It's taken a week for me to be able to write this....

[danimarie]

Thank you so much everyone... I'm *JUST* starting to not burst into tears everyday.

It means the world to me that other people understand. I miss her so much everyday, but the weeping has somewhat subsided. I sleep with the impression of her paw under my pillow to feel closer to her.

 

[catsknowme]

Originally Posted by DaniMarie

I sleep with the impression of her paw under my pillow to feel closer to her.

Heaven is much closer than we think

So many wonderful spirits & souls are there, and your precious Mutty is playing happily among them. And just think, she gets to meet your future kitties yet to be born and when it is their turn down here among us, they will have that uncanny ability to know just how and what you like - and you will be able to thank dear Mutty for that

I am glad that you are doing better. For me, the loss is like a shard of glass in the heart. Gradually the pain goes away, for increasingly longer periods of time, but then, when I least expect it, something jars that glass & I feel the pain, fresh again. But it does get increasingly better.

Thank you so much for the update. I've been wondering how you & a couple of others here are doing

 

[danimarie]

Originally Posted by catsknowme

Heaven is much closer than we think

So many wonderful spirits & souls are there, and your precious Mutty is playing happily among them. And just think, she gets to meet your future kitties yet to be born and when it is their turn down here among us, they will have that uncanny ability to know just how and what you like - and you will be able to thank dear Mutty for that

That is so beautiful!!!! I'm so glad you just said that to me.....

Thank you!

 

[caitsith]

"I belive cats to be spirits come to earth. A cat,i am sure,could walk on a cloud without coming through" Jules Verne


My thoughts are with you . Best wishes.

 

[fliss32]

I'm sorry to hear your sad story.
I lost my darling cat Diesel over a year and a half ago to liver cancer. I also had to make the difficult decision to have him put to sleep. I also had him privately cremated and I am so glad I did. It is a great comfort to me that he is still near me in some form. I picked a wooden black cat to have him put in so he will eternally sleep in there.
I'd like to say that time eases your pain and maybe it does a little. Still even now things will remind me of him and I cry like a child. He was always there for me and can never be replaced.
Draw comfort that you loved your cat enough to let go when you had to. You did the best and was not selfish at the end when your cat needed you most.

 

[threecatowner]

Originally Posted by Fliss32

Draw comfort that you loved your cat enough to let go when you had to. You did the best and was not selfish at the end when your cat needed you most.

Based on my experience, I think you definitely did the humane thing for Mutty.
I wish I'd had the courage.

In 1985 my 7-year-old cat Elmer contracted Feline Leukemia. In those days it was hardly heard of, let alone something you could do anything about. We noticed he was breathing hard, took him to the vet, they kept him a couple of days, and finally came up with that diagnosis.

We were given no medications that I recall, no advice on how to get him to eat. I would come home from work and practically beg him to eat, but to no avail. The vet never strongly suggested euthanizing him, and my mom and I didn't have the heart to even consider it.

He went downhill fast, three weeks it took, and his lungs filled up with fluid and he basically suffocated in my bedroom on Easter morning. My mother and I tried desperately to comfort him; we knew we had made a mistake by not easing him out of this life. Never, ever again would I want to do that to a precious animal member of the family.

We had 3 weeks to sort of prepare, although we had no idea how long he would have. You only had a few hours, and I'm sure you are devastated to no end for how quickly you had to make that decision. But it was the right one. Please take comfort in that.

I believe in my heart that you will see a healthy, frolicking Mutty again one day.