lap acclimation? lifting and holding?

[barbgee]

I have a semi-feral 4 y.o. that is getting used to life as a tripod, indoors.  She is bonded to me, and I am able to pet her, and can touch her mostly comfortably, but now I'd like to get her on my lap, or comfortable ON me, not just next to me or near me.  Trying to gently move her as I interact with her.  I think actually picking her up will be a longer term goal, but for now, just getting her to put a paw or two on my leg while I pet her is my current goal.  Any tips or tricks to try?

 

[yayi]

It is really up to the cat. Treats can help encourage the wanted behavior but they don't assure cooperation. 

 

[barbgee]

I've been mostly spending time with her just trying to get her more used to being touched with a full hand, with a hand on her tummy and so forth.  She has a lot of little "rules" for when certain kinds of touching in general are okay or not, and she has me very well trained!   Any kinds of touching if I'm standing up she's really not very keen with.  It's that thing of a hand coming down from above, I think.  The lower I am to the ground, the easier the touching, but two hands on her is still pretty uncomfortable, and she squirms away. 

The goal is to ultimately be able to pick her up and move her if I have to, and it makes me nervous to think if I needed to get her into a carrier to see the vet in an emergency or otherwise, that it would be impossible...

I'm letting her set the pace, but there are days where it seems her pace is glacial...

 

[nocturnal]

I know how stressful it is, to be unable to pick up your cat! One keeps imagining emergency situations of all sorts. I've been in the same situation with a stray who oddly enough is a lapcat (just jumped on my lap as I type) and was jumping on my lap within three days of being brought home...but still, picking her up took a lot longer.

I have little experience, being a recent cat owner myself but I suspect ferals (mine was for all practical purposes one) have a harder time not being in control. I suggest you just make yourself passive and give the cat the opportunity to jump on your lap if they are so inclined. As for picking up, lifting seems to be scariest part for a cat so perhaps you could sit on the floor and try to pick up the cat before actually carrying about. With mine I'd wait for feeding time and once she stopped eating I'd gently pick her up.