Jealous kittens -HELP!

[laidnadmss]

I adopted two kittens about two months ago. The shelter wasn't sure if they were litter mates or not. There were two mommas that gave birth to a litter either on the same day or a few days apart and they were basically sister wives and each litter would feed off of them. To start we (my bf and I) got Abbie first, then the next day decided to get her sister, Zhara. They would get along great, they would play, cuddle, bathe each other. They were a little rough at times, but it wasn't anything concerning. Eventually I noticed that if Zhara would climb up in my lap Abbie would follow and try to get closer and sort of push Zhara away. Abbie has definitely assumed the role of dominate in the house and she's more outgoing. Zhara is pretty shy, but we try and give them equal attention. Within the past week I've noticed their "playing" is getting a little rougher. Last night Zhara was walking to the food bowl and Abbie out of nowhere pounced on her, bit the back of her neck and pinned her to the ground. Zhara got away but Abbie kept on attacking her. Then when I was on the couch with them they started biting and fighting each other. Abbie's ears were back and tail was fluffed and swatting back and forth, while Zhara's wasn't. Eventually they both calmed down and were laying with me. Then out of nowhere Zhara bit Abbie's leg and it began again. They aren't drawing blood or anything violent it's just more aggressive and I'm worried. It doesn't seem playful anymore. I'm concerned especially for Zhara, I don't want her living in fear that Abbie is going to pounce at any moment. I don't know what to do. If this is just something they will outgrow or what. They're about to be 5 months old. Any help or advice would be great! Thank you! 

 

[catapault]

Cats are not like us. You want everything to be equal for Abbie and Zhara. That's not how cats work. The more you try to make things equal, the more Abbie will assert her primacy. She should have her food dish put down first, she should be petted first, etc. Once she is confident and relaxed about her alpha status the attempts to attack Zhara should come down.

 

[laidnadmss]

I just feel so bad for poor Zhara. Abbie is more outgoing and playful so she usually gets more attention. My boyfriend will play with her for hours if he could. When we play with them Zhara just kind of sits back and watches Abbie chase the string or toy.

The other day I picked Abbie up first (she greeted me when I came home from work) and Zhara came over to me, stood up, put her paws on my legs and looked up at me and meowed like "Hey! What about me?!" I'm afraid the jealousy is going both ways, since Zhara did bite Abbie last night on the leg out of nowhere. Could it be the dominance hasn't been set yet so that's what they're trying to accomplish? I assumed Abbie was the dominate one based on behavior. Or am I thinking way too hard about this lol   

 

[whiskylollipop]

Of course jealousy would go two ways, every cat wants to be the alpha and every kitten will try and fight for it. But out of concern for Zhara's safety since Abbie seems to be much more aggressive, let Abbie be the alpha. You can make up for it by petting Abbie first for 2 minutes then petting Zhara next for 3 minutes. Zhara will be unhappy about not being alpha at first, but she will get used to it and settle down in time. This could be a tricky situation though, as 2 females tend not to get along very well due to competition for land and resources in case they may someday have kittens to look after. Hopefully yours come to a happy agreement!

 

[laidnadmss]

Thank you so much for your replies. I do think they're still fighting for alpha. This morning I was on the couch and Zhara was laying on my lap and Abbie down by my legs, Zhara went up to Abbie, bit her on the back of the neck and pinned her down - exactly what Abbie had done to her the other night! Of course Abbie wasn't happy as she hissed and fought back. This behavior honestly only happens when they're around me - not my boyfriend (who lives with me, hopefully he doesn't start to get jealous too!). I'm going to add another food bowl, scratching post and bed to the apartment & help that this helps & they can sort it out on their own. I'm going to try petting Abbie first for the next few weeks & see what happens. I just hope Zhara doesn't lash back. She's really come out of her shell since we adopted her & I hope it doesn't affect that!