitten that had caught my attention, but I turned my head and saw Sadie so sad and scared, I decided to take her instead.
I asked a bit about her history and I was told, she had been there a long time (I can not imagine being in that small "cell" so long), that she was brought there because her poop stunk too much, (their words...), she was afraid, shy, didn't want to be held or petted... but had the softest fur I have ever touched, almost like silk.
After a couple days at home, I took her to the vet for a check up, concerned because she was vomiting a lot, almost after every meal. The vet told me nothing was wrong with her, that she was one of these cats that eat too fast and the food comes right back up, gave me a couple ideas of how to try to minimize it.
I will make the next 10 yrs a short summary, countless messes, a husband ready to "kill her" (his words), because the carpets have been all ruined, even with me cleaning immediately, etc.. dealing with a respiratory infection for a whole month that nothing seemed to cure, and the vet and me almost giving up, with a cat that went from 12 to 4 pounds and I thought she would be gone, but she fought and I didn't give up either and she got over. Another year and some digestive problems, trying different foods that at one point caused diarrhea on both cats, for several days... Oh the joy! Now my husband that doesn't like pets, wanted both cats out, more fights.... but all passed and for the last year Sadie was healthy (I thought), gaining weight, playful, loving, fighting with Kia for a spot on my lap, giving me kisses, laying belly up for a rub...
Then all of the sudden I saw her behavior changing, I called the vet the next day and I was told to bring some urine for a test, it came back as an UTI, no big deal just some medicine and she will be fine (I though), but first they wanted to make sure it was nothing more serious, so I took her in for more tests and it was bad news... she had renal failure.
They told me about all the possible help I could give her to go on, but there was not cure.
Unfortunately I knew about all that, as I lost another kitty Abba when she was 8, to the same illness, with her I did everything, the fluids, meds, trips to the vet... and what I accomplished was to make her miserable, just to live 3 more months, hiding from me, not letting me touch her, because she knew what was coming, to force her to take meds, to eat... I said never again, I would not torture other cat to make them live a few more months in fear...
So I said to the vet, I was going to let her go in peace, no waiting to see her suffering, and the vet told me surprisingly that it was a good decision, may be to make me feel better I don't know.
I said goodbye to her, when she looked as usual, that's why it was so hard, I want to convince myself I did the right thing "for her", but I will never be sure.
It took years but Sadie Blue was happy and loved at the end of her days, no matter the messes, the fights with my husband and the money spent. I hope she knew that I never regretted to get the "old cat".
I will miss you my shy little girl.
