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- Feb 25, 2015
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My cat, "D", is extremely needy and loves to rub up against me and nibble me any chance he can get. The nibbling seems to be compulsive and constantly makes me tense and very uncomfortable. It's bad enough that he'll obsessively try to do it while I pet him or if we're sitting together, making cuddling an unpleasant if not impossible experience, but what's really getting to me is his behavior in the kitchen.
When I'm in the kitchen, he circles my feet like a little piranha. He knows I don't like it when he nibbles me. He reads my body language and is constantly trying to find the right moment to nibble. He rubs up against my leg, over and over again, and if I'm looking down or out of the corner of my eye, if I am hyper aware of him, if I am very tense, or if I do so little as motion a pinkie towards the spray bottle, he will just continue to rub up against me and keep turning his head away, doing his best not to nibble me. He'll start to turn his head to start nibbling, but will catch himself if he feels like I am aware of him somehow.
But the moment I become a little less tense, start focusing more on completing my task, etc, that's his opportunity to go in the for the nibble. It seems to be a very calculated process. He'll start sniffing, slowly turning his head in, waiting for the exact moment he feel like he can get away with it. He'll sniff, get close with his mouth, I vaguely move my eyes in his direction, or move my chin like 2cm, he'll back his head away and rub the rest of his body against me, go back in, sniffing, getting closer, until he can finally find the right moment...
Unfortunately, spraying with water isn't very effective with him, neither is stomping my feet or using a loud voice. He doesn't like those things, but usually he acts kind of oblivious and keeps trying to come back anyway. To be fair, I haven't been 100% with the water bottle or stomping in this case, because I don't know how to deal with this situation, which is why I need some advice.
At some point, I decided that he wasn't going to be allowed to rub up against me at all while I'm in the kitchen, because the rubbing and nibbling go hand in hand. I haven't committed to enforcing this because I feel like it's cruel. Like he's just trying to find comfort, and wants to be close to me, and not letting him rub up against me is just taking it too far. But I don't think I have any other choice, if I don't want him to nibble me. He is making me feel uncomfortable living in my own home. I constantly feel tense and hyper vigilant in the kitchen. I just want him to get away from me. Maybe he has anxiety issues, but so do I.
As far as I'm concerned, I don't want him to be within a 5-8 foot radius of me while I'm in the kitchen, unless he's preoccupied with something else or laying down, or really behaving himself. He is so obsessed with this behavior though. I know he'll try to do anything he can to weasel his way closer and closer to me.
The reason I started stomping, is because spraying with a water bottle and saying "no" just isn't enough. If I break him of this habit, it will involve stomping, water bottle, and using a loud voice when he gets close to me in the kitchen. Unfortunately with the water bottle, he won't even notice one spray, I have to spray him a few times. I'm honestly worried even this isn't going to be enough, but I feel as though I don't have a lot of options. I doubt he'll care about having a little bit of bitter stuff on my legs and feet, and besides, I can't have bitter stuff on my pants/socks/legs constantly.
So basically, I'm asking if this seems reasonable or if anyone has any other suggestions. I know this probably all sounds dramatic since it's "just" nibbling, but he's so obsessed with nibbling me that it's extremely uncomfortable and unsettling. I just hate it. This whole process is so exhausting.
I don't want to give him problems by doing this, or make him feel like he can't ever snuggle with me. I do and will continue to give him snuggles. I do give him attention, even though it is a difficult and uncomfortable process, as mentioned. I also ignore him when he's being inappropriately needy. And yes, he is also playing with and is given plenty of toys, and has a kitty friend that he also likes to harass.
Thanks for reading, and for your help.
When I'm in the kitchen, he circles my feet like a little piranha. He knows I don't like it when he nibbles me. He reads my body language and is constantly trying to find the right moment to nibble. He rubs up against my leg, over and over again, and if I'm looking down or out of the corner of my eye, if I am hyper aware of him, if I am very tense, or if I do so little as motion a pinkie towards the spray bottle, he will just continue to rub up against me and keep turning his head away, doing his best not to nibble me. He'll start to turn his head to start nibbling, but will catch himself if he feels like I am aware of him somehow.
But the moment I become a little less tense, start focusing more on completing my task, etc, that's his opportunity to go in the for the nibble. It seems to be a very calculated process. He'll start sniffing, slowly turning his head in, waiting for the exact moment he feel like he can get away with it. He'll sniff, get close with his mouth, I vaguely move my eyes in his direction, or move my chin like 2cm, he'll back his head away and rub the rest of his body against me, go back in, sniffing, getting closer, until he can finally find the right moment...
Unfortunately, spraying with water isn't very effective with him, neither is stomping my feet or using a loud voice. He doesn't like those things, but usually he acts kind of oblivious and keeps trying to come back anyway. To be fair, I haven't been 100% with the water bottle or stomping in this case, because I don't know how to deal with this situation, which is why I need some advice.
At some point, I decided that he wasn't going to be allowed to rub up against me at all while I'm in the kitchen, because the rubbing and nibbling go hand in hand. I haven't committed to enforcing this because I feel like it's cruel. Like he's just trying to find comfort, and wants to be close to me, and not letting him rub up against me is just taking it too far. But I don't think I have any other choice, if I don't want him to nibble me. He is making me feel uncomfortable living in my own home. I constantly feel tense and hyper vigilant in the kitchen. I just want him to get away from me. Maybe he has anxiety issues, but so do I.
As far as I'm concerned, I don't want him to be within a 5-8 foot radius of me while I'm in the kitchen, unless he's preoccupied with something else or laying down, or really behaving himself. He is so obsessed with this behavior though. I know he'll try to do anything he can to weasel his way closer and closer to me.
The reason I started stomping, is because spraying with a water bottle and saying "no" just isn't enough. If I break him of this habit, it will involve stomping, water bottle, and using a loud voice when he gets close to me in the kitchen. Unfortunately with the water bottle, he won't even notice one spray, I have to spray him a few times. I'm honestly worried even this isn't going to be enough, but I feel as though I don't have a lot of options. I doubt he'll care about having a little bit of bitter stuff on my legs and feet, and besides, I can't have bitter stuff on my pants/socks/legs constantly.
So basically, I'm asking if this seems reasonable or if anyone has any other suggestions. I know this probably all sounds dramatic since it's "just" nibbling, but he's so obsessed with nibbling me that it's extremely uncomfortable and unsettling. I just hate it. This whole process is so exhausting.
I don't want to give him problems by doing this, or make him feel like he can't ever snuggle with me. I do and will continue to give him snuggles. I do give him attention, even though it is a difficult and uncomfortable process, as mentioned. I also ignore him when he's being inappropriately needy. And yes, he is also playing with and is given plenty of toys, and has a kitty friend that he also likes to harass.
Thanks for reading, and for your help.