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- Jul 7, 2020
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Hello everyone,
I'm new to the community but have been feeling concerned and ineffective and I would deeply appreciate any support or advice anyone might be able to offer.
I [28F] recently moved out to the country, and a new friend of mine invited me to a "local animals" facebook group. A week and a half ago, a gal posted that there were some feral kittens on her neighbors property that he was planning to shoot, and said she was going to trap them. She couldn't keep them or afford the fee to take them anywhere because she didn't have any money at all to spare, so she wanted to see if anyone would be willing to socialize them.
I'd never interacted with a feral cat before. I had one cat from when I was 6 until he passed when I was 26, and he was the friendliest being in the world. I was too heartbroken to get another after he died. But I love cats. So I told her I would take them. I did some research first, and saw it would take (give or take) around 4-6 weeks to socialize them. I figured I could do that, and then find good homes for them. They were about 7 weeks old when she trapped them. So it's been a week and a half since then, and I've seen some progress but I'm worried it's not enough.
About the cats: the runt is Fish, a little grey girl. Next smallest is a calico girl, Princess. Then there's a grey and white boy, Bug. And the biggest and most aggressive by far is a calico boy who we call Little Bear (aka Bob the Biter).
I set up a 4x4 dog pen in the living room for them, and zip tied an industrial black plastic bag across the top so they can't get out unless given permission. I cover the bottom of the pen with two soft blankets. They have their water, dry food, wet food in the morning, scratching post, plenty of toys, and their kitty bed which they all snuggle in. For the first week they were here, I let them have one of those cat beds that's like a sphere with a hole for a door, so that they wouldn't feel anxious about being seen constantly. The first two days they wouldn't come out of it and didn't sleep, they just stared at the doorway to their bed and lost it if anyone came too close. After two days, they would slowly start to try venturing out of the bed, but if you moved a muscle they'd run right back in and hide. After a week, they actually started playing in their pen, but only at night, and only if noone moved or made a sound for at least 5 minutes. Now, they've made a lot of progress with their environment. I let them out for a few hours at a time (I can close the door to the bedroom and bathroom, and there's not really anywhere for them to get lost). Right now, I'm sitting on the floor in the living room typing this, and they're running around at the speed of light jumping on each other and being kittens. The littlest one, Fish, actually was chasing her brother and somehow landed on my keyboard, and then stood there looking at me for a minute and hissed and jumped back off and started chasing again (lol) (I had to delete her addition to this post)
The problem though, is that they still HATE being picked up, or even reached towards. Fish will hiss at you if you reach for her or pick her up, but she'll let you. The other girl, Princess, will run and hiss a little bit, but she won't attack you. The boys, though. The second you even look like you might -think- about reaching for one of them, they do this thing where they kind of explode like a violent popcorn kernel and make a horrible noise while lashing in your direction with their claws (sharp, lol). They'll continue to do this if you don't immediately move back, and will start growling at you. None of them have bitten me (yet), because once they start growling I don't push them.
Weirdly enough, once you pick them up they're pretty ok. They'll sit on you and let you pet their heads. They''ll still occasionally look at you and hiss but they won't try to run (unless you've just been holding them a while and they're bored). Little Bear (the big boy) one time attacked my face while I was holding him and drew blood, but he's the only one.
I feel horrible because I know they've come a long way but they're still -so- adverse to being reached towards. And I'm sure it's because I'm big and feel like a predator even though I'm as gentle with them (voice and touch) as I can possibly be. I'm just really afraid that I'm going to fail at this because of my ego in thinking "how hard could it be" and that I won't be able to get them to trust people and find them good homes. I know the three smaller ones will be a ton of work but I think they'll get there, but the big boy almost seems to be getting worse with time.
When they first got here, he hissed but he let me hold him and he even fell asleep on me, and now he's like a little demon baby who hates me. I've never raised my voice, never grabbed them quickly or physically forced them to stay still (like to hold them or something). When I go to pick them up I always get down on the ground so I'm not looming above them, and I reach towards them very slowly (with my cowhide gloves on) and say softly "look at me, look at me" to get their attention, because they'll get nervous if they look at the glove and seem better when they look me in the eye. I clean their cage very thoroughly and change their bedding/litter/water dish/food daily. I hold them all every day. I'm trying really hard. I don't understand why the big boy is so afraid of me and what I'm doing wrong. I really don't want to fail them. I love these little guys. I know it's still pretty early on but like I said I feel like he is actually getting worse. Someone suggested hand feeding him treats but he literally won't even eat a treat if I'm holding him, he'll pretend it's not there or hiss at me, and I have to wrap him all the way to his neck in a little blanket so he doesn't try to scratch my face, which he only started doing a few days ago.
I'm just wondering if anyone has any suggestions or advice. Feeling kind of sad and like I'm letting them down. If I could go back a week and a half ago I would still take them in a second, but I'd have tried to mentally prepare more for how difficult this would be (lol)
Thank you all very, very much. I really appreciate your time and I'm sorry for the long and unedited post (I'm just really exhausted)
Cheers!
-angry_cat_mom
I'm new to the community but have been feeling concerned and ineffective and I would deeply appreciate any support or advice anyone might be able to offer.
I [28F] recently moved out to the country, and a new friend of mine invited me to a "local animals" facebook group. A week and a half ago, a gal posted that there were some feral kittens on her neighbors property that he was planning to shoot, and said she was going to trap them. She couldn't keep them or afford the fee to take them anywhere because she didn't have any money at all to spare, so she wanted to see if anyone would be willing to socialize them.
I'd never interacted with a feral cat before. I had one cat from when I was 6 until he passed when I was 26, and he was the friendliest being in the world. I was too heartbroken to get another after he died. But I love cats. So I told her I would take them. I did some research first, and saw it would take (give or take) around 4-6 weeks to socialize them. I figured I could do that, and then find good homes for them. They were about 7 weeks old when she trapped them. So it's been a week and a half since then, and I've seen some progress but I'm worried it's not enough.
About the cats: the runt is Fish, a little grey girl. Next smallest is a calico girl, Princess. Then there's a grey and white boy, Bug. And the biggest and most aggressive by far is a calico boy who we call Little Bear (aka Bob the Biter).
I set up a 4x4 dog pen in the living room for them, and zip tied an industrial black plastic bag across the top so they can't get out unless given permission. I cover the bottom of the pen with two soft blankets. They have their water, dry food, wet food in the morning, scratching post, plenty of toys, and their kitty bed which they all snuggle in. For the first week they were here, I let them have one of those cat beds that's like a sphere with a hole for a door, so that they wouldn't feel anxious about being seen constantly. The first two days they wouldn't come out of it and didn't sleep, they just stared at the doorway to their bed and lost it if anyone came too close. After two days, they would slowly start to try venturing out of the bed, but if you moved a muscle they'd run right back in and hide. After a week, they actually started playing in their pen, but only at night, and only if noone moved or made a sound for at least 5 minutes. Now, they've made a lot of progress with their environment. I let them out for a few hours at a time (I can close the door to the bedroom and bathroom, and there's not really anywhere for them to get lost). Right now, I'm sitting on the floor in the living room typing this, and they're running around at the speed of light jumping on each other and being kittens. The littlest one, Fish, actually was chasing her brother and somehow landed on my keyboard, and then stood there looking at me for a minute and hissed and jumped back off and started chasing again (lol) (I had to delete her addition to this post)
The problem though, is that they still HATE being picked up, or even reached towards. Fish will hiss at you if you reach for her or pick her up, but she'll let you. The other girl, Princess, will run and hiss a little bit, but she won't attack you. The boys, though. The second you even look like you might -think- about reaching for one of them, they do this thing where they kind of explode like a violent popcorn kernel and make a horrible noise while lashing in your direction with their claws (sharp, lol). They'll continue to do this if you don't immediately move back, and will start growling at you. None of them have bitten me (yet), because once they start growling I don't push them.
Weirdly enough, once you pick them up they're pretty ok. They'll sit on you and let you pet their heads. They''ll still occasionally look at you and hiss but they won't try to run (unless you've just been holding them a while and they're bored). Little Bear (the big boy) one time attacked my face while I was holding him and drew blood, but he's the only one.
I feel horrible because I know they've come a long way but they're still -so- adverse to being reached towards. And I'm sure it's because I'm big and feel like a predator even though I'm as gentle with them (voice and touch) as I can possibly be. I'm just really afraid that I'm going to fail at this because of my ego in thinking "how hard could it be" and that I won't be able to get them to trust people and find them good homes. I know the three smaller ones will be a ton of work but I think they'll get there, but the big boy almost seems to be getting worse with time.
When they first got here, he hissed but he let me hold him and he even fell asleep on me, and now he's like a little demon baby who hates me. I've never raised my voice, never grabbed them quickly or physically forced them to stay still (like to hold them or something). When I go to pick them up I always get down on the ground so I'm not looming above them, and I reach towards them very slowly (with my cowhide gloves on) and say softly "look at me, look at me" to get their attention, because they'll get nervous if they look at the glove and seem better when they look me in the eye. I clean their cage very thoroughly and change their bedding/litter/water dish/food daily. I hold them all every day. I'm trying really hard. I don't understand why the big boy is so afraid of me and what I'm doing wrong. I really don't want to fail them. I love these little guys. I know it's still pretty early on but like I said I feel like he is actually getting worse. Someone suggested hand feeding him treats but he literally won't even eat a treat if I'm holding him, he'll pretend it's not there or hiss at me, and I have to wrap him all the way to his neck in a little blanket so he doesn't try to scratch my face, which he only started doing a few days ago.
I'm just wondering if anyone has any suggestions or advice. Feeling kind of sad and like I'm letting them down. If I could go back a week and a half ago I would still take them in a second, but I'd have tried to mentally prepare more for how difficult this would be (lol)
Thank you all very, very much. I really appreciate your time and I'm sorry for the long and unedited post (I'm just really exhausted)
Cheers!
-angry_cat_mom
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