My heart is broken...

[ilovemia]

Mac just went to his new forever home. I was told by my apt manager that I needed to find a  new home for one of my cats or I had to move. I saved Mac 6 months ago from a horrible situation. I knew I was only allowed one cat but He needed me and I couldnt not help him. I had him nuetered, he has all his shots so I know I gave him a good start. I was careful about who took him. Asked lots of questions got her vets name and checked him out, and charged a fee so I knew she wasnt just getting a "free"cat. She also knows to call if she has any questions or it doesnt work out. She spent about an hour here playing with him before taking him. I sent her with the blanket he sleeps on and his play center he scrtches on and food to start out (which she said she was going to buy him so he doesnt have to many changes at once),

Everything is as good as it can get for Mac but I miss him terribly and he has only been gone an hour. Moving was not an option for me as I live in subsidized housing. Mia wont leave my side and is looking for him. I'm worried she will get depressed. Has anyone ever had to deal with something like this with their cat. How did you handle the one left behind. How did you make it better for her. Mia was always an only cat until 6 months ago. I'm just worried she wont adjust well going back to being a single cat. 

 

[blueyedgirl5946]

Oh my, ;I am so sorry this has happened to you. You did everything you could to help Mac, even giving a home when you knew you were not supposed to. Cats do take a while to adjust when they lose a companion and they might be depressed acting for awhile. I saw this in my cats when one passed on from this world and left a companion here. But they do eventually adjust. Just show Mia all the attention she wants, or give her space. You will know which she needs. In time she will adjust, probably better than you. You are going to always miss Mac, but I hope you will comfort yourself in the fact that Mac was given a wonderful start by you and now has a loving home.

 

[ilovemia]

Thankyou, blueyedgirl for your encouragement. Mia and I got through the night (although we have been up sence 3am). She wont leave my side but for bits at a time to look for Mac. She and I have played alot together this morning and I moved the table and chairs next to the window so she could look out. I couldnt have it there before as I didnt want the building managers to see Mac too. Shes enjoying watching people come and go and cars driving by. She hasnt sat in the window for 6 months now. She has also started playing with her favorit cloth ball a little while ago. I know it will be rough off and on for awhile while she gets used to being an only cat again but if there are any ideas anyone has to help her get through this I will try almost anything to make her happy.

I gave her a half can of Friskies last night as a treat to try to settle her some. She usually eats dry as thats what I can afford. I just got my check yesterday for the month so I have to do some magor shopping today. I will be going to the city today so I will be able to go to Pet Supplies Plus and Petco.I'm going to check out some canned food prices as I might be able to give her more along with dry as I will have half a food bill now (Mac was already 10lbs at 7 1/2 month and hes not fat). She likes the Friskies but my does she ever have terrible gas from it. She can clear the apartment, not just a room. lol

 

[Willowy]

Sorry you had to find him a new home . It sounds like it should work out for him but it's sad for you.

I know it's too late now. . .but I think people need to be aware of their rights and not let landlords get away with wrong behavior---did your manager ever tell you it was OK to have 2 cats, and what does your lease say? If a manager ever tells you it's OK they aren't allowed to change their mind. HUD has very specific rules about these sorts of things.

 

[ilovemia]

Technically there are to be no animals in the apartment building I live in (subsidized, gov. housing. However I had a prescription from my dr. for Mia so they had to allow her. They have known about Mac for about 3 months and had told me he had to leave as I could only have one. Housing is being inspected by higher ups the end of the month so they told me again, only this time they told me I would have to move if I did not find one of them a new home.Mia is 1 1/2 and I have had her sence she was 7 weeks old.I've had her the longest and she is also not good with change or anyone else but me. Mac is 7 1/2 months. I've had him sence he was 6 weeks old. He loves everyone and is a very social cat. I know he would adjust easier as he is not so set in his ways and Mia was here with me first. I miss him terribly but I do know he has a good home. Still hurts though.   

 

[Willowy]

Aww, too bad your doctor couldn't add him in. They have to allow Support animals.

 

[catlover73]

I am sorry this happened to you.  I know it was hard to re-home Mac but you did an excellent job taking care of him and helping him find a new home.  I really think Mia will adjust to this change in time.  You are doing the right thing by giving her extra attention.  Perhaps you could try distracting her with play when she starts meowing for Mac. This may sound silly to some people but have you tried talking to her and explaining what happened.  It may seem like she would not understand you but it may help her.

I used pet sit for a friend a lot and one of her cats passed away suddenly while he was asleep. She had to go out of town for work a few days later.  When I would go over to visit Neo he was walking around meowing for his buddy.  Neo liked to be brushed and I would use that to distract him when he would start searching.  He jumped in my lap after a brushing session and started crying. I sat there and petted him for a while and told him I was sorry that his buddy was gone and would not be coming home.  He cuddled with me while meowing and I cried for his friend.  After that the searching and meowing slowly began to lessen.  I let his mommy know what I had been doing with him when she came home on the weekend.  She also sat down and had a talk with him and continued to use brushing him as a distraction.  I think it took about 2 weeks for him to stop looking for his buddy.  Neo was not really a playful cat so using toys as a distraction would not work for him.

In 2003 one of my cats passed away at the vets during treatment for an illness.  Claude and Tegato were very bonded with Baby T.  She was a 2nd mother to them when they were babies.  She had been in their lives since their birth in 1995.  When I took her to the vet I was expecting her to come home.  The vets office thought they would be able to treat her and send her back home.  The vet was in tears when she called to tell us our baby had passed away.  Tegato who was usually a really quiet cat started running around meowing and looking for her.  He would wake me up walking around crying. Claude walked around looking for her but was not vocal.  I got a wand toy and used it to distract Tegato when he would start crying.  Claude would come join the play session.  After about a week the crying and searching stopped.  The funny thing is Tegato was never a vocal cat before this and he still talks to us to this day.  He will meow at me when he wants attention or decides it is time for us to go to bed,

Even if you did have another baby Mia would most likely still be trying to find her buddy.  You are handling this situation very well so please just give yourself and Mia time,  Even though Mac is still alive Mia may not know that. You did right by Mac by making sure he found a new home.