Married/Cohabitating couples: How do you split rent?

[rapunzel47]

We contribute equally to a household joint account, from which our rent, utilities, most incidental household expenses and the majority of our food are paid. We each spend out of our own pockets on household stuff from time to time, when it's not worth writing a cheque or using a debit card. That pretty much comes out in the wash, I think. Vehicle expenses come out of our own pockets, i.e. I buy most of the gas, the oil changes, the ongoing stuff, since I do most of the driving; he takes care of the insurance and either covers or contributes to any major repairs.

Other than that, what we earn is our own.

It works for us.

 

[margecat]

Our deal is:

DH pays $1200 out of the montly mortgage payment; I pay the rest (about $400-500 [it changes periodically, as they charge more each month for escrow, about $30; changes usually each year]). He makes about $30,000more a year than I do. I cover the rest of the montlhy bills, except for cable/Internet. I also do most of the savings for our retirement. He pays for most of the food; we split things like vet bills. We split our tax return refund, except for the small State refund; I keep that (I call it my "H& R Blockhead fee, as I do our taxes). However, when our mortgage company recently refunded us for overcharging for escrow (I danged near fainted when I got THAT letter; I was expecting the annual increase for escrow!), I kept the check and the extra $100 per month for 2009, since I always paid the excess escrow charges per month when they went up. (I, of course, being me, put it into my emergency savings!

).

DH has to take me out to dinner every Saturday night, as a thank-you for doing all of the housework annd laundry during the week. Seriously. (It's our "date" time together--we seldom can eat together during the week.) Of course, if he's short on money, etc., I tell him not to. Even I'm not THAT selfish!

When we were living in an apartment (still single most of that 12 month period), we split the rent 50/50. Then again, it was only $768!).

We have separate checking accounts and finances. He tends to bounce checks, and I didn't want the headaches associated with this. Also, this way, we don't have to beg each other when we want to buy something for ourselves. I like being independent with money. If it's a joint purchase, such as home improvements or vet bills, we split it 50/50; but we don't have a general household fund set up (I do always keep a small slush fund for myself for emergencies; he may borrow from that, and pay me back if needed, though he rarely does.)

 

[gailc]

I can't believe no one follows Suzie Orman's great advice. When BF/GF make anything but the exact same amount the bills should be proportioned out according to income.

IE: You make $1000 he makes $3000. Your rent is $1000/month. You pay 25% OR $250; he pays 75% or $750. All your other joint bills-water/utility etc should be paid using the same proportion.

You will be paying your fair share determined by your individual incomes.

Go to a bookstore and take a peek at one of her many books and she will have this written in one (or more) of them.

 

[menagerie mama]

We both pay the bills, split 50/50. He does make more money, but it's cheaper than living on my own!

We have separate accounts, and he only has a savings account. He gives me his half in cash, I deposit it and write out and send the bills.

 

[Ms. Freya]

Originally Posted by GailC

I can't believe no one follows Suzie Orman's great advice. When BF/GF make anything but the exact same amount the bills should be proportioned out according to income.

Actually this is what we do seeing as who makes more has changed so many times since we've been together. I organize everything, though. DH is horrible at remembering bills and admits it, so I sit down once a month and hand him his portion of the bills, which he pays then and there.

Right now I'm paying the utilities and 2/3 of the mortgage, but that's because up until the beginning on November, I made about 4 times what he did. We'll have to look at it again once his pay is settled in the new job.

Honestly, costs as per income has always worked really well for us.

 

[zissou'smom]

Originally Posted by GailC

IE: You make $1000 he makes $3000. Your rent is $1000/month. You pay 25% OR $250; he pays 75% or $750. All your other joint bills-water/utility etc should be paid using the same proportion.

I'm really bad at math, but is that right? Should it be 1/3 and 2/3?

I was trying to figure out a proportion of our incomes that when added together would about equal the cost of rent, and came up with ~35%. 1/3 of the rent is 50$ more than 35% of my income. Oh gosh I believe I've scrambled my brain. I guess it's pishposh.

I was also thinking that if this works (me not paying the rent at all) I will save up so I can pay all of it this summer, when he isn't getting his stipend. That might be better, and would end up being somewhat equivalent to paying some income-dependent proportion.

 

[cococat]

It is our money, regardless of who makes what. We share everything. This works for us, we don't have to worry about each other not being fair with spending money, we have a lot of trust and are very much together on any big financial decisions.

 

[goldenkitty45]

Its not his/her money - its our money. We have a budget plan. Savings and church are taken off the top, then we pay bills, last is left over for miscellaneous. But we have a budget paper that we can list what money is spent.

It doesn't matter to us who pays for what as long as everything gets paid. We are married. Those living together may not view it the same way.

 

[sarahp]

Originally Posted by Zissou'sMom

I have no problem paying what is fair, and neither does he, but I want to do this the right way. Before now, I had more money and I was happy to pay more, but I don't want him to start being resentful (and I don't think HE will, but I think I might if the shoes were switched, but then he's a better person than me

)

I think what you're doing is fair. When DH and I were dating, we moved cities and he wanted a fancy apartment that I couldn't afford. I was trying t pay half, but like you it meant I was constantly broke and couldn't afford what I needed.

We ended up changing how it was proportioned which made it better. If we wanted to live at my income level then we wouldn't have lived where and how he wanted. I think you need to need to pay bills by how much you make, otherwise the one making less money will never get a chance to get ahead.

Once we got married we got joint accounts, there was no more yours and mine. We have a savings account that DHs pay goes into, we pay a certain amount into a checking amount for day to day expenses, and all bills go onto the credit card which we pay each month. It works for us. I'm not working, so DH supports me, which I'm still not totally comfortable with, but I'm getting an education with the plan for me to be the breadwinner down the track, and he be a stay at home dad.

 

[trouts mom]

I think it should be proportionate to the incomes. For instance, I am working full time, but Josh is a student and works part time. So, I will contribute 70% of the expenses, and he will contribute 30%. (Or whatever percentages work for you). It can't be split evenly if the incomes are different.

 

[babyharley]

We make about the same amount, so we split everything 50/50, it works well enough for us

 

[emrldsky]

My husband and I lived separately before we got married, so we had our own expenses, etc. Right before we got married (like, a month before) we got a joint checking account, and started putting all our money in there. We give ourselves (each) $150/month to do what we want with, and the rest goes into various budgets. It's not my money anymore than it's his now, even though he makes more than I do.

We've got quite a bit in savings, and quite a bit more in a money market account (which isn't losing money, but isn't making much either). We've also started our retirement savings, and we're in our mid-20s.

This is the arrangement that works for US. It might not work for everyone, but we don't argue about money. We budget for upcoming things, and we don't have to ask the other if we spend out of our $150/month.

No matter that you do decide, it should be what YOU and your SO feel comfortable with. Good luck!!!

 

[littleraven7726]

Before we were married we started using an account as a "joint" account for ease of paying bills (my honey didn't always pay things on time if he did the bills). Right after we got married, we made it an official joint account. All the money goes into that account, and all the bills get paid out of it. If we split 50/50 I'd have nothing since I am not working right now--full time student again. When we first were living together I was full time at a 4 yr school and working part time, where he was working full time and being paid well. So it was more of a 60/40 arrangement on rent and stuff. It's never really been "his" or "my" money since we got married, just "ours".

 

[whiteforest]

My fiance and I are living on student loans right now, so we alternate months making things split about 50/50. When we were working we each contributed an equal percentage. Say 60% of our income. Let's say he was making $2000 monthly, and I was making $1500 monthly. He would contribute $1200 and I would contribute $900 every month. After we're married and finished with school everything will be combined regardless of our individual incomes.

 

[katiemae1277]

I'm not co-habitating right now, but when I was, my ex and I put everything into one account. I was in charge of paying the bills and we each got an allowance for the month. By pooling our money I was able to pay off about $7500 in credit card debt in 2 years. I really feel that this is the easiest way to manage household finances, no % this, % that. No large purchases made without consulting each other, etc.

 

[twstychik]

If your keeping separate accounts I think the proportional method is a good one. That said, as long as you both agree and are comfortable with the arrangement then that's fine. DH and I happen to make about the exact same ammount so we split our rent (with a $5 difference) down the middle. He pays the cable/internet and I pay the ellectric. Yes, the electric is MUCH cheaper than the cable bill but I don't care about cable and if he wanted to, he could have his business pay this bill so that was our agreement.