Letting my beloved cat live outdoors permanently.

[gulbeseker]

Hi guys. I have a saddening question for you. I had a cat for about 8 years. We're living in an apartment with a personel garden. He had never been out. I was even freaking out that he would catch something and get sick if he accidentally stepped on our doormat etc. (Severe health anxiety) (So sad knowing all these and letting him out now.)

So he always had behavioral problems, he was unneutered, randomly spraying throughout the house, peeing on places like sofas or cushions when stressed. (I missed him so much guys.)
We had been married for about 3 years when i found him. He was the littlest thing i've ever known, took care of him like my dearest, so longed baby then we eventually had children.

Many had changed after having children of course, people accused me of being so reckless for letting them live with a cat that they could catch zoonotic diseases or accidentally inhale pet hair etc. I never minded, for i knew a disease free full time indoor cat never poses any health risks for children.

But things changed. Husband started nagging about the cat almost every night, we eventually lost peace, every single human being i knew started to tell me that a cat belonged outside and it is unfair to keep him in. (It is "a" cat for them but a family member for me. They never understood.) They even told me that i was violating their rights because they didn't want a cat odour in their building, (?) didnt want to see pet hair on their window sills, and i was wasting so much water due to caring for a cat. (Those could be forms of passive aggessive behaviour or kind of psychological abuse, if i am to name it.)

So it was a very hard transition, i tried leaving him out at daytime and getting him in at night. One time he got lost for about 3 days, i was constantly calling and looking for him and wept until i met him again. Then I secretly kept him home for some more time, he used to love sleeping in my wardrobe so i came up with an idea, he was free in the house during daytime and then i was hiding him inside my wardrobe when husband had been home for about 2 hours. (Husband didnt stay at home at that period of time because of work.) But that phase also came up to an end.

My cat lives outdoors for about 2 months now. I see him fading away from day to day, yesterday he even refused to eat the wet food he once loved most. So i need advice guys. How can i provide him a comfortable place like he used to have in my home, and how can i prevent other cats eating his food, and how can i prevent him feeling unwanted and left?

I have a 3 year old and a 3 months old baby so i have to beg these people to watch out kids so that i can bring food to my cat. They also keep telling me he should cope with it and i can't take care of him forever.

 

[Margot Lane]

Could he have a catio?

 

[CyberTiger]

I'm so sorry about the situation you're in. It makes me sad and angry. How strange that there were no problems before with your older child, but now there are issues all of a sudden.

I'm in the US and have never, ever in my life heard anyone say you can't have cats & children. Things to be careful about, sure. And never that a cat should be made to live outside on its own either, or ever forced outside. (Aside Fred Flintstone unsuccessfully putting his sabertooth out at night, and I always laughed at him failing and getting locked out for attempting it.)

A catio sounds like the best solution to work within the circumstances, if allowed. If your cat looks unwell, a vet visit may be a good idea. And if he's still unneutered, you might try that when he seems to be doing better.

I would also honestly think on what is in your ability and power to be changed and decided, even if it takes time to sort out. And I would think on if certain flapping mouths can be ignored.

 

[gulbeseker]

Guys, a catio is a great idea. We have available areas for this. I'm going to start planning about it right away. The people I mentioned about above is my husbands family. We are all living in the same space and they greatly dislike and disgust cats. But not in the meaning of hate. They used to prefer standing on their feet when they were in my house instead of sitting on anything that possibly my cat slept or sat on earlier. I've never encountered any idea more irrational, senseless and arrogant than this but people can be so cruel and clueless about what means the most sometimes.
The happiness of my cat meant the world to me. So sad some people will never understand what a genuine love is.

 

[Norachan]

You need to get the cat neutered. This will help with the spraying problem. It doesn't always make older cats stop spraying completely. The best thing to do is get your pets spayed and neutered by 6 months old before any of these problems start. However it should cut down on the spraying, make the smell less potent and also prevent him from wandering to look for a mate.

Has your cat ever been seen by a vet? Issues such as peeing on clothes can be caused by UTIs. If he is going to be a catio only cat it would be a good idea to get him vaccinated too

 

[gulbeseker]

Hi, not regular vet visits but we've been to a couple of times when he seemed ill. I give him dewormers at home.
He doesn't have UTI, I've always watched out for this. He used to spray when stressed, the people I live with would only come in if he is in another room, so when i put him and close the door he would spray curtains etc.

 

[gulbeseker]

What could be the reason of his lessening appetite?

 

[ArtNJ]

What could be the reason of his lessening appetite?

Its summer. Lots of mice, chipmunks and other prey. Even if tastier food is offered by you, hunting is instinctual and they sometimes seem to eat the prey just because its a cat thing to do. Sometimes they just kill something and dont eat it. I dont understand why they sometimes do and sometimes dont, maybe no one does, but that could easily be why the cat is less interested in canned food.

 

[Norachan]

UTI's need to be properly diagnosed by a vet. They would need to check his body temperature and white blood cell count for any signs of infection, test his urine for traces of blood etc. Unfortunately just watching out for this doesn't help. UTI's can be stress induced too.

The lack of appetite could mean anything from dental problems to stomach trouble. As he is an unneutered outdoor cat it's very likely that he comes into contact with other cats, which will put him at risk of all kinds of diseases.

If he were in my care the first thing I would be doing is taking him to a vet to be fully checked over, then booking him a neuter appointment. Once he's had proper vet care he stands every chance of living a long and happy life in a catio. May I ask which country you're located in?

 

[Kflowers]

Cats often spray when they are feeling threatened that another cat or person wants to take over their home and throw them out. How does your husband treat the cat? If he is aggressive or violent toward the cat this would make the cat feel frightened and threatened which can lead to spraying. Same if your children are aggressive toward the cat.

And remember someone who would be abusive toward an animal will, in time, do so to humans. You will want to teach your children to be kind to the cat for the sake of their future spouses and children.

 

[gulbeseker]

Hi, Norachan, I will definitely take your advice and take him to a vet to get checked over. I live in Turkey.

Hi, Kflowers, nine of us has ever been aggresive towards him, they just don't approve of sharing a home and a life with a cat. I will never in the world let any of my children be abusive towards any being, either physically or verbally.

 

[Kflowers]

I'm so glad to hear that. Perhaps there is a strange cat lurking around your house on the outside that your cat is trying to protect you from. We had that happen with one of ours.

as said above getting him neutered will help stop the spraying, though it may take a couple of weeks. He won't mind, really he won't. All it does is keep him from making kittens and running off in search of lady cats to make them with and other male cats to fight to show the lady cat that she wants him. Those fights can be big vet bills. And, boy cats can be gone for weeks of looking for ladies and fighting. They don't even notice when the wounds get infected. It's really rather bad.

 

[iPappy]

Guys, a catio is a great idea. We have available areas for this. I'm going to start planning about it right away. The people I mentioned about above is my husbands family. We are all living in the same space and they greatly dislike and disgust cats. But not in the meaning of hate. They used to prefer standing on their feet when they were in my house instead of sitting on anything that possibly my cat slept or sat on earlier. I've never encountered any idea more irrational, senseless and arrogant than this but people can be so cruel and clueless about what means the most sometimes.
The happiness of my cat meant the world to me. So sad some people will never understand what a genuine love is.

My 3 cats love their catio. They can be outside and enjoy themselves, but are safe. Make sure you research cat/predator-proofing it (covered, sturdy, etc.) And remember, you can utilize vertical space and build it high with shelves, etc. Cats seem to like being up high vs. having a lot of ground space
I'll agree, getting him neutered would be a huge help. It sounds like you're doing all you can for him.

 

[Norachan]

I live in Turkey.

Have you heard of https://www.youtube.com/@waltersanti

They live in Turkey to, they've got a really nice set-up for their cats. Maybe that would give you some ideas?