I am absolutely devastated right now. It's hard to even be home because I see Lucy EVERYWHERE. For 17 years, that cat has been with us. She was dx with oral cancer in January, but believe she had it before that (symptoms started in October)...and it's been a very rough 5 months. Tuesday, something happened. She was on me in bed and I had to get up for something so I moved her off of me (she was stubborn and if she didn't want to get down, she wouldn't). She then jumped to the floor and started to walk towards the kitchen...but her walk was very weak and she was a bit bow legged. She also fell at one point. It was ODD, but I knew something was very wrong. We took her to the ER vet but they were worthless. In hindsight, we should be taken her to Michigan State Univ instead. They know what's wrong within the first 10 minutes of meeting your pet. We suspect a stroke of some type but from that night, she ate less and eventually would not eat. She started having a rusty-brown strange discharge from her eyes (a vet tech thought it could be pressure from her tumor). She would get up to get some water and use the litter box and that was all. She slept on me all night as usual, but she just wasn't Lucy, anymore. Cancer won. I held her in my arms while the vet administered the med this afternoon. It was odd. This cat was so limp and lifeless even after just the sedative. It broke my heart into a gazillion pieces. And not even a couple of seconds later, she was gone. A big weight was off my shoulders but it went straight to my heart. I see Lucy everywhere and it's very surreal. Not sure how long I'll be a mess, but I'm going to bet it will be quite awhile. My nighttime routine has been interrupted. My morning routine has been interrupted....my life just got overturned. I have no idea how to do this (never mind I went through it once before...). My 17yo son took this of Lu on Wednesday. She absolutely loved to be outside soaking up the sun. How does everyone get through this?! I'm 51yo and I feel like I'm reacting like a 3yo