My mom got engaged, but....

[valanhb]

I really understand where you're at. My father remarried last year after Mom's passing in 2000. It was really hard for my sister and me to see him happy with someone other than Mom. While it seemed stupid to say, him moving on put a real finality to Mom's passing. We knew he wasn't replacing her, just moving forward, but it didn't make it any easier for us.

And I have to admit that there are things about her that I don't really like, but the most important thing in my mind is that she makes him happy. She's not Mom, she's not my step-mother either. She is Barb, and that's fine. Dad isn't "Dad" to her grown children either (though he is grandpa to their very small children).

It's been really difficult for me to come to terms with how I feel about the whole situation. It's taken quite a while for me to do so.

Even though it's quite possible to have more than one love of your life, or at least love in your life, you only have 1 mom and 1 dad.

 

[ping]

When my mom got remarried 14 some yrs ago I had a very hard time accepting him. I was 10 at the time and just hated him for the most part. During my teen yrs we got into some dousys. But around the age of 17 when I became pregnant we started to get along better. Now 10 yrs after that we get along so much better. In time I think things will get better.

 

[halfpint]

Well I'm sure you want your Mother to be Happy, When My first DH passed away I figured I would never meet anyone but I did and I got it from all family members what if this and that., I told them My godness if it's a mistake I'll kick myself in the Butt and move on. We have been married 10 years this coming August. And Now everyone gets along OK

He never wanted to be there Step Father thats for sure and anyway my Daughters were all grown so its all ok. You will accept what your Mother chooses and you will be fine I'm sure

 

[larussa]

From your profile I see that you are 29 years old. Why don't you just move out and into your own apartment. Is this at all a possibility, can you support yourself??

 

[catloverin_ks]

Originally Posted by LaRussa

From your profile I see that you are 29 years old. Why don't you just move out and into your own apartment. Is this at all a possibility, can you support yourself??

Umm sweetie, I am married and have 2 kids....I dont even live at home!!

 

[larussa]

Originally Posted by catloverin_ks

Umm sweetie, I am married and have 2 kids....I dont even live at home!!

OH so sorry, I'm kinda new here and have no idea about most of you. Well then, at least you don't have to live under the same roof but I know you must worry about the siblings that do live with him. Never was in this kind of situation, hope things work out for all of you.

 

[larussa]

Originally Posted by catloverin_ks

I am having a hard time accepting it. I want her to be happy, but.......I just hardl cant stand the guy shes with.

I know my dad would disapprove but I know its her life.

Im just having really mixed emotions right now. Can I have some cheer up vibes or something please??

Thanks guys.

I know you all can do it......cause your all the greatest!!

I am reposting this since my reply to your being married is on the next page, I am sorry, I don't know most of you and it sounded like you still lived at home. Hope all goes well with all of you.

 

[ericanicole]

My mom got remarried when I was 21. but before she married Scott she had been single for 19 years with a handfull of rotten boyfriends in there. some that used her, some that cheated, some that abused. It wasnt till Scott that i was finally at ease with her in a relationship.
Its hard because we are so protective of our parents, more than they will ever know. how long has your mom been with this fella?
maybe theres a way for your family to spend time with him...maybe he just has a weird exterrior.

One of the most important things I did when my mom married scott was think to myself "is he going to take care of her if she gets sick (she has type one diabetes) or goes blind?" "does he love her for who she is and her faults?" "does he love our family?" and then I was totally ok with it. its NEVER easy when a parent remarries.

 

[catloverin_ks]

Originally Posted by EricaNicole

My mom got remarried when I was 21. but before she married Scott she had been single for 19 years with a handfull of rotten boyfriends in there. some that used her, some that cheated, some that abused. It wasnt till Scott that i was finally at ease with her in a relationship.
Its hard because we are so protective of our parents, more than they will ever know. how long has your mom been with this fella?
maybe theres a way for your family to spend time with him...maybe he just has a weird exterrior.

One of the most important things I did when my mom married scott was think to myself "is he going to take care of her if she gets sick (she has type one diabetes) or goes blind?" "does he love her for who she is and her faults?" "does he love our family?" and then I was totally ok with it. its NEVER easy when a parent remarries.

Lemme think, they been together like 2 1/2 yrs

He doesnt beat her or anything but its just his :censor::censor::censor::censor::censor::censor::censor: attitude!!

One thing that REALLY pi**es me off is hes on more than one occasion, said some really RUDE things to MY son! And he also likes to bit** when my mom babysits for me(like its his business) This guy is just a jerk and I cant help it I feel this way

Trust me, all of us kids feel this way!

 

[karmasmom]

Originally Posted by catloverin_ks

I forgot to mention something(s).......she broke it off with this guy a few weeks ago because she felt like they werent going anywhere(she just wanted some sort of "commitment') and he told her that as long as she had his *word* she didnt need a RING!! So hes buying her back IMO. I mean why else would he suddenly just change his mind??

Some guys just need the fear of losing the one they love before they will commit. Its rotton but true. Alot of guys have a fear to commit but when faced with the idea of never haveing that person in their life they suddenly change. It does not mean he doesnt love her or is buying her back it may mean he realized he can't live without her.